DreamScape

So it has been about a year and more that I have REALLY REALLY wanted to work a lot, and I have a huge drive. This is something that I REALLY want to do. Somehow though, whenever I sat down to try to do work, I just felt so much internal resistance, I felt myself feeling lethargic and tired all of the time, and also laying down a lot. I though that this was due to spiritual purification, but hahahah, no it ain't. It finally hit me today WHY THE FUCK I couldn't do anything, and that's because my whole entire family is lazy as fuck and pretty much lays down all day, for example my dad pretty much plays video games most of the time, doesn't have a job, and it's the same story for everyone in the house except for the fact that others go to work. I was picking up all of those energies. Now that I'm working at the library, I literally feel driven and enthusiastic and I'm doing my communications midterm with no internal resistance now. For the first time in a while. So a tip for empaths/highly-sensitive individuals --> find a place that you can work where your environment supports you. you will be grateful for that choice. Although, I'm also sure that this advice can be helpful for anyone.

Honestly this is what really started my awakening and cleared my mind, I'm surprised that you haven't awakened this already since I have seen your posts and you seem pretty awake. Ive had so many awakening experiences and I think that is due to kundalini, not my own spiritual practice

[my face]

Just keep doing what you're doing: nothing Maybe if you do that you will become bored with doing nothing, such that you create motivation to do something

One big benefit I know Leo's big on.. philosophy becomes clearer, more open mindedness and less self bias

@fridjonk hahahhh.. i feared that this would be said. @LfcCharlie4 thanks for the detailed answers! I've had moments like you describe where I feel as if I'm in paradise, as I'm sitting in my kitchen ? its lovely.

Moana lol

This is a funny post

Jesus had the messiah complex.

@SoonHei Might as well stay naked. Therefore, you can be 100% truth. LOL

@Average Investor Yeah, it really does. I was with one of my ex girlfriends before, and I was super energetic beforehand and then when I went to go and cuddle her in her house my energy completely depleted within like a second. It was insane.

Beautiful ❤

Wow.. That's insane. Never heard a person's story more interesting than THAT.

My mother and I have had a pretty rough relationship. We never really got along. For almost the longest I can remember, I didn't want to be with her. She is emotionally abusive, manipulative and just overall a very toxic person to be around. I stopped seeing her when I was a little over 16 years old. I turn 18 tomorrow. So now I can legally be away from her for good. I was just about to block her. I really want to. I don't see the relationship going anywhere for a while. Although something stopped me, which was second guesses. What if I decide I want to talk to her later on down the line? What if she wants to say happy bday to me tomorrow? This is me longing for the love, in which I was originally closed off but due to spiritual work am now more open to love. idk y'all. This is harder than I thought. What would be an appropriate response to this situation?

hahah, that's fucked up. Yeah, I agree with you.

No I don't think it matters. It's been a while that I've thought about this so just bear in mind if I'm wrong or something. I've never done PUA or stuff. But it seems like its about foreplay and how good you are at the act itself. It's more about the other things that really turns the girl on and not the banging. Also romance, I'm sure creative ideas to do during it would be great also as it's not a cookie cutter, copy and paste thing she has ever seen I'm sure that if you have a very small dick then I'm sure that will have a bad effect on your sex, but otherwise it's about the other things you do At least that's what I know with my limited knowledge

@Vladz0r yeah, we relate well. Luckily, I'm living with my father and hes like my safe haven you could say. I had to go through two years of arguments and fights and being grounded and ignored to get to that point though. My mom isnt violent, although I feel like it wouldnt have even gone as smooth as it did if I didnt have counselors in my life. It never really seemed like she cared about me at all. I know that all women aren't like that, but so so many people are neurotic and dysfunctional it's literally insane. Oh by the way, you're right, the relationship between my dad and her is suuuuuper bad @Martin123 I understand. I felt like the best thing to do was to wait until I was deeply healed and I could go in full throttle and be okay with whatever happens. So yeah, go with the flow with whatever happens, great advice! @Fortunate Son she hasn't texted me for a while so there aren't any recent examples. When she was, she wasnt giving me the space I needed away. She would constantly text me and expect me to fulfill her needs. I didnt though, and One time she was just super upset and she threatened to tell them that I wasnt living with her anymore and my smoking weed that I did a year or so prior. (I told the guidance counselors the WHOLE story though, so I was safe and okay). One time I had a phone, while being grounded of course, after dark (1030) and she took the phone, and since it was my dads phone (that I took without his permission) she slammed it multiple times and screamed very loud. That made me feel pretty worthless, shameful and dreadful that I even had her as a mom. Also things like telling my autistic stepbrother that the reason why he has autism is because my grandma (dads side) dropped him while he was a baby. She has also made me hate my stepmom before by accusing her in front of me. This is her. I closed myself off so deeply because Id get love from her and none the next day. I always felt empty. Plus, I was always comparing it to my dads which was lax, I had more freedom and love was available more readily than it was for her house.

@Son of leo shooting myself to "be a man" is not why I'm on the planet lol

@Martin123 very beautiful perspective. I notice that with myself, I am still attracted to that comfort zone. If I talked to her, I know we would just go into unconscious patterns again. i dont want that to happen, I want the cycle of abuse and trauma to end. Even now I'm saying "I feel bad, maybe I shouldnt have blocked her." "What if she texted me and I dont reply, how would she feel." But I know I would feel worse if she texted me. I feel like I'm avoiding a very huge trap. @Anna1 I wouldnt say its messed up, love is what keeps us together, whether or not it hurts us or not. If I wasnt so closed off originally to her, I wouldve done the same thing.

@Anna1 yeah, I feel you.

@Leo GuraDamn really? That's interesting.

@Anna1 if I ever do, i will remember. The biggest problem with trauma is not the event itself, I think the aftereffects. Like a nuke that only hits one small segment, but then blows up a big cloud and destroys miles and miles around it, that is trauma. Then it takes a while for recovery. It's too bad that it is this way I think. Even though 'everything is as is meant to be.'

@Anna1 I am so sorry to hear that! It definitely is. Glad you have your peace.

It is said that god has a curious desire to know himself. Since reality is infinite, in many directions at once, is it really possible for god to ever fully know himself?

Theres no other way it could be. Im okay with it though. This is one of the best things you can ever do, imo.