Basman

Sounds like unhealthy perfectionism to me. I recommend you read up on the concept of wabi-sabi.

I don't know if it matters, but she might have autism. Gender dysphoria and non-binariness corelates positively with being on the spectrum.

A great speech. Joshua Graham is a rare steel man of mormonism.

@Jannes sure, sentience, while still inherently biased to a degree, is less biased than relatibility or ecology. It is limited though in the sense that every living creature is technically sentient and when you posit questions where have to choice between a whale or 800000 shrimp for example, then measuring sentience can fail to lead you to any meaningful solutions. Though it still matters and informs our thinking. You can try and measure to which degree an animal is sentient and from there prioritize the most sentient animals. For example, mammals are considered more sentient than bugs, who are considered more sentient than plants. You'll pull a weed without second thought, but a bug you'll maybe feel atleast a little sorry for stepping on. Considering sentience is not a stance of direct action perce but of observation IMO.

I think the question of ethicacy relative to killing animal is somewhat relative and depends a lot on the human bias towards relatibility. We are mammals and we relate to and find other mammals cute. Insects and gastropods less so. If wolves looked like cockroaches, there would be a lot less people protesting wolf hunting. You are going to feel stronger about killing a whale than 800000 shrimps on an emotional level. But you could take a purely ecological approach instead, where you measure the importance of the animal to the food chain. Shrimp are lower down the food chain and are an important source of food for a wide range of animals. Depriving the ocean of 800000 shrimp would mean 800000 shrimp less in the bellies of starving sea animals. You could say the same about the whale since there are many animals that live of whale meat but shrimp are more fundamental in the food chain.

Cheating is only a problem if your partner has an issue with it, which is true for most relationships I think. That said, if I had the dream girl, I wouldn't want to cheat on her. I like sticking to one. If you can get all of your needs met through this one person, why wander?

@Something Funny I believe it is fundamentally a need to be enjoyed as a person that is amiss here. Parents usually fulfill this need for their children when they play with them, talk with them leisurely or simply spend quality time with them. The experience of joy derived from your mere existance. It is hard to get that as adult the same way unfortunately. It is something you gotta learn to cultivate yourself somehow. I can relate to the pain of feeling like nobody enjoys you for who you are and that you have that you have to grind just to get what you want, however. It is not helpful thought to whish you had it easier. Girls might have it easier one way but they also fundamentally have different needs and insecurities which don't apply to you the same way (and which you probably don't want). Just keep it rolling. Do things you find meaningful and makes you happier as a person. Just keep in mind that your brain still growing. Trust me, as you inch closer to 25, you will suddenly feel a lot more level headed.

We operate on a social-contract of preserving the lives of societies members. The legal right to your life extends to babies, regardless of their ability to understand that. That is the simple reason why infanticide isn't acceptable. As soon the kid is out the womb, there's no room for doubt about its personhood. That's a person and its far too late for an abortion. Even if there was legal juristiction to kill newborns with certain health issues or genetic defects, who exactly decides what is just or not? It's inherently subjective, therefor it is better to have the standard operating procedure of preserving life for its own sake as a standard operating procedure. Everybody has a chance of happiness in some way. Also, cutting cost arguments can be a slippery slope, since it is easy to overstate the cost of anything that you don't care about.

I really enjoyed the recent happiness video. It was quiet illuminating and made me reflect on how I lead my own life in terms of my goals and activities. However, one thing that I miss are the attached work sheets. They helped out with integrating the knowledge with my own experience. It made it much easier to work with these topics than having to try and find the exact moment where certains questions are made in a 2+ hour long video. Are worksheets ever coming back?

Most people behave just fine and you never notice. It's only when people are being inconvinient that they stick out. Same with stupid people on the internet. They represent a vocal minority. The majority of internet users never leave comments on anything. About 10% of Twitter users generate over 80% percent of all tweets, just to illustrate. I think being understanding can go a long way if you care about changing your perspective around "idiots". It is generally due to ignorance and a lack of education that people behave stupidly. They're imperfect people in an imperfect world. I can't fault you though for feeling annoyed at stupid people. Just don't let it get to you. Maybe you just need a vacation.

Most human suffering is due to a lack of resources. Raising the standard of living would help people become more spiritually attuned if anything. Its worth considering that people who attain a sense of awakening from suffering or just in general might have a predispotion towards spiritual growth. To what degree does genetics play a role for example? There's no guarantee that suffering will awaken anyone (which it tends not to IMO). Addiction to suffering, or negative emotion, is a documented phenomena. In short, it's a cyclical pattern of thinking and interpreting through the lens of a past trauma. That cycle is maintained by fear and uncertainty of your ability to handle something outside that lens. Suffering in this sense can breed familiarity, which is itself comforting if you're particularily fearful of the outside world. The tragic part of an addiction to suffering is that it keeps you away from the kind of positive experiences you want. A lifetime of trauma will wreck your trust of the world.

