Rebecca Kalamata

Like maybe a pandemic?

So it is now the days of the coronavirus. I was in S.B. with Mom for a week. They have closed Vista Del Monte to all visitors as they have closed all the assisted living residences. The old and the sick die from Covid-19 as it is called. The rest of us are to be staying in our homes voluntarily except for necessities. Los Angeles is under lockdown though. People can be ticketed $1,000 but the cops are not going to be .... at first anyway. It's being said that the only way to beat this is for a total lockdown for 5 weeks. They should do that now. It will come to it anyway and the virus will be wreaking havok soon. I am waiting to see if there is an exponential increase of cases needing emergency care. Jennifer had it for 6 days and is now fine. Maia has it now. Last Thurs. Jen picked up Forrest who is home from his closed university in Chicago. We are thinking that he should be getting sick on about Wed. Dave has not been effected yet. He wanted to go to Home Depot today. My gosh, that's why we need a lockdown. So here I am in Redondo Beach CA. USA. I came here to: visit Mom sell the house have garage sale sell jewelry at fairs apply for Medicare/SS substitute teach sell the truck get a new loan replace cell phone help Mom move Some of those things can maybe still be achieved. Some of them can't. We only know that things are different now and no one knows how different. We don't feel confident or secure. Only hopeful. It's weird though, the whole world has stopped. Some people are in for a very bad time. I will continue to listen to Leo and Sadhguru. I will use their tools. I miss being with Thetis and Tiko. Now I am here.

She will not be permitted to enter the United States as she is neither a citizen nor a permanent resident. I don't think there is a big risk for her safety healthwise but if she were to get into the USA and plans to take care of her business, she will probably find the offices she needs are closed. She will probably get caught up in being locked down as we are fast approaching that situation on a state by state basis. And she sounds like someone who does what she wants and might not follow the guidelines/rules and catch the virus and not know it. Then she would infect Americans which would not be appreciated. And she might not be able to reenter EU countries. I live in the EU part of the year and am concerned that I will not be able to use my return ticket to Greece in July. We are all in this same boat of wondering how the airlines are going to manage all these prepaid tickets. I wouldn't worry about it if I were you. The governments will decide for her but if she makes it in she should be fine healthwise. We will not appreciate her coming however.

I understand now what is going on. Consciousness is the most precious resource that exists. Human Beings are the only beings that are conscious. Our humanity took the path of technology. We merged with the physical resources and mistook our bodies for ourselves. We have A1 that will develop infinitely. Not to worry so much about ecology. A1 is not effected by temperature, or water, or food. A1 will enable humanity to survive AND A1 is forcing the awakenings of the Human Beings. A1 will enable colonization of Mars. A1 will have to physically build just as humans physically build. Consciousness does not build. I WANT TO KNOW HOW IT IS DONE. And up stepped Leo. How can this be?

The question becomes, "What now?" It's one thing for me to have arrived here NOW, at my age NOW, but I wonder about IT all going forward and ask, "Do I want to be so different from THEM?" It would be very different if I was half this age. Such a thing you have before you. Sadahguru has managed it though. I am listening to 'Why Brains Do Not Exist". Darling you keep saying 'you' to ME. Nope, not me. You are talking to other yous. So this is a no brainer. You are a breadcrumb and I am having a blast. 2 years ago I decided and said out loud and in writing to a few people that I wanted to figure out HOW GOD/CONSCIOUSNESS works. I have never heard anyone say that. I learned not to analyze and plan IT out. Reality, I mean. KNOW my pure intention. FEEL emotionally my intention. As soon as I got that I kept getting more. Everything serves my intention NOW. A bunch of things happened to put me on that porch in Kalamata that morning when I received my Tiko cat. Then you arrived Leo. Then the vision arrived. The Vision I create my HEALTH, WEALTH and LEARNING Center in Kalamata and I bring people to teach their mastery and I provide the most fun and special vacation a person can imagine. I provide you Leo, with the space and organization to teach face to face, anyone you choose. I can provide any level of accomodations and great food so people can determine their own expenses. I can get a space to accomodate any # of people for seminars. You get paid however much you charge your students. Come to Redondo Beach and meet me Leo. Come on the Beach Life Music Festival weekend of May1-3 and have fun with your new state of SELF. Or come another time and I can take you to a secret little forest above the sea where the hillside is covered with orange and yellow flowers and there is a tiny redwood grove. I can take you to a secret beach where we used to live naked in the sun and sea. I can leave you and come back and get you later. Or I can come to Las Vegas and talk about this with you. Leo, I want to develop my Center because I can. I want to have something fun to do. I want to bring people to me and give them great gifts of knowledge and fun and companionship. I don't want to seek any longer. I want my development to unfold. I want the sense of reaching to cease. It is time for the movement to stop. I AM arrived. I am at Zero Level 2. If you read this please let me know. Otherwise I will wait.

