caspex

As soon as you take this question seriously you miss the entire point

I value information so I can work on it. I'd rather he focus his energy and time on insights rather than making his videos more interesting. I see where you are coming from though. It can get quite boring. But I believe it's better that way. Because that boredom asks you every minute, do you really care about this information? Do you really value this? Are you sure you want to watch this? In a way it's a test of whether you're worthy lol. I don't mean this in a gate keeping sense. This is just what life does. Whenever you want to achieve something life keeps asking you whether you are sure, just like this. If he were to make content that was really watchable and miraculously also packed with insights, those who are not ready would likely misunderstand the insights badly and hurt themselves worldview wise. In fact, if you're not ready there would indeed be no point in receiving that info. And if I am able to sit through 2 hours that tells I am ready to apply what I just heard.

A Therapist helps you solve your problems. A Guru helps you solve the problems you didn't even know you had. A Therapist helps you achieve a healthy ego self. A Guru helps you destroy your ego self. A Therapist helps you come back up to average. A Guru helps you go beyond average. A Therapist helps you gain the ability to have fun in life. A Guru helps you gain the ability to feel bliss in life. A Therapist makes you a functioning member of society. A Guru shows you how society is dysfunctional. A Therapist can't do what a Guru can do. A Guru can do what a Therapist can do. A Therapist helps the weakest and the most crippled. A Guru helps the 'strongest' and the most intellectual. A Therapist helps you detangle your psychological problems. A Guru helps you detangle yourself. A Therapist shows you how to get out of your own way. A Guru shows you you are the way. A Therapist helps you love yourself. A Guru helps you love yourself deeper. A Therapist helps you up the spiral till green at most. A Guru takes you from Green to maybe beyond. A Therapist helps you become sane. A Guru helps you go insane. A Therapist loves helping people overcome themselves. A Guru loves helping himself overcome himself. You get the point. A Guru is basically an upgraded Therapist. A Therapist even the most mentally sound need.

What I have heard is that Zen meditators who have trained 20+ years in meditation can consistently establish left right brain synchronization at will. What this means is you can do shit like astral projection or whatever psychic stuff at will ig. This is written in the Gateway Process CIA Document so take that for what you will. My point for bringing this up is that if you are at a point where you can do literal astral travel, Clairevoyancy, precognition, channeling and telepathy at will, you're also probably enlightened, lol. What I have also heard in yogic circles is that even a man who wants to live the ordinary life should meditate a minimum of 2.5 hours a day. Which is 10% of the day. This was also accompanied by them saying one should donate 10℅ of their monthly/yearly earnings. (Maybe wooing people to donate to them?) So take that for what you will as well. These are the things I have heard. My advice, meditate for as long as you can everyday. But do it consistently. And never go shorter than what you have done the previous day.

Could be anything

Note: I am not gonna kill myself. Don't worry. That said. I feel that the only thing stopping me is that statement above. Which is fueled by the fear of death. Not just physical but metaphysical death. The reason I am afraid of suffering is because it will lead to my metaphysical death. Eternal suffering will do it even faster. So since it comes down to that one fear of death, if dulled greatly, what would stop me? Why would I NOT do it? Fear of missing out on the rest of my life? In God's POV an experience of suicide is just as valuable as a lifetime of experiences. Why? Because quantity and quality, time, they are all human concepts. I feel it's that I won't have a choice if the fear of death was to be removed on all levels. I'll just disintegrate or some shit. Because even on a physical level all your cells are afraid of dying so they act in a way to stay alive and ultimate work together to sustain your body. Same is with your mind. And most subtly with your awareness, that I think has to do with energetic biases. On such a level, only thing that would stop me from dissolving, would be an attachment. Why? Because attachment and fear are two sides of the same coin. The coin called Bias. Bias is what keeps YOU alive as an isolated consciousness. But bias is what makes you suffer. Bias helps you to survive but ultimately leads to you removing it, and dissolving. Eg. You are afraid of suffering so much that you find a way to remove the fear itself one day. This means that God doesn't pull you towards itself for dissolution, it's just a byproduct of the ingenious design of God. Like how parallel lines on a sphere will meet at the poles. It's not that something is pulling those lines together, it's because of the design of the surface itself. It's inevitable. You can try to sustain your fear of death in efforts to stay alive{because you're afraid of death}. To be afraid of something means to avoid it. But if you avoid it too well, by removing the fear, you'll die. So you have to avoid it artificially where you just leave so that the fear can bite you in the ass another time. So the only way to avoid artificially is through distractions. The lower consciousnesses can do this very well. Another way is to remove your fear of metaphysical death but substitute it with another bias, an attachment. This is what, I think, higher consciousnesses do. They will consciously choose attachments to keep surviving. Ultimately it will make no difference whether you choose to live eternally or dissolve. Making it a paralyzing decision. Nothing is stopping you from killing yourself, but nothing is stopping you from not killing yourself. Why would you do either? This is what I need help with. Can some help me draw a conclusion about the paralyzing nature of decisions.

