Natasha Tori Maru

@LoneWonderer Australian bushland vibes. Sometimes I want to capture something of the arid land here, despite the lack of vibrancy and colour. This is the weaving I have been going at - I'll probably work off the metal triangle with finer threads and hang this piece of Tibetan quartz I have

I enjoy it - I simply wouldn't be here otherwise. Arguing is fine, so long as I am not so attached to my ideas 'MY IDEAS'. Just an idea - not mine. This helps remaining objective for me. I actually enjoy when my ego is prodded. There is always, always, always something to be learned. Biggest growth happens for me there. So, I do not shy away from some crabbiness. I just don't return to the forum for a bit. Mostly I just don't read a users reply if I think it will emotionally compromise me. Replying isn't winning. The person who had the last word isn't the winner. There are no winners. I do not tolerate anyone speaking down on others. Condescension or sly jabs. Overt insults don't rattle me, especially when out of character, because it is just the user at a bad moment in time. They could just be emptying and it isn't really meant to be directional. I feel a lot of pity and sadness they demean themselves with this language. Most people aren't arseholes. Maybe we just caught them on a bad day. But really insidious, twisted jabs disguised as political correctness, or users who are systematically dickheads are not good. Points to a deepset pathological issue. I suppose I have a different view of the forum because I am a Moderator. I have the added Moderator drama that adds to my experience. People take discipline/corporal punishment very personally, despite the objective nature of a lot of issues. The grey areas and murky decisions are the hardest. Many users will never agree with you. So moderating carries a more inherently loaded emotional experience - usually laced with negativity. I just take the bad feelings and transmute them into something good. Empty it out. I like this place full of all you weirdos! Even when I disagree. It is all just experience - why should I judge if it is good or bad? It does me no good. I do discern though. EXPERIENCE!

@LoneWonderer Oh my - DON'T STOP! I love the first one - I am a huge fan of architecture (of course lol, I build the shit) and brutalism is so underappreciated! @chisel This is brilliantly skilled work. What mediums did you use? A combination? A lot of skill in this render, particularly how you have mastered the soft shading gradients of the lashes and skin, while also rendering the harder clean details within the eye to really emphasis the glassy, mirror like nature of the eye. The reflection rendered in strict, clean white sets it off @Ramasta9 I really love these! I am a huge fan of mandala like images. I think I posted a mandala somewhere in this thread. Fractals, colours. Very attractive and striking. I am also glad you saved these ones, as it carries meaning considering AI has large power and water costs to the environment. I love AI used for art, but I hate when it is wantonly used for memes, stupid images etc. Big environmental costs. But these are worth the power & water <3 I have a confession - I HAVE BEEN SHOCKINGLY LAZY LATELY I have only done some doodles recently. Nothing finished. I have been teaching myself weaving/macrame as I have been flat out at work & life. I'll post my weaving experiments soon !

I tend to just do the process I described in my head. When we started to work with many different clients I recorded it down due to volume. Prior to this I was always fascinated with what motivates people, how they tick, how they make decisions and what their values/core needs are. My initial introduction to the process was, funnily enough, going through pretty extreme childhood trauma. Living with caretakers who had clinical pathologies (cluster B) I had to learn to read people so quickly. In a flash. My safety depended on my ability to do this, and pretzel myself into what that person needed in an effort to bring peace. Unfortunate beginnings that spawned my ability, and then interest. Recording has been quite interesting. I pick up more subtle patterns I sometimes miss. Micro-expressions happen in a flash. But they tend to reveal the most. I think you called it 'morally flexible', because to be frank, I used to be a manipulative cu**. Internet troll. Intentionally fucking with people. Arrogant and power hungry. I try to be a nice girl now This. I go with my first intuitive instinct. Sometimes I need to pause and consider - but this is mostly when I did not have a strong initial feeling to go on. The longer I take to answer, the less likely I will be accurate. This did take some time. Lots of inquiry around feeling, emotion. More than what is normally inquired about - we don't really like to deeply investigate our emotions, I have found. I had to build up trust in my feelings, and the truth to be found there. I have to know when a feeling is true, stemming from a belief, part of conditioning I haven't yet dissolved, false, or even when feelings are just vestigial limbs that are tacked onto thoughts that aren't relevant. I have to know precisely where my feeling or emotion is coming from, else I cannot trust it. Lots of reverse engineering internally. I think it definitely helps to be very open and non-judgmental with this process. We can never really, truly know what others are thinking, feeling. Their meaning or history. I am always open to not knowing and being wrong. Everyone has a different set of habits and tells. The longer you work with them, you build up a context around the person to better help you understand. But I always prepare for a surprise