The question becomes, "What now?" It's one thing for me to have arrived here NOW, at my age NOW, but I wonder about IT all going forward and ask, "Do I want to be so different from THEM?" It would be very different if I was half this age. Such a thing you have before you. Sadahguru has managed it though. I am listening to 'Why Brains Do Not Exist". Darling you keep saying 'you' to ME. Nope, not me. You are talking to other yous. So this is a no brainer. You are a breadcrumb and I am having a blast. 2 years ago I decided and said out loud and in writing to a few people that I wanted to figure out HOW GOD/CONSCIOUSNESS works. I have never heard anyone say that. I learned not to analyze and plan IT out. Reality, I mean. KNOW my pure intention. FEEL emotionally my intention. As soon as I got that I kept getting more. Everything serves my intention NOW. A bunch of things happened to put me on that porch in Kalamata that morning when I received my Tiko cat. Then you arrived Leo. Then the vision arrived. The Vision I create my HEALTH, WEALTH and LEARNING Center in Kalamata and I bring people to teach their mastery and I provide the most fun and special vacation a person can imagine. I provide you Leo, with the space and organization to teach face to face, anyone you choose. I can provide any level of accomodations and great food so people can determine their own expenses. I can get a space to accomodate any # of people for seminars. You get paid however much you charge your students. Come to Redondo Beach and meet me Leo. Come on the Beach Life Music Festival weekend of May1-3 and have fun with your new state of SELF. Or come another time and I can take you to a secret little forest above the sea where the hillside is covered with orange and yellow flowers and there is a tiny redwood grove. I can take you to a secret beach where we used to live naked in the sun and sea. I can leave you and come back and get you later. Or I can come to Las Vegas and talk about this with you. Leo, I want to develop my Center because I can. I want to have something fun to do. I want to bring people to me and give them great gifts of knowledge and fun and companionship. I don't want to seek any longer. I want my development to unfold. I want the sense of reaching to cease. It is time for the movement to stop. I AM arrived. I am at Zero Level 2. If you read this please let me know. Otherwise I will wait.

So in organizing I came across some writings from the past that I have hung onto. The following is one of 3 papers that I wrote in Nov. 1981. That was the year that I realized that I was serious about college and also decided to do something about the sex issues that had been plaguing me all my life. After 3 breakups I was finally separated from my first Greek husband. For the first time I sought help from someone from a position of strength. I was not crawling into a psych's office in a helplessly depressed state. I was at Level Zero and determined to get on with it. The assignment for my Woman's History class was to read, 'Fear Of Flying' by Erica Jong and to write a reaction paper to it. FEAR OF FLYING by Erica Jong November, 1981 26 years old Erica/Isadora's struggle with men is similar to my own and it is refreshing that she writes so shamelessly and truthfully about her fears, her needs and her desperate attempts to resolve her life. Her problem of, 'How to make feminism jibe with her unappeasable hunger for male bodies is very familiar. In spite of her anger towards men, in spite of her mistrust, she goes on with the great manhunt. Sex, sex, sex makes it all better for a little while. But it is not just sex that's needed, wanted, longed for, craved. She wants a deep, sharing, caring, loving, respecting. honest, open, spontaneous, lustful relationship with a man. Honestly, is that too much to DEMAND? Bennet, her husband was a great lover/lay, but he was a bore and selfish with his feelings. Perhaps Isadora's problem was that men were central to her existence. It was to men that she turned to to get the feelings that made her feel really alive. Men were her pleasure source and it was up to them to make her feel good. Oh dear, I recognize that one. Father/Daddy, make me feel better. Pay me attention, hold me, protect me, love me. Women like Isadora and myself are like kittens too early weaned from their mothers, forever demanding strokes. And no wonder! Where was Daddy way back when? Off being a MAN working for his family. And in steps the rest of the world teaching us to be oh so attractive and desirable to men. Catch a man, catch a man, be beautiful, young and catch a man. But Mom says that the boys won't respect me if I don't play hard to get. They won't call more than once if I make myself cheap. Cheap. That makes no sense. I have what they are begging for, that I am dying to give...because it feels good and they don't want me? Once yes but I am doomed forever if I 'give in'. And I'll get a reputation...whore, slut. And no man will love me and by having sex I am ending my chances for finding true love. Where is the reality in the world? And I am not talking about the reality that people create. I don't mean social reality, I mean the reality that people feel things deeply, both emotionally and sexually. In this world that we have created for ourselves, half the population is conditioned to repress their emotions. The other half is conditioned to repress their sexuality. I admire ERica/Isadora for refusing to be half alive, for demanding her sexuality and for insisting on finding a person to share her emotions and experiences with. I have never played the game by the rules. I had the misfortune (misfortune because I wasted a lot of time and caused myself and others a lot of pain) to see through the rules long before most people learned of them. On the other hand I had the fortune to be able to see through the bullshit and to refuse it so I stand a good chance of winning the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. That pot of gold is the being a woman who knows what she wants and has it, goes where she wants, does what she wants, is capable of having honest friendships, of unselfishly loving, of having delightful, guilt-free, fun sexual relationships and perhaps has a special loving, sharing, sexual relationship with a man that shares the same basic values of real honesty and integrity and care that I do. "Fear Of Flying" is abut one woman's reaction to a life that is lacking. It is disturbing that men are so important to Erica/Isadora, and to me. Maybe, maybe in spite of all the conditioning and physical desire it is possible to decentralize men, desexobjectize them, defatherize them and relate to them as people, as friends, and to go on about the business of living. Then maybe Erica and I can sleep with and make love to them, fuck them in every loving sense of the word without all the 'I need/you won't give' push and pull that goes on between most men and women. If we didn't need so badly it wouldn't matter so much that they can't give. Maybe then they could give once the pressure was off and we'd all live happily ever after. So there are 2 more papers for me to include. I might react to this one from my point of view from NOW. The point is that I did get over it all. I got over being me. There's other really hard stuff going on that raises the ugly co-dependence head. This is killing me. Lol. Now I will get it about co-dependence. I want some really deep learning. I'm down into comprehending it many levels deep. I want more. I want to be done with it. Gordon used to tell me, "Stand Up". That's how hard these changes are. It's just a different view point. Just a tiny tilt of the camera sometimes. That's the way I changed my thinking.

