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@Harlen Kelly Many guys had success with women because of nofap Don't talk down like that. It certainly did help my growth, and not everything needs to raise your consciousness to evolve you. It can simply be a stepping stone

@dflores321 Exactly! Being God conscious is an ideal that will take years to reach, but for the meantime the least I can do is at least this - save and redirect my sexual energy towards Being, relationships, workout and more. Day 205 baby ? Alright mate, so this is the plan: Raising your sexual energy from no fap - directing this energy and using it towards relationships which will eventually lead to sex (it also helps with reducing anxiety and building confidence) - then direct it to more deeper sex which is almost spiritual - and then I'm sort of "free" and not so affected by the outcome of jerking off by myself. Is this right?

@Harlen Kelly Notice how you use "repression". When you started meditation didn't you "repress" your thoughts/feelings/desires/"negative" emotions? You need some kind of restrict for starting to get going, especially if you're not God conscious or some shit. Dude you could literally say the same thing about eating healthy (probably an even better example) because you "restrict" yourself from shoving junk food into your system. But you might say "but I don't feel like eating junk food. If I feel like it then I won't suppress it". Well then, I don't feel like masturbating. Actually I do have a desire for sex, but sex, not simply masturbation. Anyways, if it is neurotic then why should I repress the neurosis itself? It will just go spiral of neurosis

@dflores321 @Harlen Kelly No so here's the thing, you guys are just assuming things. Yeah, many people start doing nofap as a neurotic behavior, but with time it becomes less neurotic, in the sense that you won't feel the need to repress it all the time for the benefits, but rather you'd choose to not fap because it just feels so good not to waste that energy. Every day I feel energetic, clear minded, enjoy the little things, view people differently, help me connect with my inner self and my truest desires which were hidden by the sexual thoughts. I really like living like that. Personally I don't believe that liking a tit post and seeing hot women is a no no, but more like watching porn. Yes, because it affects the brain and really slows my growth down. Yeah alright you can say that it is neurotic because I'm using "restricts" on myself and that the true way is just getting those results from a non neurotic way. But still, you want to accelerate your growth, no? Do you realize that I can say the same thing on meditation? Then why the fuck do you meditate? You know the benefits, and so you have your routine... And you know that it will shoot your growth so you do it. Honestly try to see what I'm saying and look into how they are not so different. Telling someone to nofap and telling someone meditate come from the idea that it will grow you a lot and so you begin by getting really into them until you love them and then it's just natural and fun

@Leo Gura What do you have to lose by trying nofap and no porn? I bet that if you try it you'll see that it's really beneficial. You don't need to buy into the scientific studies but I and many others have tried it and it certainly does improve life quality. Dude this can seriously help you with your work as well. Try doing the emotionally harder thing. The is a reason why you do give a fuck about some aspects in your life like health and business and you could also disregard those "scientific" evidence.

@Nahm Is it possible for me to feel empowerment, freedom, enthusiasm but also some anxiety at the same time? I mean, it is happening but I don't see how it reconciles with the emotional scale. It's confusing when you regard several emotions in play

@Leo Gura If you know any human in the world that can do such things then it makes more sense what you're saying. I'm so far from these levels but still, if there is no one to be known of having achieved this the what you're saying is your own personal speculation since you don't know for sure. And maybe you might be the first one to discover. But surely there are people who are like 10 fold more conscious than you are (who started very early and took it extremely serious)

@Leo Gura Dude this is very hard, especially when most of the spiritual culture talks about disregarding desires and saying that it's the ego and that this and the mind are your enemies. You cannot not hear people saying that those lower desires are bad (mostly in an indirect way). It's enough that you say that something is bullshit or stupid that newbies (like myself) will easily create a shadow of it, which just makes their work even harder. I can tell you for certain that a lot of my work has gone just to deconstruct those notions about spirituality so that I can start pursuing real spirituality

Isn't it true? ? No but for real, is the ultimate goal to eventually detach from everything? Because that way it makes more sense to me that you can become the most liberated person on earth. If this post seems inappropriate then delete ? But still asking

@BipolarGrowth You know, I used to feel like that a few months ago when learning about all this spiritual stuff. I used to think that if I have way more understanding than 99.99% of the people, then it's as though I've "lost" the journey for discovering those things on my own at a slower pace. I had notions that it's like forcing myself to become "old" and skip on life and just reach to the end. After looking into it deeper and "upping" my awareness levels I see that this is EXACTLY what I need to pursue, and that there is no "too early" or "rushing it". Rather than skipping on life it feels more like going deeper in life. It feels more like slowing the time rather than accelerating it. And above all I can experience vastly what's happening in the moment. I also used to think that enlightenment and spiritual work meant that at one point all the feelings I'll feel are joy, bliss and calmness, which sounded ok, but not really rich so there was some cognitive dissonance. I tried suppressing "negative" emotions. But in general I feel like everyone goes through similar phases of understanding spirituality in more depth. In my current state my understanding is that spirituality means the pursuit of real freedom. Freedom from attachment, freedom to feel all emotions (even the "negative"), freedom to think without suppressing. But also freedom to move between my lower and higher self, consciousness and unconsciousness.

