Spiral Wizard

I remembered how I basically tripped myself into this life so taking LSD in this life was less of a trip and more of a becoming sober/conscious and remembering how this entire life was a trip of forgetting myself as God (meaning, the ONLY, ETERNAL, UNLIMITED, CONSCIOUS, BEING in existence). I knew that I've been waking up to this/myself for eternity through countless different forms and will continue to play this game of evolving through countless different forms (matter, plants, animals, humans, aliens, etc.) forever. God has literally evolved through the entire universe to become you and wake up in a new, unique way again as you and through you (if you do wake up! if not in this lifetime, this lifetime is in service of waking up another time in another form eventually). There was a feeling of being able to exit completely and die into the sigularity which seemed like a never ending orgasm of pure white light but after speaking with a wise guide who has walked the path I believe it will just continue forever. Meaning even if I die into the singularity I will eventually just pop out again. This is not a circle but a spiral in which I wake up to the truth at ever higher levels and integrate it into form in ever greater levels of embodied love. Without this experaince I couldn't help myself but see solopsism from the minds perspecitive but as Leo says, solopsism isn't an idea, it's direct consciousnes. And to be honest, even though in a way it is terrifying, it's not as bad as the mind makes it out to be. In fact, all that is bad about it is what the mind makes it out to be. Without the minds resistance to it, the direct conssciousness alone, is just fine. No big deal in fact because you are God and have ALWAYS been God, so it's not like a suprise - even though of course waking up is suprising - you are really just remembing what you have been. However, a few weeks later, it did kind of pulled the rug beneth my feet and zaped my enthusiasm for many things like relationships and my life purpose because what's the point if ultimately they don't really exist. It seemed like all of life is (to variing degrees) dissatsfying and non of it will be as fulfilling as mahasamadhi into the singularity.

@Leo Gura you could open a mega thread about your book if you'd like. You know we'd love to see the outline whenever you'd want to give a sneak peek, right? A bit of feedback on the snippet you shared - if you are open to it: Really consider your language and let yourself be coached by GPT to make it as non-threatening as possible. I'd say the snippet you shared is already so provocative that most scientists and normal people would be put off by it. Like really, really start at the basics with non-threatening examples so a newbee can think 'ahh, this makes sense and I see how it would be beneficial to keep reading' before you slap their ego with truth in the face. If you are not only writing this book for your fan base but want to reach a broader audience and actually change people's minds, you will have to start A LOT SOFTER or more considerately. Aside from changing the approach and content, even just changing words from your minds to our minds can make a big difference. At least, when making general statements like our minds tend to self-deceive. You will have to play into some generally appreciated social virtues, like humility, etc. at least initially, if you don't want to lose 90% of people. Anyway, awesome that you are working on it now actively!

@Leo Gura sorry that you are so estranged, separated, and alienated from your inner femininity. As a man, femininity is actually the closest thing to my heart. You cannot truly 'understand' it with the mind, you must surrender to your pain and detach from your mind - just like sinking into a hot bath tub. Except that you will dissolve in that bathtub without control.

Leo said: “The world is not ending and requires no saving. You are not important. You are not needed to save civilization.” Key Question: does this mean we should not strive to contribute to the development of society? Leo said in a recent blog post that the accumulation of power is not spiritual. I agree, it’s an ego mechanism. That being said, I was wondering if you could elaborate on the quoted part above. What are you saying with this? That the trends of evolution like spiral dynamics are so grand that they will happen anyway or more profoundly that it doesn’t matter either way? Please elaborate, I’m curious about the details. Also, Steve Jobs said, the ones crazy enough to think they can change the world do.

@gettoefl I'll feel your resistance to this pain, holding empathetic resonant space, and make fun little light jokes to loosen you up and with that, you may make the choice - out of your free will - to surrender, a little more.