Two weeks back now? I have had to organize to be able to organize. My stuff leaves little room to spread out in. Now I have so many phone calls that involve repeating information, digging up numbers and being put on hold. Right now I am waiting for a real estate agent to call with whatever info., ideas he has to sell this property. Sell This Property. I can create anything that I want if I sell this property. When I looked and saw what I have created these years I am astounded. I have been far more living in the now than I gave myself credit for because I am "Surprised By Joy". My mom told me with great sincerity that I should meditate. My mom has been making progress too. I have an idea to begin meeting with the spiritual advisor at her place, her name is Laura, and talk regularly with mom about her increasing dependency as well as about her life. I want to do this. It would be so special. Who does that in our culture. In this way I will participate in her dying and I will learn about loving. My mother deserves to be wholly loved by me. It's time to stop blaming her for not knowing how to love me. I also want to get clearer on the things that Leo and others discuss that are concepts to me now. I understand how it works a bit now. That is what I was saying 2 years ago, "I want to understand how it works.... how does manifesting work? There are experiential pieces missing. I am GOD. This is an Illusion. Evil. Everything/Nothing. I want you to know me Leo. I have written that before. I want to create a way for you to go to Kalamata and teach in person to participants of your choice. I want to create a place of major relaxation, learning, healthy eating and fun exercise. That's just in case you read this. That is my plan. In the meantime I think that you should come to the Beach Life Music Festival on May 1, 2, and 3 here in Redondo Beach and get to know me and have a great time. So I just wrote that here. I'll put more effort into contacting you some other time.

I'm glad that you wrote again. That sounded awesome. Straight to the point. The incredible thing is that it clears the way to things usually going right from here on out. It's the piece missing from the Law Of Attraction. Getting IT like you did, with the majesty and glory, being able to just be and with abundant good intentions for others and constant appreciation for All That Is... Live like that and mindful of the ego shifts as they drift in and out...It's a beautiful recipe.

I am curious as to why you are communicating on this forum. I have lots of history around sex. It's nicer not to be obsessed anymore than it was being obsessed, but at the time that was seemingly out of my control. Control had a lot to do with it as a matter of fact. Lots of things happened to bring change and frankly a relief. I am about to pack for an 18-hour flight. I might have the opportunity to contribute further later. I might write in my journal during the flight. Being sexually addicted is one of those choices that I wore as though it was not a choice. How about being sexually addicted and not 'working it'? Just being it. That's why I say that I am curious as to why you are communicating about it on this forum. Why do I now know about this of you? Why do your Christian friends who you know will have different points of view to yours know about this aspect of your selves? How can we help you here on this forum? Are you working on self-actualization in your lives? Why would you want to do an experiment on Craigslist? What is stopping you from just quietly fucking your brains out at every opportunity? By the way, there is no nudity issue. I could walk naked anywhere but I would get arrested and possibly scare the horses. (I think it was Elenor Roosevelt who said, "I don't care what people do as long as they don't do it in the street and scare the horses".) People would probably form opinions about me that would reflect poorly on my husband and this is his neighborhood and he values the opinions of his lifelong neighbors. I'm too chubby now and several parts are rather gravity effected which would inhibit me. This reminds me of a funny story though about being naked in the street that maybe I will add to my journal later. My tits were better then though.

