Breakingthewall

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Everything posted by Breakingthewall

  1. If my experience is of any use to you, for me nothingness, infinity, call it whatever you want, it was absolute horror, death, and now it seems to me the most wonderful. the difference is in me, not in the infinity obviously, and that difference has been produced in about 4 months thanks to this substance. it's an amazing catalyst.
  2. Or maybe you start again. The dance of karma
  3. I had a similar experience in some respects. I only existed, without time or space, nothing happened. eternal and with no possibility of escape. There could be nothing worse and that's why I had to forget it. take several days is to forget that. just as you came to the conclusion that the problem was my ego, which rejected that loneliness. but I thought about that later. at the time of the experience there was no thought, only the awareness of eternal loneliness. But must be the ego, because, if nothing happens, how the desperation happened? It's an ego death, but not totally
  4. It is very common that marijuana feels very good to you and then very bad. I was several years smoking almost every day and it made me very happy, in the field with my friends, laughs, openness. for sex too, aphrodisiac. Without realizing it it became something dark, weird, paranoid. Now I have an intolerance to marijuana, a few months ago I accidentally ate a marijuana chocolate ... quite a challenge, a crazy night, when a few years ago it was very relaxing. I quit many years ago and it's the same. I think it's for ever
  5. In the game of karma, suffering is the engine. the evolution of life meant that to survive a living being had to kill another, and from there we live in this dance. We humans don't literally devour each other but we use each other ruthlessly. most humans are deeply unhappy even though they don't even know it, trapped in their unconsciousness. all beings are one who has a perfect plan, who is creating a constantly evolving tapestry. the suffering or happiness of one of its infinite manifestations is simply irrelevant as they do not exist as individual beings. it has the same importance as the fly larvae that do not survive. Happiness begins with the acceptance that you are not here to be perfectly happy but to do your part. the logical mind can analyze what it wants but it is limited. Your part could be impossible to understand . but Why? Because it's needed for the Evolution of karma. it's not you against god. you are god, the complete kosmos, dancing the dance of karma. if your mission is unpleasant ... that's how missions are, this is not an amusement park! once this is accepted, happiness is possible
  6. One question that I cannot avoid about the essence of reality is: why? we live as separate individuals this being an illusion. there is a curtain that hides our true nature from us and creates the illusion of time, that something is happening. This something that happens is not pure delight, it is deliberate, it points to something, and it does not save on suffering, it does what is necessary. once the curtain fades you see that reason is not a valid tool, you have to discard it. but from this side of the wall, reason sees with complete clarity that all this dance has a goal, it is the work of an engineer who seeks ... what? I know it's a nonsense question, as I'm in the crazy dance, I have to dance, try to untie the knots, fulfill my mission as well as I can as an obedient little soldier. anything else is madness. But must be a reason for that. Evolution probably
  7. because it completely vanishes the illusion of being an individual in which we live. what is achieved with years of meditation, renunciation, etc.,(if it occurred) happens in five minutes by force, it is normal that it can be terrifying
  8. Beautiful, inspires calm, love ,and bit of risk She?? Deci has the same feminine energy that conan the barbarian
  9. Agree. The problem is that even knowing it, the ego creates its limits and its shits and even if you know that it is not real, it does not stop shouting its judgments at you and making your life bitter. A psychedelic would be fine to anesthetize him for a week for example, but he doesn't exist. I begin to see clearly that you have to be disciplined, have a life, customs, companies, activities, a job ... in short, an external context, which does not force the ego. it is a path of double effort to understand it and dissect it to be able to separate it, when later there are customs that feed it
  10. Empty conciousness is not nothingness. Nothing is no existence, no conciousness. So the nothing don't exist, because always it's an empty conciousness, a potentiality
  11. The only conclusion for me is that infinite nothingness does not exist. The infinite nothing that is experienced isnt really nothing, it is something, consciousness, whatever, because if it were nothing, it could not be experienced. nothing is non-existence, no experience