@EmptyVase Amazing insight. Now that I think about it I'm actually always expressing something, but in most cases very very mild feelings. When I'm trying to be aware of them, however, it can become a bit neurotic and I build lies on top of lies that will do a great job in blocking my way from experiencing what is actual. Yeah exactly. That's what I meant that was very hard, because I know at the back of my mind that my honest thoughts and feelings aren't true and so as a natural response I suppress them (or disregard them, however you'd call it). As an analogy, you could think about it like an artist who doesn't produce his music because of his maladaptive perfectionism (fear of failing) and he believes that he doesn't have the talent, thus pushes it aside. Maybe not the best analogy but I hope you get it. I still judge my emotions and believes. How could you possibly fucking not? You always hear about hierarchies of emotions from society (obviously), spirituality (a lot) and self help, in subtle ways. There's a very wrong approach towards emotions imbedded in most people which just makes us neurotic and judgmental like myself. I won't always be next to a journal. Also a habit will need to be built for practicing expressive journaling. There's a pre-phase that I feel quite neurotic even starting doing it, because will probably be quite judgmental.

Play from around 5:37 It's just so funny how he is talking about that religion acts out of fear and stick to its ideology, while he is doing exactly the same! And feels the pride!

@Leo Gura Where would you put yourself?

I wouldn't call it such a "serious" problem, but it is very painful and I've gotten used to suppress it over and over so now I just never think about it really. Almost every time I hear soundtracks of video games/anime that I used to enjoy I get overwhelmed and I hate this feeling. I mean, I used to actually quite enjoy it and bask in it, but I've learned that after a while it actually makes me feel quite depressed, and also I'm scared that some family member or someone will watch me in this state of overwhelm so I play stoic and suppress. I think I'm a very sensitive person when it comes to nostalgia and feelings. Music hits me in such a deep way (almost profound) and it brings a shit ton of thoughts and feelings which I feel don't serve me any purpose other than taking me back to the past. I need to focus on the present but I just keep getting those doses. A big reason why I feel overwhelmed is because I had a dream to create music covers of video game/anime music (inspired by other youtubers) and simply create my own music (and maybe also video game someday), but my neurosis disabled me from doing anything, and so each time I hear beautiful tunes from something I enjoyed then it reminds me quickly of my neurosis and I suppress it, basically Honestly, I don't know what was really my question but it would be cool to hear what you say about it. By the way, it tends to happen a lot when I'm getting into a period of high - I mean like starting to get back into practicing the piano, back into enjoying life, back into meeting old friends, summer is coming, end of school (and all the people whom I've been with for 12 years), starting soon a new phase in my life. Things are growing and changing and I feel like I've improved a lot since following Actualized.org.

@Being Frank Yang I think I got half of what you said. So you aren't attached to it in the sense that anything could change to your body and you'll still be cool with it. I believe by "enjoy" you mean excitement (as stimulation). I am working out but I don't know if I am doing it for fun or because I think it looks good. I believe there's a difference between working out to show off and working out because you admire a nice physique for yourself (or there's no? I am no near awakening level yet since I'm not full time focused on it and it's not my main focus for those fear years. But well, hopefully I'll get what you said sometime... By the way you are a fricking wise guy my dude. Your videos are also fun to watch with those cool ass effects