@Carl-Richard 35/36 What does this mean? I know I am an excellent profiler of people. My dad actually sends me to meetings just to scope out body language and facial expression. My colleague does all minutes so I can focus on that. Then I speak to stakeholders one on one in follow-up video calls under the guise of general clarity and agendas. I use AI to record the conversation and profile them, take notes regarding what they emphasise, how the conversation is directed and what they volunteer as information unprompted. These are the keys to subconscious motivations. Then after first meeting, I submit a small profile of each stakeholder. This helps us develop relationships with these members, because often we work with them repeatedly across projects because they really enjoy working with us. I'll admit it's a lot of manipulation, but it's for a good cause (building hospitals within budget, time and to maximum profit). I've been almost 100% correct with my profiles so far. One guy totally had me stumped though, be was so emotionally and expressively flat I couldn't really gauge his needs. We work with these project managers/architects/consultants and clients for a year at a time. Sometimes more. So it is worth the time investment. This all comes quite naturally to me, so it is not an effort to do on top of my usual work because I am fascinated by what motives people. Due to the above I am really unsure if I fit any sort of label...

I didn't even notice 🙃 Identifying as female is so low on my radar I do often miss inclusive type stuff.

No, found. I must say, it is on the nasty, vitriolic side for a meme. Someone was upset when the made it 💀 She looks spiritually constipated to me. Strained smile. Bit of uncanny valley with the over emphasised chin, mouth, teeth. And smile that doesn't extend to the eyes. Overall a deranged meme 🤣

Quite the claim. Burden of proof.

@theleelajoker To be clear I'm not shitting on concepts/ideas/labels or thought. They have their use and they are absolutely an asset. But we if are talking spiritual process, freeing, acceptance, integration, ending unnessecary suffering and awakening - as you start to dissolve conditioning we see how these things act to fuck everything up. So you learn exactly when to throw them away, and when you use them. It also becomes very clear when others are using them to identify with ego, centralising experience. Rather than dissolving the subject / object relationship we have and being within experience in a nonlocal, free way. No judgement. Only discernment. It's like seeing the clouds and saying 'those are MY clouds, MY sky' 'MY ideas, MY thoughts' Not sure if this resonates with you? I think you understand this part of the path ❤️

How come you were unable to see your shadows without the label?

Yeah, it seems to be the actual root issue behind the surface discussion regarding labels/concepts/ideas. It's not about ND not ND. NT not NT. It could be anything. It's the underlying theme behind the human drive towards concept/idea/label in an attempt to seek existential meaning. Without investigating what meaning is, in an of itself. There appears to be attachment present. And reassurance / relief from said attachment. Evidence by emotional attribution. This is actually counter to equinimity. There's a huge mix of users who are more direct experience based, and those more concept/thought based. Sometimes there isn't the realisation the concept/thought/idea/label acts as a cataract between the eyes and the vision/truth. This is a heavy model/concept thread. I am aligned with your view. But I don't want to engage, pick my battles etc 🥹

I suppose the thread title is also a misnomer - no one needs to be fixed. No one is broken. We are all valid as we are, without having to prove it, fit in. Or show worth...

How come we cannot accept ourselves without a label/concept/idea ? Perhaps we look too much to society to tell us what is right, rather than within.

Rofl Prescribed shrubs

Do you prefer practical in-camera effects during filming (SFX) or digital effects post-production (VFX)? I understand many like both - but this is about what you prefer Might be interesting to add your age too! For demographics. VFX examples: CGI creatures CGI/Digital environments Green/Blue screen compositing De-aging actors/adding makeup Blending Motion Capture SFX examples: Explosions (controlled pyrotechnics on location Weather effects on-set Animatronics/puppets Stunts Stop Motion animation There is a bit of overlap with stop motion/motion capture as both effects require SFX & VFX to pull off. I consider stop motion animation to be more SFX though.

