KGrimes

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About KGrimes

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  1. @Leo Gura What's the way out of this? Surely you can break out of the cycle, does a significant enlightenment experience need to happen in order to have your consciousness shift towards looking for truth, like for example on psychadelics? Because after every trip I feel like I will live the spiritual life, but I always fall back, because it's just too different from my daily survival life.
  2. @itsadistraction It's simply do-nothing approach, right? As in i meditate because I want to, not because I need to. I contemplate because i feel like it, not because I have to, and I shouldn't be chasing anything?
  3. This is something I tried to grasp after several ego-backlashes. There are period in my life where I can meditate, do some trips, contemplate and have some new realizations, be very in tune with God, dedicate every day thinking about what true reality is and what im experiencing. And then something happen in real life that makes me so tired and maybe even pointless to pursue it, I just have no natural pull, it seems that it's something that you "have" to do rather than "want" to do. And then I become less and less aware, which leads to some suffering, not being happy with material things - money, sex, career, drugs, etc. and then I go back to meditating, contemplating, reading books of god-realized authors. And then I fall again. Yet over the years my sense of reality, even at the points where im not living very consciously, I feel a slight change in perspective. Like sometimes I'd be very busy and focused on survival and it hits me how pointless it is, or it's just all a dream, and that regardless what I do or pursue, it really doesn't matter unless I can become awakened and break the cycle. Sometimes Im fine with the idea that it may take several lifetimes. And sometimes Im not. Curious about your struggles with this.
  4. There's only a handful of people on this forum that you should take seriously. Everything else is just bullshit - a bunch of people thinking they are awake or enlightened, when they are in-fact very far away from truth. My suggestion: Follow only mods and Leo, maybe a couple other users.
  5. The first time i realized that LoA works is when I was at the rave, front stage and manifested a water bottle. There was guy walking past, I asked for a sip and he gave me away his water bottle. Also the time i got a 70k$ bonus at work, after manifesting riches for 2 years. Also the time I manifested the apartment that I bought. And the time I manifested a relationship that ended up teaching me something. It's all very real. Once you clearly see how these things come to fruition, you will forever be conscious of your desires and what you are manifesting, because you can manifest bad things too,
  6. @PlayOnWords Thing is, It doesn't surprise me a lot when girls compliment me a lot, but this one was a big one. She told me she thought I was gay, because i was so hot, so I guess that's why i fell for it, LOL. I have not found such place, but I haven't searched much to be honest, I just don't feel the need to go to these spiritual meeting places just yet, but I know that if it continues, i'll probably start going to them around age 30 or after 30 when im a bit more mature and done with regular party place. I know there are festivals around the country where people do shrooms, lsd and do more hippy stuff than in your usual festival. Thanks !
  7. I'll try to keep this as concise as possible to give my experience. Just turned 26. I have virtually no real experience in long-term relationships, longest I ever lasted was maybe 3 months or so. It always felt forced, or I'd just straight up realized that this is not the right person very quick and quit the relationship at whatever stage it is. About 1.5 month ago I met a girl in a company event, we texted before, because we matched on Bumble a few months later, but she ghosted me. However, in real life she couldn't keep her eyes off me and it was sooo easy to just talk with her, she told me im hot as fuck in about 1 minute of us starting the conversation, so it was going well. Anyway, we made out that day, but we were both pretty drunk and I already saw some red flags there - very bossy, she asked me to choke her right away when we were kissing, and she seemed unstable, because once I told her she was crazy, in a sort of a good way, she kept insisting for me to explain or leave if " I can't talk". So I left her here and there right after we stopped making out. Anyway, I texted her next day, she apologized and asked to forget what happened. We started over. We kept dating, going on events, making out, having sex and watching movies for a few weeks, meeting maybe 2-3 times a week. Then one day we didn't text each other much, but I knew from my friend that she's probably going out on a friday night with her friend, and she didn't text me anything. The thing is, I had this idea in my head, that it's probably not gonna work out. Like I had this feeling all the time but couldn't quite tell what exactly it is. When I was spending time with her, it was all nice and fun, but once she leaves, I felt like it was a burden. So with this idea, I also thought to myself, it would be very funny, and very convenient if I saw her and her friend with some other guys in the club so we could break up here and there, which would then result in me not having to have "the talk", I know, pretty immature, right? But, if she was a bit of a better person, i'd probably not want to do that to her. Anyway, we went to the club with my friend, and in about a few hours I see my girl and her friend with a couple dudes at a bar, they are buying them drinks. Then I stay on the dancefloor, they come together, all hugging and shit and I just asked her "what's up?", she was shocked! Couldn't say anything, well atleast whatever she said i didn't hear, it was over for me here and there. She tried to save the situation by leaving the guys somewhere in the smoking room and talking some bullshit with me, but at that point I was already done. A week has passed now, and all I can say is that it sort of hurts a bit more than I expected, but one question that was always in my mind: "do I want to be in a relationship?" has been answered. I do. And I want that person to be a bit more spiritual than materialistic. I just feel like these materialistic girls have almost no values, and they are only good for short term fun. And I think that with the right person, the highest highs of a relationship is something that is impossible to experience in any other way, it can only be imagined.