  12. I was not there, only at the end of the experience. I'm talking about breakups with 5 meo. My mind is in the process of refinement (using your words), still tied to a great extent to the "karmic" but having seen the absolute necessity to free itself from all bondage. A year ago i wouldn't have known what I'm talking about. Now I'm working 24/7 in that. 5 meo is my teacher, beyond any writing, so instead of showing me only wonderful landscapes, he teaches me what I feared and did not even know that I was afraid. I take the opportunity to link to another of yours, very inspiring, in case someone wants to take a look at it
  13. In my limited experience I have seen the infinity, without limits, and because it was infinite it was nothing, since any "something", in comparison, became a zero, flat, without shape . I would like to know more, but the terror of annihilation leaves no space I talked about a point without dimension because I realized myself as a point in the no space that wasn't happening, stuck in the no time, eternal because it isn't any movement. But who knows if it was point. Much more dentegration of the veil are required
  14. @Leo Nordin your dilemma is simple: stop circling, looking for examples, well-trodden paths. Everything is much simpler: listen to your inner guide, if you let it speak you will see that it is irresistible. listen to advice? doubt what is correct or not? that is not the way. the path is unique, singular, sacred. don't corrupt it with doubts, just listen to yourself, and always do that you have to do. Impossible to get wrong
  15. your mind is sharp as a blade. it is true that you delight in listening to yourself. But the music that your instrument composes is in tune. A pleasure to listen
  16. the problem with the unlimited is that there can be nothing beyond it. but all the infinite kosmos is at the same time a point without dimension. from the absolute arises the relative, so the nothingness generates something. from here the reason seems useless. but it is a fact that the human mind has the rare ability to understand the universe.
  17. The eternal crazy dance. How is possible that exist? How is possible that is all that exist? Well, who knows the ultimate nature of the reality
  18. I don't think that the brain contains anything, rather it restricts. creates a barrier to limit perception to form. ever with psychedelics have you had the vision or the memory of yourself with less than 2 years of age? to be with hardly any form, pure being. From there, the mind defines and limits reality, until we get to the point of beginning to de-define and de-limit to regain access to that essence but with a developed mind. It is difficult because the two things do not coexist comfortably
  19. The thing is that 5 meo is not like a trip, it's a magic pill that dissolves the illusion. it doesn't take you anywhere, it shows you what is really there now. for me the horror of emptiness has been necessary because I was very attached (or am) to illusion. there is neither empty nor full, there is only kosmos. It is not something that can be digested in a moment, unless you are very prepared, years of meditation, etc. for someone who has not even imagined the possibility of nothingness, infinity, it can be horror, but that is because you have to become more flexible to be able to erase the veil
  20. the illusion ends and you continue to be the cosmos
  21. I would say that the i that you are dissolves and the being that you really are continues to be, as always. Since it is the entire universe, that your i disappears is irrelevant, but could be that that i is somehow reborn, or restarts with part of its identity, to continue evolving in some way
  22. Im not sure if I understand what is shining light on the identity. I meant to stop to be you...to indentified all the thoughts that are forming your "I" , that basically are all your thoughts, and de-identify with them. take a step back and see them for what they are, an illusory construction, and go to the real, the here and now where the immutable being that you really are is. Everything that is not that is to go around in a circle even if it seems to you that you are moving forward. you think you have your ego almost fixed, and you are exactly the same as at the beginning. It is not a matter of improving, it is getting off the wheel. I think that for that the ego has to be really tired of itself, that's why I said that having a shitty ego is lucky
  23. @Loving Radiance you ego is a mess. Normal, it's an ego. Trascend the ego is the only way. Fix the ego is working for nothing. If your ego is a shit, welcome. More reason to trascend it. Tell to you ego, your remembers, your mess: bye, as soon as you can
  24. look at the cosmic orchestra where each piece fulfills its role, where each molecule is in its place, where the perfect synchrony exceeds the imaginable. kneel humbly if you grasp even a tiny part of its magnitude. but never try to cover it with your human mind, it's impossible
  25. @VeganAwake well, ajata says: absolute infinity is nothing. something cannot come out of pure nothing. therefore something is really nothing. Okay... really nothingness is infinite and any finite "something" in infinite nothingness is 0 by contrast or division, but ... observe a bird closely, without thinking, just observe it in the precise present moment. you will see yourself. the pure being that exists, right here, right now, out of the time. Is it "nothing"?