Logic is subjective. God can make anything make perfect sense while also disproving it. And have that make perfect sense as well. It's pure insanity. To the point that to try to draw any conclusion is a fool's errand. Yes, even all of what I have just said.

Assuming as true the validity of "Autobiography of a Yogi" by Paramahansa Yogananda. In it, mention is of Lahiri Mahasya, Guru of Yogananda's Guru. Apparently he was both an enlightened individual (conscious to a degree where miracles were no big deal) and a householder. Precisely for the reason to show people that it's possible. So personally I feel that yes socializing and the current society will pull you down like crabs in a bucket. And that yes one needs to withdraw at first to raise their baseline. But I think at one point you're consciousness becomes so powerful that people cannot simply just pull you down. Instead you pull them up just by existing. I believe it's something within me if I can't stay conscious within an unconscious environment. I do not want to blame 'people' and 'society' for my own shortcomings. As for whether socializing itself is harmful? I believe not. Because if both in a relationship are highly conscious, they will propel each other higher and higher using each other's weight. This is incredibly rare because such a dynamic would require the collective entity that is their relationship(not just each of them individually), to be at a stage that is immediately able to require self-deception. Usually both the parties in any kind of socialization have some shortcomings no matter how many spiritual attainments they hold. These self-deceptions then, instead of higher consciousness, are boosted by people coming together. Think about it, when people come together the collective entity that is formed is lower consciousness the more the people. If the collective itself was say, at a stage such as Turquoise, then it would act as a propellent for the individuals within, it will not become a cult to hold people in to keep surviving as that collective entity it is. This is what I believe.

Later on in the episode it is explained that since he was a naturally aggressive kid, as he was growing up, he was punished every time he did anything 'bad'. So over time he learned to repress his anger and eventually became unable to express it. So I think it's not that he likes feeling like a saint, but rather he only feels 'normal' when he is repressing his anger. He seems to be at the Conformist stage rather than the Expert stage.

tl;dr don't be wordy if they don't ask for it

Unreliable, Untrustworthy, Irresponsible Unwilling, Weak Determination Manipulative, Narcissistic, Insecure Denial, Ignorance Honestly, a shitty friend many times. Selfish, Scared of showing compassion to a stranger Bad Socially, Too Quite Afraid to Genuinely Smile in Public Scared of many things Blames outside circumstances Too Judgmental etc. etc. I don't hate myself for any of it, the reason I am able to think up all that is because I know I am working on them. And the reason I am able to do that is because I love myself enough to grow myself.

A true friend is another human, who you are one with, in a non-romantic non-familial way. To become a better friend. You have to be: More Humble, More Authentic, More Loving, More Caring, More Self-Sacrificing, More Healthily-Supportive, More Curious, More Independent, More Vulnerable, More Reliable, More Responsible, More Passionate, Funnier, More Relatable, More Punctual, More understanding, More conscious, More Present, More Available, Better Listener... and the list goes on. Less Narcissistic, Less Clingy, Less Jealous, Less Judgmental, Less Hateful, Less Selfish, Less Needy, Less Dependent, Less Shy, Less Overly-Selfless, Less I-Like-Talking-About-Myself, Less I-Hate-Talking-About-Myself, Less Conceited, Less Talkative, Less Quite... and the list goes on even further. In short, just be a more integrated human being.

