Thought Art

Sometimes we get a lot of joy being unwell and lots of pay off. Regardless, I can relate to this experience. However, someone not playing the game you play can be a good thing. Keep going and trying different psychologists.

@KH2 I graduated at 26. I was in and out of school in my 20’s. I was busy making art, reading, working, figuring out who I was, starting businesses, etc…. I had worked as a bookkeeper for 6 months before I went back to study accounting. This was a strong piece on my resume.

Maybe spending time with someone who doesn’t see you as a victim is useful. Maybe, spending time with someone who won’t play your game, sees you as rather normal and capable is valuable.

There is only one conscious being

1. Create a personal finance excel workbook. Treat it as an ever growing thing. Keep it simple but use. To calculate your income vs fixed expenses. You should know how much money is coming in, and what is going at at least each month. 10% of what you make, save. Buy finance books, and build the workbook over time. Also, actually look at your pay stubs and begin to understand them. Save them. Envsion this simple yet powerful concept: every month I have more in my savings than I did before. except: if you have debt pay that first. Except for student loans/ low interest loans… you should save regardless. Find your own balance here. lastly, make your own decisions. I’m not qualified to give hard financial or investment advice. Your savings is one of the most valuable things you can develop. More valuable than petty dumb stuff. It’s your castle wall. Build a mighty one, or be overthrown by outside armies. When you have 0$ to spend, there is $15,000 in your savings. Then, you say “wow, I’m flat broke”.

Start to value having money, over the things you can buy with it. Take pride and joy in seeing your savings go up. Read some finance books, look at your bank account more, set goals, never quit because it takes time and effort to change this.

@Hardkill You keep trying. I had to send out 30+ resumes to get an interview the first month after graduation. Then, I got laid off. Another month of grinding and using staffing firms while eating once a day at a food bank until my employment insurance came in. I studied and practiced all the interview prep, etc I mostly got rejections the first time directly after grad. The second time I mostly got rejections and I even rejected 3 or 4 interviews because of the commute. In the end I got great new job, with higher pay, better benefits, and they hired me because they want me to grow. You just keep going, going, going, going. You knock on every door. You show up. Each “no” means nothing about your ability to succeed. Now, I’m doing the same thing with marketing my Qigong course. I’m swimming in a sea of no. But I’m not quitting. Don’t have what you want? Simply be fucking relentless. What you desire, a job… or career in your field is very tangible and acquirable.

Solipsism has nothing to do with being a victim for eternity. That’s more you imagination than actual infinity or solipsism. Solipsim is more like “Of course I would always love you because it’s me”

Notice how fear based this is

@EugeneTheSage I mean, placebo isn’t bad. It’s actually not understood by western

You trip so hard you go full circle

What does respecting money mean to you? In the past I was very foolish with money. I didn’t really respect it, I sort of hated it in a sense. I was sort of a pie in the sky hippy at times. When I had money, I spent it on things I needed for my life purpose like courses, books, gear, etc i also spent a lot of weed when I was in my early 20’s. For example one time I wasted money on expensive pillows and bedsheets because I had a vision of the importance of sleep and the quality of your sleeping supplies (which I stand by… but I spent too much honestly). I’ve had opportunities looking back to save like 70% of my income and I didn’t do that. Honestly in the past my careless, disrespectful, foolish, reckless spending makes me ashamed of myself. I mean, I never really earned that much money before and when I had it I always had something I wanted. Sometimes I even get hit by waves of shame about how I treated money in the past. This year I have been reading lots of books on finance and about a year ago I graduated from college as an accountant. I realized that my lack of financial intelligence, understanding, systems and behaviour really fucked me in my life purpose. I love that I work with money everyday and I love reading about wealth, personal finance and financial psychology because I realize now how foundational it is. I even took a finance class when I was in highschool, but unfortunately I didn’t apply what I learned because of these unconscious limiting beliefs I had around money, and honesty even my ability to succeed in life. Looking back this was very foolish. I have learned a lot this year about the importance of being skillful with your money and respecting it deeply. My goal now is to really value HAVING money and not the things it can buy you. I still have so many courses I want to buy online, and things for my house, and a motorcycle and etc etc…. But, what I really want now… is a fat bag of gold coins. I am wondering what your journey with money has been like, and if you ha e grown at all what has been your process and where are you now? I’ll make a list of the books I’ve been reading here shortly as others may find them interesting. I love myself and because of this I am taking hard looks at all the areas of my life. I have been foolish, reckless, ignorant and too stoned at times to really respect myself as God, and as a powerful creator of my life. All my foolish mistakes of the past will be alchemized into pure Gold of my future self.

@Holykael Why are you imagining a difference between God and you?

@Tyler Robinson I don’t know. Sounds like everyone is judging each other here. Not every psychologist is for you! That’s okay. I’ve read enough books by psychologists talking about stories of their practice. Having a psychologist who ain’t gonna play games is good. But, also one that listens. Keep trying.

@Carl-Richard Yeah, Punching a guy to death with a brass ring isn’t it though. Totally good to be angry Healthy anger is a rather nuanced thing, can’t get into here

Listen to this audiobook

Keep looking for a good psychologist. Ideally one that listens, that helps you grow, challenges you a bit. A psychologist can push and challenge you. Sometimes someone calling you on your shit is healing. But, sounds like she was a bit too forward. I actually don’t fully believe it. Shop around…. Decide you will get well. Not all psychologists are the same. Not all are psychoanalytic who just listen to your story, try to u cover past traumas etc. Though, her behaviour is strange for a first session. Some of the quotes you provide seem a bit odd.

Healthy anger is the ideal here, as opposed to unhealthy, toxic anger or repression or suppression.

@EugeneTheSage Interesting. I don’t fully understand these things, how much is placebo, how much is energetic. I know that Sadhguru is very energetically powerful. I used to do his consecrated singing at one point and felt things I never had. It’s hard to remove placebo from things. But, we are the placebo Having certain materials on the body is likely to affect your Qi as Sadhguru says in other words. The Ring finger is the liver meridian, may be worth reading here. https://sage-answers.com/what-meridian-is-the-ring-finger/ And this https://www.yogapedia.com/definition/11621/ring-finger-energy anyway just glancing over this

Here is a great talk about addiction, low integrity and then becoming a person of integrity. Where ever you are right now, keep walking your path.

Always take safety precautions

Idk, I don’t think you’ll die from a trip permanently. That fear may hold you back from your deepest experiences.

@KH2 Man of your word

Waiting

Yes