Jordan

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Posts posted by Jordan


  1. I plugged around 30mg of 5-MEO DMT today around 5 hours ago. My last trip was in January around 8 months ago. I have been meditating a bit on and off this year not being super serious in my spiritual practices. I would like to start a habit of 30-60 min meditation 2x per day. I would also like to start working out regularly again. I remember I got a small injury and stopped but didn't start up again.

    During my 5-MEO trip, I sat down cross-legged on a pillow on my bed most of the time. 30 min felt like 2 hours. I spend a similar amount of time eyes closed and open. I looked around the room. Most shapes and colors looked pretty normal but it was still a very different experience than normal waking consciousness. At one point I looked down at my feet and the shaped did seem to blend together and it felt like I was being absorbed into them. I felt pretty relaxed.  

    I realized that it would be a good idea to take more interest in understanding people better and allowing them to feel understood. I had a strong desire to really deeply know about different topics that came up in my mind like work and my relationships. There seems to be a lot of value I am missing by just knowing superficial things about everything and not understanding deeper. I noticed many areas in my life where I don't have all the information and I was just making assumptions but it would be easy to have a clearer picture by taking an interest and asking questions. I looked at my body and decided it is important to know as much about keeping good care of it as possible. I should be doing my own experiments to see what makes my body as healthy and strong as possible. 


  2. I was never interested in reincarnation because it seemed pointless to me. Is it really "you" that is reincarnating if you don't have your memories or anything to do with your personality carried through? I did watch most of the first Bashar video linked above and I think it would be interesting being able to get information from outside consciousnesses telepathically but I don't like reincarnation as a way of conceptualizing it.


  3. On 8/20/2023 at 11:16 PM, Osaid said:

    Just ask yourself:

    What is more intelligent? Love or hate?

    If you answered love, now ask:

    Am I willing to abandon all my logic and reasons about hating myself, just to love myself for no reason?

    If not, then how is it that you logically concluded that love is more intelligent, but now your logic and thoughts about yourself are saying the opposite? Where is the discrepancy?

    Perhaps self-hate is illogical? Maybe love can't be found in reason or logic? Maybe love is a higher intelligence than logic and reason?

    What happens if all your reasons about why you should hate yourself just vanished? Where does the hate go? What is left over?
     

    Now, have YOU ever existed inside of logic and reason? Are you made of reasons and judgments ABOUT yourself? Or perhaps there is a more fundamental existence to you, which has no problem accepting you and loving you as you are?

     

    Wow I almost started crying with joy/love reading the part about loving myself for no reason. I am at work though so I guess I should wait until I am in private to meditate on that. 


  4. Why do you think that awakening is the end of desire? I understand awakening as being extremely aware of the direct experience while accepting everything as it is. Even if desire or resistance is being experienced, it is completely accepted as pure goodness, love and truth. The concept of a separate self is seen as an illusion so the nature of desire will change but there will not be an end of all desire.


  5. I find it more compelling if you are actually disagreeing with something concrete that people have actually said and show the context. Who is saying that raping babies is fine? I think people would say there is no good or bad and saying that something like that is bad is not being truthful. Saying that it is fine is also not being truthful either. Trying to be kind and helpful to manipulate people into liking you is kind of not the most loving or skillful way to live either. There has to be more context otherwise you can prove anyone wrong.


  6. I lost my virginity at age 23 and thought I knew exactly what sex would be like but it really was much different than I thought. It is a bit hard to describe but the physical sensations are much different and you won't be able to just watch porn and imagine the sensations in the same way. I can get stronger orgasms from porn but I have a much better overall experience having sex. The emotions from being intimate and connecting with someone else that come up are different than you will experience from porn.

    Ohh I think you asked if what you see in porn is how people actually have sex. I am not sure how people have sex but for the sex I have, it is much different. It looks really stupid to me how people have sex in porn but it shows an angle that makes the girl look good. The sex I have is much better than the sex pornstars are having and I don't do anything crazy. It is about the connection you have with your partner.


  7. Something I have been doing for many years is when I notice I am getting stressed, I take one slow deep breath inhaling faster than exhaling. Then I notice the difference between how i was feeling before and after the breath. It puts me in a much better mood \throughout the day. when meditating I like to take slow deep breaths and sit there after exhaling holding my breath so I can focus better with less noise, movement and pressure. 


  8. On 6/14/2023 at 6:47 AM, kylan11 said:

    You might wanna look into habit formation theory.

    I would advise against this. It's too much, too fast. I guarantee you will quickly lose motivation, burnout, and revert to your old habits.

    Start slow. I suggest as little as 5 minutes a day. After a while, once you genuinely feel the desire to spend more time meditating, gradually and slowly increase your time. Begin with increments of 5 minutes. Eventually you'll get there and the habit will stick.

    I like the method of going all out doing one thing while dropping everything else then dialing it back to start a habit. Emotionally it just seems so lame doing 5 min per day or something like that. It makes me not want to even start. I think the main problem for me is the time I spend on video games / porn. I need to cut down super non productive time and I think it will help a lot. 

    I didn't end up meditating for more than around an hour at most per day these last few days. I have been working overtime and on my phone game too much. I will make my attempt again tomorrow but I do have some errands to run tomorrow morning so I'll see if I have the energy to meditate before that. 


