Lyubov

what is attractive about men? please put it in layman's terms.

agreed, dated goofy crap for the most part that grifted off a lot of insecure men David Deida - The Way of The Superior Man (book) Mark Manson - Models (book) The Natural Lifestyles (youtube) The Fearless Man (youtube)

I don't necessarily disagree with everything you said but also I see it differently. They are toxic, and I had poor boundaries which I let them cross more than once. I doubt I was entirely innocent in the whole ordeal either. It's a learning experience either way and I'm tired with the whole look inward bs jargon. I do plenty of that consistently. The most authentic thing I can do now from all of this is rant and feel angry cause that is how I feel about the situation. I think in the long term I need to hold to my boundaries better and be a little wiser when I see them slipping. I tend to be pretty lenient cause I like to give people the benefit of the doubt they are on the same page of respect and mindfulness as me but also I don't like neurotically manage stuff like this. I don't like to try to control problems and relationships and I doubt the experience of toxic people ever goes away fully. Relationships can be messy. In the long run I would rather cultivate emotional resilience and wisdom cause it's unavoidable that problems will occasionally arise sometimes between people but being able to handle the storms in a healthy way communicate better and be wiser when signs are showing is always possible.

Basically the last time I confronted them and told them I didn't have energy to talk to them regularly (giving myself space cause I had emotions for them and our lives didn't align) they got angry at me and freaked out. The ordeal lead to me telling them I liked them and a few weeks later they wrote me asking if I wanted to talk again regularly and I did so we picked up where we left off. Fast forward three months later they say they wanna go on a holiday somewhere and I say me too, they say let's go, so we talk about it a bit. No solid plans, I'm aware it may not happen and not to over invest. Anyways today she says she is excited cause another guy she is into is interested and wants to go with him. No solid plans were made but it feels kinda shit and I think this is pretty clear they don't feel the same way I do about them. Last time they got mad and pissy at me for being more confronting and telling them I wanted space, I'm just unfollowing them and not responding to anything they write me now. I feel sort of like their therapist rather than a healthy relationships of sorts and they don't feel the same way about me. I have no interest orbiting around as an alternative option for them so I'm ghosting them. Not wasting energy on this. Save the confronting for relationships that are worth saving. This is going no where and I await them spamming me asking why I'm ignoring them instead of taking a hint...

I'm going to state a somewhat dissenting opinion when it comes to this topic. I do support a societal reevaluation and some more regulation in this industry if it warrants it. There is a ton of devilry in the supplement industry. A lot of shit will make it to store shelves and you don't even know if what you are getting is actually it, purity, quality, etc. On top of that, we have talk of medicine men in here. The whole point of the medicine man is that he follows a tradition and training that has been passed down through tons of trial and error. Just cause someone read online some vitamin or alternative medicine will help them and goes out and buys it doesn't mean they have actually been trained to use it properly or if it conflicts with anything else they are taking. I support alternative medicine and realize mainstream medicine is more conservative but I don't think that is entirely a bad thing. There are tons crooks and wackos out there that have scammed a ton in the supplement industry. Mainstream medicine also will fall into this trap but there is at least more oversight and discourse when it comes to it.

Alcohol is as old as the hills and part of the whole. It has caused problems for many people but let's also honor the benefits it has also given people. It has helped people socialize and even survive in more brutal times such as during war. I don't abide by the demonization of alcohol. It is for the most part a dysfunctional activity but also has served it's purpose. I think it can be used consciously. It has served as a catalyst for people to learn that being unconscious doesn't feel good. Today one can enjoy it occasionally like having a glass of wine or a nice craft beer. It's up to the individual to learn how to use alcohol.

lol are the girls in that link even real in the sense that it isn't some bait and switch? I bet it costs quite a bit to hire one of them for an entire night. You gotta be really loaded. I like how it is legal and clean in the EU. I don't partake in this in this living in the US.... ew... It has a much dirtier connotation and is illegal and the women that work in this job in the US tend to be associated with addiction, STDs and mental problems. Not to mention human trafficking. I think due to the systemic issues in the US it is an unwise and unsafe activity here. I have to admit though, there is something hot about hiring a high class European escort in Amsterdam through some sort of luxury agency. Just seems cleaner and safer there and the culture looks at it differently giving it a much cleaner and safer connotation. I have no doubt it's expensive. I was curious so I googled prices and yep... starts at 1000 euros there If I had the cash to burn and the safe and clean system in Europe I don't think it would be a problem to engage in occasionally if it freed up and solved the desire for sex. Would allow one to focus on other stuff and probably come off less needy too when dating.

went through this with them once before where I was honest and open and they got super defensive, angry and were gaslighting me and seemed to lack the ability to work through any of this with me. they instantly started getting mad at me this time so no, I'm done with them. We had a second fight yesterday where they did the exact same thing. it's unhealthy and it's time for me to move on from their toxicity.