I talk to myself a lot and sometimes at night in the mirror I do stuff that if others saw, I will be seen as insane. All this is to say that the entities and selves within you are multiple. You evolve through life as a personality by building new ones and shedding old ones. But that doesn't mean that the old selves are not still there. Maybe they are tucked away in some corner of your heart waiting to be noticed. Not only this, but you can also tap into archetypes that feel incredibly different from whatever you have experienced. The more you channel certain archetypes the easier it becomes to connect deeper with them later. In my experience, I never feel like I am someone else or anything like that, I just feel as if I am talking to myself. However one side is wildly different than the other. The most intense experience I have ever had related to this was on accident. I fell asleep in the afternoon by chance and managed to notice the 'fall' before you lose consciousness and fall asleep. Because of that I was still conscious but inside the 'dream world'. It wasn't visual at all. But auditory. I talked with someone else who felt like someone else. It's crazy. The mind is crazy. When Carl Jung said that exploring the unconscious and active imagining is like underwater diving into the seas of the unconscious, he wasn't kidding. When you're in that state it literally feels as if you're underwater and when you are waking back up it feels as if you are coming back up to the surface. The similarity is uncanny. That's all I have to say.

This practice is for those who have reached ego death sober and remember how to get back into that state. If that describes you it's likely your next goal is to permanently settle in this state or at least be able to induce it instantly and maintain it for as long as you want. For this there is a great practice. Join your hands in prayer and meditate until you reach back to that state of ego dissolution. BAM! As soon as you die throw a punch forward! Then come back in the position of prayer and mediate till you reach that state again. Each and every time throw a punch. Do this till you throw a 100 Punches and call it a day. It's important you do at least a 100 punches because if it takes you 1 min of meditating just to reach the ego dissolution state sober than that'd take you about 100 minutes. You'd certainly not appreciate the boredom and aim to reach dissolution faster! At some moments you'll accidently settle in ego dissolution long enough to throw 2 punches. It's great practice because eventually you'll get so fast at inducing ego dissolution you're practically dead. Because the more you go into that state the weaker your ego gets. This can be applied not just with ego death but with other states of consciousness you wish to embody. You should also increase the amount of punches per day if you get very fast at finishing the prayer or just want to practice longer. I tried this method today(5 hours ago) and it's really effective. I am still in a light state. Method inspired from Netero(from HxH series)

I think you need more sober awakenings and increase your baseline that way.

@Devin Well it's all about the effort to make an unbiased decision. But that's impossible to do because of survival. So we draw the line at survival. That the only bias we will have is towards survival and surviving only. That's why many might want to go live alone.

@Devin If you have a spiritual ego you likely feel superior to those who are of less spiritual nature. Which is, let's be honest, basically everyone. So because of that, it's often times the same as having a superiority complex. So you would often point out the faults of others but won't notice yours even though you like to think that you do. You'd have pride that you would deny possessing. Classic manipulation to eventually make the people you associate with your disciples and you the teacher. Basically being a narcissist to some degree. And of course, thinking you are humble. You'd also have a fear that someone who is less spiritual will point out your insecurities. You'd rather find them on your own. But ofcourse you'd deny having this fear, call it something else or say that this is how it should be.

@Devin Simply surround yourself with people who aren't spiritual, might even see spirituality as woo woo nonsense, but are nonetheless emotionally intelligent and honest. They will let you know when you're developing a superiority complex or a spiritual ego. Because when you are developing that it shows clearly to anyone who is emotionally intelligent and if that friend is honest to you they'll let you know how much manipulation you're doing without even realizing. Because that BS that you'll do would be annoying as hell. Don't trap yourself in a spiritual bubble. You can go live alone and experiment with that but trapping yourself in some spiritual bubble with spiritual friends and romantic interests is the recipe to falsehood. You need people who challenge your insecurities, tell you your faults, and oppose your views no matter how wrong they are. Because these are the people who will push you to higher understanding of what you believe, if you what you believe isn't false. Keep in mind loads of people who are emotionally intelligent will look emotionally dumb for the first few weeks of being friends. It's very hard to recognize contrary to what people might think. Someone who you might think is too asleep and ignorant may end up being the one who dissolves your spiritual ego. Don't underestimate people.

Both approaches require control over the mind. So it's just the same thing but different aspects are being emphasized. In no mind, you have control over the mind, so you can shut it down. In befriending your mind, you have control over the mind, so you can feel increased self-love and security, etc.

Maybe you're suffocating yourself when you're inside that state? Seems like a common problem when entering samadhi. Remember to breathe. If not then it's most likely some emotional blockage or mental blockage that prevents you from feeling the joy. I mean you are even feeling light in the chest. That's how samadhi feels at the start. Here's what you should do imo if it's not the breathing problem. Keep dipping into this state to find the blockages that prevent you from feeling the joy. Don't give up on it yet.

