Raphael

I'M REACTIVE AGAINST STAGE BLUE I'm distracting myself right now by ranting on stage blue. Even if I'm overall happier and I learned a lot about acceptance since the last ten months, I'm still having difficulties to deal with stage blue. I can get sometimes outraged by its stupidity. This needs to change and be turned into compassion and acceptance. Maybe experiencing even more stage blue would be the solution... I have to stay careful that my ego doesn't pervert this journal by mindlessly ranting on stage blue or other things I don't like.

STAGE BLUE LEARNING MODE Stage blue learns mostly by repeating existing patterns. The more a work is identical to the original, the better it is, most of the time differences are seen as bad quality work. So innovating and improving things that exist is bad.

HAVING STAGE BLUE MANAGERS Two of my managers are stage blue, one of them is more intense than the other. It's possible to see it in his energy and even his body language, he seems so tense. He is easily shocked when I say I disagree with him on something and doesn't even question me on my point of view, but rather force me to obey him. I sense strong ego every day, and it's quite hard to work with him sometimes, hopefully, most of the time we are not directly interacting. I asked a question on a task recently, I already had an explanation before, but I needed more information. I thought someone would give me more information, but my manager told me that it's not elegant to have so many comments on a task. I said: "It's OK, they don't care". He answered: "Are you trying to defy me?". I was so confused. Finally, I didn't get any more information, he told me that the work is already here and that I don't have to reinvent the weel. I only needed to convert it to another technology. Main lesson: Stage blue is very insecure, easily reactive against critics, and always concerned about others opinions.

I'M SO GLAD I HAVE THE EDUCATION I HAVE Even though I followed a stage orange/green western education and it's imperfect, it's still better than the blue/orange education my colleagues have. I can easily see the differences in our everyday life, the limiting beliefs, and fears of people around me, and how to not fall into the same traps.

EXPERIENCING STAGE BLUE I grew up as a minority in a stage blue country called Mauritius. Was it bad? Not really, since the country is not a high-intensity stage blue, but more a medium/lower blue. I would say that maybe 60 - 70% is stage blue and most of the rest is above, and of course, it's possible to find lower stages. The political situation is stable, there's a low crime rate, no terrorism, no mass shooting, a good economic system, and good democracy. It's considered one of the most developed countries in Africa. ==> Read more about Mauritius here However, even though all of this seems very good, my interaction with people is still frustrating sometimes. I did all my education in the French system and I went to French private schools, so I had an orange/green education in a blue country. I was interacting with blue mostly in my family. After high school, I went to France and studied there for about two years. I experienced a lot of growth and I really felt liberated from many social constraints. I had the opportunity to stay in France and work there in a big tech company, however, it seems that I was too attached to my native country and I decided to go back. Once I got there, all the shit started to hit me, and I clearly saw the psychological gap. I also saw how I hated and was afraid of stage blue when I got a job in a stage blue company. I'm currently at the end of two years of ego backslash, after two years of progress in Europe.

Thank you! And thanks for your advice! I think it will be very interesting to go through my old posts after at least 6 months or 1 year.

I'm at work right now, I just had a bad experience with stage blue thinking, so I'm probably going to talk about stage blue pretty soon...

I don't know how this journal is going to be, I can be sometimes organized and sometimes very chaotic. I will try to keep things as simple as possible, the more important things are my psychological growth and the impact of my thoughts on me and others.

I still have some doubts...

@martins name Don't you think that some very well trained liars could fake it?

Yeah, I already watched this one. It inspired me to create my own commonplace book. Leo says that he just put raw randoms thoughts in his journal, this is a little light for me and I would like to have more informations from people who have a journal

I not sure if I'm going to do it, but I'm thinking about creating a self-actualization journal on this forum. I already have a personal journal in my commonplace book which I keep for myself, however, I'm not always very regular and sometimes don't write some important insights. Maybe putting everything online can motivate me. I've always been inspired by people who have nice written and structured journals and I'm not sure what's the best way to do it. I have many random thoughts throughout my days, but also some long term plans on which I should think more. Is it better to create a journal for all the random stuff who is going on in my head or a more specific one aligned on a big project (I have at least 3 - 4 big goals in my head)? Or both together? Having one journal is already challenging, I don't want to have a tentacular structure, but at the same time, I feel like I need to focus on long term goals. Also, if you have a journal on this forum, how do you deal with the risk of being recognized online?

I just want to share another tool that I'm using now, it's called Notion and it's awesome

Hello, I'm currently working as a web developer in a big company. I don't like all the bureaucracy, the rigidity, and the lack of independence. I think starting as a freelance would be an easy way to get into business. I want to mention that I'm not living in a first world country, so the companies here don't pay that much compared to europe or north america. I cannot ask for the local companies if they need some freelancers and getting high paid opportunities, I can only ask online. Is it easy to do? I consider myself as one of the most competent person in my company, some other workers also think the same.

No, but I have a GitHub account with some old projects. I also have a little more of 2 years of professional experience. I started computer programming when I was 15, and now I'm 22. Do you have some experience in the domain?

@Truth Addict The fact that the average salary is from £70 to £90 per month for a full time job and that you guys are here on this forum despite all the dogmatism and the political situation in your country literally blow my mind up. I never thought I would experience something like this in my life. Even if I don't live in a first world country, I'm paid more than you and still have trouble getting all my shit together. All of this is fucking incredible.

I'm currently amazed that you can communicate with us in your situation. The 21st century is really one of the most incredible era ever

I actually did it, and everything went like shit! I had to relearn the basis of relationships due to a cultural gap, and it also helped me be more adaptable, conscious and open-minded on other cultures.

Only programmer nerds can understand this :

You sounds like Leo... and yes, all of these are good advices Brutally changing a cultural environment also helps in better understanding the basis as it push us to be more adaptable. Which stages would you classify yourself in? Depends of the perspective, in a sense it's a success as most enlightened people had to work really hard to obtain that. In another sense, it's just nothing ...

I don't like when people ask me to do things outside school/work with them. The typical scenario is the following: I'm with another person or in a group at school/work, I enjoy my time with them and they also enjoy it. Then, someone asks if I want to join them one day for an activity and I'm like: "Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!" I have some social anxiety, and yes these propositions are opportunities for growth. However, it's not hugely handicapping me in my daily life. It's OK at work, I don't have any difficulties to say when I don't agree on some things and I'm really proactive. But, I don't really like to share my personal life. I don't like when my days of solitude are taken, I always feel I have better things to do when I'm alone by myself. I see these people almost everyday day, so why not having some days off? I feel freer when I'm alone. When we invite me I feel like someone catches me by force and that it's not OK to say refuse.

I also have this concern. How do you handle it? I literally never had close friends during my entire life because I was so shy and introverted in the past. I would qualify most people I had social interaction with as acquaintances, and some of them friends. Outside of school/work, I had very few times where I would hang out with other people (These quotes boxes are really terrible)

I still feel like there's a little of social anxiety going on inside me. @Serotoninluv What if the same person asks for it multiple times? I think of one person who seems to be interesting and could become a great friend, however, I always feel like I need to focus on myself and be alone.

This one is really awesome

No more than these ones? I'm not sure and I'm not enlightened or highly spiritual. I am only supposing that an infinite amout of realities exists