meta_male

Fair enough you've got it, better times will come.

@Sugarcoat There is no ego really, just like there's no soul. What you’re experiencing could be more about being trapped in your head, letting thoughts and concepts disconnect you from your body. The mind can make everything seem way more complicated than it is. Interacting with physical reality more (even short walks to the forest) could be worth a shot and help you feel more grounded

@Sugarcoat So it's more as if you’re not using up any space? One very underrated way to gain some momentum that can help ground you is exercise. Even if it feels like it’s not going to make a big difference and the problem might be metaphysical, just moving and feeling your body can shift things a little over time.

I felt like this during what I could only describe as the dark night of the soul. It was a time when everything felt numb and disconnected, almost like I was watching my own life from a distance. I didn’t feel much of anything, no joy, no drive, and no connection to anything around me. Like you, I didn’t have the desire to engage with the things I used to love or even take care of myself in the way I should.

@Majed I'd say becoming suicidal is your clue to take a step back from trying to meet society’s standards and focusing on building a life you actually enjoy. Ironically, when you stop obsessing over sex and validation and focus on growing at your own pace, things start to feel less hopeless and that's when you start attracting effortlessly. Don’t let outside pressure rush your process.

Sounds like it yes. It's confusing because we tend to overthink and are introspective in nature, so things will rarely make sense in the moment. It's less that something's off with you, people are just not matching that depth and are repelled by it because they're mostly shallow (compared to an INFP's inner world).

Edit: corrupt link

It's not strange, you probably intuit that it does do some harm, even if you can't see how at the moment. How long have you been using it for?

Yes, I can relate and for me it was only clear in hindsight. What is your MBTI personality type?

@patricknotstar Did you listen to Curt's interview with Leo? Part 1. Somewhere around the 5 hour mark I think he explains it a little different than in his solipsism video.

I am also INFP and always loved his raw, no bullshit style. I find it very grounding.

I hear you. What you need to work on is emotional and social intelligence. It's not about being less deep...but about being deep and also understood. It's the art of translating your inner world and communicating it in a way others can actually connect with. Don't think of it as wearing a mask but more like building a bridge.

Only one way to find out.

@trenton This will destroy your algorithm on a dating platform.

🤣

@Schizophonia I used to follow advice like that: pushing, counting dates, trying to stick to rules. I blocked girls who were genuinely interested but just taking their time. It just created pressure and shallow connections. Things changed when I dropped the rules and actually relaxed into the moment. Actual experience is the best teacher. @integration journey Yeah I get it, I used to overthink a lot too. That's what being in your head is like

Understood, thanks.

Alright. Out of curiosity though, do you really need a tool to spot a user who keeps vomiting up their groping fantasies from different profiles?

I think you’re looking at it from a strategic angle, I'd say that’s what’s tripping you up. Seduction isn’t really about steps or escalation. It’s not about what you do but more about the energy you’re in. If you’re focused on avoiding the friendzone your chances of ending up there will ironically be high. But when you're relaxed, present and not attached to outcome everything shifts. Easier said than done because all you want is to get laid. It varies depending on the girl, between 2 – 7 dates in my experience. But don't stress too much about the timeline and focus on getting out of your head and building connection. The rest will follow.

Good luck defending your world view, the truth doesn't care how unfair you think it is. Life has a way of waking people up sooner or later. You will see.

This is a pretty bizarre (and familiar) post...

@SQAAD I get why you're frustrated but honestly, this is the victim mindset talking. If you stay in it, it will just keep dragging you down more = no women for you. You gotta find a way to move past it, man. Your post shows you have poor boundaries: despite noticing her low interest you still decided to meet her, that's on you. If this woman isn't excited about you then there's nothing you can do to force it, and it says nothing about women as a whole. What good reasons? How is blaming women helping you? Is it getting you respect? Some things to think about...

@Never_give_up Hey man, I can relate to what you're saying. I grew up in a Christian environment and was pretty soft and feminine in my traits too. I wasn't taught anything about masculinity. Going to the army was frowned upon, so I did civil service in childcare instead. Leadership, courage, resilience felt absolutely foreign to me. What helped me massively was getting into physical, adventurous, and challenging activities. Downhill biking, motorcycle racing, off-roading, lifting weights, sleeping outdoors, shooting at the range. All of that built me up mentally, physically and emotionally. You don't need to be a totally different person overnight. Start by pushing your limits physically (e.g. taking cold showers). Find activities that make you feel alive and test you. Don't shy away from discomfort, welcome it, "embrace the suck". Masculinity isn't about being a macho leader, more about being capable, trusting yourself, and handling challenges with courage.

You can always tell her this is where you stand and see what she says. But if you're bored already then you kinda have your answer.

Because too many users here use the forum as a way to socialise and vent instead of a tool for growth.