Transcending cringe requires understanding cringe. Cringe is just disgust but more physical in nature. Disgust is a type of hatred which specializes in avoidance. If you cringe at something, you want to avoid it at all costs. When it comes to cringing at behaviors of other humans, that happens because you are too self centered. When you see those actions, instead of compassion, you feel disgust as you'd never want to be like that. The same is true for cringing at behaviors of your past self. Since you never want to be like that, but you were like that, it connects you to being that person, you feel even more disgust and an urge to get away from that reality of you once being like that. This makes you cringe even harder. In reality, you don't need to, and shouldn't, cringe at your past self to signify your growth to yourself. You can easily see that you have grown without feeling any disgust. How this will happen is, when you look at your past behaviors you'll see the difference between you right now and you then. But that's about it. No cringe. Knowing all this, the method to transcending cringe is: 1: Be less self-centered by having more experiences that are humbling. 2: Whenever you catch yourself cringing, dissolve the hatred and attempt to love.

(P.S This is more of a rant from pent up annoyance of years but I genuinely don't know what to do in such a situation and would like some advice.) If it's some stranger asking me I'd just say either yes or no depending on the context since it wouldn't have any consequences. But if a friend asks me this, saying either yes or no comes with further assumptions and it's own set of questions. If I say I don't believe in God, they drown me in assumptions they have of Athiests, if I say Yes, they ask what's my religion. In reality I usually go with saying I am Agnostic but that has it's own set of problems as well, because it doesn't matter if they are Athiest or Religious, they try to 'convert' me because I haven't 'made up my mind'. They obviously realize not to force it and as good friends they don't want to force anything. But over years and months of talking and hanging out together you can notice how blatant it is that they wish you convert. This gets annoying. When someone asks this question they don't want a long answer. I have tried explaining my viewpoint but at the end it's all for nothing. "So.. you do believe in God". What's more unfortunate is that most religious types don't distinguish properly between belief and knowing, so explaining anything becomes convoluted. I'd rather not go through the hassle if I am honest, because even after the explanation, my viewpoint is just thought of as weird(It's blatant). And who knows what will happen if I told any of them "I am God, and so are you". Most my friends are either religious or Agnostic. And the agnostics are really the ones that are the most chill since they don't really care so they never ask. I would happily explain my viewpoint if my friend is willing to understand, but I don't really want to each time a friend asks as it takes times and comes with a lot of questions. What's a short answer? What's the best answer in your opinion?

Will has nothing do with the individual, but it exists

The things I have found online talking about this are usually biased towards Service to Others path. Is their any sources you can link me to or anyone who you think teaches this Polarity intentionally or unintentionally? I feel that this way it'd be easier to gain an understanding to what it truly feels like to advance on this path. I also appreciate any links to clips of shows or movies, songs, anime, manga, etc. that you think capture the negative polarity well. FYI, I don't mean just plain evil shit. It's more like someone who is awakened enough to know reality is one and nothing matters, but chooses to use that to do 'bad' stuff instead because they never go for opening their heart and instead block it off completely. Anything that is in service to their self. Anything that empowers their 'self'. Such as making someone submit to them.

@JuliusCaesar The usual roadmaps I see of spiritual progress are of Service to Others, you have any idea how one for Service to Self would go? Do you think the basis of the negative polarity is in feeling infinitely separate(same as unification, but this facet doesn't include any love)? What's your opinion on this: "For 3D beings to polarize negatively, the goal is to solidify the ego so much that it breaks and there is a recognition of absolute sovereignty/power/authority. In this, the phrase "I AM ME" or "I AM" has a different meaning than what it is on the positive polarity. Since such a being feels separate from everything, it has no sense of guilt, in fact it's seen as something to be transcended. Morality is realized to be relative and in this way one sees there is no reason to stop themselves from getting what they want. Impulses are not restrained unless out of fear of punishments. Although impulses could be a big part of their life, they are not controlled by them. One negatively polarizes by expanding their ego onto others and therewhich increasing power. The only way to do this is by making the other submit their free will, and their ego to you. In this way you expand your self, which is very different to how Service To Others does it, as there they merge with each other(dissolve away) instead. Fear is also seen as a major thing to transcend just like on Service To Others path. One who is consciously on the negative polarity path, can also transcend suffering by the recognition of absolute authority(God) and further negative polarization. It's not suffocating to be on this path as one can be in a constant state of bliss from one's own power if polarized enough. As the positive polarity finds bliss in otherselves(love), the negative polarity finds bliss in the self(power)."