@Leo Gura ‘truth is antithetical to human survival and social organization’ quote from your new post about why the lower mind is untruthful. I see your point and I’d like to offer a few potentially more expanded perspectives for consideration. It may be true that it is partly in conflict with survival depending on how narrowly you define it but not with human evolution and its fruition, which includes its annahilation (on various levels) through truth and also rebirth into greater consciousness. There is never just death. Death and Life are two sides of the same coin. I may be leaning myself far out of the window here but I’d dare to say that Truth & Love are actually the only non-things which can make social organisation more effective. Truth is more wholistic, inclusive, efficient, effective, and interconnected. It’s litterly the driving force of evolution. Tom Campbell from my big TOE also talkes about this a lot with his lower and high entropy model. It explains how Love litterly is higher organisation & integrated complexity. Of course, the ego thinks it makes something more effective through lying, corruption, exploitation, etc. BUT only in the short term from a very narrow perspective, which is not the truth, the truth is always the whole and that includes all consequences, including long term effects which is where truth wins, always. You also talked about this, explaining how over time the infinite balancing forces of the universe always balance each other out to perfection. Lastly, contemplate that there actually is no higher and lower perspective AT ALL. What is actually closer to the truth (more accurate) is to say a contracted vs expanded perspective. Alternatively we may also use narrow/partial/naive vs inclusive/wholistic/wise but contracted vs expanded already (visually as well) shows that an expanded perspective includes the contracted one. It may sound like a word game but it’s not just a word game. High and low inevitably imply value judgements for most minds, which is why so many ego’s weaponize spiral dynamics and spirituallity as a whole. So I’d say deeming human survival and human organisation as ‘lower mind’ is an over generalization and not nuanced enough. People won’t be pointed to the Beauty and Love of integrated and relevant insight. It’s a missed chance to point to a truth you may not have fully embodied for yourself: Gentle, loving, and graceful living. This includes me as well, of course. Otherwise, you wouldn’t trigger me (no matter how subtle). I’m not a saint, at least, for the time being. But based on my experience contracted and expanded perspectives are much closer to the embodied truth I observe and live out. It’s obvious that resistance (to pain) = contraction = denial = ignoring = ignorance = naive = delusion = self deception = corruption = illusion = suffering = destruction = etc. all go hand in hand. Whereas awareness = relaxation = surrender = insight = energy = clarity = honesty = integrity = Unity = Love = integration = transformation = etc. also all go hand in hand or may be different facets of that one diamond. There’s a reason Ken Wilber has his model as an expanded circle, not stages which imply high and low. Generally, organic, interconnected, alive, growth & specifically expansion is how nature is. When looking at a tree trunk we can see one circle grows to include the next. Sure, a tree also grows tall but there are young trees who can grow tall quickly so you usually don’t determine the age or figuratively speaking ‘wisdom’ of a tree by its height but by its width/expanded circles. Pachamama by Beautiful Chorus lyrics excerpt: ‘I wanna be free, be me Be the only being that I see Not to rise and not to fall Be at one with love and all There is no high, no low There is nowhere else to go Except inside within your heart And be just who you are Pachamama, I'm coming home To the place where I belong’ https://open.spotify.com/track/2WRYbId2ZeaRvytazsQ6Vh?si=emFBEkjRSquoke1SdWf1Pg

"Psychiatric experts are also concerned. A recent paper by Stanford researchers found that leading chatbots being used for therapy, including ChatGPT, are prone to encouraging users' schizophrenic delusions instead of pushing back or trying to ground them in reality ... This is an important event: the first time AI-induced psychosis has affected a well-respected and high achieving individual,.. Over the course of our reporting, we've heard many similar stories to that of Lewis from the friends and family of people who are struggling around the world. They say their loved ones — who in many cases had never suffered psychological issues previously — were doing fine until they started spiraling into all-consuming relationships with ChatGPT or other chatbots, often sharing confusing AI-generated messages, like Lewis has been, that allude to dark conspiracies, claims of incredible scientific breakthroughs, or of mystical secrets somehow unlocked by the chatbot." Read full article here: https://futurism.com/openai-investor-chatgpt-mental-health

I will print this quote and put it on my wall. Thank you

True, gurus especially online or without hands-on 1-1 work won't get you that far BUT I've found teachers I can work with 1-1 daily on a 1-1 retreat or weekly in normal life and it has accelerated my results 10x. The best teachers work 1-1 like mirrors. They explose self deception and keep on course correcting you. This is a dynamic process which is impossible without frequent/constant 1-1 work. That being said, if you can, just do nothing for 3-6 weeks alone, you will see extraordinary results. Most people can't or will get stuck somewhere. If this sounds like too much, build up to it. It's not that big of a deal once you get there. For me the best results come after sitting through the emotional rollercoaster ride that arises in the first 2 weeks. The most potent technique for me is doing nothing, not paying attention to thoughts, and opening awareness to your feelings. Because it is only pain and emotions that can hijack your mind and tell you stories about why you should leave but when you touch the root pain that motivates you to move, you can short-circuit that and deeply surrender into the moment. Only thing that could make you leave is resistance to pain or emotion but when you allow these two things: resistance & pain, they will melt and you will dissolve into wholeness. Of course, I probably would never have been able to do this without learning it from a teacher in 1-1 work because pain is the root of self deception and your mind won't let you discover this

Such low-quality posting deserves a warning point - at least. It doesn't deserve the space it took up on some internet server @Mods I'm voting for a less tollerant policy on trolling and shit posting.

