Someone here

I use a homemade fleshlight. I made it from sponge and gloves and olive oil as a lubricant. Here :

What does it mean ?

Yeah I'm planning to Not touch it for three months In hope to regain the sensitivity. I Will also apply olive oil to it daily and see how that works out . Idk there is certainly creams and products I Can use for this sort of issue but I Didn't find any online . Maybe I Should go to a pharmacy and ask there.

@GreenWoods No. Happiness solely depends on how we see things, since everything we see and sense is through our subjective perception of reality. Thus if we change our perception, viewpoint in the right way, we can change how we see, experience reality around us. On the other hand in order to change our inherently selfish, egoistic and hateful nature and perception ..that gives us the picture, movie of this hostile, dark, self-destructive world ..we need external factors, the proper “laboratory conditions”: the perfect, purposeful environment. It sucks.

Thoughts come from nowhere and from everywhere! I think both contain an element of truth. Subjectively, our thoughts come from nowhere: they just pop into our heads, or emerge in the form of words leaving our mouths. Objectively, we can say that thoughts emerge from neural processes, and that neural processes come from everywhere. What I mean by this is that the forms and dynamics of thought are influenced by everything that has a causal connection with you, your society, and your species

@GreenWoods look ...In general happiness depends upon the way you perceive life External factors may make your day, and make you smile, but if you are not happy, or are sad in the first place, they will not make you happy. Happiness is a decision. a choice, and it comes from within, not from without.

I'm done arguing with you . This is pointless.

No you've got a wrong view about India. I live in Kashmir.and its pretty clean and healthy city .one of the best actually.

I practice mindfulness meditation every day. The problem is I can depend on my willpower for a week max . But after that I get huge urges .I miss the nicotine flavour. I feel like I'm going to die from angst and desperation if I don't smoke a cig. It helps me deal with my overly stressful life . I'm not even sure if I should quit .or If I can quit . I switched to vaping .and I hope its less toxic than regular ciggs.

I'm not completely sure, but I can tell you my journey with nicotine. I started smoking cigarettes to impress girls in high school when I was 16. I got diagnosed with severe asthma at 18. Spent years trying to quit, in and out of the hospital so many times I lost count. I am now 25 and have been vaping for about 2 months. I have not had to use my inhaler and have not been hospitalized once since I switched to vaping. So all I can say is switching to vaping has helped my health immensely.

No .I'm experienced with talking and approaching girls . I told you I talk to at least one new girl everyday .it's a challenge I have set for myself. Here:

External factors can trigger you to feel happiness (peace, contentment, joy), but the same factors can trigger someone else to feel sadness. Equanimity regardless of external factors ( deemed good or deemed bad ) is key. The way we see life is key; the lens through which we judge the experiences of life is the single most important determining factor in our level of daily happiness. When we cultivate the happiness habit, consciously making being happy (peaceful, contented, joyful) a normal state of mind, we can appreciate when things happen as we wish. Just as importantly, we also can be at peace when external situations are not to our liking, because we nurture happiness within that we can visit whenever we choose. Our experience of life becomes very light when we understand we cannot control all of what happens in our lives, but we can control how we react to what happens. If We do not hang our level of happiness on what goes on outside of us, but we stay at peace feeling contentment and happiness regardless of outside factors..Ultimately we realize that happiness is our natural state of being, and at any moment we can choose to begin to live our happily ever after.

I mean I can use my imagination and get hard ..but it's easier to watch porn than to hold a flimsy image in your mind . Anyways..to each his own.

Thank for the feedback. Nope ..I'm not seeking to stroke my spiritual ego or anything like that . This post highlights how I became enlightened and I thought to share it with the community for any serious seeker for truth . Nisargadatta maharaj was one of the greatest enlightened teachers ever . If you read his works you will immediately extract the wisdom and it will benefit you you greatly in your spiritual quest. Also that video contains very direct and effective quotes from him that points you directly to your true nature . Also silence is a crucial thing for seeking enlightenment according to all Eastern traditions. Because it makes you focus inward and not outward. The “outside” orientation is prevalent among humans, they nearly constantly focus outward onto the world, onto other people, onto life happening around them. There are few occasions on which humans turn inward and focus on the life happening within them. Such turning inward is essential for anyone seeking spiritual anything, let alone enlightenment. Such focusing inward is much easier to achieve and sustain if one isn’t distracted by trying to connect with that which is outward, like other people.

