meta_male

From dom phantasies to submission after a couple roasts, that's range brother.

@Clarence This was absolutely fascinating to read. Some of what you said kinda challenged the way I usually think about identity, in a good way. Respect man.

This actually sounds like a very grounded and healthy mindset you have. Just living a good, steady life is way underrated anyway. All the best with everything ahead, hope the move goes well!

@Av2521 I’d say for dating, you don’t need to become some pickup artist or anything like that. Just start getting used to talking to women in everyday situations, shops, cafés, events or whatever. Not to get numbers or anything, just to get comfortable with real life interactions. If that kind of thing works here in Switzerland, I’m sure it works in Germany too. And even though you’re not chasing some life purpose anymore, having something you enjoy doing, like a hobby or project you can dive into, makes a lot of other things easier. You meet people more naturally that way and it gives your days a bit more momentum too. So I wouldn't completely close the door on the passion thing, although I can understand you've made it this far without one which is completely valid.

@Princess Arabia Probably ended up in another country. This bro never heard of planes.

Happens to the best. In the beginning it's all too much, traffic, rules, buttons, speed, vehicle operation etc. Relax and keep driving 👍

@Raze Correct.

I don’t keep track of the percentage. It should be equal more or less and feel like we’re both investing without keeping count. An example of too much on her part: she cancels plans with her friends or family just to meet up with me. It feels good in the moment, but honestly it doesn’t sit right. Turns out that kind of dynamic never feels balanced.

One tip that helps is to look where you want to go. Your body will kind of 'connect' with the car and naturally help with steering. In curves, looking at the lane lines helps too (avoid looking at the one between you and oncoming traffic when going right). If you wanna become a good driver try to actually enjoy driving, you can fake this with smiling – works wonders.

@hyruga Your argument really overlooks how fragile childhood is. Kids don't have the coping mechanisms adults do, they don't have the language to express what's happening to them. You're basically saying that adults are the ones to experience real trauma, not kids. It's not about how big or visible an event is, it's about how overwhelming it feels to the person experiencing it. Do only adults lose a family member? Are there no kids in war zones? Only adults experience abuse? You can imagine how much bigger an impact such events have on children. The mind is good at hiding it from them and all efforts to heal trauma are in vain if not looked at the root of where those immense emotions formed. Whether an event is forgotten or not doesn't matter. Trauma is stored in the body, it's not just a memory.

@Emerald You made a lot of great points here. Personally, I’ve noticed that when a woman invests too much in me right off the bat, it actually makes me lose attraction. I end up assuming she’s not thinking clearly, because there's no way to truly know someone that well so early on. Genuine connection takes time. Honestly, I’m tired of running into women who want to lock things down immediately just because their emotions spike. It feels like they’re chasing the idea of a relationship more than actually getting to know me. And that's when it turns into something casual.

@Caoimhin I did give it enough shots. I prayed, I surrendered, I studied and I was open. But what I found didn’t lead me back to Christianity, it led me into something less defined but more alive. The idea that truth can only be found in one tradition is too narrow for me. I get that certainty brings comfort, but for me what works best is to man up and face the unknown. Btw, you remind me of Athelstan from Vikings

Yamaha T700. This is my version of the perfect product. It's basically a bicycle with an engine. It's more on the pricey side. But this bike isn’t just a toy, it’s a tool for life. Here’s what it brings to the table: You're introverted? Put on your gear, tune out the world, and ride out like a post-apocalyptic monk. You don’t ride it to be seen, you ride it to disappear. You're in an outgoing mood? Even better. You’ve got a worldwide community, pretty much anywhere you pull up. Want to attract girls? Show up to a date on this thing, drop your gear and let her see you at your worst and smelliest. This is raw “this is me” energy. Learn to deal with the remaining 99% of people you will attract, which are old men. Depressed? You won’t be after a session with this machine. It rips you out of your head and throws you into the now. The moment you turn the key, your brain isn’t in charge anymore. The ride demands real presence and laser-sharp focus. Don’t feel like going to the gym? Hop on and handle this 200kg bike. You gotta earn your right to go somewhere. Looking for raw truth and clarity? This bike puts reality in your face. Make a mistake and you won’t doubt it – you’ll feel it. Craving adventure? Throw in a tent and sleeping bag. This thing doesn't just to take you from A to B – it gives you stories. Not everything perfect comes in small boxes. This product will demand you at your best, and pull you out of your worst. Good bang for buck, can recommend 👍

@Emotionalmosquito I get you, I’ve been there myself. This felt more like a dam breaking than just a moment of bad judgment. But if you want to be taken seriously, the way you deliver the message matters most. You've probably used enough words over the years and by how you describe them they’ll focus more on the outburst than your pain behind it. There are better ways to get your message across though...they might not hit hard in the moment, but have a long lasting impact.

@Emotionalmosquito So you're calling out the double standard but then use some seriously inappropriate language in front of your niece? Come on man, you need to lead by example, not mirror toxic behavior. It sounds like you're stuck in this family dynamic, and honestly no real point was made with that outburst.

Or maybe you don't have to look at all and sit back and relax. The soul level connection is a hoax..

I see, that's a valuable realisation, mate. You sound a lot like one of my friends. I could never fathom how he can stay in a relationship for pragmatic reasons while remaining conscious of the motive behind it. That sounds absolutely foreign to me. I think for some personalities it’s manageable. But for me, it always came at the cost of personal growth and once I noticed that I couldn’t unsee it.

I trained this some years ago but then it freaked me out when it worked. And somehow my mind always went "You hate spiders? Here, let me show you one in dinosaur size, I'll put it next to the faceless demon down the corridor :)"

If I get that old, then help me God. How many people are in relationships for psychological comfort, even when they’re not sick per se? I’ve yet to find someone who isn’t. And I’ve yet to find a woman who’s faced the challenge of being content on her own. At this point in life, I couldn’t feel comfort in seeking support from a relationship, knowing they're mostly an unconscious act. The last time I was sick, my girlfriend made me feel even more sick, so much that I had to break up. Women aren’t naturally empathetic, they’re just really good actresses. I’m saying you gotta be a little mad to fully indulge in relationships...not saying it’s not okay to be

Technically, one has to be a bit of a madman to be in a relationship in the first place.

Good luck with trying to evolve without passion

@Lyubov I can definitely relate. My parents got into a cult and I grew up in that environment. Everything was about control, fear, and following ‘the right way.’ Having conversations with them now is exhausting because they’re so stuck in their beliefs they're unable to see any other perspective. The ironic part: They didn’t want my sister and me to grow up in a toxic environment like they did – yet, in trying to protect us from the world, they built us a custom made straitjacket from hell. The other day, my mom even claimed she was the best mother in all of Switzerland because ‘we were the only children raised in the truth.’ Funny enough, our therapist doesn't agree.

@Caoimhin I prayed to God to guide me to truth when I was a Christian. I asked for clarity, for understanding, and for a deeper connection. I believed that the God I had worshiped would hear my prayer. The answer I received didn’t come from the Christian God. It came from something beyond those boundaries, a deeper sense of truth that transcended the labels I had placed on it. There is no fear in love.

After severe episodes of panic attacks I am now suicidal, last weekend I went to the forest with my gun, but couldn't pull through. The past decade have been a big struggle, only to barely stay alive. There's no hope of life ever getting better. I have no family to turn to. I need help but don't know how to get it, I feel paralyzed but can barely acces my brain.