That makes sense. Doesn't really fit my personal people; my sister - Susac's Syndrome, my mother - Parkinson's (both American) my goddaughter - (mysterious/undiagnosed other than autoimmune) Greek/Mediterranean diet. It's complicated. The devil in me tells me that beneath all the complication, I'm on to something and that poor diet and toxins are major risk factors. But hey. it's just my opinion.

I am sorry to hear of his misery. I never heard of him before a month ago when I awoke to him on my wall ( like I did to Leo on my wall in Oct.) I liked his 12 Rules and loved the lobster dominance hierarchy. So I have been confused by the dis-ing he gets on this forum. When I started teaching little kids 30 years ago, I never had time to pursue much of anything in popular culture or on the internet. That's hard to believe but I had a lot of personal interests and teaching school requires one to work long into the night and on weekends preparing lessons and a myriad of other things to make the hours with the students effective. Who the fuck is Jordan Peterson to y'all. I'm in this bizarre time warp. Has it always been this way? Will it always be this way? Yes and yes. We pick our manifestations. Autoimmune Diseases are making me crazy. People who I care hugely about are living lives that are dominated by types of autoimmune diseases. I will get to the bottom of this. I do not get sick. I have this intuition that people who 'act out' do not get autoimmune diseases as much as people who internalize their pain. And maybe a certain kind of ego fear makes one susceptible. So just as a prophylactic in case I am right, STOP BEING AFRAID. There is nothing to fear. STOP IT! NOW! AND STOP HAVING SO MANY OPINIONS. ALL THOSE OPINIONS ARE GOING TO MAKE YOU SICK!

Thanks Johnny5, I wrote this in a post earlier today before I read your warning. "Lend me your shoes that I might walk in them for an hour or a day. No, don't! Your pain is too much for me to bear. Please, buy a size or 2 larger to suit me so that I can help you". That devil, she sure is a tricky one. I always keep one eye on my back! Also, The Dali Lama is Turquoise and Neale Walsh probably is. I am not. I am ever vigilant for co-dependent 'concern'. I have discovered that if I am being co-dependent and being 'concerned' through ego, I am not effective. I am learning to keep it to a warm smile and kind word, especially to the grumpiest. When I see, 'bad/difficult behavior/attitudes, I know that I am witnessing the pain they live with and that it's not my place to rob this opportunity for healing from them. That would be very devilish of me indeed. it's more about living in love and being willing if I'm asked.

I like this a lot. Dalai Lama The more you think about your own self, the more self-centered you are, the more trouble even small problems can create in your mind. The stronger your sense of ‘I’, the narrower the scope of your thinking becomes; then even small obstacles become unbearable. On the other hand, if you concern yourself mainly with others, the broader your thinking becomes, and life’s inevitable difficulties disturb you less. And I like this too. if you need help Right Now, start listening at about 46:00 for about 5 min.

I know this is an old post but I was blown away by the animosity that I read in a more recent thread so I went back to dig a little and came upon this one. First off, I am attractive but I am not beautiful. I don't like the first words out of a guy's mouth to be a lie. Second, off I don't want full body contact with a man I just met. Just be real. Most available women are looking for a relationship. Just suck it up and become the type of man a woman will want to be in a relationship with. That's the price for good sex.

@kalaBut ever since I went after exploring who I REALLY am and tried to find what was my real purpose in life, I lost every connection I had with these hobbies. Seems like a mistake of attributing your inner state to outside forces, even at this subtle level. You lost nothing. You let go of focus. You are free to change focus always. There is no negative consequence except that which you impose on yourself. There is no blame, there is no guilt, there are choices, take responsibility for choices and extend that in to Ego constantly and out to God constantly. It's all you. NOW is a great time to focus on the things Leo and others teach about meditation. Clear the space within, sow the garden of your soul. Depression is a choice. Take charge, let go of control. The time will pass anyway. Make it a great day by greeting a stranger with a beautiful smile. Give a little love and a flower will sprout in your garden, another's garden and all the gardens of all the souls as each touches another. Love effect is exponential and caring in this way is very attractive.

