Natasha Tori Maru

Let's hope they are padded cinderblocks ay? Otherwise heads will end up caved in 🤣

ᕙ⁠(⁠ ⁠ ⁠•⁠ ⁠‿⁠ ⁠•⁠ ⁠ ⁠)⁠ᕗ💜 I've been that girl! OP describes the turning point of a romantic relationship - it's either going to explode, end up with commitment, or cement it's definition as solely FWB (this is more unlikely, since she seems to have caught feelings).

Most people cannot comprehend sacrifice. This is a lot of what the story of Jesus is. Many people who turn to Christ do so because they have an experience of the meaning of sacrifice. Of course there are other reasons. The concept of sacrifice essentially acts to 'save them from themselves'. I personally feel these individuals outsource their sovereignty to religion in an attempt to merge themselves with morals and understanding they cannot attain on their own. And through this 'merging' they realign their inner systems and redefine themselves. The second coming of Christ is not meant to be literal - it is the 'Christ consciousness' within you IE merging or revelation. I say this with no judgement. I do not ascribe to a religion. I was just raised with many religions around me and always told they send the same message, all pretty much the same. Human interpretation is where things get murky.

This whole topic is fascinating, and I have very much attempted to attend to perceiving how sound and music effects my inner state. I am not sure it is so cut & dry regarding its effects. So I will as users a question: 1) do you listen to music, and walk away sad/happy/peaceful/joyous/angry? IE does the music you listen to effect your mood? 2) do you listen to music and feel no change, or an elevation, to your mood? IE you feel angry, so you put on angry music. This acts to offload the emotion and ease pain. Effectively purging the feeling. For myself, music does little to effect my mood. It will slightly. But I choose music according to my mood, and it acts to enhance good feelings, or ease bad ones. I do not take on the 'state' of the music genre. I've spent a lot of time on this, and asked others many questions. It usually comes down to one of the 2 above (but there is always some crossover).

Good tidings to us on our inner journey! I'll spend some time putting forth my own thoughts to your prosperity 🙏🖤

Does she ever have conversations where she wants you to 'define us' or is she content with the FWB label? When a girl catches feelings, she starts to think about being claimed by a man. Somehow through your interactions, she is perceiving that you only care about the snatch, and not the body/mind attached. Her actions are a strong bid for contact. Depending on her love language; acts of service, words of affirmation, gifts, physical intimacy without sexual intention, sex - you may need to work out how she receives love, and translate to it. I'd venture a guess and say she probably wants either words of affirmation or physical intimacy without sex. If she wants words, focus on expressing the qualities about her you value that aren't sexual in nature. If she wants affection, just do some cuddle puddle sugar glider sessions with no sex. But it is up to you if you want to communicate these things back to her. They have to be true for you, because you are in a grey area of courtship where attachment can get deeper and more serious, or break off entirely. She is definitely wanting you to express your feelings here. I really suspect she wants to hear you are attached to her for more than the sex. She sounds like she has feelings for you, and is a bit too emotionally charged up to trust herself to just outright ask you. This is really common in women. You do get some freaks who just walk up to you and spit it out though !

Of course, but the reply was in reference to thoughts that arrive during the day. Witnessing. That was the context I replied to, that you supplied. When the thoughts silence is something else. You make room for what is greater than yourself.

Yes, precisely! Which is why I love 'I am not ...' deconstruction. You eventually get to 'then what is left?' Out of the meditative state I rebuild, and of course, identify all over again with a new structure. Identify with a new bunch of thoughts. All the while slightly resigned to the fact that I'm probably going to have to rip this up again. The perpetual expansion and contraction cycle.

Interesting. I consider the above 'mindfulness' which is a byproduct of what meditation is training. This just naturally happens with me after engaging in intense meditation and maintaining daily practice. I really need a serious issue to emotionally upheave me out of a mindful state. I am generally within the moment 80% of the day. This requires a lot of routine & structure to act as a framework to enable mind stability. So you can trust you have everything in order to remain present. The last thing you need is to be thinking about a bill unpaid, or panicking you didn't pack lunch and have no time etc.

There is a decline for sure. Witnessed it in my family (seen the transition in 4 women). 'You stop giving a fuck' They all become much more comfortable being disagreeable.

Yes, this is good advice to men. I wish I learned this long ago, but only because I operate from a solutions mindset and fuck off all the women in my family. I had to preface most conversations early on with 'Do you need a solution or some advice, or is this just getting it off your chest?' You send women off the rails when you try to give unwanted advice. They will consider you lecturing and arrogant. They will also feel you disregarded their feelings as the solution you present is often interpreted as undermining them, instead of holding space for them. They want you to focus on sharing the experience and understanding. Sometimes I want to rant and offload - but I always preface by letting the person know its just that. No input needed. Again this is really rare for me, as I do all my emotional processing inside. If i want outside advice, its simply to check if I have considered all angles effectively.

Thoughts? Does Esther Perel resonate, or do you think she misunderstands the plight of men? She has experience that spans back before the modern era and it's tools. Do you all think we should adjust & accept technology and it's impact on our relationships? Or get out there and and relate to each other?

He's an alien in contact with NHI.

Nice Neon Genesis: Evangelion reference. But in all seriousness that series is a good look into the human condition, consciousness and God.

