mandyjw

What's really interesting is that it was written with Yoko, I read, so it would have been a shared struggle I guess.

Nagging is something that happens in relationships because we start to focus on what we don't want rather than what we do. So her nagging can be exacerbated if you focus on it. Try bringing something fun and unexpected into your relationship, pick some wildflowers for her, draw a corny cartoon as a joke, whatever. The more you focus on those connecting things, the less the nagging gets focused on, the happier she is and the more the spontaneous, free romantic stuff is getting her attention the less she nags.

If I want to paint my face and dance, I do it for me, John, no one makes me.

I drink less than a cup a day (incredibly caffeine sensitive) and I'll quit it for a time and pick it back up again. It seems I get the most enjoyment out of it that way. After drinking it everyday for a long time the energy I get starts to feel disgusting and irritating but when I start after a break again it feels amazing. Might have to do with the adrenal system, who knows.

I think being really well educated in this area is really helpful. When you know enough about a religion to be able to deepen or shake up people's understanding of it, they tend to leave you alone. I'm still insulted that the Jehovah's Winesses haven't come back since our last conversation...

Con fuse. "The adjective comes from confuse, which has a Latin root, confundere, "mingle together."" Whoever knew confusion could be so sexy? It's like a great big party of life or something.

A woman's/alien's/whatever's highest purpose is to confuse a man so he forgets what he thinks he knows and can feel the clarity that he really is.

Oooohh, see she is a beautiful sign that that itself is something you want to embody. Go get in touch with that playful, carefree, lust for life part of yourself. Studying the law of attraction if you're open to it might be really helpful too. When we are intensely attracted to someone, it means we really want to merge with or embody something they are reflecting to us. Sex might happen or might not, who knows. The better we are at figuring out what the deeper attraction really is and adjust our attitudes, the luckier we get. But by that point you won't care so much about it because you'll feel fulfilled anyway. Life just gets better and better. Allow your desires, but be open to seeing that things are not always just what they seem to be.

Yep, that's the grand revelation. It doesn't mean anything, but I see the distinction between what Leo is pointing to in levels of consciousness, which also actually isn't really a distinction at all but freedom of expression in creation. Unfortunately we can only talk to one another and discuss this sort of thing if we chose a particular perspective. The connection can be mutually felt, even if words and intentions seem different. My connection with the doctor was just one of resonance and love. Reading his life story broke my reality because it was a "true" story and I saw the psychical evidence, but his story was a mystical one and I couldn't deny it was true in my heart. Going down the rabbit hole is just when you align and resonate with love so strongly or purely that what you think of as you ceases to be. Some people have that sort of connection with aliens. The aliens, the transmissions, the psychedelics, the clairvoyant doctors are just all fantastic Self-created manifestations of love. We already are all channeling. I speak to my higher self, I have both a Calvin and a Hobbes in my head. Sometimes Calvin pretends to be Hobbes though. Gotta watch out for that.

Coming from a religious background, I think aliens are a refreshing change from hundreds of years of the tradition of various men claiming to be the mouth piece of God.

You already look into the void whenever you look deep into someone's eyes. Even the center pupils are just black holes that we imagine are the depth of their being, and it is. And it is love, because love is the only thing that is neither something nor nothing.

You know how I had that weird connection with the clairvoyant doctor from the 1800's and read his life story? His awakening coincided with getting really sick and depressed, losing consciousness randomly then beginning channeling while falling asleep. He was really open-minded, loving and deeply connected with life, but I doubt that liberation was a known potential. Likewise many people can channel but don't embody or have waking knowledge of what they channel, the embodiment is maybe just an expectation we impose on the person. The Course in Miracles was channeled by someone who didn't deeply embody that. I just think the fact that that's possible is beautiful.

I think it's actually kind of cool that some people are seemingly randomly given gifts they don't understand.

Sometimes I get excited about posting videos. This one was exiting to make but since then I want to hide under a rock. I have cognitively distanced myself so much I don't even remember what I said really, so here you go, here's some sort of fuckery of some kind.

