Shin

Hi everyone, I was just browsing the web when I found an interesting picture which perfectly describe what I've experienced since I've started my spiritual practice. What is/are your struggle(s) in this list, why do you think are you struggling with it/them (the root cause) ? I think it is a good way to know a bit more about each of us, knowing where we come from and what we have/had to face. Of course it is a very personal subject, but I encourage anyone to talk, it is always liberating to open up I've personally struggled a lot with all of them for all my life (except for conflict). 8 months ago, I would never believed that I would be able to experience such peace, I was extremely neurotics, thinking that everyone was judging me, and I was judging every actions of every person I met. I was judging and treating myself badly every day, thinking that I didn't deserve love, that I was a failure, that I will die alone and that I will never achieve anything of importance. I rarely thought about killing myself, but It was a possibility in my mind. Now for me, my number 1 problem in my life was always about my virginity and my lack of relationship experience. It was a fear so powerful, that just talking to an average girl was impossible until last year. After slow progress in my self-esteem I decided to have my first girlfriend, to erase that fear and see if a relationship can truly make me happy if everything goes right. It did goes right for 6 month, it was a really nice experience, but I let it go sour. I somehow knew she would be happier with someone else, so I let her go, I didn't try to change to keep her, I didn't make effort to be someone I was not , I just wanted her to be happy. My intuition was telling me all along that this relationship wasn't what I needed, and that I should focus on my life purpose/spiritual work. So that's for my trauma, concerning my spiritual work, I was meditating for 2 hours every day, reading a lot about consciousness/non-duality/self-help/psychology, hiking 1 to 2 hours a day comptemplating nature, and the most important, watching my thoughts at every moments, seeing them come and dissolve into the void, trying to locate where they come from while concentrating my "energy" below my belly (centering yourself). Brute forcing your way to looking at reality with a different outlook is what I'm also still doing, which simply consist by stopping your stream of thoughts and looking at what you see from an holistic kind of viewpoint. You just simply look and try to see the big picture, not focusing on the details/people. There is a very weird thing that is happening more and more now, reality seems moving "through me", I also see objects and people and kind of feel like they are "empty" and also more alive (especially for objects). I do have every symptoms by now, and when I think about the person I was just 8 months ago, It is like I was remembering a dream, like none of it was real, like it never happened. So what's your story ?

I know, I have a lovely laugh too, but apparently I can't stop it when It comes

Can an introvert become extrovert, and vice versa ?

Stop people pleasing. Whenever a weird feeling in your stomach arise, be aware of it. Say what you feel is right to say, not what you think you should say. Do things you love, and be very wary of that, because addiction can feel like that. Experiments life, different social interactions, different hobbies.

Good shit, I'm actually living at the border, thank you very much kind sir !

I know about the temple, I live near it. Does the workshop in germany will be in english or in german ?

Hardcore one where you focus on finding your true nature ? ^^

What do you mean by personality ?

It's like you know you're in the matrix, you can sort of sense that you have a fucking VR headset on your head, but you can't get it off ! No matter how much you try, you still really believe that everything you see, is all there is to see, but deep down you know this is all a fairy-tale. I can only feel my body, ok, yes that's true, in my direct experience that's all I can sense. Is it ? No, not really right ? I can sense the wind, what I eat, sounds, and sure it sounds logical because of our sensory tools, but is it really that simple ? In our dreams, nothing is real right ? So how could we have all these sensory experiences in our dream then ? Nothing change in our direct experience, we just rest, but, we still have all these sensory experiences in the dream, and it feels real ! So we are linked to something else, otherwise there would be no dreams, how could be there random dreams, totally randoms, if we were just this entity, shouldn't we just dream about things we know, things that make sense, why dreaming at all ? It doesn't even make sense that we could be a separate mind, because we have so much random thoughts, we should be able to control everything if that was the case, right ? Intuition ? Why would there be intuition if we are a separate being, nothing could interact with us if that was the case ! So Intuition is just knowledge we know but don't remember ? It kinda feel like that, but I kinda have an intuition that it isn't really that ! That's fucked up ! How could I be just the body if I can have thoughts ? Everyone think it's normal, but no, why something that is material could be so interconnected to something immaterial as thoughts ? Ok, there is the brain but, why the thoughts ? Why not just act mechanicaly then ? How could I be the thoughts if I can watch them and silent them (sort of) whenever I focus on them ? I should totally be identified with them, like a machine, but it's not the case. I can remember that I was thinking very poorly about me, and sometimes it was the contrary, and for some weeks now, I don't even think I'm less or more than what I am, I'm just "that", and it's ok, why would it not be ok to be "that" ? So again, how could we be "that", if our opinion of it and other "things" can change so drastically ? I was a very different person 20 years ago, but still, the consciousness that arise of this body is still the same, I'm still me, despite thinking totally differently, and after all the roles I played. SO WHAT THE FUCK MAN ???!!!

