Gesundheit

Of course you'd have to want her in order to approach. If there's no desire, there's no approach. BUT, the difference between needy approach and non-needy approach is degree. A needy approach is stressful for the girl. It just turns her off, because it places a huge importance/pressure on her when in fact she wants to be treated fairly like a normal human being. You want to aim at a certain degree of desire, where you desire the girl enough to feel engaged, but not so much that you'd come off as desperate. Think of it this way; You have your life going; with a life purpose in place, a decent job, a good social circle, good residence, etc... You have all that, and you're looking for someone to share all of that with out of love and generosity, and desire for expansion and experience. So the girl should take like 10% of the overall picture, not 90%. That's the lesson most guys have to learn the hard way (I'm no exception). The girl doesn't want you to think of her as 90% of your life. Just 10% is okay, and then with time she earns more importance in your life because you're happy with her.

It's by far the hardest problem I have ever faced. College and graduation. How did I get here? I started school at 5 years old, one year ahead of other kids because my mother was a teacher. It's a legal benefit that parents can give to their children if they work for the government. And for the first 9 years, I was always the best or one of the best students in school, I wouldn't say effortlessly, but I did not struggle mentally, it was always within my mind capabilities. My mom always believed I'm a genius, not sure why. Then I got into high-school with a bunch of superior students who had also been at the top of their primary and secondary schools. They were extraordinarily intelligent, to the point where it was terrifying. I did not stand a chance. And thus, I started developing depression without me knowing. So, three years passed, and I graduated. At 2013, I started medical school (6 years in total here, although as far as I know, in Western countries it's just 4 years, but anyway), which means I should be graduated by now, but that's not what happened. I passed the first three years similar to school, challenging but no major problems. But then at the 4th year, with all the existential crises, internal struggles, depression, neuroses, OCDs, ADHD, night terror, dark night of the soul, heartbreak, war, poverty, work, and on top of all that trying to remain Muslim. It was hell, and I could not take it anymore. I broke down. I had to repeat the 4th year thrice, and the 5th year twice. So that's where I am today; repeating the 5th year after battling with reality for years. At least now there's no suffering and there's much more balance and clarity. I still am not in my optimal state yet. I am a lot better than this. But what can I do? I had exhausted my limits. I need to rest and heal. I need to treat myself gently. I need to nurture myself. I need to give myself what I have deprived it of before. I am getting better everyday, and sometimes I slide back, but in the big picture it's all moving upwards. Everything is curable. Stay strong, and never lose hope.

One month left for the exams. I should start preparing before it's too late. I have 6 materials left. 1 of them from the 4th year, and the remaining 5 from the current 5th year, like the following: Surgery (part 1); General/Abdomen. Surgery (part 4); Cosmetic/Osteo-traumatic/Paediatric. Ophthalmology. Rheumatology. Paediatrics (part 2). Forensic Medicine. I will come up with a plan/schedule and post it here.

Why don't people question reality enough? Because they're busy doing something else.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panentheism Interesting! Thanks for Joseph Maynor for talking about this concept.

Not to burst your bubble, but I just looked him up quickly and saw this:

@Keyhole It's actually a very good attitude to embody. While it does not necessarily magically heal everything, it can be very curative to break the logical limits that we'd imposed upon reality. Part of the problem of abuse is the thoughts about abuse. And so, transcending these thoughts can bring in more healing. It's actually a letting go and forgiveness of the abuser and the past that allows peace to manifest in the present.

@Vision Who the hell is Kevin?!

@Fadl But God healed me and removed my suffering. I owe that to the teachers who taught me about God. If it wasn't for them, I may have still been suffering till this day.

Acknowledging your desires and fulfilling them is not neediness. It's your right to want to meet her, that should be obvious to her, because otherwise you'll get friend-zoned. If she doesn't reciprocate then she's wasting your time because you're not looking for a friend, you are looking for a girlfriend. If you agreed to waste your time like that, that's what's actually needy.

Thinking is a function of the brain. I've experienced states of no mind which were very uncomfortable. There was a desire to form thoughts, but not the ability to do so. Just wanted to add this here as to support my point above.

Cut the shit and all the games. Tell her you want to meet her. If she agrees, great. If not, move on to someone else. Don't waste your time and effort on an unsure thing. And more importantly, don't invest in any way in something intangible, especially don't invest emotionally.

It can be true, but only as placebo. In other words, change happens mainly on the physical level. If you want to change physical reality, you have to play the physical game. However, the mind can be seen as a physical object as far as we're concerned here, scientifically. And so it affects the physical reality, just not to the same degree that physical objects do. After all, why would you be concerned about changing your physical reality? If LoA is true, then it should be its own point. You should not be concerned about the physical world anymore because it's all in your mind. And you should instead believe that you are living in a dream world where you can dream up anything. But no, the physical world is important to you, and so you're trying to utilize anything that comes your way to manipulate the physical world as physical world. LoA is one of these things.

Yes, they're both of the same nature. Thoughts and awareness are identical. But they're also qualitatively distinct. One way of viewing this duality is strange-loops. You become aware of thoughts, and you form thoughts about awareness, and then you become aware of those thoughts, and then you put that awareness into thoughts, and so on. This question assumes that thought and awareness are distinct. Within that assumption; No, we can't. We can only answer in thought form. But if think about it, some answers have the potential to change your awareness. So, again, in actuality, the duality collapses.

