mr_engineer

@Someone here What do you study?

Have you done it in the past? If yes, why did you stop?

No, that's way too tough. Just start by working a shitty job 12 hours/day without complaining about how hard your life is. It's not technically 'unsafe', it's just hard. If you can do this, you can do anything.

It's less comfortable, it's less pleasurable. But, when you do that, what you're doing is you're not chasing immediate pleasure/comfort like a boy, you're 'manning up' to your life-situation, you're facing reality and you're doing something about it, you're not passive to it. You're being less of an emotionally reactive actor and you're being more of a rational and logical actor, you're being more stoic and centered in a potentially chaotic/unstable situation. This is step 1 to becoming a leader, essentially. It's the #1 quality you need to be a leader.

You need to reclaim your male aggression. If you're not being aggressive, your life probably isn't going well. You're probably procrastinating on important tasks. So, what you have to do is to make a to-do list and get it all done. And when you reap the rewards of it, recognize that these are the results of your efforts. That's 'taking responsibility'. Not having some 'accountability partner' berate you for where you are in life and tell you that it's your fault. Then, you can challenge yourself to take on bigger and bigger challenges.

First of all, if you believe that 'height is everything', it doesn't serve you. You will fail if you believe that. Secondly, its not true. Just having physical strength can compensate for it. And, if you want a hot woman, you should be physically fit. Otherwise, you won't be able to beat the competition. You've done it once, you can do it again. You just have to be genuinely motivated, you can't fake it. I don't know why you lost motivation on your health-journey. Because there are literally zero downsides to caring about your health. So, you must find out why you lost motivation and deal with that reason, get that motivation back.

That's why you gotta be ripped yourself. If you're ripped and you have a health-conscious personality, you can get with them very easily. You'll struggle if you don't look that good yourself and you aren't health-conscious yourself. Then you'll come across as weird to them. Start a yoga-class and partner up with someone with good business-acumen, then. Health-conscious businesses will be booming anyways.

With people-pleasers, you have one of two options. Either be a totally controlling narcissist who has zero feelings for her and who doesn't give a fuck about her. If she gives you BS, you tell her to shut up, you act abusive towards her. She'll placate you if you do that. Or, you say 'I'm not interested' and get the fuck away from her. If you date in a responsible way, where you allow her to express herself and you treat her with respect, she will stab you in the back. Because they have a lot of repressed anger for when they failed to stand up for themselves, so it'll come out on you. And don't even try to read the body-language/'signs'. This opens the door wide open for chameleon-like behavior on their part, which will hurt you in the future.

So you're telling me that if you're ripped and you go to a popular gym where all the hot Instagram-models hang out, you can't get with one of them? You know how hot yoga-instructors are, right?! Just go to a yoga-class and hit on women! (If you're ripped yourself)

@Emotionalmosquito What happened? Why did you get out of shape?

How physically fit are you? The more physically fit you are, the more you'll be able to do. Then, you will not bitch out of options in which you have to potentially work hard, you will work hard. Also, you will look better, helping you in dating. Cuz the reality is that in big cities, you will be competing against a lot of ripped guys. P.S. About the point on 'skills' - it takes a lot of hard work to build them. It is a grind. If you feel like it's too hard for you, I think you need to work on your physical fitness.

@universe I think we need to have a conversation about red-flags in women who could potentially falsely accuse you. Because, as important as it is to go and approach women, you also have to protect yourself from the bad ones. It's like saying 'yes, you gotta eat if you're hungry, but you shouldn't eat something that is poisoned, no matter how hungry you are'. One big one is people-pleasing. Where they say 'yes' when they mean 'no', then they regret sleeping with you, they blame you for it and falsely accuse you. Another one is that she's a feminist who hates men. If she's a feminist, she believes that 'men are inherently privileged', so, in her mind, she can justify ruining a man's life just for the heck of it. You have to watch out for these red-flags in your dating-life/when you approach women.

Of course, practically, you don't want to end up homeless. The thing, though, is that the fear of ending up homeless is something that prevents a lot of 9-5'ers from taking the leap of faith. They are so attached to security that no matter how much potential they see in their business, they will never quit their jobs, because 'security'. And 'if I screw it up, I end up homeless'. This fear is an issue of mental fitness and this would be something to work towards, as an entrepreneur. Let's say it's been a couple of years since you quit your job, you're doing alright in your business, and COVID strikes. And your business goes to shit. What will you do? Will you go back to working a job, cuz 'you gotta eat'? Or, will you be creative and do something else as an entrepreneur?

