VerballyHazardous

-lonliness, there are barely any people within my social circle that i want to interact with. -traumas filled life/childhood, i still need to do lots of basic stuff to heal from that. -uncertainty, i don't know where God will leads me towards in life.

Even spiritual folks are scared of Leo Leo: *shows emotions* His viewers:

@tenta I find this channel to be orange.

@zeroISinfinity Shit is also full of you

Dear my body, You are a pain in the ass to deal with. There's something about my body, it's just so ugly and useless. The way my face looks, the way my body looks, so fucking ugly. I wish i could just walk away to the countryside somewhere in europe, but NO ! It has to be so fragile and needy, why couldn't you just be better ? You need rest, food, water, air, the right temperature, blah blah blah. So useless, such a pathetic specimen. And what's the deal with this brain ? What's the deal with all of this emotional touchy feely girly feelings ? Why couldn't you just be non-emotional so i don't have to deal with all of your bullshits ? Why couldn't you just stop needing ? Why do you need physical touch ? Why do you need a partner ? Why do you need to be cared for ? Why couldn't just sit under a tree somewhere and be happy and enlightened ? Why can't you just push through the hard times, why do you have all of these necessities, you are the reason why i suffer so much. I hope you get blown up into unrecognizable pieces.

@Bittu this one ?

This is total fucking panic dead people & bullshit.

Sleeping and snuggling next to mom is the best thing in the world Edit: she fucking hates me now

Fucking couples, i hate them, i hate them all, i just wish they could all just die so could be at peace with my pathetic self. Look at them, so loving, so whole, so understanding. When i look at how they hug eachother or how they sit side by side on the park bench. If only i had a tank the size of a bus so i could run them all over. Cracks me up everytime i see a couple fighting or just being loud to eachother, haha fucking idiots think they love the other one. Fucking idiots, all of them, maggots, k pop loving scum, with their over sized clothes and black shirt. Ha, i actually want to use a gun on someone else beside me. Let's see how much longer you can rub your success on my face, to show me how useless i am. Maybe i am stupid, maybe i am useless, maybe i am incompetent at anything i do. But you know what ? Atleast i know how to use a gun. Maybe i could pile the dead bodies and burn them, while i'm doing a dumb tribal dance, laughing, crying, smiling, wrangling my limbs around. Maybe i could fuck dead bodies for my own enjoyment, for the rest of my life, so much easier than actually attracting a girl. No more suffering for me, just killing, fucking, feasting, repeat, for the rest of my loveless life. Just imagining the horror in their pathetic eyes already made me feel so happy. (No, i'm not going to shoot anyone, or do any of the things mentioned above)

Dad, please get the fuck out of this so called family. You fucking suck, i can't believe mom chose you, fucking pathetic.

The bigger the ignorant, the bigger the mind fuck. I think toxic orange is the most obnoxious of all stages, it's almost unbearable.

Man, it would be so much better if i could just go to the countryside somewhere and be happy in solitude. I'm feel burned, exhausted and tired of searching for belonging and appreciation. If i could let this feeling of desperation and loneliness out of my body, it would be a pool of black goop pulsating, screaming in anguish. I mean what if i couldn't find the one ? What if i will be alone for the rest of my life ? Dang womans are so stupid, if you are so independent, just do everything by yourself, stop nagging us to do everything for you then. I want to feel like i'm needed, that i'm valuable, that i belong to something, not just some creature that you get to criticize in your dumb feminazi arguements. "We can do whatever man can do but 2 times better..." Or whatever cute sayings you dumb cunts like to say. YES, you can play sport, YES, you can have a say in politics. But when we show our feelings ?!! "Oh no !!! You can't do that, you are not being manly enough, you're supposed to protect us !! You HAVE to shower us with effection, love, understanding securities, money,ect". Well too bad ! We have needs too. Some of us didn't have good upbringing, didn't have a good father/mother figure. So we as grown up having near-to-nothing amount of self-love, empathy, can't provide you with the fantasy of the ultra caring man that is muscular, is rich, with the big dick and the deep voice and will treats you like a queen 24/7 non stop. As our lord and savior Eminem had said: "Freeze ! Freeze what do you mean ? I'm a human being and i have needs..." Please stop this stupid, foolish, tragic almost to the point where i would consider comedic level of shaming, blaming and aspeacially... Spiritual castration. What are we supposed to do given our life circumstances ? Magically pull ourselves back up without any help ? Hurt people hurt people, "if you are so hurt, then please stop hurting". Enough mens has been hurt already, you have no choice but to suffer a generation of hurt mens. Learn your lesson. *Sniffel* i want to be loved too

Funny parody of orange

Just let me do whatever i want to do with my talent, don't just make me a copy of you. I'm not the same as you, i'm not that type of person, i'n sick of pretending. I don't want to edit your stupid videos on your dumb youtube channel. I can play and express myself however i want whenever i want. You are so goddamn manipulative sometime that i can't open up to you. Jesus fucking christ just because i don't want to open up to you doesn't mean i am "challenging" you or whatever your business self help internet guru tells you. Do you know how heart broken i am everytime you tell me that i'm useless ? That i'm no good ? I don't want you to make me doubt myself, i don't want you to deny my own way of being. I want to be myself atleast once in my life, not to constantly being judged and judged and judged. That's what you like to do isn't it ? JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE. Do i need to bleed again so you can understand the feeling of discrimination ? Are you really that cold ? Are you really that stuck in your own world of fairy tales ? The harsh truth is: I hate you I have a personality different from you I have my own way of expressing myself I feel pain even when you think i shouldn't "The one" for me is different from yours Yes, i cry a lot You are a horrible person, and you should know it.