Everything seems to hinge on allowing what's wanted, and the non reality of what is not wanted feeling awful to focus on, because it's not true and cannot be focused on. It merges right in with acceptance of what is, and the actual nature of what is. I wrote this reply and the depths of understanding this in other areas my life are still filling in. So incredibly thankful for the conversations I have here, which end up being illuminating in so many unexpected ways.

Listening to one of those mysterious free book box tapes. Women develop a sense of self in relationship through others. Insights that make you want to throw up cause you're SO ready for them, but not quite ready.

@Raze I know and don't mean to shame you for it or anything, just honestly ask yourself if that's what you really want to do. A lot of the time we downplay and do what you suggest with what we want, whether it be a nice car or a house on the ocean, etc, to make the belief that we can't have it more tolerable. Then we wonder why nothing satisfies us later on in life, and never question our beliefs about it. You're completely right, the OP is telling himself a fiction in his head about the girl, but changing the fiction in his head in this way ( in my opinion), will yield unsatisfying results, not just for him but for the women he has future relationships with. Those thoughts become reality and energy, and she will be susceptible to think herself to be less than satisfactory too. That doesn't make for hot sex or a passionate relationship.

There's a type of manic pixie girl, disney princessesque happiness and in the vortex, connected with source excitement that once the mind brings in the idea of other, weakness, the weaker gender and threat, turns into what feels like vulnerability and fear. I think the mind is extremely dramatic about what might happen to it, when it's really just afraid of being silly and ashamed of itself. Ouch! The LOA marriage book I read suggests just saying "ouch" when your partner says something that hurts rather than retaliating. My husband is almost always really kind, but own mind is real bad mother fucker, so I still needed that marriage advice.

You need to find some other area in your life that you're really interested in and go in that area. Career, hobby, interests, skills. Women are wired to be attracted to this. "Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills." - Napolean Dynamite Seriously though, they don't want to be responsible for your only fulfillment in life because they know they won't be enough, and they don't want to disappoint you. Once you get what you want, you'll be empty. Then she'll feel used. Girls like to make happy fulfilled men even more happy and fulfilled. It's the same way with men, you probably are only attracted to her because she is so playful and carefree about it, that's just how attraction works.

@Raze What you're suggesting is demeaning and degrading a woman in your mind in order to repress your own desire. Is that really what you want to do?

See, this is why I love Jim Newman. He's sort of an asshole who doesn't claim to know more than anyone else, or anything for that matter. I mean, as a woman, I LOVE men who are assholes, but I've never seen anything quite like it before, it's such an enchanting paradox.

Write down all the things you want out of life, big and small. Write down a list of self-care exciting things you can take time to do, small things, listening to a favorite song you haven't heard in years, reading an old favorite comic, etc. Make time to do 2 or 3 each day. The bigger stuff starts to connect and unfold and you'll find you have a huge lust for life again. Helps to start with the small stuff. How is your diet? Too many carbs possibly?

I'm starting to feel really overwhelmed again, my life is full, rich, full of love and wonderful things, but oh my god, when I need to a break or to just be, it's like everything crashes around me. Honestly super jealous of the "me" time I project that others have on this forum. I remember during the awakening how it was like I totally checked out and oh my God, the mess and chaos sometimes and yet... somehow by the grace of God nothing really bad happened out of that. Maybe I can check out and still do the dishes and get the kids to school on time? I dunno. This book is really helpful with these thoughts and feelings right now. https://www.amazon.com/Rainbow-Way-Cultivating-Creativity-Motherhood/dp/1782790284/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=the+rainbow+waY&qid=1600212929&sr=8-1 I also feel like I need to do some desire identification, clarification in this area but tonight I feel too scattered. Here's Muninn almost all grown up. I got a new office chair and now I hardly get to sit in it because he likes it better. Vizslas are super cat like. They are like dog + cat, squared.