Epsilon_The_Imperial

"I" am everything. I am not attached to the individualized ego because when I closed my eyes and tried to fix myself upon an "I", I felt so clearly and without any fanfare that the "I" does not really belong to me, but belongs to everything as the "I". It was like, "oh." I realized that I am as much the universe as I am the body and soul sitting before you here. Yes, there is a soul, but that's an occult topic. I feel like the boundaries of what we take the "I" is not just the body. Even as I'm typing this, I feel different, like my consciousness IS the field of all consciousness. That's what it means to be one. The consciousness that you have is not just your one embodied perspective, your consciousness is necessarily a consciousness of the all because there is no difference. This is so simple when the experience hit me. It was not as if I had an "experience", but simply a moving of my awareness. It happened so serenely and naturally that I was surprised, and this is the best I could communicate it. It was like a flower opening up suddenly and "here I am." @Leo Gura

I have my own path and spiritual goals, and a lot of figuring out to do. When it just comes to the issue of Enlightenment, I'm not sure exactly how to approach the practice. For me, the insights come and goes naturally. I don't know how much practice will affect the process, or whether practice itself is a mechanical process and the awakening just dawns on you. However, there must be a purely contemplative/mental way for the ego to more easily unfold than self-inquiry, because it seems like it falls under the hamster wheel. Is there a more gentle way for a person to deliberately release the fear-contractions so they can efficiently do the work that meditation and self-inquriy are supposed to do? I feel like those could be compared to staring at a brick wall and waiting for it to break or for yourself to break rather than simply yawning and taking a look out the window to see the sun.

The ego is an idea. It is a self-generating, self-reflexive idea. It exists only to itself. The same thing holds true for Spirit. It is self-generating and creates its own essence in its own becoming. Spirit is a contraction of the self. Spirit perceives the idea of the ego just as much as the ego perceives something in its environment. The self of the ego is the reflection of the self-contraction of spirit. The process of Spirit perceiving the ego is the contraction process in effect. Spirit is perceiving ITSELF AS the ego. That's why when you are dying, your world is literally dying and crumbling. You ARE your own world, EVERYTHING. The second part about Spirit is a philosophical and occult truth, which is simply why I mention it. The first part is why so many people are stuck. It's like a hamster wheel. You just keep running on it until you get tired and you get off. That's what Enlightenment is. I know there's something I need to get back to, but I'll get back to it and fill in the gap.

Thanks man! To be honest, I'm not sure what Enlightenment should feel like exactly. Some say it's simple. Others say that it's extremely earth-shattering. I feel like it's when your insights are engrained in your awareness for a long time, almost permanently. There are levels, but exactly what level is considered real enlightenment can be subjective depending on your background. Good luck to you too. <3

Provide feedback and perspective.

I'm not saying that I'm not attached to my body, because I still exist to me. So, I didn't say I'm a master.

Many of the older, more advanced members seem to have left. I get the impression that the higher you go in spirituality, the less you are willing or able to communicate properly what is going on with your processes. You are able to let life guide you. Most people here are focused on a certain level of realization, but what is the difference between the higher levels and the ones here. I.e, why have the older, more advanced members left? What is the difference in perspective and insight? How does the process feel different to those on a higher level? @Leo Gura I feel that there is a lot of insight missing here that is seldom shared.

If you want, the answers can also be revealed to you elsewhere.