I agree that women are on average are more attracted to lean athletic bodies over "the rock" tier muscles. It's more about definition, especially in the upper body (broad shoulders) and fat percentage. That is a much more realistically obtainable physique for the average guy compared to something like the Athlean X "super hero" physique. Also, in self defence grappling can be effective if going up against a single opponent but has the issue of leaving you open to attack from others. It's generally always better to escape, so techniques that give you an opening to escape are the best IMO. When I practiced Wing Tsun many years ago, there where certain techniques that allowed you to escape a grab and push your opponent away in one motion.

There's always a party in Amsterdam especially during the weekend. Besides the open sex trade, a significant amount of the people in the centrum area are themselves tourists and just looking for some fun. However, accomodation close to centrum can be very expensive. Most tourists find accomadation in the southern area of Amsterdam and take the metro into town.

I agree that Leo's style of speaking can come off as arrogant and confrontational and that he's generally a bit informal. It has its ups and downs. On the one hand, it dramatizes his topics to a certain degree which makes them more interesting and allows him to better convey their seriousness. On the other, it can be a bit too much at times and engender judgementalism. He speaks in length about how he can come off to others, his arrogance among others, in this video: It's pretty eye opening as someone who's been watching his content for years and no doubt been affected by him on a personal level. Definitely made me consider more how I treat the information I consume on a critical level.

@Leo Gura I don't mind it. I kinda like that it is that way actually. It makes me feel more free somehow. It's morbin time.

Occassionally I get this sense of detachement from myself, usually when in bed, that reality is inherently strange. I get this creeping sense that there is some "lie" to life that goes beyound society or human existence. I get this sense that fundamentally, nothing about this reality is a given. For example that we need air to breath or that gravity works the way that it does. That we as humans are a particular way and not another. That I am me specifically and not Abu Hajar from Pakistan. Its like reality is fundamentally arbitrary. I hope that makes sense. The "rules" that fundamentally underly material reality and shape it is what I'm trying to point at. Like how gravity is an extension of certain principles that govern reality, which have a knock-on effect that influences geography and climate and the subsequent animals that adapt to the environment (I.E. our life). Why are those principles not another way? Why are those "principles" the way that they are? Who died and made them the boss? To a certain degree, you can explain reality as a consequence of a prior event. For example, humans have five fingers because we used to be lizards that had 5 fingers. Those lizard fingers used to be fish fins, an adaption to a water climate. There's water on the Earth because of planetesimals, and you could go on like that till the supposed formation of the universe. Like that, you could theoretically map out explanations for everything in order of importance of leading events that cause subsequent phenomena. But you can only work your explanations "backwards" up to a certain point. The Big Bang Theory is practically merely faith if taken as gospel and doesn't "tie" the loose end (also, mid show). That being why reality is one way and not another? Or alternatively, what is reality? All of those explanations are inherently backpedaling the fundamental question of where it all started and how exactly "that" works and why it works the way it does? You could make a distinction between "mundane" material reality and extraordinary reality. "Mundane" reality being material, comparatively easily explainable ordered phenomena but which is inherently arbitrary on a fundamental level. Extraordinary reality being the part of reality that is inherently indivisible and unexplainable (Why is reality one way and not the other?). Now, I forsee the obvious "god"/"dream" comments coming. However, I find those explanations too easy and disingenious if you don't somehow break down what that actually means and how you came to that conclusion. Those are very loaded term that can simply come of as commands to believe rather than earnest explanations. I'd like to see earnest replies if you intent to engage. My main issues: Why is reality one way and not another? Why can't it be another way? Where in reality can you locate the "fundament" of reality and how does it connect with reality on a wider scale? Why am I experiencing life from the perspective of this particular human and not the perspective of another human or animal? Why am I me fundamentally? Why am I a human and not say an attack helicopter? Thank you if you read this far.

@Osaid I agree that there is an overarching degree of interpretation when it comes to trying to understanding reality. That is inevitable. Though I find your logic a bit too broad and hard to follow. @Leo Gura By that, do you mean it is not possible to understand what reality is normally for humans? If so, doesn't that make reality inherently unknowable to a degree? From the last couple of days sitting with this stuff, I feel a sense that reality simply can't be fully understood and that it is inherently mysterious to a certain degree. Atleast from my point of view currently. It's not like not understanding a certain type of science. Fundamental reality is much more pertinent to my direct experience. Becoming clear that I don't know what reality is is in of itself kind off clarifying to me.

