Rishabh R

You can question your thoughts and recognise that your thoughts are not you , your deep contemplative thoughts are you .

Past trauma is surfacing on my mind of how girls rejected me , how bad they treated me. I think that I will be never loved by a girl who is not my family number. A little background here - I am a 22 year old college student studying engineering. I am single . Never been in a relationship with a girl.

@Danioover9000 bullied by girls and boys in school . This month I have done 50+ approaches. Yesterday I cold approached a girl in the campus of different department and was kicked out from there by her boyfriend.

Thank you guys

I was talking to a girl suddenly a guy came he asked whom you were talking to and he threatened me , said that she is his girlfriend. Go out of the campus he told me abusing me . I was abused by him loudly, he was also a senior . I told this incident to my friends they told me to not to go and talk to girls - just study (which I always hear most of the time ). Which means that I will never get a girlfriend.

Guys and @Leo Gura I need help please

By the way this has happened to me over the context of 1 month were I have approached more than 50 girls .

Contemplated the above question for days : -Non negative thinking -Expecting the situation to turn anytime -Looking forward -Having a forthsight plan -Going despite failure -Recognizing that setbacks are small -Knowing that anything can change -Working -Recognizing the transient nature of setbacks -Fixing the variables which are not working -Drive -Understanding which is working which is not working -Recognizing which is forwarding the result and which is reversing the result

12 out of 40

Hey , @Leo Gura must I set huge expectations or low expectations for success in any domain of life ?

Any help is appreciated .

@Leo Gura ok thank you.

-By recognising that life is a game -By recognising that I am in a play -By recognising that everything has long-term consequences -By recognising that people are leading off a cliff By recognising that I am playing -By moving ahead -By recognising the effects of 3-5 step ahead Any thoughts @Leo Gura and guys?

@Eternal Unity not quite sure ?

@Eternal Unity and @theleelajoker thanks.

What beliefs of mine am I unwilling to question or change ? 1-I will not get a girlfriend 2-People are bad 3-Beleiving that I can get 8 cgpa is futile 4-Changing beliefs won't have any significant effect on my life 5-This exercise is useless 6-That girls are evil 7-That I don't hold beliefs What are the alternative perspective on them to which I can experiment on ? 1- I will get a girlfriend but I don't know her type I don't know I will get a girlfriend or not I will get a girlfriend if I talk to girls long enough 2- People's mood changes for time to time People are complex People act according to the effect of circumstance on them 3-Getting an 8 cgpa is not under my control I can get upto 8cgpa in internals Less than 8 cgpa is not that bad 4-Beliefs influence actions which in turn produces results It can influence my mood Recognising the belief is different from reality is good 5-This exercise can level up my life This exercise can increase my understanding of life This exercise is one of the most worthwhile things I can do 6-Girls are loving people, caring people Girls are normal beings Girls are like me 7- I hold tons of beliefs Approximately 80-90% of my beliefs are wrong I function based on beliefs Any thoughts @Leo Gura and fellow forum folks ?

-Imagination -Isness -Being -Nowhere

Contemplation : -Increasing my understanding -Making me know life -Making me see a situation unbiased -Making me interesting -Aligning me with truth

@Thought Art I have a diary in which I write my insights.

-More emphasis on updated knowledge -No access to previous knowledge -Unholistic revelation of thing -Discarding of previous dimension -Unacknowledgement of other dimension of life -Overestimating one dimension -Underestimating other dimensions of life -Ungreatful of previous experiences -It is different from understanding the sutuation

Ya it's a great book I have read this book and heard the summary of Manson's second book. Also I am currently reading models.

I was contemplating that - How do I overcome heartbreaks ?and following answers came to my mind . - They are not as special as I think -It will be ok -They have chosen the wrong guy over me -It is not me it is their short mindeness -By moving on - By ignoring them -By recognising that I am attached to many people I hope the message was delivered.

Yeah @Roy that's true cause in the midst of heartbreak we assume that it is the last person whom I got attracted to which is an illusion.

-Understanding -Change in form -To go through evolution -To move forward -To pass from evolution -To experience different perspectives

So there was this girl whom I liked and I proposed her on telegram by saying - I love you. She first said - Are you crazy man.I said - I like you . She asked why? I said cuz you're beautiful. She then said shut up . And then said I will slap you in the face . I said- please reply . She said - that's the reply . Next day I got a threat call from her friend. After an year I told about her to my classmates even a senior. Then I had a conversation with her on WhatsApp where she abused me but I didn't abuse her cause it's my authenticity not to abuse. I told her friend who threatened me that I was hurt by him . He told me to stop crying (I don't know why he told me this cause I wasn't crying ). Then I came to know that that guy's girlfriend was laughing at me saying that how fearful am I how juvenile am I . When my college opened I saw her making a guy her best friend.And this memory is lingering in my mind even though time has passed. Maybe I need to move. After watching Leo's how to get laid series I daily talk to atleast 2-3 girls.So how do I deal with this situation?- Maybe I need to contemplate it . Anyways thank you @Leo Gura for your life transfoing content even though I am feeling bad right now .Also I have a question that must I be an optimist that good days and good girls are coming in the future ?