In one of his earlier, videos, Leo said that he had chronic fatigue issues. @Leo Gura In case anyone didn't know, entity and negative spirit attachment can cause fatigue issues, among other physical ailments. This comes from them draining your vital energy and attaching to your head. DMT, and the use of psychedelics can open holes in the aura. Holes in the aura leaves openings for negative entities to enter your etheric and astral body. Hence, be careful to cleanse your space and use psychedelics appropriately. I say this because the people here are not aware of the larger field of spirituality, and accept a more limited, almost secularized set of Enlightenment teachings. I also say this because there are many, many potential causes for even simple things such as fatigue, which can be a manifestation of a myriad of things such as lack of proper sunlight/imbalanced circadian rhythm, heavy metal exposure, etc. https://www.phoenixrisinghealing.com/negative-spirit-attachments I urge you. DO NOT simply dismiss the more new-age side of spirituality as mere quackery. The information on energy work, healing, working with spirit guides, astrology, and the understanding of the collective consciousness can be very valuable and life-saving. I guarantee you, you probably have a spirit attachment as most people are not aware they have them. Normal things such as anxiety, depression, lack of energy, irritability, mood flare-ups, and intrusive thoughts are very frequently caused by spirit attachment. Negative entities feed off negative moods, the most prevalent being fear and anxiety. They can also prevent you from connecting to your higher self, although most people aren't aware of how that even feels. Your higher self helps connect you to divine guidance. Negative entities also feed off of negative beliefs and thought patterns in your subconscious. They feed off of negative mental energy, sexual energy, and food from your stomach. They can also cause irritable bowel syndrome, digestive problems, and heart disease. DO NOT be afraid. You simply need to raise your vibration and investigate healing methods for reclaiming lost parts of the soul and for removal. We all lose parts of our soul due to traumatic experiences. We isolate those parts of ourselves to prevent more pain, and entities can steal them. You can also lose them at night when your dream body travels to other dimensions. Also, DO NOT ASSUME THAT YOU DO NOT HAVE ENTITY ATTACHMENTS BECAUSE YOU DON'T FEEL ANYTHING. Negative moods can become normalized over decades, and entities can hide in our aura because of energetic implants that mask them. Again, I highly, highly reccommend that anyone spiritual investigate how to remove entity attachments, because if you are a spiritual person involved with trying to raise the consciousness of the planet, you are probably already having an entity on you.

Everybody has different interpretations of the same experience, and they can be plausible based on how you define the inner and the outer worlds and on your particular vibration-perception. I would say though, that people who come into this field still have an objective-detached scientific worldview. You're plastering that onto spirituality, and defining your ontology based on a certain level of Enlightenment teachings that does not allow you to go deeper. Simple things like entity attachment shouldn't bother people in a field where high-level masters are having experiences that would literally blow people's minds away and send the wrath/power of God shivering through your soul. Again, compare this trivial truth with Leo's perceptions of Absolute Infinity (I'm not even saying that that is a high-level experience). Except, I don't think people would raise an uppity about that, or about the numerous Enlightenment experiences and the particular interpretation we have of them. Honestly, I would be curious to hear if @Leo Gura ever looked into it or did a clearing of negative energy.

I think the first and the second statements are not mutually exclusive. Also, the first statement is not cause for incredulity, as spirits do exist in a sensible manner, just don't expect hard, physical evidence.

I still have to clear them, but what's been happening is an attachment to negative thoughts and phobias. When people talk about psychic attack, it's their subconscious fears manifesting themselves as negative energy. Entities can also attempt to manipulate your subconscious into being more fearful and anxious in an irrational manner. It takes, again, high vibrations to force them out.

Yes I did. I went online to find solutions, and gathered what I know from the website I linked and other synchronicities.

It's not any more woo-woo than what we're exposed to on a daily basis.

I just had an Enlightenment insight while I was listening to subliminals. All of this. Wisdom, gurus, teachings, fighting, forums, methods. It's a tool. I'm not saying mastery doesn't exist. However, this all obscures the same fundamental truth that you and I and everything are all the same unity of experience. The Face of God, is staring right back at you and is present as everything at once. Take a step back and appreciate those experiences more.

I never said that wasn't true to an extent.

I see the people drifting here, from place to place. Lost, as things appear one by one to fill the void. Devoid of understanding, seeking the fulfillment of your being in reality. Knowledge, ideas, experiences, wordplay, awareness play, the gap of separation that conjoins in intimate renewal What is indescribable becomes confined by its impossibility, and the gap of words communicates this perfectly in imprecision. I see people become find homes in the areas of life that resonate with their interests, knowledge unknown by the masses. Even young people today, are finding a gap between the world of their forebearers and the world they and their future children inhabit. Their world, their beliefs are growing separate and more disjointed from the surroundings in which they find themselves. As the new world comes into being, the seeds of its growth find themselves alone. Every entreprenuer laughed at by his friends and family. Every spiritualist dismayed with his or her perceived spiritual mainstream Every intellectual disenfranchised from a society that looks down on supposed irrelevancy. Every scientist upset at the lack of critical thinking. Every naturalist aggravated by the industrialization of society and the reification of logical structures. Every political activist fighting against the beliefs of their society. Every person trying to find natural and reliable solutions for their lives in the society we live in. Every youth or person of observation developing thoughts and ideas of their own in relation to their environment. Last but not least, every person struggling against the culture in which they live because of their own ways, whether that be foreign, traditional, or developed. It's hard for many people to find others with which to share these things, because for many there is a difference between your way of thinking and that of your parents, so even from early childhood there is a disconnection to a grounded sense of being in an environment that supports you. What are the most important personal relationships you have that factor into your life? Something that makes you "you" feel welcomed? It could be a casual friend who happens to have the same interests and with whom you occasionally talk about these things, but that level of connection perhaps isn't enough. Discuss. This is important

