something_else

The cheap solution to getting over this is to go to the busiest places. Like the places where you can’t even move from people. This seems counter-intuitive, but in a huge crowd you blend in, no one can tell you are alone so your mind lets you relax. And the chances of you meeting people is much higher. The root solution is what @flowboy recommended, however.

So I'm at the 8-9hr mark now. Was def a good first trip I reckon from reading other people's reports was prob about 80-100µg tab, so ideal first time trip dosage. I also now really wanna take a higher dosage and get properly blown away instead of just enjoying a cool headspace and some neat visuals. I think the thing I enjoyed the most was just closing my eyes and letting my mind morph and melt through tons of different random shapes, visuals and stories in my mind. It really is beautiful I tried going for a walk at one point but that was a mistake. I live in a town centre with lots of people around and the paranoia was intense and unpleasant quite quickly, so I just went home.

This feels like an exaggeration. I'm 1999, so technically a Zoomer (although I'd probably relate more to millennials) and I haven't really experienced anything like that. I'm regularly interacting with people in the 18-20 range as well and again, never really heard any stories of something like this. Plenty of dudes actually just being creepy though. I think what has happened is that zoomers have absolutely fucked social skills, especially the boys, so they are actually just being more creepy on the whole. I don't think it's that we are necessarily more sensitive to creepy behaviour now than before. Maybe a little bit. I hear a lot of people talk about the end of dating because of cancel-culture etc. but if you actually go out and about all the socially well-adjusted people are not having an issue, really. Perhaps it's different in the era of younger zoomers, that I don't know. It will be interesting to see how things go.

You don't know if the sources are full of shit or not. Again, back to the sport analogy: if you have never played basketball you could read 1000 books on it and think every one of them is genius, and taught you the truth. But I would still not come to you for basketball lessons, nor would I recommend anyone else does. For example, Leo's booklist has a value of $35 because of his own personal experience. We trust him to recommend good books and filter out bad ones. His booklist would be worthless if he himself had no experience. Not everything, just your posts about attraction advice. I just take a little bit of issue with someone preaching advice who doesn't have the experience to back it up. That's all. I think that's a fairly justifiable reason to question someone, especially since you post a lot in this sub-forum. From what I can tell, you've applied your booksmart attraction advice twice in your life. And that's it. You've successfully attracted two girls, now you feel qualified to tell other guys how to attract girls. If this is not the case and you have a lot more experience, then my point is moot.

I mean if that's what you're doing by all means continue. But somehow don't get the feeling that's true, or you'd have mentioned it sooner.

No no, it's definitely because you're a Cancer ♋

What job are you applying for there out of curiosity? As for working in an Amazon warehouse, your experience is not isolated. Amazon are actually running out of people to hire in a lot of places now because their staff turnover rate is through the roof. It's 150% per year which is absolutely nuts. You're certainly not alone in being screwed over by them.

Not disputing your knowledge/experience in relationships, only in the attraction phase. Knowing how to react on the fly is the heart of game.

It doesn't make a difference. You are giving advice about something you do not have a lot of experience with, which is unwise. Do you know how to advise basketball players because you read a hundred books about basketball and then scored two hoops? That is analogous to what you are doing right now. I'm not saying books are bad. I'm saying that book knowledge about attraction is not that valuable to most men, especially when it's not combined with practice. It's almost exactly like trying to learn a sport through reading books. When you show up for day 1 of basketball practice, they don't give you an assigned reading of 3 books. This is the point I am trying to convey at heart. Attracting girls isn't about having the right information, beyond the very basics And it is the heart of game. Dating Gurus largely write books to make lots of money. It's a very grifty genre of book on the whole because it sells so well

I agree entirely. Which is why you don't need to read lots of books to do it With one girl. That is not really quantifiable success from a particular method, it's mostly just the fact that you left your house, went somewhere with girls, and weren't totally socially inept. Because that's really all it takes for the average dude to get laid If you wanna be a player all you gotta do is keep going to places with lots of girls and refine your strategy for working the venue. And when it comes to actually talking to girls you just learn it by doing it over and over and seeing what works It's almost entirely about overcoming your fears rather than knowing what exactly to do

In regards to relationships, fair enough. You have a decent amount of experience and I think the parts of your posts that discuss that area are the parts I generally agree with and think are very well written However the attraction advice you give feels abstract and theoretical, which is not that useful, and is where I was questioning your experience. And it does seem you lack experience there Attracting girls is often about keeping it simple, getting the basics right, lots of practice. The more theory you consume, the more in your head you get. And it’s also about knowing the logistics: where to go, how to find girls, where to take girls, how to lead, how to deal with logistical problems that occur etc. It’s very hard to understand how this works and give advice on this topic without talking to a fuck ton of girls, you simply can’t understand the problems that come up on an emotional level (fear, anxiety) for guys trying to attract girls, or how girls will typically respond to certain things, or how to lead a girl in the short term None of that can be learned from a book

Then why all the research? Sorry, I wasn't saying you have low EQ. I was suggesting that you are primarily approaching relationships and giving advice to others on relationships in a very 'IQ' theoretical way, which is how I could pick out that you didn't have that much direct experience. Whenever I hear people talk about some wildly amazing book for dating, I always get sceptical. Men have been attracting women for hundreds of thousands of years, there's nothing new or secret to discover about it that can be taught to you by reading a bunch of books. You can get most of the theory for how to attract women from a 30 second google search: confidence, edginess, fun, playful, masculine, exciting, authenticity, detachment, exposure to lots of women. You actually can just boil down the whole thing to: go out and talk to lots of women, try exhibiting some of the above traits, push yourself, learn from mistakes, repeat. IMO reading books is counterproductive to the whole process. You're meant to be getting yourself out of your head, not cementing yourself in a cinder block of theory

Good to know. I'd rather start safe as well. I have a reasonably reliable source now anyway for when I want to get more.