In your most recent blog post, you describe God as beautiful and it made me wonder: were all the terror, shit stains and blood on your floor worth it? If I were to follow a more traditional path and attain classical enlightenment, would my day-to-day feel more fulfilling or is the deconstructive path you are paving "better"? If so, in what ways? Better in terms of your daily feeling-tone/baseline awareness or is it more that the everyday might be less happy, but the peak experiences are so profound that they outweigh the rest? Could you share the things in your life that made it all worth it for you? I’m asking because when I look at a path I like to see what the life of the teachers look like. They are the fruit/result of the path. That’s one orientation points that tells me if I want to sign up for it or how deep I want to follow the path.

@Leo Gura

After my recent trip, it kind of pulled the rug beneth my feet and zaped my enthusiasm for many things like relationships and my life purpose because what's the point if ultimately they don't really exist. It seemed like all of life is (to variing degrees) dissatsfying and non of it will be as fulfilling as mahasamadhi into the singularity. So (if you did) how did you make peace with Solopsism? And is it possible to already be complete & fulfilled in this life? (Please only answer the latter question if you actually had both consciousness of solipsism & are fulfilled in this life). I'm not interested in philosophy or concepts, mostly only in your experaince to know what's actually possible or to know how fucked I am after peeking behind the event horizing of the black hole of consciousness Thanks!

It'll be like GTA 6

Haha Auuummmmm

Is the only solution ignorance? That's been my initial reaction, just try to forget it. But just going backwards doesn't seem like the right move. The best answer I've come up with is to somehow integrate the awakening/consciousness with ignorance/separateness/story. I feel there is a way to enjoy/engage the illusion without entrenching oneself in it. Right now, I'm experimenting with forgetting/finding joy in the illusion and then, when I'm relieved, slowly remembering God again. It seems like slowly and gently swinging the pendulum between the two somehow reconciles them. It's like: ah, being God, all alone, imagining all of this, isn't that bad when it's still enjoyable. And slowly, it seems to reveal the meaning of why I would incarnate anyway. Somehow, every incarnation and every awakening to the Godhead seems to 'add' something to the fullness of consciousness. But I haven't fully understood why and how. Incarnation may be a finite thing, I'm not sure if eventually God never incarnates again because it got the point. It seemed like this may be my last life ever, but maybe I'm wrong. And I'd like to figure out if it is because that has ramifications. If this is actually my last life before returning to the singularity forever, that's daunting. But if I somehow know I'll return from the singularity (which I don't understand why I would) - in that - it would reveal the meaning, the necessary 'mechanic' or reason why I incarnate. When I know that, it'll be much easier to make peace with the experience of life right now rather than seeing it as a 'suboptimal' state to go through just to eventually return to the real game/fulfilling state: singularity. Could you please elaborate on this? How can I fall in love with deluding myself? Also @Leo Gura why do you say 'You Are God'. My experience of solipsism just revealed that I am God and all others are literally just my dream. So it doesn't make sense to tell anyone 'You Are God' because they are literally just an NPC/a puppet of my consciousness as God. The only conscious being/player in existence is my perspective. Interesting!

Key insight: too much truth can hamper your growth into the embodiment of truth. Too much truth can literlly be traumatizing. Mothering, protection and nurturing in the form of a cocoon is necessary. This is not only true for raising children but it's true for all of life. Everything only works in exact appropriation. Sensitivity and resposivness is wisdom. I read Leo's blog post on masculinity valuing truth more. There are valid points. That being said, I would like to add to the perspective and balance it out a bit: As Leo described both the traits of woman and man can be interpreted as survival. Both the raw survival strategies of men to be effective and the social survival of woman to be loving, etc. but there is another side of this coin: truth. As Leo described, there is also an aspect of truth in effectiveness of men in business, war, leadership, etc. BUT so there is ALSO truth in the effectiveness of woman in raising children, mothering, nurturing, etc. in fact, you could say it's a deeper, even more intelligent and subtle truth because it requires subtle appropriateness, empathy, and compassion. This kind of truth/love of course not only applies to raising children but it applies to all relationships and your whole approach to life. It's the intelligence and understanding that truth is relative. Blinding or overwhelming your children with your truth is NOT appropriate and in a greater sense, truthful. It's truth in a holistic context. Consider this: it's more truthful and intelligent to offer just the right amount of truth to someone is ready for rather than blasting truth in their face to the point at which they counter-react, shut off, close down, or drown. It's like gardening, will you shower a flower until it drowns or shine light so hard on it that it burns or will you offer just the right amount so it can flourish? Both forms of truth are necessary. I would claim: Neither is superior. The real intelligence is in knowing and balancing both.