I've went back through one of Leo's old videos on happiness and success. I came to realize that if you grasp what he says, the end conclusion is that you have to accept your own death at any moment in order to truly be happy. As in, it does not matter if you are going to die or that you project your death into the future, you accept the reality of the situation anyways. Yet, the only way to do this is to already be dead, in a sense. Like the title says, there is no "you" to die. But how can we prepare for our "death" without dying? Do we just "kill" ourselves now and make everything else easier?

I'm talking about Enlightenment.

Hi @Leo Gura I wanted to clarify some things and report on my progress. When I wrote my last post, the question wasn't implying the Enlightenment was just a hallucination. On the contrary, I recognize the reality of mystical awareness. I was trying to articulate the idea that subconscious programming and intention have us "tap into" a particular slice of reality. That slice of reality says, "Nothing is real. Everything is Nothing. There is no something". If you think of the awareness as a radio tuner, then what I was saying was that various mystical cultures only "tune" into a particular reality. Regardless, that's not what I really wanted to talk about today. For the past two years of my life, I've been highly resentful of people and of general culture because I thought people were devaluing the things that I loved. As a result, I wouldn't listen to people because I felt that it was a way to take me away from those very same things. It's only now that I realize that people were just trying to help me grow up and become more mature as a person. I've already talked about the value that I hold dearly for intellectual life and philosophy. It's the bold effort to secure for human knowledge the satisfaction of piercing into the Mysteries. Thrice that though, is the recognition of the beauty of the elevation of our consciousness through the human imagination. The imagination... ferment to great visions, and the enthralling beauty of that peculiar understanding host only to the play of ideas. I want to give more context... when I talk about this, I don't want to present the image of a very cold person, who only understands logic as symbols. It all started in my literature class. Something awakened in me as I allowed myself to get lost the daydreams of characters, romantic images of wilderness and the gentle passing of time set against what seemed to be paintings in the imagination. The rest is merely the attempt to envision truth, knowing that it is beautiful when put together. No, envisioning the wider reality of the world, knowing that understanding is sublime. What can be the practical value of pure theory seen from this standpoint? I have felt at times as though I have placed myself into a victim complex. I've felt as though I've had to defend my own enjoyment of this. Is this all perverse enjoyment? Or something....noble? More specifically, I have put myself into the mindset as though I was being deprived of the right to love such things if I couldn't see it being shared by other people. It's only now that I realize that the element that I was missing was Self-Love. The rest is my own history. I left Actualized.org because I didn't feel satisfied by this form of spirituality. I wanted to bring to my own attention something... greater. Something able to fulfill my thirst for knowledge. I found the Left Hand Path. I found Magick. I found the Occult. I called to it, it came to me and I came to it. The rest of my development is something I will keep personal, because I don't want to distract this with a discussion on Magick or the Occult. However, I had to mature. I had to grow up. I had to start learn how to take responsibility for my own life. On many levels I am trying to develop myself. I'm looking to develop myself as an entrepreneur. I'm looking to develop myself as a magician. I'm looking to develop myself as a philosopher. I'm looking to develop myself as an intellectual. I'm looking to self-actualize and obtain emotional mastery, and after all this time, I am finally dipping my toes back into Enlightenment practices because I realize something. I realize that if I really wanted to become a true magician, I have to absorb any and every form of knowledge to further my ascent. Yes, that includes the Mystical paradigm as well. I cannot afford to leave it on the table, and yes, technically speaking it's not "knowledge". But the most pressing matter is to develop Wisdom. All kinds of Wisdom, all kinds of mastery from many different people. Life wisdom though, that has been particularly uncomfortable. Leo, I've fallen into the trap of taking my life purpose too seriously. In taking life too seriously, I deprive myself of self-love. I deprive myself of the enjoyment, the pure magic of the things I have passion for. Now, when I think about them in my mind, I feel a contraction in my solar plexus and a raw heat within my chest. I'm also afraid of other people. I'm afraid that I will be criticized and that it will shock me to my core. It's when I begin to look up to all of these masters and people in different areas, I'm realizing all the bullshit I have to clear up in my own life. When I see how you post lately, I see that you've been turning into a wolf, and I don't blame you. I can't blame you. It's the feeling you get when you just feel.... bad, and your heart sinks. Yet, you are slightly terrified. That's where I need advice on self-love. It's not that I don't have confidence necessarily, it's that I feel drained and tired sometimes. It feels like I have to slog it out. I muster my strength to push through, but I only create more internal resistance. I realize that I have to rely on myself to feel loved and cared for, because I can't always control how other people feel. I try to allow myself to enjoy things. Sometimes I just run my hands over the leather of my seat, or I lose myself int the present moment and realize that I am an emptiness devoid of anything. Not staring at anything, but always there. I can't stare at it. I AM it. Leo, I don't have any hard feelings against the forum. I've been curbing my arrogance because finding flaws in others is cheap, understanding is gold.