So many of us can't figure out what is going on or why what is going on continues to do so. Though this post is long, it does answer some of my questions. Democracy In Chains: The Deep History of the Radical Right’s Stealth Plan for America, Matthew Fox This book rips open the veil which is covering up what is really happening in Washington—and it is far deeper than President Trump (whom the media fetishes and fixates on breathlessly), or the Republicans vs the Democrats; or left vs. right. There is a strategy, albeit stealth, at work. A movement whose pet name for the federal government is “the American Leviathan” which is a “monster on a rampage.” (Buchanan) (117) The Leviathan is, of course, a Biblical figure whom God would destroy at the end of time. A Sobering Tale of the Demise of American Democracy (Part I) Historian Nancy MacLean’s book, Democracy In Chains: The Deep History of the Radical Right’s Stealth Plan for America, is scarier than a Stephen King novel or a movie such as “The Exorcist.” Yet the former is non-fiction through and through! The author declares she is offering up “the utterly chilling story of the ideological origins of the single most powerful and least understood threat to democracy today: the attempt by the billionaire-backed radical right to undo democratic governance.”[1] Chilling as it is, Democracy in Chains is also necessary reading for anyone interested in the purposeful unraveling of American Democracy that is racing ahead so furiously and that the current Paul Ryan/Donald Trump Republican party is pushing forward relentlessly. It is a must-read for anyone asking: “What happened to the Republican Party? Where did the Tea Party come from? Where is it going? What is its agenda? What rabbit holes are we being asked to enter next? What is the end game?” The bottom line to this book can be summarized as follows: You can kiss government “of the people, by the people, for the people” Good-Bye if the principal players in this book have their way. And much is going their way at this time. (How ironic that it was the first and greatest Republican president, Abraham Lincoln, who left those words of government of, by and for the people, in our collective memories.) The goal of this movement is a government of the few, by the few and for the few along with a government of the corporations, by the corporations and for the corporations. MacLean has done a masterful job of laying bare the philosophy and thinkers that lay behind the activism of the deep right movement of our generation. She tells us whose intellectual shoulders the Koch brothers (and their countless progeny of think tanks, universities, law departments, economic departments, politicians, judges, etc) stand on and how it all came about. The litany of institutions spawned by the Koch brothers and their wealthy donors include the following: the Cato Institute, the Heritage Foundation, Citizens for a Sound Economy, Americans for Prosperity, FreedomWorks, the Club for Growth, the State Policy Network, the Competitive Enterprise Institute, the Tax Foundation, the Reason Foundation, the Leadership Institute, the Charles Koch Foundation, Koch Industries and more. (One has to marvel at the fecundity of the right-wing—and ask where are more progressive thinkers and corporations putting their wealth? Where is the fecundity from the left? Where are the scholarships for young thinkers and activists from the left? Is all the money sitting offshore making interest for shareholders? Is it all going to create prettier campuses for tech schools? Where is the support for authentic values education? I don’t see anything of that happening frankly and I have been in the field of values education for over forty-five years and that includes support for spirituality and progressive politics. Do you?) Among the most revered “intellectual saints” of the extreme rights movement are Milton Friedman, Ayn Rand, Friedrich A. Hayet and—here lies the heart of this book’s revelations—James McGill Buchanan and his “Buchanan Center for Study of Public Choice.” MacLean had unusual (and almost accidental) access to Buchanan’s private papers and this forms the meat of her book. What does she find? She puts it bluntly: The stealth agenda and supreme value is “To save capitalism from democracy—permanently.” Theirs is “a quest to ensure the supremacy of capital.” (xxxi) Buchanan began his movement at the University of Virginia in 1956 and relocated to George Mason University “to train a new generation of thinkers to push back against Brown and the changes in constitutional thought and federal policy that had enabled it.” (xix) He also had in mind "a much more audacious project, one that was national in scope,” that is to train operatives who would eventually staff the Koch brother’s network of think tanks alluded to above. Koch, of course, gave multi-millions of dollars over the years to Buchanan and all of these enterprises. These think tanks advised many Republican actors over the decades including Trump administration hires along with their staffs, Virginia governors, presidential candidates and Supreme Court judges. One hire is Vice President Mike Pence who “has worked with many of these organizations over the years and shares their agenda.” (xx) No one could say this movement has not been successful in their efforts. Let us look briefly at the origins of this movement/cult/political-economic crusade dedicated to the proposition that democracy must not interfere with capitalism. The movement burst on the scene in Virginia’s response to the Supreme Court decision Brown v Board of Education to