  8. @Princess Arabia why would anyone, ever, care what celebrities do or feel like, especially as delusional as those two. Useless analogy.
  9. Loneliness. How you deal with it. If you are depressed because you are lonely, feel lonely all the time and that really hurts you, then realizing that you are the one and only will definitely fuck you up, because then you will be even more alone, forever. Also any big mental/psychological disorders. Also this: And this: I met so many people who have done psychedelics' in a completely different way and call themselves spiritual, when all they do is play games, watch movies and go outside occasionally, and they think that whatever realizations they have on psychedelics' is just the state of psychedelics' itself and that it's not at all real.
  10. Something I've been struggling with for a while now, because alcohol makes me FEEL things. Make me happy when im with friends, crazy good with girls and pickup, flirting, it makes me do some stuff I would never do sober, because I have mild anxiety. It also makes the music I mix sound better and easier ( I DJ as a hobby), It gives me some good feelings. But lately I've been feeling depressed whenever I drink too much on my own. And in the past few years I realized that I was drunk or buzzed more often than I was sober, by a large margin. And ever since then I started looking at it like it was a bad thing, and now I feel even worse, because whenever I tell myself that I wont drink, it's much much harder to resist, and when I slip, I get the negative emotions again. So it's a very slippery slope. However I always imagined myself sober in my 30s. Well, I got 5 more years I guess. Plan now is to atleast be sober more often than Im drunk, maybe have a drink or few on the weekend, maybe when there's something going on (birthdays, celebrations, etc.) I also quit weed, which used to be a substitute, so now I just vape nicotine. Really, hard to replace one addiction without adding anything else.
  11. Funny thing, I had a trip on mushrooms a couple days ago. It was intense, very intense, more profound than any other dozens of trips i've done before. At one point, my body was weak, I was melting in bliss, in absolute divinity. My body was shaking, I was laying in my bed, I felt like I was dying. So I put a blanket on (barely had the ability to do so), closed my eyes and I told myself that I am ready to die. That this is it. This will show me the Truth. As I was laying down I had all kinds of crazy visions, feelings, sensations, I was kind of ready, but also I thought about my parents, who and how anyone would find my body. Then I kept thinking that if this is what I think it is, there will be no one to find my body, because once I am dead, there's no one imagining this reality anymore, so who's gonna be left? Will there even be anyone here to find me? Well anyways, I really wanted to pee, and thought to myself that I don't want anyone to find me laying in my own piss, so some how I got to the bathroom and also unlocked my apartments door so that nobody needs to break in. Anyway, I laid there for a while and realized that I either already died, or that death is impossible, or it's not my time yet. I woke up, took a shower, ended a relationship with one girl I was texting with and went outside. So there's that lol!
  12. @Princess Arabia What would you be addicted to then..MeTube? If it was the only form of entertainment - yes. I don’t watch TV, I don’t watch Netflix, I have no Twitter, No Facebook and no Instagram. Am I addicted to social media? No. Am I addicted to YouTube? Yes, because even the most profound content ( Leo, Peter Ralston, etc.) is found on Youtube. But I don’t watch just the “useful” content, I watch the useless stuff too.
  13. Alcohol, weed in a way (i can go for break on months on end but always comeback), coffee, youtube, overthinking, my phone
  14. @Water by the River you’re right, and i think that any digging and intelectual thinking on almost any concept is a bad idea until you know who you truly are but it’s fun to think about it sometimes, if you don’t take it as a definitive truth (which recently i came with the grips of accepting the fact that I DO NOT KNOW SHIT!)
  15. If everything is predetermined by God, then it means that you have no Free Will, or very little of it. Which also means that pursuing awakening is pointless, if God’s Will for you is not to be awakened in this life. Which also means that you can meditate as much as you want, trip as much as you want and you will never awaken. But, most of the time, you will awaken after some time (could be very fast or very slow) and if you do those things, so how will you justify this experience? Was it Free Will or was it predetermined? Same with death. If I choose to Off myself right here and right now, then who did it? Was it my Free Will or was my whole life predetermined by God up to this point and that’s how it was supposed to be. In that case even when I think I have control over my experience, it’s actually an illusion. The concept of free will is probably one of the most important one to grasp, I am yet to fully grasp it, but the way I look at it is that you have free will on a lower, material level, and some big events in your life (enlightenment/awakening/death) are pre-determined, but it’s just the matter of time when it wil happen. Following this concept, you cannot fail, and it’s impossible for you to not become awakened, the question is wether or not you will transcend the dream, move on (achieve total liberation, samadhi, return to God) and choose to never reincarnate again.