@Anton Rogachevski He's coming with the cinderblocks

I am being attacked But of course - Leo up there... surrounded by cinderblocks of truth, is his version of heaven! I stupendous oversight of my own thinking! I will attain absolution at a later date, in another conversation Honestly though it's been a delight, many lols were had !

Too much rap music? It is having an EFFECT Also a lot of my horrible metaphors, similes and language in general is picked up from Australian construction sites... I have to edit out 'c you next tuesday' here more than I like.

I laughed, I didn't expect the word dick to be inserted into the topic. Creative STAHP You could only ever date a woman who is a seasoned thinker - or another INTP. No one could take the cinderblocks that would rain down from hell

@RendHeaven It makes sense. NGL I walk the dog, go for runs, chop the foods, make the bed, order some doors... all the while questions such as these are germinating in the lizard brain. It is a pleasure to converse with everyone here on topics such as these.

Yes, definitely. Also, if we are attempting to interpret emotions as being true, or a tool/compass to truth... well there you go with human deception that you rap on about. Do we really think most people aren't so hopelessly self-deceived they can ascertain a true emotion? A higher order emotion that might point them to God? Lol. Fuck no. They would have no idea of the validity of it. It is easy to see why meditation, rigorous thought, psychedelics and inner clarity would have great use on the path to God & Truth. I know life isn't like a vending machine where you put good in and good comes out - but this is legit actually so bad. You have my compassion - and also - my respect. For not ending up a pilled, bitter motherfucker.

Well I can see how that is true in that example. But I don't think it is always the case that it is feelings VS truth. (BTW I do hope that isn't true, what a savage act)

@RendHeaven I think we are beginning to touch on how higher order emotions come into play with relation to God. Love etc....

Yes, exactly. This, for me, is where it gets murky. This is why I cannot come to the conclusion feelings ARE truth. It doesn't work. Someone getting so anxious over a social situation that they are having a panic attack? That feeling isn't true. There is an irrationality to our feelings that cannot be removed from this whole topic. This is where I feel emotional discernment in general, is so vital. If you can locate a TRUE emotion, if you can pull yourself apart and accurately realize that... Power. Power in knowing yourself. I think we are here to dig at the truth within, and emotions can assist here, as well as thought. This whole topic makes my brain turn inside out.

There is a functional truth to feeling & emotion (ie it has survival purposes). The masculine & feminine see truth and value it in different domains. If you are about to be shanked by some dickhead, fear is going to fucking motivate you. Fear is serving survival. Survival is truth. I see a lot of interplay between feelings & truth. I don't see feeling vs truth.

Apologies for the late reply @Carl-Richard - I wanted to do this answer the justice it deserves by thoroughly deconstructing my deconstruction process.. so to speak So, I work in commercial construction, so it is easiest for me to supply you all with a concept to illustrate the process (sorry to the concrete [LOL] thinkers). Imagine, if you will, a set of plans to build a 2 story building. When you go to the site to check out what latent conditions are present (your ego) it looks good. There is a little slab of concrete there ready to act as a footing, or stability structure, for your building. The soil looks pristine on the surface. So, you go in and begin building (your thoughts). You level the existing concrete and decide this will be the slab. You get the steel in, calculate loads and order the members needed to bear the weight of the building. You start building the walls with studs and tracks. Next, plaster. You are very proud and invested in what you have created here. You identify with your creation (thoughts). You progress through the build. It's going well, then suddenly, you run into 2 massive issues - you didn't check the soil. Or footing. The weight of the upper structure is too heavy for the base. It's going to topple. You also didn't core into the base you found to rough in pipes for the toilet and plumbing - SHIT. FUCK. Now you have to fucking rip the structure down. You need a geoengineer to test the soil. You need to rip up the concrete (your ego) so you can pour a new slab with a footing that can support what you are going to build on top. What a waste of time. Lucky that this building is just conceptual as otherwise this could be a $100,000 error. Back to deconstructive meditation: Your ego is at the core - that's the foundation of the build. The soil quality, the slab. There are hidden beliefs/assumptions there - just like there are latent conditions in the soil of our build. You absolutely need to know these conditions to be able to build the structure (your thoughts). Do you really want to found your understanding of consciousness on these potential landmines within you? It will topple at some point - and your entire understanding of reality will explode in your face (midlife crisis). As you further enter into the deconstruction process, you realize just how much you identify with your thoughts. So, the primary technique I employ is 'I am not XXX'. Realize just how much you identify with your thoughts and reasoning. These are the structure of your building. You have so much pride and ego in the building. Look at it! That shit is beautiful, the cladding! The door hardware! But as you deconstruct this, you realize you cannot even be sure your thoughts are your own! How do you know that is YOUR thought? You think it is yours because your ego identifies with it. Just look at half the people on this forum - they all post and when their thoughts are challenged, their ego is fucking TRIGGERED. They think they are their thoughts. They think thought is fundamental. This is an assumption. I digress... Following this deconstruction process 'I am not...' you eventually reach a state of empty. And once you reach that state, you make way for something else to come in. Something you can NEVER perceive with all the human bullshit that stands in your way. This is your own unique experience to reveal. This is the truth you are trying to get at within you. But you cannot ever reach this space if you are building some shit on top of a rotten base all the time. Constructing is a different tool. It can be useful. But meditation is for deconstructing.