No, my subconscious mind let her go in the sense that I didn't really cared about the relationship anymore. Consciously I was too weak to let her go, but deep down I knew I had to do it, one way or another.

If your objective is to realize who you really are, add 30 minutes of self-inquiry (right after your meditation would be nice).

Do you realize that a jellyfish has no brain ? You need a brain to have thoughts right ? ... Profit !

Nature is better than sex, I love trunks.

So yesterday I experienced that I'm not the body, not the brain, not the thoughts, and even not the consciousness that perceive all of this. Ok, now I'm starting to REALLY understand why no one talk about this

It is just very easy to get lost in it when you just start, which is paradoxical, since almost no one start on its own. It can be helpful to meet people who knows about this stuff, but if you have to know someone like that, talk to a master and ask him who are conscious enough to know about what they are talking, otherwise you'll get pulled into fairy land by some of the students.

I never followed any religion or any particular practices, and it's working pretty well. Not that any specific practices can't be helpful, there is certainly some that you prefer, which are easier for you, BUT you don't need one in particular, and you certainly don't need to follow or to be part of a certain group of people, this is all a trap. You don't need any of this, you only need to look what's true in your direct experience. You are not the body, not the brain, not the thoughts, So what are you ? DON'T THINK about it, LOOK

Eliminating a part of your anxiety around women. It won't solve everything, because the need for love isn't about not being good with women, it is about not realizing that you aren't a separate entity from the whole, which is what spirituality is about. Yes, and this is why spirituality is important, because it is only through this that you can see that everything a reflection of you

Now wait to found your passion, and then, to get on track with it, and THEN to live it. It's gotta be even more emotional, like you've never experienced emotions before

One night stand sex can sucks big time. Sex in a long-term relationship when both partner are willing to master this component ? Except deep non-duality experiences and living your life purpose, there is nothing else that match that. Don't miss that experience, sure you don't need it, but at least taste it once, it's really fucking cool to make scream your girlfriend so much that the neighbors call the cops ! No one said that. EDIT: oupsy, yes he did, nevermind.

It is more a matter of being honest with yourself. Plenty of people want to be honest, they are just afraid to be vulnerable/rejected in doing so.

The trick is to stop assuming there is certain part of the game that aren't enjoyable. Actually, stop assuming anything.

But you can't deny that you often laugh for nothing and have fun with basically nothing. Yes it is not constant excitement like getting to know your new girlfriend/boyfriend, or when you take some lsd, but it's pretty fucking fun

When you play a game and you take it too seriously, it sucks right ? Now imagine playing the game with cool people you choose to play with, just for fun. Imagine that you play that game, not just randomly, but with a career that has a deep meaning for you, which litterally gives you goosebumps just by thinking about it, and imagine that everyone that is close to you, understand perfectly why and how it feels to do what you do. In the game, you are totally conscious of every flaws your character has, and how you can better it to experience all facets of what the game has to offer, because you know that the game has such a variety of activities, that it feels infinite, which it is. Also imagine that you can litterally see yourself in every part of the game, that everywhere you look, you see your reflection, playing an another part of the game, and whatever this part is doing, you're cool with it. Wouldn't be fun ? Wouldn't be PROFOUND ? Wouldn't be MAGICAL ? #CopyrightisdeadyoumadleoKappa

Detachement simply means that you enjoy things as they arise, for what they are, without expectation. When you don't have any expectation, there is no suffering in the sense that you don't cling to anything, you don't need anything for you to be happy ("negative" emotions will still occur though) In my experience, I already can be pretty detached from a lot of things, I guess the only reason I'm still attached to some things is because I didn't adress the psychological root cause, not because I'm not enlightened (even though I don't have any exemple in mind, there probably is). Now to be detached to the extreme (your own death, torture, rape etc), yes, enlightenement is necessary, you most surely can't be detached from those kind of things if you still think that you are the body/mind.

It won't go that fast, don't worry, every pain you will ever feel will always pass IF you apply these techniques (and don't forget them)