@universe So, you support women pressing charges on men for saving their lives? If you support the scapegoating of innocent men, by all means, lock this thread and silence us. First, you silence us, then you say that 'the percentage of false accusations is small'. Yeah, because you're silencing the falsely accused! Do you see the intellectual dishonesty in that?!

When you interact with any woman, figure out whether she's a feminist or a normal woman. If she's a feminist, don't help her. Give her the 'equality' that she's fighting you for. If she's a normal woman, do help her. And err on the side of caution, because authority-figures will not give you the benefit of the doubt. It's the same advice I'd give to a woman who's anxious about particular guys being 'potentially unsafe'. You have to figure out whether he actually is unsafe or not. If he is unsafe, avoid him/block him. If he's not, go to therapy. Today's feminism is a cynical, anti-male ideology and the type of women who gravitate towards it are women who have no self-worth when it comes to 'being worthy of men's protectiveness'. The 'independence'/'equality' talk is a cope for these self-worth issues. So, if you don't help them, it's not your failure to 'be a gentleman', it's their failure to be receptive to your help. Their self-worth issues are what they will actualize, when they actively hate on the gentleman. And, to be fair, their cynicism should disqualify them in your eyes anyways.

You have to guide them up the Spiral. They will not care about enlightenment until they start to really suffer due to the excesses of Stage Orange, until they become well-accomplished in at least one area of life.

I suffered from Oneitis when I was 13-14 years old. And, in hindsight, the reason was that objectively, she was the best option for me. Back then, I thought she was pretty smart. (She really wasn't, in hindsight, she was just the best option I had). Later on, at age 15, when I went to a different 'junior college' (For those who don't know, in India, we have 'junior college' in 11th and 12th grade), I had more and better options. Then, I never had this issue ever again. Moral of the story - you need to meet higher-quality women. If you're the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room. This could not apply more when it comes to dating, especially when it comes to a lack of options. Because, that's the issue at hand. You're obsessing over one girl because you're feeling a scarcity of options. Potentially you're rationalizing to yourself that higher-quality options don't exist. And, I'm here to tell you - they do. You just have to go out and explore.

I have heard a lot of people say this and I don't agree with it. The underlying assumption is that the reality of who you are, as a man, is 'bad', whereas the reality of who you are, as a woman, is 'perfect'. And, in my opinion, this is simp-propaganda. Why should the man have to grow through criticism?! Why can't we get love and approval?! We deserve better treatment than to be kicked when we're down.

You're the one defending David Deida's illusion, in which he's forcing you to internalize criticism and self-hate and then attaching some 'spiritual meaning' to it. I'm here, trying to help you out of that illusion! 'Enjoy your friends' criticism'. I'm not hating on women. My honest opinion is that we should learn from women how to be kind to each other.

@flowboy Man bad, woman good. The content that trashes on men and says that 'you have to grow by criticism' is not toxic, oh no. It's the content that acknowledges your struggles and supports you through it - that's the real toxic content. Isn't it?!

Oh, please treat me like a woman. If that's what it takes to be cared about and listened to seriously, 'I identify as a woman'. You can be treated like dogshit, you can have people spit in your face and criticize you. I don't want that.

Man bad, woman good. If I had female parts, you would be singing a different tune. Don't you want men to be strong, to have credibility, to be loved and supported?! Don't you want men to be so strong that they can destroy anyone who gets in their way?! You simps only listen to a woman's word, right?! Here, have a look. This is serious.

@something_else I don't know what 'hatred' you're talking about. I don't hate them, I'm just recognizing the reality of how they operate and I'm figuring out solutions for it. Ah, all criticisms of women/feminists is 'misogyny'. That's the hatred. Man bad, woman good. @Spiral I love the theories you come up with about someone you only know online. Looks like you're the one spending too much time online and projecting that onto me.

I don't, actually. I would rather women just read my mind and knew how to treat me with respect. But, unfortunately, that's not how the modern world works. You have to teach women how to treat you with respect. (And feminists are immediately disqualified, cuz they barely see you as human, they see you as an evil monster just cuz you have man-parts) This is the solution to their daddy-issues. Once they learn it, then you can relax with them.

This is 'leadership'. You set the rules as the leader, cuz the initiative is yours. And, what I'm saying, is that you should set them according to your boundaries. There are a lot of women who criticize men for asking them 'what do you bring to the table?'. They say, you're supposed to directly set expectations and you're supposed to regulate us on whether we're meeting them or not! And that that's how you assert your boundaries. When you ask the table-question, that's a flip in polarity.