I wish I could get it sooner. Wish the rollout would speed up. I'm in the last group eligible for it since I have no health problems and am in my 20s.

Yeah, I noticed the dynamic is just different these days in the US. I’m assuming this statistic is from the US? Dating is kinda strange in the US rn. The masculine/feminine dynamic is odd and the women just don’t seem that interested in men in general and men seem to sort of act the same. Just this weird neutral dynamic where men don’t pursue like they used to and women seem more on guard for their safety. I’m comparing this to what I’ve seen in other countries. The dynamic definitely feels different in the US compared to other places. People ofc are still dating but I wonder why it seems like a lot of guys are having problems? It’s apparently gonna be a huge epidemic in China and India where there are more guys than girls. In the USA it’s at least even.

I've noticed this myself and then I saw someone in a post effectively say this yellow admires blue green admires green orange admires red blue admires purple red admires orange I've noticed in my own introspection that I find healthy blue to be incredibly interesting and aspiring. Anyone else notice these trends?

It's more so my own grief surfacing and anger I've been holding onto. I'm feeling a bit better now but lets see how it goes.

The entire country was originally colonized, pillaged and overtaken with guns. That conqueror don't tread on me bullshit has permeated the culture ever since.

if you're dreaming a human body you're dreaming all the physical laws as well since they basically collapse together with the very notion of there being a limited human body that can and cannot do stuff. Wanna float or fly, learn to astral project.

Yeah that is sorta why I wrote this thread. It made me feel better and understand how I'm feeling more. I'm focusing on whatever comes up and feeling it. This whole thing is making me feel incredibly angry, jealous and like I'm not attractive or good enough so I'm just noticing that come up and feeling it fully and express itself w/o getting carried away. thanks @Preety_India

I agree. This thread seems like a pity party I'm just exhausted of this weird dynamic and it feels like they are playing mind games with me or using me for some sort of approval sometimes. I can't say I'm innocent here. I've gotten a feeling of not being alone when lonely and having them to talk to but I just don't se this going anywhere and after the first time we fought I'm not interested in doing it a second time.

I feel I'm being a little toxic now but at the same time this is what feels most authentic to me and I'm tired of handling things between us with kid gloves. It's annoying and fake. I really don't care if it confuses them. Not my problem if they can't take a hint or have some degree of understanding of what's going on or why I would feel hurt. I need to take care of myself first. There is just something at it's root deeply dishonest about this relationship if I told her I like her and I'm talking to her cause part of me is holding out for something to happen between us. I don't want to have to deal with her drama getting pissy cause I don't wanna talk to her. She was so dense the last time she couldn't take a fucking hint when I wasn't replying to her messages daily that obviously talking to her would no longer be my top priority. This time whatever. It's over and it's time to move on for me.

yes, I'm 1200. trying to get to 2000 one day.

I don't think that's true. Sometimes it feels this way when life gets hard and relationships don't work out. We can get sort of locked into focusing on negative patterns and get caught up in these illusions.

The "ego is the enemy approach" often cuts people off from awakening to unconditional love. Maybe it works and resonates for some people to get them to a certain point but I've noticed the people that preach it sort of have a rigidity to them and a poor level of systems, holism and integrative thinking when it comes to spiritual modalities. I outgrew the enemy ego stuff a few years ago and it lead to much deeper growth for me.

Gay men play game A just as much as everyone else lol. They have their own jargon and use the same rating system and are screening and judging their options and playing the field just as much as the next person. Being gay doesn't mean you are playing a different game. We are just more open and accepting and allowing people to play game A to fulfill desires we didn't used to allow be fulfilled. Like I said I'll read the thread a second time but all I see is you stating your green values and preferences for a partner and labeling it as something different than what the rest are doing when it's fundamentally the same, just different values and preferences. The logic behind your game b follows the same classic green trope actually where they think all is love if we just put the guns and nukes down and come together lol. You haven't solved game A which you are intrenched in.

I will take a second look through the thread to see if anything changes my mind but I'm really not seeing anything in here besides dressing up / interpreting classic game A survival in a way that makes it seem more appealing and in line with your own personal values and desires. This is an important part of survival. Putting it into context. I still only see in this thread a discussion on game A with the willingness to play it consciously and focus less on stuff stage orange people like vs green.

@Preety_India I just don’t see many points in your distinctions for what game b is. You said yourself you don’t really have a fixed vision for it. Game B isn't a thing. Just as not having to survive doesn’t exist for something that is living. You are still playing game A in all your posts. You are just listing compromises and preferences for what you want in a relationship and your willingness to not have to unconsciously manipulate and scheme for them. There is only game A. Playing it consciously though is a choice and I agree with this.

there isn't one, just as there isn't one to working for money or taking a shower/bath to clean yourself. When you find solutions to those let me know. Game B is wherever those are.