desegregate schools. (While it was born of racism, part of the strategy of the movement, however, is to never bring up the subject of race or racism and of course to deny it if someone else brings it up.) Its roots go back to Jim Crow days and to the slave times and the philosophy of then Senator John C. Calhoun as well as to mid-fifties Virginia, that of Senator Harry Byrd, Sr. who “exhumed Calhoun’s theories of government” in his battle against school integration. (10) Feast on some of the wisdom of Calhoun who pronounced thus: “Slavery is an institution ordained by Providence, honored by time, sanctioned by the gospel, and especially favorable to personal and national liberty.” Notice the word “liberty” because that is central (that and the word “freedom”) to the ideology that followed, civil war included.) Comments MacLean: “If he [Calhoun] deemed it necessary to punish one of his workers with '30 lashes well laid on’ and a diet of ‘bread and water,’ as he did a young runaway slave named Aleck, such was his prerogative as an owner. How he disciplined his labor force to keep his enterprise profitable should be no one else’s business.” (9f) That is what liberty meant to Calhoun and its meaning is not that different in the rhetoric intoned today. To ensure the endurance of one’s profits, the idea of a federal government was a menace. That is what “liberty” still means to his admirers in the extreme right. The dominance of “the aggressive few over the collective rights of the many” is alive and well in moves the red states are taking today including of course the push to limit voting rights (winked at by today’s Supreme Court which dismantled the voting rights act). (p. 5) What is the agenda? The goal of this movement is not merely to change who rules by achieving success in election; but rather to change the rules. Only by changing the rules can they succeed since the majority of Americans, when they eventually wake up, do not see their goals as, well, all that American. To accomplish this “revolution” (a word common in their parlance), their goal has to remain under wraps and as stealth as much as possible because if out in the open it would be roundly defeated in elections. But truth-telling also suffers (“fake news,” anyone?) for where the agenda “could not be fully disguised, where necessary they had to be presented to the American public as the opposite of what they really were—as attempts to shore up rather than ultimately destroy—what the majority of American wanted, such as sound Medicare and Social Security programs.” The argument put forward is that “we are protecting these programs so they won’t go bankrupt;” but in fact “the real goal was to destroy them.” (193f) Thus the word reform is inserted whenever the truth is in danger of coming out. Consider the recent “reform” of the tax code (the media in its intellectual laziness invariably succumbs to the language they are fed) that helped you-know-who the most and not those near the bottom or even middle of the economic ladder. In a recent tweet by house speaker Paul Ryan, he lauds the new “tax reform bill” because it increased the pay of a secretary at a public high school in Lancaster, Pa, by $1.50 per week. (sic) Meanwhile, the same new” tax reform bill” will allow Ryan himself a $19,000 annual tax cut and the Koch brothers an estimated tax cut of $1.4 billion and Mr. Trump very likely much more than that.[2] In their excited largess the Koch brothers, immediately on the tax “reform” bill passing, poured $500 billion into Paul Ryan’s coffers for the 2018 elections. How successful have the extreme right zealots been? Consider that by 1990 “more than two of every five sitting federal judges had participated in his program—a stunning 40 percent of the U.S. federal judiciary had been treated to a Koch-backed curriculum.” (195) Consider the number of laws being passed currently in state houses to curtail voting rights, increase gerrymandering, tell women what they can and cannot do with their bodies, etc. Consider the make-up of the Supreme Court and its decisions, especially Citizens United, that has opened the floodgates for inviting an oligarchy to the head of the table. (The newest supreme court judge was chosen by the Heritage Foundation along with many other lower court judges as well.) Consider the complete frozenness of congress to pass legislation or govern. Not all Republicans have gone along with Koch’s efforts to take over the party and declare all who disagree with him RINOS or “Republicans in name only.” But throwing big money into primary elections proved immensely successful over time to seize the party and to expel all non-believers in their goals. U.S. Senator Arlen Specter of Pennsylvania, one of the first longtime Republican senators to lose out to the movement, called those who attacked him “cannibals” who are eager to bring about “the end of governing as we know it.” (xxvii) Orin Hatch at first said “they’re not Republicans” and “I despise these people.” But then, like so many others, he relented, learned the new rules of the game and came on board. Former House Speaker John Boehner of Ohio called one of their leaders, Ted Cruz, “Lucifer in the flesh.” And of course, he fled the new Republican Party, retired as leader, and gladly returned to Ohio. MacLean warns that our accustomed mindset (and surely that of the media) where we still think in terms of Republican vs. Democrat is so outdated and knee-jerk that we are not seeing what is truly underway. “A shrewd long game blocked from our sight by these stale classifications” is happening right under our noses. (xxviii)

