Megan Alecia

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Everything posted by Megan Alecia

  1. Examples: -Stage Orange -Stage Green (Lynch at Turquoise??) -Stage Yellow ??? Bipolar or turquoise? Both?? -Stage Turquoise
  2. Life: Melbourne OR Stockholm For reasons (cultural) mentioned above I'm at stage yellow I aim for a meaningful life, successful healthy relationships, and holistic understanding.
  3. Nobody knows the answer unless it's guided by your experience. Your reality testing. Anything else has the potential to deceive you. So no, "spirituality" doesn't equate to some enlightened state. Most of it are allegories anyway, in pop culture it's fairly young so there's still a lot of confusion about the validity of such spiritual ideas (hence interest=due to its novelty factor), as opposed to something like political philosophy which has gone through so much change and progress through the ages.
  4. Just use ocean (big five). Sd is too generalistic for the mbti.
  5. Conmen gurus use this narrative to deceive the unquestioning masses.
  6. Well I guess one stage green downside is supporting garbage like tiktok.
  7. Visions: What I want: simple comfy life OR a real life high stakes journey. Idk. I love art and studying it. And the world at that. But studying isn't known to be a very risky challenging undertaking beyond the mental stuff. So what would give my life so kind of agency and feeling of intensity? God, I don't want any more personality disorders, whose chaos does make life much more challenging and sensitive. I want a passionate and healthy relationship. A boy kissing my belly and shoulders and cheeks and neck. Eating me out and fucking me good, taking pleasure in my body and pleasuring me too. Getting lost in each other's company. Me going down on him. Blah blah blah.
  8. Tiktok sucks. If I had that free time and privilege Id rather sit down reading a book.
  9. Woman: She was 18 months into hrt (reddit). I like the firm yet soft skin that I mentioned before. And titties. I get to be dirty cause this is my journal :D. As far as self care goes, I want nice smelling clothes and perfume. And a nice skincare routine. What would be found down there? A girldick... Not into srs. I don't find it necessary, also a risky thing to do.
  10. Dichotomies: Billie Eilish - ESFP, and like I wouldn't want to be blonde, and now she has it, and I'm an INTJ so it kinda has this dichotomy dynamic going on which is kinda funny. She looks alright with it though. Future house - Melbourne or Stockholm Both are located in horizontal-individualist cultures And affordable, unlike San Francisco, USA. I also am anticipating a future in natural scenery, walking in a calm and peaceful environments. And to my knowledge these two can provide that (probably need more research). The people strike me as okay, I don't really care all that much as I inherently like solitude. Vertical individualist - The Sopranos, people starting podcasts, rich kids and smartphones and Starbucks coffee, that kinda stuff (idk about networking, so) Vertical collectivist - Conformity, consensual, conflict-averse, Asian parenting, law and order, social conservatism
  11. @Raptorsin7 someone who's attractive, passionate, intimate and would cherish my existence in his life.
  12. Only once you accept that you'll never live perfectly.
  13. Had a dream today--two actually. One is about me creating a crack on a person's skull because I thought he was gonna hurt me in some way (which I forgot exactly in what way). Then it shifted to me stumbling at a party with my past schoolmates in it. One of them told me that the consequence would be me going to school only two or three times for the rest of the year, with two or three students. She also kinda volunteered and was like promising me how she and someone else would spend time with me the rest of the year. As the dream went on I kinda went with someone, kinda pulled them aside and said something about my future situation and felt like the girl with her didn't like me at all. Then I felt like massive shame all over my body. All the characters were female actually...
  14. Forget everything you've ever learned as the way "humans" should act or be, and start from there. Be aware of your own desires, impulses, fears, hopes, and dreams, at the same make the conscious decision to tackle life's problems head on. Along the way find friends, teachers, guidance, philosophers that truly speak to you. Be ready for the greatest journey of your life--the hero's journey.
  15. Everyone is on the front row seat of their own existence. That's why no one wants to be called stupid. Nothing worse like having a stupid person operate your entire life. I want to smell good and be clean. Maybe that's ocd but I actually mean it, of course reasonably so. Nothing wrong with our regular scents though. Idk what else to write. So yea. That's all for today I guess.
  16. I want to get fucked by a man. Like regular fucking. Also, being eaten out is like nice too, actually erotic once you're there. The problem with writing about sex is that you're not there. I wonder what being on estrogen is like. I've found that the skin gets firmer and smoother... which is amazing. I want those lovey dovey primal female emotions too. Yea, the way I write this thing makes it so against me atm. Tesla's right - "Not having solitude cripples the creative mind." Nothing like being intimate with your own thoughts. But yea. I want some intimate relationship. Body to body and mouth to mouth and mouth to other parts. Ugh.
  17. I suck at writing right now. Writers block is a real thing. The ideas in my head are all incoherent and don't make sense. Ive got really dirty thoughts but I'd rather not tell them here. I'm straight I think, but find girls beautiful too. But I don't want to f*ck them. Yea. That's clarified now, I think. On the other hand I'm sure I don't like this body I have right now. That's such an unappealing statement but it's the reality for transwomen. Or at least me.
  18. We singlehandedly give our lives meaning. It's the one thing we have control over, so feel free to decide which ones gonna be yours.