  9. @Yimpa When I meditate doing mantra meditation on Bama Nam Kevalam, I get vivid dreams almost every night. I seem to need to sleep less. I found sex 10x better doing mindfulness meditation 1 hour a day for 100 days several years ago. the effects fade after stopping. I keep falling off track. I will see if I can stick with it. I have been pretty good about meditating every day for the last week or 2. 


  10. Hello, I watched the video. I was just thinking of starting meditating 3 hours a day because I am annoyed at myself for spending too much time playing videogames. It is sort of like a punishment for myself haha. I have not sat more than 1.5 hours before. I did not decide if I will take a short break every hour or just try sitting without a break like you did. I will start tomorrow morning and see how it goes. 

    Did you get any changes in your sleep quality or memory or other unexpected changes? I might have missed where you mentioned these things. Did it help in the ways you were hoping with your working memory?


  11. Before when I was doing mindfulness with labeling 1 hour per day for 100 days I had something like that intermittedly. It is the same method Leo describes in his mindfulness meditation video. I started intermittedly getting extremely vivid imaginations just like dreaming but still being awake. It would sometimes happen when I was not meditating. I have not been meditating much recently so I lost the ability but it seemed to be mostly from mindfulness meditation with labeling technique and not other meditations I have experimented with. The part that seems to help is just labeling see hear or feel then spending the next 2 breaths giving all your effort into seeing, feeling or hearing what you are focusing on with as much clarity as possible. Just talking about it makes me want to get into doing that technique again regularly. 


  12. 5 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

    1) Guys get friendzoned because they haven't learned game. Once you learn game you will never be friendzoned.

    2) It is possible for a guy to have girls as friends, but only if he has a girlfriend, not as some thirsty Incel.

    This hasn't been my experience. I have no interest in having female friends unless I don't have a girlfriend. If a girl likes you a lot as a friend then she will help you get a girlfriend. It is very useful to have at least one female friend if you don't have a girlfriend.

    I had a very close female friend when I was around 20 and a virgin and had no girlfriend. I really enjoyed the time I spent with her. I didn't really want to have sex with her but was still open to it and she made it clear she just wanted to be friends. She would hang out with me and invite her girl friends along. Her friends often seemed to think I was cute. I am pretty sure she talked me up to them when I wasn't around. She moved back to Colombia and I haven't seen her in over 10 years but if we got back together I think we would go back to being close friends as long as it doesn't make our partners jealous. 

    I think it worked with me because I find it a super turn off if a girl does not find me really sexy. I really have no interest in woman that I think don't like me in that way. 

    The female friend I had, I would prefer to not have sex with her but I would probably do it if I was single and she really needed it because her heart was broken or something but make it clear we will go back to being just friends after she gets better. I am pretty sure that still counts as just being friends. 

    Now I have a girlfriend that I have been with for 10 years. I find her sexier than anyone else. I have sex 1-3x a week with her still after 10 years and have no interest in being friends with or having fun with other girls. 

    If something happened and I became single again and ready to date again, I probably would try to increase my social circle making several good female friends that we make it clear we don't want to have sex with until I found a girlfriend with their help.


  13. Which Buddhist practices are designed to still or shut off the mind? Vipassana or focusing on one point? I think the meditation I have done has not decreased my thinking, I am just more aware of when I am repeating thought patterns and realize when it is unnecessary and start focusing on another topic. You think more about what you are thinking about. I have not noticed any memory troubles. I think it improves memory a bit for me. You are able to see you memories more clearly. I usually do mindfulness with labeling after focusing on one point but try out many types like vipassana, strong determination sitting, do nothing, fire Kasina, mantra. 


  14. Work is great. You trade 40 hours a week for food, shelter, safety and freedom to do as you wish with in the rest of your time with some money left over. Having police, free school grade K-12, roads, bridges, firefighters, trains, community centers, busses, an army requires taxes in some form. You need to contribute to get these things in return. Do you see an example of a better culture that does not require people to work?

    If you can't stand working where you work then find another job you find more interesting. I found after meditating a lot, I enjoy my work a lot more. I also appreciate money a lot more after working some overtime and know the value of it for me.


  15. From my experience with around 15 trips it seems to be a temporary change in your consciousness. I have heard someone claim that after taking it daily for 30 days it has had a permanent effect but other people that tried 30 days in a row had some negative side effects. The consciousness carry over effects from meditation are much more obvious than 5MEO Dmt. You do get many insights on it though.


  16. Are you getting any noticeable benefit from your mind being silent? Does it seem like your consciousness has changed? Increasing your ability to notice things like your thoughts and emotions, increasing sensory clarity, improving your ability to focus are all things that may be pointing to moving in the right direction. I think it might help with your concentration doing what you are describing.


  17. Listen to "mindfulness in plain english" an audiobook on youtube on 2x speed while paying attention to it. Sit down and put your attention to the sensation at the tip of your nostrils. When your attention moves, notice that it has moved as soon as possible, take a few seconds to notice what it has moved to then move it back to your nostrils. Do this for 12-16 hours a day for a week or 2. 

     

     

     

     

     

     

     


  18. I was listening to this in the background and he talks about cannibalism and head hunting to be hard to explain to western people. He said that they will eat the human liver or the heart and in some cases use their skill as a pillow to obsorb their energy. I have a feeling part of his decision to look like that is to prove he is fully committed to the tribe and won't be a likely sacrifice haha.