Breakingthewall

@James123 thanks for the conversation

I think there is a confusion with this of the memories. you are creating a duality between memory-ego and nothing. The point is that if you do 5meo you will clearly see that at this moment you are nothing ... but when it finish you will see that you are also something, a thought, an illusion, anything, doesn't matter. So what you are right now is nothing, agree ... but the nothingness is right now something. It has no relation to the monkey mind you said before. with your mind in perfect silence you are still something, a plant have no mind and is something. this is the point for me, to understand how nothing is something and something is nothing

Remembers are thoughts and are the ego, so it impossible that you remember anything before the ego. The question is, what is you without ego? It's the awakening I think Let's see, for now I have to agree, I had realizations but not a true awakening. When I realized the nothingness, was only nothingness, but many people had very different experience. I think 5 meo could be the tool, but not smoked like I use, too short

If your mind stops, nothingness manifests. it's pretty obvious right? With your mental "movement" you are creating this reality, space, time (or re-creating, it doesn't means that there only exist in your mind, but for you it is). So when your mind stops you perceive that all space-time reality is an illusion. nothing magical for now, simple mechanics. the question is how that nothing has the potential to produce that thought. You say that it is not the nothingness, is me ... ah yes, but it happens that I am nothing, as I came from the nothingnes, then? As leo is not around here, I am going to say what he would say: kill yourself with 30 mg of 5meo in your nose or in your ass . For me it's a good advice, maybe for you too

This is the point. You (and me) can't perceive how the nothingness create a thought. The nothingness is doing something. Not something, everything. Only thoughts , illusions, but exist. I can't understand how this duality exist, I saw the nothing and the illusion many times ( there is not I, etc, yes I know but still you perceived). Anyone who went deeper is going to say that there is not duality, nothing=everything, but I can't understand. So more visits to the nothing, more time, more deep, are needed.

I think there is truth in what you say. If I do 5meo in a more or less high dose, I come to nothingness and it seems to me that I am on the ground of reality, but although it seems that there is no me there, there is a rejection of nothing. horror. even so when I return I perceive that in that nothing is the key, but I don't see where or how. I cannot accept it, it is absence, zero, death. I have to go back to that nothing until I can be that, it's something really scary

??

@BakeJeyner Maybe what works for me will work for you when the cosmos seems scary, strange, empty, horrible, after a psychedelic experience. Observe yourself, your being, your mind. don't think, observe. what you now remember of your visit to the "other side" is a distorted memory. what you observe is the expression of reality. don't analyze it, just be. This is closer to reality than your memories of the psychedelic trip

I think I understand what you want to expressing, but why you use the name or adjective nothingness? It's not adaquate. Nothingness is a zero, being is something. Not material , or visible, but different than nothing

What other thing could you trust?

@James123 im seeing a thought that you wrote right now. Where is the difference if I can see the monkey mind of not? Did you realize the void itsnt it? So ask yourself, how could I think about the void? The void is the absence of anything. The absolute zero. Even if I am an illusion, how is possible that it's an illusion?

@James123 yes papaji said that, nothing, zero, absence of anything. But observe yourself. Are you nothing? Even the smallest thought is not nothingness. You didn't remember nothing before your birth because there are not remembers before. There was no time so nothing happens, no space so no shape. Seems like nothing. But the nothing is, if not , how a thought is being creating?

Are you sure? Maybe you are stuck in that nothingness that you perceived with those 10 grs of mushroom. I had similar experience a couple of times but I think there is another step to do. When you come back to the illusion and the ego, how it is possible? Your explanation is that all is illusion, so it nothing, itsnt it? But it isn't, nothingness is nothingness, void, zero. No illusion, ego, nothing

the ego is a kind of phantom made up of thoughts that form a multicolored avatar but without substance, a kind of hologram. encompasses the entire structure of who you are as a human, even the briefest and smallest of your thoughts. that is why it is very difficult to get rid of it. It is the crutch on which you lean in this world, without it you would be lost, you would merge with the whole and stop being the part. when the ego disappears, in death, it will be as if it never existed. the hologram will dissolve ... pof! and bye. I think that what is possible is to reduce the ego to the minimum necessary, as the text of suyinamurti says, transform the ego to an ego that "knows" deeply that it is an illusion, capable of being in silence, and letting the greatest flow pass of possible emptiness, and enjoy this world of colors, I guess that's why exist.

