Michal__

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Posts posted by Michal__

  3. Posted

    This might make some mods screech (especially if they're not familiar with some of the ways spiritual development can go), but you should do a meditation retreat (minimum 10 days, 10+h a day, preferably longer). It's likely you'd get an Eckhart Tolle style instant alleviation of 90% suffering that would stay there even after you are not on the retreat.

    If that doesn't happen then yeah, I'd get the antidepressants and continue practicing.

    But you should be able to assess whether you can handle the fact, that at least some parts of the retreat would be destabilizing.

    Dark night is a lot more common than people think. A dead giveaway should be if you first started with very positive experiences, maybe completely spontaneous (doesn't matter if it's spontaneous, it would just make it more obvious).

  4. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    41 minutes ago, OBEler said:

    @Girzo if it would be an authentic breakdown it would look less extreme. 

    I know how a real mental breakdown looks like

    He is total exaggerating. Simulating (quiet good sometimes) a crazy mental ill man. 

    Trolling to this degree is still a mental illness, at least in my view.

    Just a less severe form.

    It definitely did not grow his channel, so it was not a business decision. At least not a good one.

    He can't be completely sane and consider eating shit a good marketing strategy simultaneously

  6. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    9 hours ago, Vlad_ said:

    Guys, have you ever practiced witchcraft? How was your experience? What kind of a book would you recommend to read for a complete beginner?

    If you have 0 experience please do not bother to respond, thank you! 

    Read advanced magick for beginners by Alan Chapman and start practicing right away.

    I have literally thousands of experiences with witchcraft and I consider this to be one of the best starting points. Another great thing would be to combine it with a fire kasina retreat.

    And the most accurate movie is "The Craft" (the old version). Yeah, some parts are exaggerated but not by much.

     

    Screenshot_20230417-113626.png

  7. Posted

    13 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

    If you do a lot of meditation -- which is basically what you are describing -- that will shift your state of consciousness. Until eventually you start to reach egoless states. And perhaps eventually the total falling away of the ego state.

    Since meditation is gradual, your state can shift subtly over the years without you even noticing how much it is changing. But you can also have dramatic leaps.

    The best way to understand what ego is, is to enter a state where it simply doesn't exist. A state in which you cannot even recall your birth or your name.

    To understand ego you need a stark contrast between ego-state and non-ego-state. Which is why psychedelics are so useful. When a psychedelic erases your own name from your mind, then you really start to appreciate ego. You may even beg GOD to give it back.

    That is a good tip and I haven´t done that yet.

    How do you specifically use contemplation to shift the trip in that direction on any substance? Or is it necessary to use something like ketamine?

     

  9. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

    "Ego" is not merely thoughts and beliefs, it is a state of consciousness.

    So egolessness is a different state of consciousness than the state of consciousness where you completely observe thoughts, beliefs and emotions which is a loop that removes resistance to experience?

    Which can directly result in a state with zero body, for example.

  10. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    11 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

    This whole notion of "having an ego" is just an imaginary construct. The sooner you drop the whole idea, the better.

    There really aren't any egos, just ideas in the Mind.

    It's possible to have thought structures that often repeat & result in repetitive behavior and realizing that they are impermanent etc by observing them causes a change in perspective than often causes a change in behavior.

    Fully seeing all thoughts and emotions can free a lot of energy and result in better ideas.

    It is also possible to use thoughts for construction of stuff. But that is a separate woo woo sounding topic. Which actually can look manifold deeper than all those loa people.

    Anyway I am just sharing (a part of) my current perspective, there surely must be a lot more to it.

  12. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    Enlightement, in the normal sense of the word, does not gurantee a high level of personal development.

    Some of them were even warlords. SD Red.

    All of the classic religions are sexually repressed. SD Blue. And they can lead to some deep realizations.

    Basically, you can be an underdeveloped monkey even if you are blissed out 24/7 and have a permanent no self realization.