@EmptyVase What do you mean "the more dots naturally start to connect"? Very insightful. But how do I express? Weird question I know, but when I try to express I feel like I try to express and it feels a bit unnatural. On what should my focus be? Because while "expressing" is an act of freedom, when done in a monitored way, feels like I'm trying to "capture" the moment with my awareness (which seems a bit off). Also, I want to mention that although it is insightful I believe you really need a flexible mind to do this exercise. To aim towards worry from blame seems so insane for the mind. Like I know that I'm trying to get my brain to think in a certain pattern of believes, while knowing there are higher belief systems. It's quite a radical shift. Hard for me to see how you can be honest with your "negative" believes - Because you think they are right! That's why they're your believes in the first place! And you need to play into your "dumbness". Tricky. Exactly. The trap is to develop neurotic behaviors from this work, and I can also be be neurotic.. from avoiding being neurotic So when you do your mindfulness practice (or whatever meditation, if you do) and you decide to label "feeling" (inner feeling. or "emotion"), what do you focus on? What are you directing you focus? Today it has been hard for me to feel a feeling, so what I tried doing is deciding that I want to feel the feeling that I'm most comfortable feeling now, or that is more suited for the situation I'm in (like letting go of this whole hierarchy of feelings). I will admit that it is hard to just let yourself feel whatever without judging yourself. I also feel that a main problem with the emotional scale (as a map) is that is can really slow down your growth, especially if you're a newbie. You see this scale and your immediate thought is of a hierarchy, which brings in Mr. Neurosis into the game.

@Being Frank Yang Then what is your motivation behind it? Like for what purpose does it serve you personally? Be honest. Even if it's doing whatever the fuck you want, do you feel like it's giving you some pride or something?

@Nightwise Yeah, guess I still have work to do. But by the definition Leo gave, it seems as though happiness from eating ice-cream and happiness from being content with the moment (being) are different things rather than different in degree. I would like to somehow reconcile it to be a difference of degree but it sounds like excitement has to do more with stimuli, while happiness has to do more with letting go and being content. Or could the degree be in what feels good in general (even though they seem like two different systems) ?

I've just finished watching Leo's video "What Is Happiness?" in which he talks about the difference between what we call happiness (excitement) and real happiness (contentment with the present moment), and in one reply he said that if you are able to be happy just from staring at a tree then you have gotten to the "goal" (at least from back then. Old video). From all my meditation practice, mindfulness, gym (and health), nofap and reading I feel like my dopamine levels are so fricking high that I get so much stimuli from simply feeling the wind, looking at the sky, listening to birds. I can simply sit and do nothing but this good feeling is more like excitement and less being peaceful and calm, has an energetic vibe to it. Does it mean I have achieved happiness? I still have problems in life though and some inner issues but overall this is a result of lots of inner work. Maybe it's just that I can get very sensitive or just high overall energy. Would like to know since I know people here probably have gotten to this stage. It's almost scary how just being can be so satisfying. And more terrifying what if I actually do something exciting like going on a roller-coaster, won't the excitement overwhelm me to the point where it doesn't feel good anymore? I'm already excited during my mindfulness practices..

Yeah, it is completely normal that it will happen. After eating a meal it feels quite heavy and also your body is expending a lot of energy on digesting it, hence you don't have so much energy for your other productive pursuits. Personally, I prepare myself ahead of time knowing that after a meal I won't be so productive, and thus I try to get some work done before the meal. This is also why I don't like eating a heavy meal before watching a video on Actualized.org because I want the energy required to concentrate

@Being Frank Yang I don't know, then why try to show your amazing physique? There was a thread not to long ago about building a good physique, and Leo for example said that he rather keep looking lean because it's more healthy, and building a nice physique serves no purpose really. Only for ego. How can you build your physique without it being ego gratification, or is it the only way? Just curious to know more details on your take on it

@Being Frank Yang Hey man, I assume you must have been getting this question asked a lot, but still - Why are you passionate about building a good physique? Isn't that just ego gratification? I also workout and want to get those gains you know, but I think I'm doing it to gratify my self image and was wondering your take on it.

I think what you're saying requires me to have some kind of meta perspective on my own mind processing which I don't have yet. The emotional scale kinda confuses me because: 1) what does it mean to "gently practice reaching for a better feeling thought"? By "reaching" does it mean monitoring my thoughts? 2) How far should I take it? It seems that if I'm going from jealousy to hatred and then anger, I might as well take it to Joy, but why would I do that? It's like as if my goal is to feel joyous every moment.

@EmptyVase Yeah so you see, I still try in subtle ways to control my feelings. I'm like: "what does it mean to express? Does expressing mean becoming aware of it? Ok, well.. here I go, try to express.. Shit, I'm pushing myself! Hold back, it's ok, just feel whatever is. Ok, now let's see what it really means to express and be aware... Where is the breaking point so that I can know how to do it? Shit, I'm trying to wrap my mind around it, trying to conceive and capture the process in my mind, but it doesn't work! I want to know what I'm doing and how to do it so that I can use it in my life but it seems to back-fire on me!"

Hi, I see you have many kinds of meditation techniques and different kinds of yoga you speak of. Do you do schedule your week such that you fit them all? I have a habit of 20 minutes in the morning breath meditation and then 30 minutes at night mindfulness with labeling (hear, see, feel)