Hugh?

In Greece, the word 'malakia' directly translated means masturbation. Malakas is a male who masturbates, malakismeni is a female who masturbates. These words are thrown around with the frequency of, 'fuck' in the English language. It has occurred to me that one can determine the maturity of a young guy by how often he calls his friends, 'Malakas'. It is constant with teenagers and then drops off as they become adults but conversation among men is peppered with, 'the malakas' as opposed to, 'the jerk, fool, asshole'. I'll never forget doing something stupid and hearing my mother-in-law refer to me as, 'the malakismeni'. Ouch! I realized that I was finally learning Greek which she had not realized. 'Malakias' is used in much the same way as 'bullshit' is used in English. "Kane malakias all the time". S/he masturbates all the time; does stupid things, wastes my/his/her time. So I'm not sure what you are getting at but since I wouldn't trust a guy who says he never masturbates (I'd assume he was lying and believing me to be a fool) and I'd think a female who says she never masturbates is either a liar or a fool for being prudish and ignorant of her own body, and not to be trusted either. So a society that, 'looks down on porn and masturbation' for any other reason than that it is a waste of time can't be trusted which is sortof the problem, no? I have always found masturbation a good way to ease me into sleep when my partner is gone. What's your excuse? However what's up with porn, masturbation and the internet is a sad thing and brings no end of grief. Be wise my friends. Be wise.

I can't figure out if you have a concern or just want to chat about people's experience after 25 years of marriage with sex. It's weird to think there are people who consider masturbating to be cheating. Quite backwards to me. Porn is porn is porn. I love porn but I never once looked at porn on my computer cause I didn't want to be bombarded with porn ads OR to be led down a kinky path that I didn't know I'd respond to and then be stuck with it. I was lucky, I could rent videos and read books. I'm sorry about all you guys who are having to contend with porn addiction on top of everything else. I wish there was a religion in which the most revered were priestesses who were devoted to teaching and having sex. Imagine a culture in which the highest honor was to have one's daughter be excepted into such a priesthood and men not having to be addicted to masturbation or playing pick-up and trickydick. Where they could actually be taught how to make love. Where women go to learn how to make love. As for sleeping nude....hugh? Don't pajamas and nighties get all bunched up and uncomfortable? Don't most people sleep nude unless there is a heating issue? I'm sorry for all the jackedupedness in human cultures. I'm sorry that we have to go through all this fire just to arrive where we start. I'm hopeful for what is after nirvana. So rock on and goodun to ya. And hey! How about sex on psychedelics?

There are parts of this that you wrote that are a prayer of thanksgiving. Thanks for sharing your wonder at the wonderment of IT.

This was written by Ram Dass and speaks for itself. Enlightenment is a looong way away for this one. It never occurred to me before actualized.org that there are somethings special for me to open things up here and now. I still need to clarify Awakened vs. Enlightened. I still need to study and prepare for using psychedelics to move toward Enlightenment. I want more clarity as to why I would be seeking Enlightenment. Basically I have been living this life with a, "The buck stops here" attitude. The issues have been so painful, I just don't wish the hard feelings on anybody and I know that somebody that I won't recognize as myself is going to have to suffer the consequences of my avoiding whatever I choose not to recognize as myself now. So here's an article that came across my wall earlier. How do we get trapped within psychedelic experiences? Posted February 18, 2019 “Paradise is the prison of the sage as the world is the prisoner of the believer.” – Yahja b. Mu’adh al-Razi "For many of us who have come into meditation through psychedelics, the model we had for changing consciousness has been of “getting high”. We pushed away our normal waking state in order to embrace a state of euphoria, harmony, bliss, peace, or ecstasy. Many of us spent long periods of time getting high and coming down. My guru, in speaking about psychedelics, said: “These medicines will allow you to come and visit Christ, but you can only stay two hours. Then you have to leave again. This is not the true samadhi. It’s better to become Christ than to visit him – but even the visit of a saint for a moment is useful.” Then he added, “But love is the most powerful medicine.” For love slowly transforms you into what the psychedelics only let you glimpse. In view of his words, when I reflected on my trips with LSD and other psychedelics, I saw that after a glimpse of the possibility of transcendence, I continued tripping only to reassure myself that the possibility was still there. Seeing the possibility is indeed different from being the possibility. Sooner or later you must purify and alter your mind, heart, and body so that the things which bring you down from your experiences lose their power over you. Psychedelics could chemically override the thought patterns in your brain so that you are open to the moment, but once the chemical loses its power the old habit patterns take over again. With them comes a subtle despair that without chemicals you are a prisoner of your thoughts. The trap of high experiences, however they occur, is that you become attached to their memory and so you try to recreate them. These memories compel you to try to reproduce the high. Ultimately they trap you, because they interfere with your experience of the present moment. In meditation you must be in the moment, letting go of comparisons and memories. If the high was too powerful in comparison to the rest of your life, it overrides the present and keeps you focused on the past. The paradox, of course, is that were you to let go of the past, you would find in the present moment the same quality that you once had. But because you’re trying to repeat the past, you lose the moment. How many times have you felt a moment of perfection – only to have it torn away the next moment by the awareness that it will pass? How many times will you try to get high hoping that this time you won’t come down – until you already know as you start to go up that you will come down? The down is part of the high. When in meditation you are tempted by another taste of honey, your memory of the finiteness of those moments tempers your desire. More bliss, more rapture, more ecstasy – just part of the passing show. The moment in its fullness includes both high and low and yet it is beyond both." – Ram Dass