Hi Leo, How do we know that our language and belief systems are not creating the "experiences" of Source, Infinity, and Void? I'm not really saying that our consensus reality is anymore real than any other hypothetical reality, but in even positing the question, I'm led to believe that there is really no way of getting over the fact that reality has no ground. The only way we can reliably obtain understanding is by being led by the hearsay of others in order to reproduce the same "experiences" that they have. Only, there really is no such thing as experience at all, because you're not experiencing anything outside of yourself. There's fundamentally no difference between you and the stars or spaces inbetween. Even the concept that our mind is creating these illusions is itself an illusion. There is no illusion, and every experience or concept is valid on its own accord, on the very fact that it can be imagined, it is imagined within our own reality-mental space as an existent thing or idea. On that basis, everything is valid, thoughts and ideas included, by the very fact that they exist. There is no difference between the "reality" of the physical and the mental. Ideas don't have to be "actualized" in order to exist. It seems to me that the only basis that we really have to value some things more than other things are the experiences that other people tell us to be true, to be more true than what we have. We are force-fed our reality. "Oh, but Infinity and Void both transcend.....blah blah blah..... mind is limited blah blah blah...... ego.... blah blah blah" " Once you have the experience of your mind being shattered by the rock-hard cock of infinity!..... blah blah blah" The point is, how do we really know that these mystical insights really transcend our own minds? If reality has no ground, how can we say that Absolute Infinity is any more primal, more real, or the groundswell of our coarse, physical actuality? I'm going to quote this from a person I ran into, "Yeah, it's just crazy that people go around claiming that this or that is the truth because that's what their experience is. I mean - c'mon. At any rate - this brings to mind the question that - if that is the case - how do we know for certain that when we join with source, or merge with the god consciousness, that, even though it may be an intense experience - how can we be absolutely certain that it's not a fabrication of the experience because it's what we're expecting - just like the Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, etc. I mean - when they come back, they're absolutely convinced of their spiritual experience. Likewise, so is the believer of the All. The person who experiences nirvana or enlightenment? Though, I know they're not "technically" the same thing. But you get my point. At what point can we actually say, "that was intense, and it was very very real. In fact, I cannot deny it. However, is it possible that it is just another experience brought on by expectation and belief?" That's the real question." @Leo Gura

How do we really know that there is nothing beyond the Void, beyond Nothing? Everyone that I've talked to has said something similar, that the Void is all there is and all that will ever be. The Void, the point at which all logic and causality cease, that which came into being for absolutely no reason at all, from which everything came. Again, for no reason at all (I'm aware that according to you, Void and infinity are the same thing). Everything has no ground. The Void is all there is. The light of God, our light, is the Void. Consequently, all that we experience comes from the Void. Why stop there? Why not go beyond the Void? Ah, but in the very act of questioning, aren't I drawing on its power? To open up a space for creativity? Fine, there is no reason why we can't go beyond the Void. @Leo Gura

Honestly, I'm starting to think that the truth of any experience is self-grounding. If you are God, and there is nothing outside of you, then you can only appeal to yourself. Your experience is all that you have, and you are the only one who can give it validation and when there don't have to be grounds outside of yourself. Seeking grounds for experience outside of yourself is like seeking water in outer space when it's already here, on Earth. @Leo Gura

Power, power and domination. That is all.