  13. Posted

    On 7. 4. 2023 at 3:23 PM, BipolarGrowth said:

    My initial thoughts are that it would be more fulfilling, but I’m also not that tied to that specific major. I could always simply look for a different line of work and try to improve my finances instead of going back to school. The issue with that is I imagine my situation wouldn’t change that much overall. My intention if school does feel like a good fit is to go for deeper study into Buddhism or philosophy of some sort. This is essentially meant to be an attainable and moderate or low risk way of exploring a different life path and mode of living than the typical work grind. Whatever gets me to that is what would be best. I’m not too keen on trying something like starting an online business as I tend to do best when I have a strong sense of obligation to complete something. I’ve tried that sort of thing multiple times, and it has always correlated with more manic episodes and in turn more hospital bills that cost tens of thousands of dollars. 
     

    College actually is not as good as working  in respect to how much obligation is felt, but it still has more of a structure and built-in sense of obligation than doing a business entirely on my own. One reason my real estate business has gone well is because I have an obligation to my partner. I never really have that when it’s a project I’m working on alone. It’s too easy for me to change course to some new project or burn myself out before things actually start working for me. This is certainly something for me to work on, but I’m looking for a somewhat reliable way to try a different life path right now that won’t necessarily be what I end up doing forever or is some dream situation. This is ultimately a sort of interim step I want to try out. 
     

    I would like to point out to anyone giving suggestions that I am susceptible to rather severe manic episodes when I try to accomplish too much at once. This has been a recurring theme for me. This current plan allows me to stay a bit closer to a support network of family in case anything goes south and not put myself in a situation where I might have to work too much for my current mental stability. The fact that it is in-state tuition and a reasonable cost of living are key factors in my decision making process for this plan because of my added risk of instability. Ideally, any alternative paths would not have a larger hours/week time requirement than what I’ve initially thought up here. 

    Another thought - I got around not feeling a sense of obligation because my current main client gives me daily deadlines (copywriting). And also - it is important to make sure that I am not taking an order that is more complicated than my current skill level (eg, - doing a lot of complicated modifications to an existing website is much harder than building a website from scratch).

    So if you can think of a way to do something like that it would be ideal.

    Idk if it is helpful in your situation, but maybe another thing to think about.

  14. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    The main issue I see with that is - are you really sure that weekly homework from religious studies (which probably won't do much for your spiritual life) and cramming for exams regarding memorized Buddhist stuff will be more fulfilling than working on your finances/business/maybe starting a second small business?

    I get the appeal of having a chill time where you mainly study. Especially if it's somewhat related to spirituality. 

    Just something to consider.

    I went to University 2 years ago because I thought it would be much more chill than working on my business and now I'm considering quitting. But I definitely learned some useful stuff on the other hand.

    I'd love to do a year long concentration retreat instead of university, that would be much better. Except that requires being able to not work on business at all etc.

  17. Posted

    5 hours ago, Magnanimous said:

    One idea I have is applying as much of the book as I can at one period of time so I can let it assimilate into my brain through action, then memorize another section through that process. Along with your answers, what do you think of that strategy.

    I would expand on that and say that you could spend 50% of your reading time doing the excercises from the specific book and only read further when you finished the tasks on the current page.

    You could use the remaining 50% to read another book so you dont feel like you are reading this one too long.

    If you read for an hour a day you might want to bump it up to 90 minutes, so you spend 45m on each. 

    Treat the book like a course instead of your usual reading time.

  18. Posted

    Maintaining perfect posture and very little movement (maybe a stretch or a walk every 1.5h) is very important for getting as much out of it as possible.

    Distinguish between movement from restlesness (and do not move) and only consider moving if you are becoming lethargic. If you become lethargic, 5 minutes of walking meditation could be very beneficial.

    If you do it this way the periods where wakefulness is becoming very deep with zero lethargy should become longer everyday. Even if you mostly meditate less.

  19. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    1/6 HHC cookie + 1.5h high quality meditation + listening to Eckhart Tolle as a peripheral object = It feels like I am almost 1:1 to his consciousness. I suspect I am in for a pretty big shift this week. 

    Using a peripheral object and not just the main object is perfect for understanding what mindfulness actually is. One pointedness alone is not enough. Upper jhanas are the whole field of experience.

    Do not underestimate how much energy you can free up by letting go of the tons of neurotic thought you probably have!

    Interesting experience: It is often said that weed supresses dreams, but when I did a working to have even more astral projections than normally it worked very well even though weed did reduce my dreams dramatically the week before and I definitely should not have had this much REM.