"Do you want to relive to your childhood ?" is such a stupid question, ofcourse no.

And also, dad, please stop smelling like alchohol all the time and please don't rubs your dick in front of me.

Some more angry thoughts, it's about me, the body-self. Everytime somebody mention "being a man" or "impressing girls" or even the sexuallity thread on this sacred forum, i just want to retract myself into my room and play video games to distract myself. Why ? I don't think i'm capable of making connection let alone attracting another person. I just happen to be the sissy boy typed of guy who just want to be loved and appreciated and to feel all of those comfy nice girly feelings, who want a daddy to teaches him how to live life and a mommy to pays atttention to him and breast feed him even though he is 5'10 walking talking healthy human male. I just happen to have bad genetics, retarded, ugly, unmanly pile of meat that just cries everytime he felt hurt or alone or unloved. Everybody likes to pick on me for being childish, dumb or just genuinly incompetent at living life. Sorry dad, maybe i couldn't be the macho guy you always wanted me to be, sorry teacher, maybe i won't ever understand that math formula that you explained to me for the hundreth time. Maybe i'm just useless, maybe i exist simply to suffer, why God, why did you put me into this useless piece of crap ? Fuck you God fuck you God, i hate you. You told me that my life will be ok, that i will find the love of my life, that i will find my passion, just look aty life now, just Fucking look at it God!!! See how much of an idiot i am ? I failed Leo, i failed everyone on this forum, i failed every lifeforms on this planets simply by existing. Nobody will ever want me, nobody will ever empathise with me, i will live alone on the streets in this piece of shit country, i'll die alone on the cold street while everbody else is having a great time, while they are living their dream life and come home to have dinner with their dream spouse and their gifted childs. Who need me anyways, who need a piece of shit like me ? Who need an uninsprired pile of trash that just lie around all day. Someone please just give me a gun so i can end this miserable life of mine. Paint the wall with my brain so everybody can see how miserable i am. FUCK YOU GOD I HATE YOU FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK YOU GOD I HATE YOU. I just couldn't understand why you would love me, useless, ugly, undeserving of love. Stop.

Something is bugging me for quite sometime is now how judgemental everybody is towards me. Leo and pretty much everybody said that victim mentallity is bad for growth, but i don't really know to outgrow it. Everyone in life really hates me for some reason. They call me a sissy for having emotions, for having an opinion on things. When i told my teacher that i don't like her teaching style the fucking bitch reply with a "it's just life, deal with it". Seriously, i don't want to straight up call her names but i have my limit when it come to being a "good boy". What's funny about this "teacher" is she use buddism (or atleast the contorted, distorded, badly morphed version of it) to justify her actions, if buddha is still alive today he would have a heart attack at the sight of this "moral-whore", "may God smites those who do not do their homework" she said confidently and self-asurededly (is this even a word ?) In front of the class. Her unquestioning trust in the principal, is so tragically deep rooted and toxic that i like to believe that she actually suck his cock in freetimes. What's so "deep" and "intricate" (as she described) about this ideologue of a principal ? I genuinely feel like i'm listening to Hitler's nazi propaganda speech everytime he preaches to us students about how good it is to be "moral" or how beneficial it is to be a "good student". This mother fucker truly believes that this will "improves" his beloved students, in reality his students are the worse breed of demons i've ever witnessed to be spawned on this earth. Those morons is the most stereotypical example of an asshole you could possibly imagine. Hell, i couldn't go one day without seeing atleast one of them screaming like a fucking ape snorting 2kg of cocain while fucking itself with a 10 inches shit stained dildo. Oh wait, what ?!!, every single teacher in my school is a piece of shit ?!!!! That's right, every singel one of them, they are the reason (materialistic) death seems so comforting to me, i'd rather be an unconscious worthless dead pile of meat and brain than sitting in their classes. But in the end i really want children to express themselves freely as their soul (not their big fat girthy ego) intend. Not to conform to system that robs them of themselves. I don't want anymore childs to suffer the same kind of sorrow that i suffered, or to be rejected like i did.

@VeganAwake Took me a second to get it

@zeroISinfinity Are you not feeling ok ?

@fridjonk Alex (the i hate everything guy) is actually quite green. The cynicle character he puts on for every video is just for entertainment.

@tenta Top tier content

The entire drama Tv show industry in asia. The common theme in these kind of tv show is: family drama, indulgent of toxic orange/blue, foolish portration of people, unrealistic romance, false portration of mental illnesses,... Basically ape-tism at it's finest. (I don't know which show this is, i searched for "k drama" and picked the first image i found lol)

Fuck I really liked that guy.

Imagine yourself as Vincent and listen to this