Leo, this is Epsilon here from the forum, and I would really appreciate it if you would comment on this post here. For a while now, I have sort of taken a break from your content and from consuming personal development information in general, just for a few weeks. One of my biggest problems with the culture of self-help and spirituality is how these fields eschew higher, theoretical understanding and knowledge in favor of practical knowledge and a direct, unmediated experience and integration of the Real, Absolute, God, or however you want to call it. The prevailing assumption is that it is impossible to develop a personal understanding of these experiences because the way that human understanding works is that it is based on thoughts. Those thoughts have to grasp onto objects, language, and mentally-constructed spaces and environments within which these different mental images can occur. Like you said, these thoughts and beliefs are grounded in assumptions, assumptions which define how the thought plays out. Furthermore, thoughts are often subject to self-serving biases and circular logic. Our thinking, even when we use the help of intuition, can never be the thing itself. It is always a synthetic reality that we create because it equips us with mental tools for interfacing with our environment. Our suffering, our emotions, our aspirations and our fears all play into how we construct our beliefs and concepts. The point is, we're not good enough for the absolute truth, we have to put ourselves aside and subject ourselves to a rigorous practice and study of even the fundamentals of fundamentals before we can proceed with any certainty or hope towards an immanent experience of non-duality. Even becoming truly mindful of your thoughts and actions takes effort, concentration, and consistency to punch through the illusions-so to speak. So what is my problem? The problem is that with the self-help spirituality culture, it doesn't realize that it is also a culture with its own assumptions. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not about to trumpet the divine truth of a "rational" universe, nor am I going to project any spiritual dogma or spiritual misgivings. What I'm concerned with is that self-help spirituality culture claims to be self-empowering, but it can also be oppressive and dismissive of the personal needs and agendas of the people who would otherwise be okay with using these techniques or tarrying with these different consciousness-based philosophies.This is the same problem with academia, where you are subject yourself to the Truth, the universals which define everything else. You don't really matter. You're biased and flawed, shut up and do the work. I myself have already defined my life purpose to be a philosopher-sage, where I can navigate both the abstract and the concrete to make both immanently tangible under the light of intuition and my own experience. When I read the phenomenology of spirit or the critique of pure reason, my intuition does a lot to make these concepts real for me, in a way where I can just see these things play out in my life or in the world around us. Even though I am aware that this really only applies to our base level of consciousness and that it is still a model which probably falls apart somewhere, this sort of rational-intuitive understanding has still benefited me enormously. It is beautiful and sweet in and of itself, even though it takes suffering and a perceptive eye to reach this level of philosophical understanding. Even though it may be dismissed by self-help culture and self-help spirituality as merely theoretical nonsense, this is still practical for me because to me, it's important that we also use our intuition to develop a big TOE with abstract concepts by making them real to us in our own experience. It may not be the Absolute Truth, but it would be myopic and oppressive on the side of mysticism to reduce all the effort found in philosophical-intuitive understanding to mere illusions, just as it would be the same for philosophers or rationalists to reduce all mystical practices to mere illusions. Regardless of whether or not something is in line with the absolute infinity of God, it doesn't invalidate the personal desires of people who would seek to develop their own big TOE which fits in line with their inclinations or proclivities. Every person is different, and it's perfectly fine if they don't do all the practices or think about their experiences in the same light as a strictly spiritual person would. That's not to say all perspectives are valid, but all perspectives should be tailored to the person while maintaining a grounding in the universals/Truth/experience/being/ existential understanding. It's never been my goal to contain Truth within a conceptual framework, but it's always been my goal to love perspectives and see the truth in them, spiritual or otherwise, to develop an intellectual ethics of love which brings me closer to the thoughts of other people so that I'm also closer to their reality. In turn, I see my own reality in a new light and become aware of what structures my assumptions, but at the same time differentiating my own and empowering myself with my own philosophy. It would be oppressive and cruel to discount the value of that as being merely delusion, because to discount the ideas of a person would also be to deny the suffering and needs of that person; all synthetic reality is based in suffering and in ego, but it comes out of suffering and ego when it comes across what Levinas calls a "trace" of the divine. Even though people aren't aware of it, there is always some connection or distortion to the Divine, however small, which helps us as well. The same goes for the ego and for the ego's needs as well. Rather than denying the ego or clinically addressing how the ego can be strengthened or loved, it shouldn't be looked down upon to truly value the ego for all of its suffering, delusions, and emotions. It doesn't seem to make logical sense, but we're also important, the individual which thinks that it persists even through Enlightenment, because the illusion can still be beautiful. We still matter.