• Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Pernani

  1. Yes I have experienced this a lot, even having an orgasm while meditating. Sexual arousal is just energy passing through your body so yes you could call it that.
  2. I'm still trying to understand the meaning of that scene in Fight Club, anyone care to shed some light?
  3. I'm interested in figuring out how one can fall in love in a romantic relationship, establish a deep intimate connection with all the vulnerability that's required from that, and not suffer from the neediness or emotional attachment that may result from that? I'm asking because I've recently been into a relationship that was very loving and nurturing for a few years, only for it to end with me getting very emotionally attached and the immense amount of pain that comes from that. I think it was a growing experience, but it also seemed like the more vulnerable you allow yourself to be with someone to create a genuine loving connection, the more you set yourself for actually sabotaging the relationship or just experiencing a terrible heatbreak because life had a different say in the matter. Any thoughts or videos are appreciates (:
  4. @Vadiminator Hope you're doing well in there..
  5. Thanks for your input! From my experience, it's almost rare to find someone you're so compatible with, with which you can develop a deep intimate connection. And even developing that connection is a process that takes time. So how would one go about creating abundance in reality when it comes to that? Cause it's not the same as just going out and hooking up with different people (which I admit, I haven't even tried doing that yet). Or maybe this perceived "rarity" is coming from a scarcity mindset itself.. What do u think? That's very interesting.. Basically doing your best to just love for love's sake, without creating an identity out of it. What does it take to be able to do that? So you're saying if one is "full", they wouldn't want an intimate relationship in the first place. What does "full" mean here? Enlightened? Unconditionally self loving? In my experience, I get very averted to drama (especially when I notice it in myself). I care more about a genuine connection, I find there's something beautiful in that. But I like how you said "nothing reveals your ego more than intimate relationship", cause I find that very true from my experience too. I feel like I'm failing at connecting the dots somewhere lol Can you elaborate please?
  6. Idk which practice to stick with. I am tempted to try to master them both but I don't have enough time for that. Basically for 2 years I've been trying different kinds of meditation techniques. They all worked but they all had different effects. So I never actually stuck to one technique that I tried to master, because every technique has a different edge, and if I stick to one then I'd kinda be missing out the benefits of another. And then I started practicing hatha yoga along with kriya yoga. And that felt amazing. But its effects were also very different from those that come with meditation. So basically from my experience, the benefits that came with meditation is that I actually felt like I was growing. In one year of practice, my mindset changed a lot. I was getting bombarded with insights during the sessions and outside of them. Felt more relaxed, detached from my ego and my emotions. But it sometimes made me lethargic, depressed and unmotivated. Kriya, in a nutshell, felt awesome! My body felt good and my mind got sharper. Everytime I did breathing techniques, it was like charging myself with life. I felt good, energetic, healthy and strong. I was purging my emotional system from old baggage, and it was easier to connect to life on an emotional level. But ironically, because of that, it felt like some of its effects are opposite to what meditation does to u. It seemed like my ego and its emotional reactions got stronger, in the sense that there was less distance between them and my awareness. Backlashes were stronger, and transcendental insights weren't as common as before, so I wasn't getting the sense of "growing" or that my mindset was changing like I did before. Now I'm back to actually trying to master meditation by following a book called "Mastering the Core Teachings of the Buddha", but it's not going very well since I've been struggling to pass the threshold of getting good with concentration practice for a few months now. I get that this post is kinda all over the place, but I wanna know if you felt these differences in your own experience, how you reconciliated them, and generally anything that would help me choose a practice to stick with and try to master. Thank you 🙏
  7. I totally get what you're getting at. Though I have to ask you, were you able to achieve this sort of happiness by letting go of everything and accepting it all?