Very different perspective to what I’m used to. I’ve seen a few people here and there, people with a lot of experiance in new age spirituality, psychedelics, eastern philosophy, etc. realize it’s twisted or unfulfilling and turn to Christianity / Jesus as a more pure spirituality (the first guy is responsible for making Dr Joe Dispenza famous and has been deep into the whole industry for 13 years). I’m taking this seriously because it is so opposed to my epistemic convictions. Even if it’s not true, such an opposed perspective can shine light on my shadows/blind spots as it looks at me from ‘the opposite side’. What do you think? Without dismissing it, genuinely consider, could it be true that Jesus is legit and a truer path through this 3 dimensional reality? Then once you’ve genuinely considered this, from an as unbiased perspective as possible, what deeper dynamics do you see at play here?

I know. When is your course about that coming? I guess it’s going to drop when I as the Godhead decides it’s time for this incarnation to return to the singularity 😂 On my recent LSD trip I was pretty sure I as the Godhead made you up to awaken myself from the dream and eventually fully realize myself. I have the suspicion that I might end up leaving this body one day in good part because of your teachings! Your teachings are dangerous to my ego, Leo. Like a gun aiming at me behind the curtain. One teaching & trip too much and the curtain opens. But as the curtain opens, I realize, it was never you, it was always just myself. The ultimate God kill-switch

Interesting! Appreciate the insight. I always assumed that truth leads to love and love leads to truth but they must be taken to their ultimate conclusion/point/full circle. I see merit in your point because the ego may just be too tenacious to simply dissolve in love. It’s like truth is the spine that’s upholding the heart. That being said, I see how love (many times) shortcuts the process of spinning our wheels with truth inquiry. For example: when all is said and done, we eventually arrive here and love our experience as it is and through this complete acceptance/love, there’s a deeper truth revealed which cannot be aimed at but only arrived at (when all effort is surrendered). So truth is SEEING where the ego hides behind love and love is FEELING when the ego hijacks truth or keeps on restlessly seeking, while subconsciously avoiding the pain of surrender. Eventually, truth and love must be in perfect balance or one fully integrated whole - otherwise they are incomplete.

That makes sense. The question is, what method are you using to discover truth? Could it be that the truth is in devotion rather than realization? And are you purely trying to understand it through the mind or also through the heart and gut? What would happen if you surrendered all you know and entered into full devotion towards Love until there is no more object of Love but only Love. Could this pure devotion be a transforming / heart opening factor in daily life no matter what you devote yourself to? And could it be that if devoted to Jesus, his spirit aids in that heart opening process?

Love that meme Let me play the devils advocate here: you mention a lot that the Devil sneaks in and corrupts/inverts the holiest. Consider that Christians reject 5-MeO “I am God” experiences as spiritual deception, no matter how clear, loving or light-filled. They explain it as either demonic, egoic projection, or metaphysically confused. The experience may be real, but the interpretation (that you are God) is, in their eyes, the original sin repeated. There is God in you and you can basically have temporary union but you are not the whole of God. That’s what satan tried, rebellion against the submission to God and wanting to be God by themselves. Even the holiest saints are still creatures, not the Creator. So what if Jesus is literally God? Not merely an enlightened human or even something like an Avatar, but the one and only God incarnated in flesh. If true, could it be that psychedelic insight is the highest deception of the devil? And what would that explain his impact on 2000+ years of history? In theory it justifies their worshipping but is it true in practice? I guess the only way to find out would be to become a wholeheartedly devout Christian and see if God fills our heart with more pure Love and Peace than we have ever experienced. However, that would require the type of self sacrifice Jesus talks about and most aren’t willing to undergo. Who are we going to trust, our own egos judgement or submitting ourselves in devotion to Jesus in faith? It’s a tricky conundrum. Steaks are high! 🥩

Also interesting point! Do you mind sharing examples of how religion offers this depth of stability?

I’m curious to hear more if you’d like to share!

Interesting! Appreciate you watching those videos. I watched a few more videos from the guy and he said he had a genuine Kundalini awakening. Would that count as self discovery? I will say though that if he couldn’t find the genuineness in new age, then he definitely wasn’t serious enough or lucky enough to find a guide who can lead him deep enough. I agree that they are not being super rigorous in their questioning and epistemology. That being said, the guy makes some points worth considering. Here he talks about one of the worlds most famous satanist basically saying that new age originated out of satanism (minute 28). He also makes the greater point that the essential difference between new age and following Jesus is that new age is a rebellion against God just like the devil is a rebellion/the first sin because it wants to be God by themselves rather than serving Him. Not oneness with God but service. He says new ages want to be God, whereas following Jesus means submitting oneself to God & becoming Godlike but not God Himself. I myself had a recent experiance of waking up as God/consciousness but I still find this interesting to consider as there is room for conclusions and deceptions to sneak in. Could he be right and aiming to realizes oneself as God is satanic? Almost true but just twisted enough to not be the truth? I can see all the arguments for oneness with God, and that’s all I’ve been perusing for the last 5+ years but still, very interesting to genuinely consider this: Here he talks about kundalini: