mandyjw

@tsuki I didn't know that, I was trying to go back to this thread and find it. Instead I found this, On 4/2/2019 at 6:56 AM, Leo Gura said: "Don't be a smartass with me." "This was so right and so perfect too. Reconcile right and wrong within yourself. Don't ask others to do it, they can't do it for you. They are you. " I don't even remember why I wrote that, what did it have to do with Leo or the thread? Was it a note to future self? Is this why I cling to Christianity, because I'm terrified of having no moral structure anymore, especially with the awareness that everything I do is for my survival?

@now is forever Because you fragment yourself. You integrated, integrated and integrated and now you want to stop. Look at the "female topic" post. That is what she thinks are appropriate female topics? Please. Don't. Leave. Me.

@K VIL Just watch it I guess.

I used to have pet rabbits when I was a kid, I know that look exactly. Don't cling to your online identity, tell us your name. Group dynamics and color coding is so stage yellow. We need to integrate all the stages. I went back to my generic apple avatar for you. I wasn't nearly ready to put my face on here, it felt so gross you don't even know.

When you have kids, they become fragments of yourself and life will give you the very pieces that you cannot accept about yourself along with a biological drug-like attachment and fierce love for them. Kids tear you apart literally and figuratively. @tsuki Hi.

@Angelo John Gage Yes, but still we are under the illusion of time so that we can create things, so we have past memories and past desires that take multiple lifetimes to fulfill. When you renounce desire and renounce time you awaken to bigger desires and a sense of urgency. Tick tock tick tock tick tock

It's very difficult as a woman, to believe that Buddha was more woke than Jesus. Buddha resisted letting women into Buddhism. Jesus had Mary Magdalene as a disciple and she even wrote her own Gospel, which is an awesome nondual read if you feel inclined. So yeah, sorry, Jesus was more woke than Buddha.

@kieranperez Oh, you're calling me full of shit again. I'll be indebted to you forever for the first time you said that to me, in response to my post about being a mother to my kids and connecting with them at birth. That sliced through my ego and was a knife to the heart like nothing else. It's funny how full circle this conversation is going. I have a lot of growing to do. So do we all. I do badly need to balance my time on the forum but something really strange is happening here right now, maybe something I've waited my whole lives for and I can't look away. Real life and internet are another duality, after all.

@lmfao We are ALL connected. So, so very impossibly, beautifully connected.

@Leo Gura You're still scared of becoming Jesus, but that's what you are. They won't crucify you this time, I promise. Buddha held back. Mother Earth doesn't have time for that shit.

Unconscious frustration/indulgence> renunciation > conscious enjoyment/acceptance of what is and what is not Peter Ralston just posted this video today. I don't see the need to call Jesus a Buddhist, but if it makes you happy, whatever. I love the chuckle after he says "when you make the eyes in the place of the eye" BY THE WAY PETER, he didn't just hang out in the desert reading scripture, he was tempted by the Devil for 40 days and 40 nights.

"All understanding is metaphoric." -Leo

Yep, obsession with past lives is definitely a survival strategy. I'll be me. God damn it. I'll never get rid of this name.

Jesus knew that he was going to mess things up for a while, there are several verses where he predicted it. But things would have been much worse if he hadn't. An imperfect understanding of his teachings was better than none at all for most of history, spiral dynamics explains pretty well why that is the case. Now 2000 years later we are much more evolved and have the connection of the internet and many more people have their basic survival needs met. Love is patient and love is kind, God is patient and God is kind. Jesus never really spoke of a hell the way it is taught in Christianity. It's worth it to me. It's all I ever wanted.

Oh my God, I was her! I thought I was him but I was her. Eva. Eve. Life. And he is a mason, an architect and most importantly a healer.

Oh my God the bunny, I've been noticing bunnies, I always hated that in Monty python, I went down to the stream from the cemetary a week ago and found a fox hole with the remains of a white bunny by it.

@now is forever Too late. Spirit of place awakened me and wants something in return. @Truth Addict Her. I love her. Yes, I forget sometimes.

@Brenzo2 The number 666 applied significance to me. That's the awareness we're all cultivating, so that we can build something great, a paradise without it turning into a hell. Everyone is terrified of becoming Hitler, myself included. But fear never served anyone or anything.

@now is forever Jesus told him, "Anyone who puts a hand to the plow and then looks back is not fit for the Kingdom of God." I'm not giving up. I've never been able to give up on what I love. I have to learn to balance and integrate it with my real life. I will and I am. I don't have to support myself, I already paid off my house and I can be a housewife if I want. It would be easy just to give up and be the well balanced highly effective yet isolated person I was before. This is going to hurt like hell, but it's also what I really really want. It's what God wants and I owe him something still. When my mission is done and my purpose is fulfilled I can leave.

@now is forever You're one of the only ones who mutually understands how to converse nondualy and now you're lraving. This happened too quick and I keep feeling crazy. Everyone I interact with is my higher self or a shadow mirror or both. Please don't leave. We all need to learn to reconcile the dualities of in person connection and real life and our online connections. It's too late to choose one or the other.

@Leo Gura So says the guy I've been listening to for years so I can be worthy of the world's love. I am the punchline of a cosmic joke. Are you laughing? I just went for a walk in the woods and saw a 6 on a tree just like your 666 on your wall in the video I watched today. I thought it was a spiral when I first saw it but it's actually a 6.

AHHHHHH!!!!! My name means "worthy of love" and I've always hated it. I don't want to be a nameless being. Or maybe I do.

Oh, it's because I needed to create them that way in the past, neither very male nor very female. That's all.

@Nahm Holy fuck.