Rishabh R

@CARDOZZO It is good that you are working with a purpose in mind but as an advice watch out that your confidence doesn't turn into narcricissm.

@Majed That's some solid progress. It is from this place that you can create healthy relationships. I too have been getting treatment from psychiatrist since, past 7 years. What I have realized that people like us overlook our progress be it in career,dating or anything else. All the best.

@Leo Gura I would disagree with you since one aspect of improving in this domain is putting something else in more important position in your life and then women are secondary. Also acting on one's standards such as choosing the woman who treats you with decency as well as the woman whom you like as a person is of huge importance.

@Ramanujan Books are useful since they can give you a direction to walk towards healing but ultimate you have to walk towards that path, I mean taking action. Also , taking action is simpler than we assume and think when we procrastinate or avoid doing important things. Hope you heal.

@Ramanujan Mostly not but remember that a woman who is receptive to you will not only treat you decently but also initiate a conversation with you in fact she will approach you. It happened to me a lot. Plenty of hot women gave me signals by not only having prolonged eye contact with me but approaching me ,talking to me by initiating conversations,treating me with decency. The key is to pick on those signals and capitalise on them.

I liked this advice @Someone here. But the part that as a make I have a right to have a girlfriend gave me emotional pain since, in the past people snatched my right. Even though I socialized a little bit. In fact I was bullied by both boys due to the fact that I hot on girls . Girls also bullied me because I hit on them. However , I have cold approached 58 girls in the past and combining it with warm approach it is more than 100. Maybe my pain has to do with the fact that I didn't eat my antidepressants yesterday night 😂.

@lostingenosmaze I think that not giving a F--- about what this YouTuber says or do is the key for us to move forward despite hate since there will always be haters and lovers in our lives.

@Natasha Tori Maru I have been treated badly in the past several times by different people in general but I think that personal development/self-help work has been a large part in my emotional well being. For example - Holding the perspective in mind that in life people come and go no matter how rude or how good they are. Also , I felt good by seeing the responsibility part of your response. In overcoming adversity radical responsibility instead of blame is extremely useful such as - I am responsible for everything in my experience no matter what the external circumstance.(This last line is not my own word but from a self-help book that I read 3 times from beginning to end).

@Natasha Tori Maru So separating one's identity from criticism and then adjusting based on the feedback is necessary for improving one's life based on feedback ? Even though at times criticism tends to be based on misunderstanding and wrong assumptions.

It's a myth since different women like all sorts of men. Also ,building the foundation of a relationship on initial spark or attraction and ignoring value alignment , compatibility , self-respect often backfires.

@LifeEnjoyer I hope that you heal and find someone who is meant to be with you. Sorry to hear that . Are you feeling ok ?

@integral Indeed a weak and unhealthy coping mechanism which causes further problems .

@integral That's why I never ever smoked a cigerette in my life ,I mean I didn't even touched it . I think that people smoke to avoid or run away from negative emotions. In order to look cool they avoid suffering going through which is a strength in itself. Yesterday I was feeling bad due to a girl rejected me romantically in college in the past but I embraced it and a smile returned to my face for 2 times amidst suffering . Later the suffering was gone. By suffering I mean that I was reactively angry .

I opened the blog posts after a while and saw this post which was pure gold . Thanks @Leo Gura.

I think contemplation is becoming my favorite tool nowadays even though I have been contemplating since 2021. I contemplated for 31 minutes , 49 seconds.-How do I reduce my craving for external attention ? - By measuring my worthiness of bring loved by my past and present actions in dating -By telling myself that it is superficial and fades away quickly -By craving my values of resilience and tranquility amidst suffering instead -By thinking that even if I would get all the love and attention I desire I would suffer badly and my present state is good

@eTorro I am battling junk food addiction. Sometimes I have broken the addiction but relapsed into my habit of consuming it.

I like this perspective.

Owen. An advice from an internet friend -Rishabh. Try to listen to her compassionately , support her on her mental health journey and remind her that her last doesn't decide her future love life potential. Try to make her understand that it is better to detach past traumatic circumstances from future potentials. Overall it seems wise to me that she is taking professional help ,sorting this out by talking to you. It speaks me about healthy processing of emotional pain and symptoms rather than supression which many people do by addictive substances to numb their negative emotions.

Criticizing others based on inaccurate assumptions about them without doing the investigative work in their circumstances,nature,genetics ,family background etc.

@integral This is a wise insight, 2 years ago I recognized that more I run from negative emotions more they get amplified and paradoxically more I accept them the lesser they disturb me or get reduced. Thank you.

@Amer I would advise to just start and remeber that taking action is simpler as well as easier than we think. Stop caring about external outcomes ,metrics and only care about putting effort . Sorry if my tone seems harsh but I have experience the immense benefits of this mindset . All the best.

@eTorro Your doing great work by Mastering your mind since mind influences action,living,emotions etc. My thought is that consider mind mastery more important during failure,adversity and suffering. For example applying Growth mindset during failure (I personally applied it for more than a year when I was facing rejections constantly in my campus placement and finally I got into corporate sector ),reframing your experience during suffering and adversity . Final take of mine on this impressive post is - Consider questioning your thoughts for checking their accuracy and validity. They all are path of mind mastery since, bullshit thoughts and assumptions are the mind's default way of operating in the world which create problems since mental and physical world are intimately connected.

Happy Birthday @Leo Gura

Trying to stop caring about validation and instead caring about one's own behaviour is a better thing to care about than wheather other people validate you or not. Learned this after huge amount of suffering,insults and disrespectful interactions (even though they still happen now but now I care less about them ).

@Majed You demonstrated an act of self-respect.