Absolutely, it is possible. Is it possible to maintain it for too long? I doubt it. Anyway, that's not necessarily related to happiness. I could think and be happy with my thoughts, and I could feel sadness without thoughts. The relationship between awareness and thought is what's important here. If there's friction, then there's resistance. If there's resistance, then there's unhappiness/suffering.

Because he's afraid of not-knowing.

A little commentary on the stupid MBTI system: I haven't studied the model in depth, but I think I have enough reasons to dismiss it as a whole. First of all, I've done about 5 tests over the last few years. 4 of them in the past two years, and 3 of them in the past couple of days. My results were shockingly different depending on the website where I took the test. Here, I'll be discussing my 4 latest results. The old 5th one I won't be talking about because I don't remember what it was. So, I did the first two tests on 16personalities.com with one year in between. I got ISFJ-T at first. I didn't care much, and I thought it was okay. But then a few days ago, I redid the test and got ISFP-A. I started wondering how it works and I posted this thread here and received fairly good answers; Now, before I did the other two tests, I watched a few of the suggested videos explaining the model. But I could not follow along with them at first, especially when it came to the cognitive functions. It seemed complex and out of my league (intellectually). Now I think I have a good idea of the functions, even though not a very deep one. I can see what the letters possibly point to and mean. But I can't really identify myself with any particular one. The reason I did the recent tests before studying in-depth was because I don't want to waste my time studying something that isn't true or practical, because truth and practicality are my top values. I always work my theory along with the practice. I can't learn a lot of theory without putting enough practice, cuz that would make me living in a fantasy. Likewise, I can't practice a lot without learning enough theory, cuz that would be kinda foolish and pointless. So the two go together in balance, although not symmetrical. Usually the perfect balance is about 80% practice and 20% theory. So back to the MBTI, I tried to identify myself with the little information I have. I failed severely, every single time; I tried that with tests where I was completely ignorant of the model, and with tests after I learned a little (it helps for understanding what the questions are about, but it could create biased answers), and eventually without tests most recently. I still can't identify myself as any particular type or with any particular traits. Even the introverted trait that seems to be predominant throughout all the tests and in my actual life, I can still envision scenarios where I could become extroverted, particularly if I was rich. To my point, the results I've got mostly were kinda balanced and symmetrical. I never got anything very much leaning to one side against the other, except for the introverted trait, which still is not that much. This makes me think that the whole system of evaluation is stupid and the way the questions are framed affects my answers. There's rarely been any questions where I was like: "Yes, this is exactly who I am". I'm always like: "What are you even asking about? I dunno, man. It depends. I could be this way or that way. etc...". And most of my answers I'm hesitant and unsure about. Because of this, everytime I do the test, I quickly lose focus and interest immediately after answering a few questions. And then the results come in, and they come almost in perfect balance. Most of the time, it's less than 60% against 40%. Only the introverted trait is nearly 70%. This reminds me of the democratic voting process. If 51% supports one side, they win. And so all Americans want Biden, even though, technically, nearly half of them don't. Do you see how stupid that is? It's like trying to have an answer for an unanswerable question. I can't take it seriously when 40% of me is a feeler but it gets dismissed for a 60% of sensing. And actually, I could easily explain that slight difference away by saying that the framing of the questions is the reason why, that becomes apparent by having different results from different test forms. Also, there is the factor of how I interpret the questions. I am sure that if I were to take the same tests right now, then I would get different results. I can't remember what I answered because I don't answer wholeheartedly, and everytime I read and interpret the questions differently. Sometimes I see things that I didn't see earlier, and some other times I forget to take certain things into account. That is why it's a highly contextual matter and no one answer could ever be the right answer. I think it's worth considering that every time I took the test, I was in a state of flow, i.e. no-self/ego-death. I don't mean that in a mystical sense, just in a way that does not make me have a sense of direction or purpose. So I set my agendas aside and let my inner self answer, and that usually happens automatically. I recently realized that I'm ego-less more often than not, thanks for truth being my top priority. I certainly have more to say, but I can't seem to find the thoughts. I'll add if I find something significant to add.

Complete BS. I have never gotten the same result twice. The way questions are framed plays a big role in choosing my answers. I don't identify with one particular way of interacting with the world. It's highly contextual. Can't rely on tests. I'm not sure I even have a personality type as I have changed so much over the years. Right now I think that personality is not different from ego. It's just a character that I choose to play. And I could play almost every character, well, except for the extroverted trait.

Dafuq

Good. Now that Pornhub is out of the picture, I will have a cleaner dirty google search experience.

Meditation will increase your ability to add habits because of the improved clarity, focus, and awareness. With a meditation habit, you can maintain more habits. Meditation doesn't take, it just adds. Start with a 20 minutes a day, and notice the difference in your energy levels and performance. Then you can decide the number of habits you want to improve.

I wish I could live there forever! The sea close to the beach was green, like really, really bright green, almost fluorescent teal. Very pure, and with foam. The waves were strong and violent, almost tidal. And into the horizon, deep blue sea. That's where I did my retreat two months and a half ago. It was the best experience of my life.

https://m.youtube.com/user/yogawithadriene

If only @Nahm What a loopy world it is.

@LostSoul You're welcome