    Also I have experienced 4th screen kasina twice in the past two days! While only meditating 1 - 2 hours a day. Weed does make kasina way more effective because it creates micro visuals, increases your concentration and makes it easier to enter jhana.

    So it might be soon possible to stay in high magick teritorry year round.

    ssBez názvu.png

  20. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    10 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

    I know people get a lot of value out of Tolle's work. I got no issue with that. If he helps you feel better, good. Learn from whoever you can.

    The good thing about realizing Tolle's  insights is that it is possible to walk around in it close to 24/7. Freedom from most negative states of mind is no small thing.

    It's possible to lock it in with microdosing very quickly.

    And it doesn't distract from deeper psychedelic explorations.

  21. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    It might theoretically be that understanding never disappears, it just won't be fully experienced in a lower state of consciousness.

    I've been experiencing fractals/slightly psychedelic states during dreams (or you can call it between dreams) and I've never even had a trip with fractals.

    I can for example take a microdose, question stuff, which will turn the microdose to a small trip and then days and weeks after when I question stuff sober I get to keep some of the experiences from that.

  23. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    So, I was quite impatient and decided to do my LSA trip yesterday and did not do a proper extraction. I did get good results but yeah, the nausea definitely hindered me from fully maximizing the benefits of the trip.

    - At one point (when I was waiting to puke in the bathroom) it hit me that this room is a singular thing not inside my concepts. Before then I thought that "yeah, this might be the case blahblahblah" but now when it hit my in this specific state of consciousness it is like "holy shit! What Leo says is completely literal! Nothing metaphorical about it all!" Realizing this can very deeply affect how you physically see what you see (the floating room is deepening understanding the floating room).

    - Another thing: the perception of other things outside my experience is very deeply lodged inside the mind, so when it hit my I did see that my deep assumptions about reality are not correct! In fact, I think that if I went deeper (read: if the nausea did not hinder me like this) it would have very quickly become too intense!  It did have a "not ready for this" aspect to it (wondering what will happen if I get past the "not ready" concept)

    - My "There is only this" seems like a shallower version of "I am God" (which I have not experienced yet). So no, I did not have a God realization but it was definitely in that direction and if I planned my trip a bit better, I definitely might have realized God. I did also experience something slightly deeper than there being only this room, but that is not something I can articulate yet (or comprehend fully for that matter)

    - Be careful, if you are very sensitive to weed (like me) then even 5 mg edible can have an uncomfortable body load (yes, I can distinguish between LSA body load and HHC body load).

    I also fell asleep a lot sooner than I should have (I woke up 6 hours later still tripping). But I know that my next session will be epic. And I will definitely extract it next time.

    I had to pause watching Leos guided God meditation several times, because it was getting too intense at certain points :D

    It also improved my habits (at least for now). Being in a high state of consciousness while puking due to poor planning does that to you 9_9

    During my next trip I will contemplate "how does it work that this thing is me".

  24. Posted

    17 hours ago, Wolfgang Winterkaise said:

    + Mon-Fri, Resistance-Bands adjusting between 50-140 lbs, 6 upper body exercises 30 reps each 
    + Full body calisthenics workout (hits every muscle): push ups, pull ups, plank, side plank, single leg bridge, squats, lunges & burpees
    + daily walking
    + lean balanced diet, mostly organic vegetables

    My goal is Bruce Lee's strong and functional physique 

    bruce%20lee%204.jpg?itok=phf7KkUM

     

    That will definitely work as long as you are adding resistance/rep/more difficult timing/more difficult variations.

  25. Posted · Edited by Michal__

    1/4 HHC / weed cookie:

    Experiencing and deepening panaromic vision / the bubble of consciousness / stepping outside the sense of sight and other senses.

    Also got closer to completely letting go which is a great way to intensify the trip!

    Also I'm starting to ask some epic questions which are putting me to some great states, I might edit this later today once more progress is made.

    Also it 10x receiving transmissions (even of those who are not deliberately giving transmissions - I can get a look at any video/book/etc and experience things they experienced).

    But asking good questions is still superior to any transmission.

    Interesting thing that is happening with my trips lately: asking good questions both while tripping and while sober mean that you will transfer more and more of your higher states into your sober life!