Spiral

That sex was alright, not amazing by any stretch of the imagination. Our problem was with communication, she was extremely shy and had problems opening up. This in turn led to a ready awkward vibe outside the bedroom, we basically had nothing to talk about, like literally nothing. Not even for five minutes. First person I've ever had that problem with. I also weren't in love with her so the the relationship was kind of doomed to being with. Although I'm not blaming her for the break up, she did nothing wrong and I hope her the best, but it was a bad match to being with.

@LaucherJunge So you mean a girl who wants to have a actual relationship? That's not that rare dude... sure lot's just wants to sleep around but it's all about where you look for them. Nightclubs and tinder is kinda a waste of time in this regard.

@LaucherJunge Are you saying you won't go for 10/10 aka a flawless girl if you get the chance? Or are you just saying you're picky? Nothing wrong with being abstinent but, you're not going to find the perfect girl and that's coming from me and I have ridiculous expectations.Either way it's fine just live your life until the feels hit you, then you feel differently and things resolve themselves.

@BobbyLowell Respect is something a guy needs, just common decency will do the trick. Similar to how you expect you friends to respect your time and so on. Guys require respect, but you won't get a guy by just being respectful towards him. Just like a guy won't get you just because he finds you attractive. While I do not like giving sneaky tricks, because that gives someone a false perspective of you. Showing that you think that your worth is not derived from your looks is something I find attractive. I suppose you can talk to him and flirt a little bit. Tell me about him, is he the popular guy all the girls like? How old is he and how do you know him/of him?

@Light Lover Well the answer was for my younger self. You are free to disagree, it's was just my opinion. "Hot girls" is a term i would use for kids that age, because that's what I cared about at that time. 15 year olds can reflect on that and if they find value in the can change their behaviour, if not then that's fine.

Work on your self-worth and confidence outside of social interaction.

Breaking up is the way to go, not because she expects you to pay but because you have to, to begin with. People who's always getting in trouble is not worth the trouble. Changing people is the absolute last option.

@Lorcan There is absolutely some truth to that girls over 25 tend to be more serious about wanting a relationship. Which feels a bit backwards but alright, to each their own I guess.

@Nadosa You said that you are dating, did you meet her online, pickup or casually? There are a plenty of ways to deal with awkward silences, although getting super nervous about them is one of the worst ways. First and foremost silence is not necessary a bad thing, but if it's a constant awkward vibe around to them ? yes, it does effect you results poorly. The most common reasons this happens in the first place is that you don't ask questions or respond in a effective way. Asking questions that can be answered with yes/no is generally kind of boring and does not go anywhere. While you can't effect how she create her questions, it up to you how you respond to them. Also of course this both of yours responsibility, but if you know the tricks you will not have to deal with this problem.

Everyone is not capable of love, but everyone can be loved.

I've or a long time had a preference for female friends for a variety of reasons, but I've decided to expand my horizons and start to get some male friends. I've for some time had some for party purposes, but as I'm sure you can imagine people who you only party with are not the most meaningful friendships. These are somethings I've noticed: 1. Guys spend 80% of their time talking about girls in some way, pickup or sex or their ex or a girl the like or whatever.Now if we have to talk about something else of course we will do that most of the time, but when are just hanging out for the sake of hanging out. Now sure I can talk about girls to some extend, but the point at least for me was to kind of have something unrelated to girls. A study friend, always asks when we meet, how thing are going with which ever girl he saw me hanging out with last. Hinting that he wants to know whether or not I've gotten some "action". Now I get it, but it's gets old very fast. I get a feeling he is having problems with girls yet for some reason he wants to impress me by showing me some chat he had with some girl or whatever. When out with my party friend he is always talking about "how to get some pussy"(to use the words, he uses). Now that's fine, I don't hang out with him that much and we can pull some fun stuff with the ladies. The problem is outside a party, he is almost always on about how to get girls or making jokes about girl related topics. 2. I've also noticed that guys are very.... I wouldn't call it competitive but it's like they need to show off or fight for some reason. Prove their worth might be a good way to put it. Had a guy hit me quite a lot for talking to his crush, I did not even know he liked her and we were not friends. 3. Also guys in many cases have a poor view of girls, it's ridiculous, being all like "girl are only useful for sex" or whatever. I think that's kind of sad. 4. Lastly, whats with guys being afraid of other guys? I'm not big and muscular but very often guy show fear or at least keep their distance if I meet them in a corridor. Now I've not hurt anyone or even talked to these guys but they are like inherently afraid of me. If it was some really nerdy insecure guy fine maybe he is like that with a a lot of people, but it can be really "popular" guys with lots of other friends and success with girls. If I have a chat with them, normally this thing goes away, but find I find it strange. Now yes sure I'm not the pickiest guy when it come to male friends but, the world of male friendship is not my strongest area of expertise. I was primarily raised by a single mother and no siblings but 3 stepsisters and mostly female friends growing up. Don't really have any stereotypically male hobbies. Do you have have any tips for how to create male friendships and/or improve the once you already have?

@Marinus How would you feel if, she had sex with you on your birthday, and the day after you lost all your interested in her? Now I'm not saying this is the going to be the case but it very often is. Pro tip After the two of you have kissed once, you can kiss her again later if you want to, although make sure it is a reasonable situation and not in public unless you know she is comfortable with that (Girls don't want to come off as sluts and all that) If you have kissed her in the past, a good next step is cuddles with lot's of kissing, if you want to go ham you can lightly kiss her on the neck a few times, girls love that shit. (To be honest even if I like that) Once you get to the "kissing,cuddle and neck kissing" stage things tend to play out the way you want to. In my experience getting a girl to the stage where she wants to kiss you is the hardest, once they two of you is getting a lot of cuddles and kissing her none emotional mind takes over and stuff happens. Also being "bad" is not something bad, ironically. She is testing you, often called a "shit test". Unless you do something unethical you're not mean. While your response was a "nice guy response" you did create a proper date out of it, so that's good.

1. Well, I don't really get the intellectual conversations I want from girls. Sure girls can talk about relationships and friendships and feelings to a great degree but in my experience not more theoretical things. 2. For me masculinity is all about being ground in one self and confidence. 3. It's something I've observed in my age group (18-23), that does not mean it objectively true. That has just been my experience. I have listen to the first half of that book, and yes I held some insight but it felt like he repeatedly said same thing over and over again. @smd They are lonely yes, drinking to much, well some of them. I can imagine this is what will become of them when they can older. I do think age does play a big factor here, these guys you describe have more things going on and might even have a girlfriend/wife. So there is lots of other things to talk about, most guy where I live are single, some are good with girls some are not. It doesn't really matter in the end. Now yea I've had a conversation about stocks with one of them, but I was very brief and only once. If I bring it up now then it's just "it's going good, bought some stuff sold some stuff, you know the basics" Girls are not a reward! That's a problematic mind set you have. I see myself as a reward, although that is also to some degree problematic

You can't do anything, that really sucks but that just how it is. All you can do is work on yourself so that one day they will see the value in what you have achieved.

@Ayilton I should work on making the relationship work, yes but shouldn't try to change the other person. I can offer them advice and guidance when they want it, but I can't make them like things they don't. Say I really like tennis but she does not, I can force her to like it. My ex for instance only liked to go on walks and cuddle/ have sex, otherwise all her hobbies were the type you do alone or that I had no interest in like: French literature. She was great on paper otherwise kind, caring and so on. But I do want a little more the cuddles/sex and walks.

Leo’s top strength is... something we should not speculate in, because we don't know him.

A necessary evil.

@Deep Ok, although I don't you completely on the wrong track. @tyler7415 That's absolutely a fair point. @aurum Are you saying I'm egoic? no but, yeah hobbies is definitely one of the things I should work on. Better step up my meditation gains too. Maybe you have helped a guy making friends, by which he meant male friends. A lot of people in my life are unfamiliar with this and female friends does bring a lot of unwanted drama, feelings and jealousy.

@Markus It is common that you lose the friend in the process, if that's what you mean. (or rather the friendly aspects you had before)

Here is the "cuddle technique" Make a girl that you find attractive a friend of yours. Arrange it so that you cuddle with her. Cuddle in a way that turns her on. Profit. Cuddle when with her when ever you want some sexy time. Also no girl what's to be a official fuck buddy, keep that on the low.

"Hearing" never seen this works being used in this contex before. English is not my native language . Sorry don't really have any useful advice besides that think you should move on and work on yourself instead of this relationship.

@Deep Regarding "sexism" I did not mean everyone, just to a surprisingly high degree. That was a extreme example, I quoted from my neighbor, there are more subtle ways as well. What's my masculine ego? Do you mean my masculine side? I don't really think i'm particularly girl-like, I too like sex but it's not a priority for me. If I want to get laid I don't need to work for it because of the way my social life works. I'm not particularly emotional or indecisive either but, yes I barely have anything in common with most guys in regards to hobbies. Sports and video games bore me, do like whisky though. I work out, I study IT. I'm not saying i'm masculine or not. Some girls think i'm really masculine some think I'm really feminine. On the more feminine I suppose I do like to get cozy with a blanked and cuddle up with a female friend/girlfriend of mine and watch a movie, without any intentions of sex (most of the time ) Seems to me like lots of guys care a lot about this, I don't really see why. How would one embrace their masculine side?

@Shroomdoctor Yeah that's a good idea I'll try that.

The level of distraction a person need, is different for different people. So people with less problems are fine with small things, while people with big problems need greater things like drugs sex etc. Although I do think this is just like mr Shroomdoctor said. Also some people have "big no go zones" so the a like the don't like people being that physically close. I was like that when I was younger, it comes from insecurity. @supremeyingyang As an addition to that, for clearly, do you want her or just a girl?

A machine that can detect a persons level of consciousness so I in a easy way can pick friends, employees and girlfriend(s). So people don't have to spend time probing people.