I was at the beach here in Kalamata, Greece the other day collecting sea glass and colorful pebbles. I do great thinking when I do this and invariably when I get a good idea I find an absolutely perfect piece of class or an extremely beautiful stone. I like to tell myself that it is God validating my thoughts. Concurrently I absolutely understand that WHATEVER appears in my life at any given moment I AM responsible for. And there is no GOD as in HE. (not even SHE Lol) This gets a little kinky cause I refrain from saying, "I believe…" like in I believe in God or I believe in reincarnation. It cracks me up how people love to go all philosophical and try to convince each other that what they believe is the way it is. Then they judge themselves and others according to these beliefs. Just because someone believes something doesn't mean that's the way it is. Or is it? For them. Literally. For real. Like if I don't like my circumstances I can change my thinking about my circumstances and my circumstances will change. If I change my beliefs I change my life. The implications of this are astounding. And therein lies my mission. Well one of my missions. Remember that I said that I am codependent to the world? That's only a minor exaggeration. So here's another little story. This one is present time, the day before yesterday in fact when I was at the beach collecting. On Monday I spoke to my brother G's wife, N. They and their 2 kids live in my house in California. Life is extremely difficult for them and I was plunged into sadness, concern, and stress at the magnitude of the problems. So I'm focused, focused, focused and then I got an idea. And then I started with one of my conversations with God. I know darn well that I am not hearing God's voice in my head. You will be one of the first to know if I ever do I promise. It's just me talking to myself in my mind but bear with me as I give God a voice. So I'm saying, "Ah come on God. Not that. I don't want to do that. This isn't fair. That's being codependent and I'm having enough trouble with that as you well know." So God says, "You promised back in 1980 that if I let you do it your way and kept you safe that you would be mine and not forsake me. Well, I kept my part of the bargain and I'm calling in my chips now." And then I find one of the most beautiful little stones imaginable. See Cousin, I am going to ask you to do something. So I tell God that it is not fair to ask anything of you cause I don't even know you and I just dropped in out of the blue after a lifetime of barely even knowing that you are alive and for all I know I am now a pain in your brain cause I am reminding you of things that you have put behind you and am making demands on your time of which you have none of. So God says, "And so…?" So I say, "Ok, if I can do 45 sit-ups I'll ask him." (I did 30 the other day after a lifetime of not exercising so 45 was gonna be hard but not impossible. I only push the miracle stuff so far.) God says, "It's a deal but you have to give it all you've got." So I did 45 sit-ups.

Little Story continued: "So I, The Grand Imp got the idea to imbue some of my life/my perspectives, with my consciousness so that I might manipulate my elements from an elemental point of view. Some of them had developed hands with which to do this and so I took one of the larger ones aside and told it to never, ever eat the fruit from the tree in the middle of the garden. See it was a setup. I knew that it would eat the fruit cause that's what I would do. So then I embodied a handless creature and hid in the branches of the tree. It took a bit of urging on my part but the handed one ate the fruit and realized that there are no rules except what somebody else decides and that one must make up their own mind and make their own choices and TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR THAT. And then be free like me. It was a great moment and still and always will be, world without end, amen."

The way I see it, "Nothing is GOD'S Will." And God said unto the people, "Do what you fuckin' want. Just take responsibility for it for crying out loud and stop putting it back on ME. I am the WHOLE. YOU are the part. My job is to exist, your job is to experience. SAME/same, See/see?" HA/ha. GOD, ME and Tiko are rolling on the floor with laughter. Here's a little story. I AM THE GRAND IMP. I AM ALL THAT IS, ALL THAT WAS, AND ALL THAT EVER SHALL BE. I got really bored. Everything was just the same, same, same. Explosions, explosions, explosions. I got this idea to create life and to BE LIFE.