I can pop a boner whenever I want . With or without porn . What I meant is I find it boring to fap while staring at the wall . You need to be looking at hot stuff to arouse you properly.

Yeah not a fan of his teaching, main reason being is it's to direct and dose not accommodate to the fact everyone is at different levels of understanding so it will just resonate with a very small niche audience, I just think it could be done with a bit more empathy. But if it resonates and it helps nothing wrong with that .

Thanks .glad you found it helpful

@flowboy bro you are just trolling at this point. Go do something productive with your time.

I love you too . Sorry if I offended you. I sometimes just get a little bit too excited or caught up in my conceptual worldview so pardon me . Trust me ..you won't find anyone more open minded than me in this whole world . A bold claim but then again..Is being skeptical and questioning everything a trait of open-mindedness or close mindedness in your opinion? Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away. That's my definition . So all the things you mentioned are real . You’re staring at it right now. Beliefs and opinions, on the other hand, only belong to our individual experience thus are illusory on an absolute level but in order to maintain your sense of identity/reality you have to have them Reality doesn’t require thought. Hearing the snapping of two fingers is enough to know reality. Google it . Its the branch of spirituality that focuses too much of the Buddhist teaching of anatman or no-self . That's simply your projection. I listened to their "message " enough times .its the same no-self rehashed over and over again with nothing new . "It's THIS" "boundless energy " "there is no you ""it's just what's happening ". Hard to extract a useful application to my life from such message .

What do you mean it's not real ? You are living in a world where things exist. Your bed, your handheld device, your door, your friends, your family, your pet.. Everything that you can feel, hear, touch, taste, and smell is reality. Take a break from Neo advaita BS.

I had a blowjob from a hooker in Thailand few weeks ago .but that's about it .I'm back to India now where women are not easily sexually open. I talk to at least one new girl every day .that's a challenge I have set for myself. So I know what works and what doesn't in attracting girls. Especially in the first date/approach.

Unfortunately, we can’t avoid it, it is all part of the great big learning curve we call Life! We experience it to learn our lessons. There is a saying Enjoy what we can - Endure what we must ! So embrace it without wallowing in it , and think about what the experience has taught you.

That's just simply not possible. Happiness and suffering are conditions of your mind . Your interior state of being. Your resistance to what's happening vs your acceptance and embrace of it . It doesn't depend on external conditions . Don't go thinking that billionaires and people who eat the best food and bang hot chicks everyday are happy ..they have everything. And the paradoxical counterintuitive thing is that when you have everything you wish for then you will feel like you have nothing. You will feel empty and listless and sad . Because happiness (true happiness) doesn't come from anywhere other than within you. "the Kingdom of heaven is within you"-Jesus.

So is your point that trying to overcome suffering is resistance to suffering and it perpetuates suffering? Because I don't disagree in that point . The overcome I'm talking about is not resistance. But acceptance. When something goes wrong, most people resist it. “This shouldn’t be happening!” Goes the inner dialogue. The resistance comes from a good place..a wish for things to be going “right,” and for you to be okay. But it’s not actually doing you any good. Because resistance is the main thing that causes us to suffer when we feel pain.

There is truth to this perspective. However this thread should not be an advanced guide to solve porn addiction .or any addiction really. Maybe most people need to visit therapists .but this is just a simple hack that can ease the way . Everyone ie seeking pleasure and fulfilment in one way or another. Even the religious ascetics never just abstained from the pleasures of the flesh they run towards the pleasures of the spirit. Masochists while inflicting pain search for pleasure. What pleasure is can be discussed, but we are built to seek it. I mean porn is only possible because of built in sexual pleasure centers. Ancient cultures covered women head to toe not because of some "oppresion" but because they knew the impact of seeing skin on the sexual centers. And when I say ancient I mean before WWII. . That is why I think women should cover themselves even today, not because of religious god will kill stuff, but out of care for men and their mental and physical health.