Breakingthewall

@James123 yes, let go the self. It's a total surrender to merge with that infinite nothing. Really scary, I can't imagine how it's possible without 5 meo. Even with it it seems really difficult to me, it's the most intense thing that I ever experienced, and it's not nice at all

He said that the people above 84 is not going to reincarnate... maybe he is enlightened, but he says a lot of bulshits

Source?

Yes , exactly. Maybe next time. The pure empty seems to me death, the point is that shouldn't be a "me", and even with a quite big dose the horror is still there. But embody the infinite? There is no one to embody , only infinite and death without return (seems like) Yes, I'm masochist and now I feel very good. Maybe because I'm not dead for now. And positive too because I think it's one step more to the real dissolution. For me seems very difficult

No one left to talk, was infinite , but still no total death. Maybe wasn't the moment. Serious thing

Where are the balls to dead? Let's see if I find them, maybe they are lost

the transcendence of the "i". placing oneself in the perpetual present beyond the mind that creates time

I was in the void recently, there was no one there, there was no reference, no god, no beauty or ugliness, it was an empty hole, the absence of something, terrifying when I appeared. I want to go there without psychedelics, because his purity is complete, I feel a huge atraction. the problem is that I and nothing cant live together. I'm trying to educate myself to agree to come to nothing , but no ... no one can come in, I have to wait outside. difficult, but it supposed is possible

Yes, getting used to emptiness is not an easy task, ego and emptiness are like two powerful magnets that repel each other. a point about illusion: for the human, everything is illusion, the world is a creation of your mind. maya is an empty hologram without substance. fine, but that doesn't mean it doesn't really exist! the point is that the multicolored mental image that forms in your mind from ... something, is that, a mental image. it doesn't really exist. That does not mean that when you look at a tree, the tree does not exist. the tree is, you are. your body is real. you want to call it "just a thought", "illusion" ok, if it makes you happier to give it that name, wonderful. What does it matter if it exists or not? for you it is a creation of the mind, that is evident Totally agree

That is. When I go to the void (artificially) it's nothingness because my ego hates so much the void that even with psychedelic it's a big reject, but I'm in the process of understanding and costume. It's pure logic that if you are in the nothingness, there is a conciousness perciving, if not, how do you know there is a void without illusion?

Great report, I enjoyed a lot the reading

@James123 thanks for the conversation

I think there is a confusion with this of the memories. you are creating a duality between memory-ego and nothing. The point is that if you do 5meo you will clearly see that at this moment you are nothing ... but when it finish you will see that you are also something, a thought, an illusion, anything, doesn't matter. So what you are right now is nothing, agree ... but the nothingness is right now something. It has no relation to the monkey mind you said before. with your mind in perfect silence you are still something, a plant have no mind and is something. this is the point for me, to understand how nothing is something and something is nothing

Remembers are thoughts and are the ego, so it impossible that you remember anything before the ego. The question is, what is you without ego? It's the awakening I think Let's see, for now I have to agree, I had realizations but not a true awakening. When I realized the nothingness, was only nothingness, but many people had very different experience. I think 5 meo could be the tool, but not smoked like I use, too short

If your mind stops, nothingness manifests. it's pretty obvious right? With your mental "movement" you are creating this reality, space, time (or re-creating, it doesn't means that there only exist in your mind, but for you it is). So when your mind stops you perceive that all space-time reality is an illusion. nothing magical for now, simple mechanics. the question is how that nothing has the potential to produce that thought. You say that it is not the nothingness, is me ... ah yes, but it happens that I am nothing, as I came from the nothingnes, then? As leo is not around here, I am going to say what he would say: kill yourself with 30 mg of 5meo in your nose or in your ass . For me it's a good advice, maybe for you too

This is the point. You (and me) can't perceive how the nothingness create a thought. The nothingness is doing something. Not something, everything. Only thoughts , illusions, but exist. I can't understand how this duality exist, I saw the nothing and the illusion many times ( there is not I, etc, yes I know but still you perceived). Anyone who went deeper is going to say that there is not duality, nothing=everything, but I can't understand. So more visits to the nothing, more time, more deep, are needed.

I think there is truth in what you say. If I do 5meo in a more or less high dose, I come to nothingness and it seems to me that I am on the ground of reality, but although it seems that there is no me there, there is a rejection of nothing. horror. even so when I return I perceive that in that nothing is the key, but I don't see where or how. I cannot accept it, it is absence, zero, death. I have to go back to that nothing until I can be that, it's something really scary

??

@BakeJeyner Maybe what works for me will work for you when the cosmos seems scary, strange, empty, horrible, after a psychedelic experience. Observe yourself, your being, your mind. don't think, observe. what you now remember of your visit to the "other side" is a distorted memory. what you observe is the expression of reality. don't analyze it, just be. This is closer to reality than your memories of the psychedelic trip

I think I understand what you want to expressing, but why you use the name or adjective nothingness? It's not adaquate. Nothingness is a zero, being is something. Not material , or visible, but different than nothing

What other thing could you trust?

@James123 im seeing a thought that you wrote right now. Where is the difference if I can see the monkey mind of not? Did you realize the void itsnt it? So ask yourself, how could I think about the void? The void is the absence of anything. The absolute zero. Even if I am an illusion, how is possible that it's an illusion?

@James123 yes papaji said that, nothing, zero, absence of anything. But observe yourself. Are you nothing? Even the smallest thought is not nothingness. You didn't remember nothing before your birth because there are not remembers before. There was no time so nothing happens, no space so no shape. Seems like nothing. But the nothing is, if not , how a thought is being creating?

Are you sure? Maybe you are stuck in that nothingness that you perceived with those 10 grs of mushroom. I had similar experience a couple of times but I think there is another step to do. When you come back to the illusion and the ego, how it is possible? Your explanation is that all is illusion, so it nothing, itsnt it? But it isn't, nothingness is nothingness, void, zero. No illusion, ego, nothing

the ego is a kind of phantom made up of thoughts that form a multicolored avatar but without substance, a kind of hologram. encompasses the entire structure of who you are as a human, even the briefest and smallest of your thoughts. that is why it is very difficult to get rid of it. It is the crutch on which you lean in this world, without it you would be lost, you would merge with the whole and stop being the part. when the ego disappears, in death, it will be as if it never existed. the hologram will dissolve ... pof! and bye. I think that what is possible is to reduce the ego to the minimum necessary, as the text of suyinamurti says, transform the ego to an ego that "knows" deeply that it is an illusion, capable of being in silence, and letting the greatest flow pass of possible emptiness, and enjoy this world of colors, I guess that's why exist.