@PolyPeter You may enjoy a lot of Peter Ralston (if you have not already heard of him). His delivery is forceful, emotive, passionate and earnest. Candid. Some cannot get past that. But if you can, he has a lot to say about beliefs. It is an asset to be able to make a distinction between a truth and a belief. Regardless, both are an asset/have use. In my opinion

Oh wow thank you - this is additional context that changes a lot! Will think on this. Other users might find your addition above useful also

How balanced his outlook is for an Olympia BB winner. You often hear these extremist '1%' Rich Piana mentality types who blast test and ruin their bodies. Dorian was meticulous. His emphasis is on REST over endless training. But when he was IN the gym he went incredibly hard for the small time he was there. He took extensive notes of all his workouts, compiled them, and analysed them over time to create a protocol. I think it was rather pioneering as there was not as much information as widely available regarding the sport as there is today. In the later phases of his life, he went to a balanced quality/longevity type health approach. He wanted to win - but not at any cost. I admire his drive, commitment, single minded ambition, but also the balance and spiritual work he does. The most intriguing parts for me, in terms of what was presented as new information in this particular interview, were his comments on consciousness work! He has taken a lot of psychedelics for this purpose. I believe it is timestamped. But from his words, emphasis and realizations - he sounds God realised!

The problem with humans is we can detect/interocept acute, subjective issues and reasonably isolate them well. The contrast in state is immediate and obvious. Holy fuck my arm is broken. The insidious nature of low level, chronic creep of lowered quality of life means we cannot as easily use this contrast in state to deduct its origin, or when it became so bad. Something something frogs in boiling water. The only way to answer if one is under stress due to chronic/habitual use, is to try eliminating it. Experience is the greatest teacher.

@Shermaningeorgia where did I say you cannot express yourself? Outside forum guidelines. And to be clear, that is the guidelines speaking. Quote please You can challenge me all you like, it doesn't bother me and there is no rule against it. I never said you could not. Present a quote.

It plays a big part, in my experience. There is a dark night of the soul that often smacks you about for a bit prior to the process taking over. Many people stop there.

To end unnecessary suffering. Peace. It feels natural. No force. No neuroticism like with 'self improvement'. Open, in attached exploration and questioning without conditioned beliefs. The process just resolves itself as we go. Experience no longer feels localised - it is just happening. Without the construction of the 'I am the experiencer' as a result of subject/object collapse, the egoic reactions seems to resolve themselves in a (to me) surprising way! I think it is really important to have meta awareness of our thoughts through mindfulness/meditation. You can begin to reverse engineer a feeling from a thought, and assess if the thought is a belief. Resolve the belief (if it no longer serves) and the feeling lessons to the point we can respond over react. Requires being deeply in touch with feelings and thinking. See clearly when a feeling or emotion is in response to survival, an egoic manifestation, or even completely false originating from fantasising about a future event that doesn't exist. The feelings all point to something. I think it is my job to figure that out, to reduce unnecessary mind chatter and suffering. Meditation helped me so much. Diving into thought and feeling, equally.

In terms of our emotional/feeling responses reactivity I agree with you there. That initial whip-crack feeling is usually correct, if we are grounded and relatively whole within our truth. I think the key takeaway is widening the gap between the trigger and the choice to take action, when it is an egoic/small-self responce. But there are elements of our survival and base nature that require a fast response. Fear as in example. To run from danger. This is why I think our emotional/feeling responses are more intelligent that our minds/thoughts. You see a tiger; your fear prompts you to fucken MOVE faster than a thought can do that. There is some nuance to this topic I need to think on further. Good one for contemplation!

This is a question for you, a good inquiry one. It isn't so intentional (not for me, anyway) - awareness just slowly and naturally cleans it up after awakening. Neurotic for me, implies overthinking. There isn't so much thinking involved in that way because you don't enter the cleanup phase with and end goal in mind. It ends up being a process of life. Something to be engaged with in the absence of 'completion'. Observation, realisation - maybe I can change this and see what happens? - exploration of experienced results. I think there isn't a goal or intention. Awareness begins the cleanup when you see through the illusion; the illusion sort of breaks its tight grip once you see through the ego self. I think this is the initial rock pulled away that can lead to little avalanches of change. You react, but you aren't taken away into the grip of it so as to feel out of control. There is peace in non-reactivity. You respond, not react. And the responding carries less attachment than the reacting. I feel it in my body differently - the responding feels deliverate, grounded, slower, cleaner, aligned. Not about winning. Like I am pausing, choosing my words and reacting on values/principal. Prior to this I would react and feel it as automatic, emotion led and fast/sloppy/defensive. It felt like it happened outside of my control. In both reaction/response there is a body grounded feeling, but the response does not carry all the weighty attachments of the ego. In no way was it about being better by not reacting. I feel that is a fantasy. Responding feels like it widens the gap between trigger and choice. The flavour of feeling, being, emotion is DEFINITELY still here. Feeling and emotion should NEVER be deleted in the spiritual process. Something is very very wrong if it is.