Those two kids are god. It's not like God is his boss and is allowing it, it's like he is living this experience. This is the human experience. Give them love and respect and glorify them like all humans who enjoy and suffer the human life

I had a similar experience, there was only me and there was no time, no escape for all eternity, immobile. very real and horrible. After some weeks I returned to that place of eternal no time and I realized that yes, that is so, but I loved myself with an enormous love, and it was wonderful. but the truth is that I felt relief returning to the world of dreams and colors. I think you have had your first visit to eternity and it is something so ... strange, eternal, that you cannot process it, that's why you feel so bad. once you integrate it and assume it (it may require time and mental openness), if you go back there you will pick up on other nuances

Well really the work we do is go beyond the concept, right? that that God is love, etc, is interesting as a curiosity, but reality is only direct experience, whoever has not grasped that essential idea has not understood anything. At one point, I think it is better not to watch videos, or read or anything, just observe, 24 hours a day. but before that if it can be motivating to describe the landscape

I have used the word vertigo because the sensation is similar to floating at a high altitude, and yes, you perceive that there is freedom but the lack of reference, of an anchor, is unpleasant, it is necessary to use a grip to feel safe . Even though you know that grip is fake .Something similar to what you say happens to me, if the meditation is truly empty, it could be unconfortable if it's too long, I have to stop, pick up the phone for a moment, think, etc. The addiction to the concept is strong

The problem with awakenings is that once they finish the mind start an unstoppable process of interpretation . you know that interpretation is a kind of empty copy of something alive, but you cannot stop it, the mind is too used to dominating, being without mind produces vertigo, lack of restraint. At least, each time relaxes his pressure a few grams. You have to convince it little by little (I speak hypothetically, my mind is not silent, although I am increasingly able to ignore it). the reality is that you are fully aware that the mental process, the concepts and the ideas are false by definition, so I consider the evolution towards silence very likely. I still feel vertigo completely abandoning the concept, living in the void

@RedLine imagine that you are an infinite consciousness that creates itself in a compulsive way, and that evolves in complexity without limits, that elaborates an increasingly sophisticated dream in real time, of unimaginable complexity. She does not mind suffering because she is made of love, if she has to go through millions of autchwitzs, billions of 18th century asylums, trillions of torture rooms for pregnant women, she will do it because she is made of love and she wants more more moreeee!! The crazy dance of the dream of god, where the pure light of love springs from terrible human pain

Tyson wants to fight for real, to make a world championship at 56 years old, to break the limits of the supposedly Impossible. he was a gifted boxer, but a bully, never a warrior. when the adversary was at his level, he had a bad time. He did not enjoy the war as a holyfield, so he still has the thorn of boxing stuck. I think he will surprise everyone

@Blackhawk good 5 cents. the ikea story was funny, the guy has no problem laughing at himself, but maybe he doesn't like being made fun of by the gang boss. It is in his right, right? with an apology it is fixed. And that of being a man ... for saying that to someone's face you could have a bad problem, don't say it from afar!

Yes, it has to die, it is a stupid and deluded ego that we build in this society, it inevitably leads to suffering and neurosis, keeping it until old age as almost everyone does is a guarantee of madness

dogs suffer when they suffer and when they don't, they don't. it's the good thing about having no ego mind. I had been very present for a few days, and I think that today ... I missed my ego! Too much simplicity and peace ... I suppose that would have led me to do something that I forbid myself: reading fiction, and fiction of massacres, etc. so I'm "enjoying" my dear ego again, inventing, asking, complaining and do the things that the egos do

Sure, all the dogs in the world are happy, but it's difficult for humans. If you love someone, your partner, your children if you have them, you know that this life can get very ugly. I was reading before about the wars between Protestants and Catholics. crucifixions of babies at the doors of houses, things like that ... the dark side of life, suffering. how to embrace that? I know that all this is ego, that they are images in the mind nothing more. but I don't want to bring anyone into this cruel world of fragility, we, as God, are too jokers. we make up jokes like war and leprosy for children. What a speech more .... not illuminated, I know. The good thing is that I can center myself in the present moment and forget all those histories, but what about your sons if you have? Difficult