  8. Thank you so much for your input. I feel like some teachers can definitely over-complicate Kriya, while some others recommend a more simpler basic set of practices (like Santata Gamana with his first book). Didn't you experience any benefits to doing yoga that you didn't find in your meditation practice? @The0Self @PenguinPablo Thank you for the recommendation. I'm definitely checking out TMI first, then I'll see about the second book. Don't you think that one can only reach to that conclusion in their direct experience after lots n lots of practice? Otherwise I'd just end up wasting my time like I've already been for the majority of my life. Thank you for sharing your experiences, you seem to be floating on cloud 9 with your kriya practice. Have you tried classic meditation before committing to kriya yoga? If so then what made you decide on which practice to pursue?
  9. The mind illuminated has been mentioned twice in this thread so far. Definitely gonna check it out. I'm pretty much struggling with getting further in MCTB. I just want to be genuinely happy, excited about life while living it in a fulfilling way. Also at this stage I'm still struggling with getting my survival handled and all the fears that come from that. I never actually practiced self inquiry seriously, bec enlightenment wasn't a goal I was focusing on. It just spontaneously arose during my meditations sometimes. What was your experience with kriya like? And what are these results that u felt lacking? I'd also love to hear about everyone's experience with Kriya and Meditation, from those that tried to get a taste of both only to decide on seriously pursuing the former or the latter.
  10. Don't give up man! Use the options that have already been presented in this thread. You haven't done anything irreversible and you're not alone. You probably think you're alone because you're not familiar with this domain you found yourself in, but you're not alone. People have gone through similar painful periods and experiences, so don't lose hope. Think of it as a trial, and that when you pass it something great will happen and your life will be a hundred times better than your previous normal life. Because what you've accessed here is something rare and extraordinary yet very very powerful. And if you don't know how to harness its power, it may very well turn against you. But I believe you can, and you will, because as unbelievable as it sounds, many before you have re-emerged stronger from the overwhelming suffering. Just keep in mind that there is something beautiful awaiting for you beyond the suffering, so keep looking help from experts and don't lose hope! No matter how horrible or definitive your suffering may seem, it is temporary and it is fixable! You just need to find the right people to help you.
  11. Meditation music Anthem of the end of the world
  12. So u exhaust yourself b4 doing the breathing? Do you focus on breathing in the belly or raising your chest?
  13. I hope you find this talk (and his book: Lsd and the mind of universe) as inspiring as I have.
  14. Love it, thank you!
  15. I've been doing this technique recently to ourge through some emotional pains I've been suffering from a breakup. I know it may not work that way but I thought that since I was more vulnerable, the sessions will be more emotionally charged and intense. But I hardly felt much, even after doing it for like 40 mins. Before, after about 10min of breathing, all my body would twist, vibrate and even sweat a lot. But recently I just don't feel much happening.. I thought that maybe sth was wrong with my breathing pattern? What breathing pattern works best for u guys? Like how deep do you breathe (belly/chest/neck deep) and what's the rhythm?
  16. Wow this seems pretty good! Do they just accept anyone who wants to participate?
  17. You should check out his book, the dude has been through hell and back so yeah.. Balls of steel. @okulele it is.. I would like to know what you think about his vision of the future human
  18. Instead of making another thread, I wanna put a question here that relates to the topic. We know that SD has many lines of development, among which there's the cognitive line of development. Do the 9 ego stages pertain to only the cognitive line of development? What about other lines like: Moral, Emotional, Career and livelihood... ? And doesn't cognitive development seep into almost all other lines, thus evolving them as it evolves?
  19. I just made this today, hope y'all like it! hahaha
  20. If you feel awe and wonder whenever you look at the night sky this is for you! There's some reductionist materialism especially in the second video, but if you can look past that I'm sure you will enjoy these just like I did (:
  21. Glad you enjoyed it @Zigzag Idiot @Matt23 @outlandish
  22. I found this video to be fascinating, this whole talk makes my heart crave that feeling of beauty and wonder, if anyone has resources (books, videos..) that focus abt the topic of beauty and assimilating it more in your daily life specifically, please share them with me and with everyone here.
  23. Wow definitely will check it out, what makes him have such a keen eye for beauty?