Thanks @Benton @Cykaaaa! Will be sure to try out those suggestions From what I gather a typical tab is anywhere from 50-150µg, and I'm planning on taking one tab. I have a fairly high tolerance for other substances so I think that should be fine.

So, I do appreciate what you post here. And oftentimes I agree with you. But I did get a distinct vibe of "this guy has consumed way too much theory without much practice" from you which is why I asked. This particular post was a strong example of that. Most of the issues people have with dating don't really come from a lack of theoretical understanding. It's to do with getting yourself into the correct emotional state, dealing with fear, anxiety, knowing the right locations to go to, learning to be more sociable, building up a social circle etc. These things are very hard for someone with only a theoretical understanding to advise upon, because you don't have much experience with the emotional rollercoaster of relationships. You're basically applying IQ to a problem that fundamentally requires you to develop EQ. Wrong tool for the job. This is a warning sign to me. I would not normally take advice from someone who has only applied their own advice once or twice. If all of your theory is so useful to you, and works so well, why have you not gone out and applied it more?

Trying to do too many different things at once rather than concentrating your efforts Believing what someone (e.g. a spiritual teacher) tells you at face value, without doing your own investigations

No for all of these, girl's attraction very rarely changes over time. If a girl isn't attracted to you there's little you can do to change that. Unfortunately your best bet is to move on. Think of how many other girls there are out there! There are probably 1000 other girls you'd be attracted to within walking distance of you right now. Don't waste your time on a girl who won't reciprocate. I'd keep her as a friend if you think you can handle that, having female friends is good

Out of curiosity, how much direct experience do you have in this area?

Really well said

Might be an undiagnosed knee injury. Those things are pretty fragile, especially the ligaments. If you live in a country with free healthcare or you're not poor, it's worth getting it looked at by a physiotherapist or a doctor

This is basically what a FWB is lol Don't get hung up on the terminology. It's just a term meaning casual sex. The friend part is not really relevant. And it's rarely just sex. Most of the time it's a person you have great chemistry with but neither of you are at a time in life when you feel like you want a committed relationship. It's exactly what you want, but you're inventing a new description for it to avoid the negative stigmas you have in your mind towards FWB and casual sex. It's a very feminine thing to do and culture pressures you to shame this part of yourself, so I don't blame you.

Oh, ok. Then just get yourself a FWB or two and stop caring about commitment at all for now. That's how you are gonna get the most masculine energy if that's what you really want. It's not being used for sex if you enjoy it too. Once you've had your fill then start going back looking for something committed. Or perhaps one of your FWB relationships turns into something more committed by itself. This is a much healthier approach

So you want an exclusive casual relationship where you're not even having sex? Now I'm just confused. At that point you're just friends. What even is the point? Well, you're right. But you're right because women offer sex. That's the only reason they can choose whatever they want in the dating market. But it seems you're not offering that. So most guys are gonna be less willing to compromise on strange relationship setups, especially if they involve commitment. I'm trying to find a way to write this that isn't going to trigger you, but I've decided to just be straight. Locking guys into sexless relationships and using them for intimacy is a very leechy dating tactic. In this setup, a guy is getting very very little value from you so you're going to be limited to very desperate men and you'll probably have trouble getting them to stay with you. Especially if you're looking at men from sexually liberal countries like the Europe, the US or the UK.

I'm simply giving you my perspective and drawing on some experience I have. Of course you have no obligation to listen to anything I say, but you made a thread asking for advice/perspectives and I gave it, so no need to get angry. You have a tendency to react very aggressively to advice that you don't like I mean... yes to an extent. Just because there's someone out there who will get into this with you doesn't mean it's a good idea for either of you to do it. By all means go looking for it and see for yourself. Things will get messy because neither of you will really know what sort of relationship you are in and what the boundaries are. Men especially are often not particularly fond of this sort of emotional drama and lack of clarity in relationships either. Just go have some fun casual relationships until you're ready for something more serious again. It sounds like you want to be very possessive over guys, which can prevent you from being able to build relationships with the most masculine/attractive dudes who aren't gonna be so fond of that

One of the girls I was seeing recently wanted this kind of relationship. It was extremely confusing. When I ended things I said it was because I wasn't ready for a relationship and she kept talking about how she agreed and didn't want a relationship either and so we should stay together. But she wanted us to do everything that people in a relationship do No man wants to navigate a situation like that, it's messy and awkward as fuck, and someone's gonna get hurt You can't have it both ways. You either commit to a guy or you suck up your ego and go have some more casual relationships with zero obligations. Casual doesn't mean no emotional connection, it just means you have to be secure enough to not be remotely possessive or jealous over them