@Rishabh R First rule: we don't talk about Actualized. Second rule...

@Ayham If I was you I'd start with what exactly you are getting from these practices concretely in your own experience. The more specific you can be in what it does for you, the better a case you will have for yourself. If these practices turn out to in fact not be doing anything of meaning, then what's the point? Relative to criticism, honestly why do you care? You don't need to deeply analyze a critic in order gauge whether or not it's constructive. Don't overcomplicate things. Have some faith in your own ability to know what is right for you.

Women have a lot more to gain from being more sexually selective than men. Hitting on guys as an attractive women is pick-up on easy mode.

Used to have a cringy obsession with listening to Manson music when I was a teen, so I have some thought about the guy. Relative to personal development, Marilyn Manson very much carries the personality of an artist. I think he is likely quiet self-aware listening to his interviews and podcasts. It is hard to say what he really is like without getting creepy because Marilyn Manson is such a stage persona, divorced from his day-to-day self. I don't feel like he is meant to be taken completely seriously, but more as a commentary and an artistic self-expression in of itself. But he does somewhat betray his age when you look at his works today. especially his older stuff. Manson is very much a product of his time. His misceant and macabre style clearly reflects his dueling with the originally protestant culture that he comes from and that was more prevalent in the 70s and 80s. Playing with the macabre especially juxtaposes what is normally expected and creates a space where a sort of genuineness can be explored. Or just flips things on their head. My favorite album is Pale Emperor.

If I was you, I'd start by making clear and concisely what exactly your hang-ups are and format your text. Reading of what you've written, it sounds like you struggle with: Perfectionism around habits. A sense of meaninglessness. Simplistic, black and white thinking tendencies. It's hard for me to read clearly what exactly you are trying to communicate when you aren't very clear and concise about what exactly you need. But trying anyway (and based on the title), I wonder if you simply lack experience. In my own experience, the sense of going in circles comes from when I try too hard to create results without clearly defining goal as well as actionable steps. Just blindly following a sense of "self-improvement". It's easy to get lost in the sauce. For me, developing my critical thinking skills has been an important part in making me feel less ridicolous as a person. That involves weighing the efficacy of things, truth, biases and the relativity that comes with the complexity of life. It requires an openness to learning and an awareness of ones own tendencies to want to jump to a conclusion. It allows me to better process how I think and more accuratelly assess the information I'm inundated with. I hold a habit of questioning the information and ideas I'm presented with instead of simply believing or not believing. For example with Leo, I take most of his content with a grain of salt and I don't (or atleast try) to not complicity just accept all that he says. This approach makes me an active participant of my world view. This in turn allows me to act in a way that is more integritous to me. I help myself by thinking for myself.

There's no way to avoid feeling bad when things don't go your way, on some level. That's human nature. Feeling rejected is perfectly normal. Best you can do is learn to deal with it. Not take it so personally. You can learn from a rejection, so it's not a purely negative experience necessarily. A lost opportunity can lead to a different path that ends up being right for you. Like a girl you crushed on rejected you but you grew your relationship with the boys as a consequence. Failure can grow you as a person. Even if we could, we shouldn't strive to eliminate everything that feels bad in life. It's an important part of what makes us human.

You definitely should avoid overdoing it. Writing, that is. But it is quiet helpful to process conscious thinking, in my experience.

I don't know how involved you are as a guardian, but perhaps you could speak with the school if you have some legit concerns (parent-teacher meetings, etc). I don't know about teachers neglecting traditional gender roles over neoliberal "build-a-bear" gender constructs. I feel like that is easy to take out of context and blow out of proportion without any evidence. Maybe talk with your sis if you are concerned about how she feels. What her perspective is. Kids doing edgy stuff isn't anything new though. They don't really understand what they are doing, just that it goes a bit against the grain. They understand when they are being edgy by the reactions of their peers and adults. I believe edgyness is stimulating to still developing people because it lets them explore the complexities of life (not just the safe and approved facets). I remember when I was a kid, back in 7th grade (Ca. early 2010s) we had a talent competition at school where the kids would go in groups and arrange a piece to show off to their parents and classmates. I kid you not, the last piece was a bunch of girls just straight up twerking at a 100+ people, most of them parents. That shit's messed up. Kids are weird.