BipolarGrowth

Especially if you believe or even can imagine or experience anything like solipsism. That’s what oneness is. It was my first ever awakening experience at age 4 lol. If it’s all you, you are all knowledge, awakenings, buddhas, gods, jhanas, enlightened beings, dharma, nonexistence, magic, fiction, beauty, deception, sexuality, meta cognition, genius, clumsiness, etc. ad infinitum.

Lmfao this is all duality. You’re everything. Including illusion. There’s no separation between consciousness and objects of consciousness. It’s all passing sensations that immediately cease to exist and change into a new “pattern” or conscious experience.

You unlocked the madness magic part of the mind. Congratulations. You’ve been creating it all along, but now you can finally make quick progress with or without drugs. You just have more fluidity in consciousness. Use the three characteristics of Buddhism (no self, suffering in all experience, and impermanence) to investigate these radical experiences.

You exist beyond death but also can never touch death for true no self is no longer any experience at all. But experience ultimately comes back online after this. Seeing this and having lasting insight on this is only done by the fully enlightened.

If you can only get high with substances, it seems like an ability out of your control. When you can break all possible laws of experience using a natural understanding of insight alone, you can be Perfection in any state and even beyond states. Drugs help develop insight if used right with contemplation though. But they are there to show you the possibility to do things even psychedelics can’t trigger with your own inherent nature as nonexistence and existence simultaneously.

Yes, the character realizes it can never exist, there is no present moment, and enlightenment is eternal death. Death is what gives beauty to everything. God doesn’t make it to full enlightenment because any experience is an illusion. You have to survive nonexistence to realize what full enlightenment is. Partial enlightenment can happen to the living, but the thing beyond both life and death is all that “experiences” enlightenment. This is parinibbana.

Work on your normal life and continue serious spiritual practice. If you become fully enlightened, you won’t care whether your finances are good or not. It’s honestly the best retirement plan — a retirement which is just as rich and well lived whether there is lots of money or no money. Always side with Truth. People love to talk about maintaining the relative side of things, and this is precisely what causes suffering for everyone.

Time is one of the things that gives the illusion of solidity. Even the present moment is an illusion.

I would give the advice to just be more honest about who you are. This honesty will likely create conflict and suffering in the short term until they realize it is useless to push you any further on the issue of having kids. If this is creating the level of suffering you are talking about, politely saying “I don’t feel like having kids” is not being honest. You feel much more strongly about it. It’s probably best to slowly reveal the full truth rather than show the full intensity of your feelings on the subject immediately.

You do spirituality to increase insight. Insight is a bridge between dualities. The deeper and more intrinsic a duality is, the more progress can be made from it. Leo is right. The ego does not get the power of God. By the time you can create whatever you want, you’ll realize the nature of experience and see that preferring anything over what you already have in front of you is pointless. If you are attached to manifesting one million dollars, you still would have to be under the illusion that there is a self who could benefit from one million dollars and believe that that money could somehow create anything other than an impermanent experience of suffering. The ego gets brought to its complete and final destruction through the three characteristics which are always baked into any experience. This is why Buddha called nirodha samapatti (the cessation of perception and feeling) nibbanic bliss. It’s the bliss of no longer existing. The most satisfying experience is no experience at all, and you can’t know that satisfaction until you have direct experience of going from samadhi, the ultimate absorption into the limits of experience, into the passing away of that most unimaginable experience into the impossibility which is the lack of consciousness, lack of existence, lack of God, lack of truth, lack of illusion, etc. If there wasn’t illusion, there’d be nothing at all. This isn’t the nothingness people talk about in spirituality. That nothingness is still a bundle of subtle sensations creating the possibility for experience. We’re talking about something so alien and plain that it could never be uncovered. There would be no distinctions in anything. Distinction and duality are the illusion, but without distinction, there would be no way to point to or even be truth. Nibbanic bliss is like being a Holocaust victim then going to deep sleep and having the relief of being completely detached from the miseries of your previous day except the enlightened person has the experience of ultimate reality and God which they are escaping from. They have reached the maximum temporary satisfaction that could be held in experience yet still want more. The only result is the complete loss of everything. It’s the dissolution of any possibility of self, suffering, and impermanence which is the best gift. Losing everything is the best gift. You can’t reach that dissolution experientially. After tasting that bliss, you realize that anything that could ever be real or formed or experienced is intrinsically tied to suffering. Any self you hold onto long enough to create a goal is guaranteed to create suffering. When fully enlightened, you become the arising and passing of everything simultaneously while also being absolutely certain there is no continuity that could ever accurately be called a self. You recognize that the present moment is itself an illusion. As soon as something can be perceived, it’s already gone. Even to say there is motion, activity, perception, distinction, consciousness, or truth is to imagine that any of these things could be defined in a way that lasts. There’s absolutely nothing to hold on to and no ability to choose whether to hold on or let go. A definition is a self. If whatever goal you want spiritually can still be defined, it isn’t the highest attainment.

Moldavite worked well for me. It’s all about the belief you give it.

It looks like losing free will. Everything just does itself. There’s no self left to have a will against what is occurring.

Enlightenment is not an experience. It is what remains when everything is lost. If enlightenment had any characteristics to it, it couldn’t remain throughout any possible state.

It can be a useful illusion to play around with.

Allow yourself to share the deepest insights with those who are ready to hear them. I’ve basically given up trying to help too much here because most don’t even have stream entry and aren’t eager to improve. Sometimes it’s better to only teach a few or even only yourself if no one is mature enough.

Existence and nonexistence are two sides of the same coin. Both are right.

There’s nothing that is permanent. Nothingness is a fine bundle of sensations, but it is a temporary experience and illusion nonetheless.

Just because there is knowing before and after cessation does not mean there is knowing in a cessation. Even samadhi is separate from watching. It’s commonly referred to as neither perception nor nonperception.

There is no watching in cessation.

Even watching can stop. It’s not permanent. Nothing is permanent.

No this is not a post about harming myself. It’s specifically about insight from the 9th Jhana. Death is perfectly real. You’re just something beyond life and death.

You don’t understand the relationship between existence and nonexistence which is making it impossible for you to perceive this specific bundle of sensations for what it really is. I tried to give a helpful response. If you don’t care for it and me trying to share what I’ve come to understand, I can just move on from the thread. No point in debating.

Just because it’s all you doesn’t make it less real. It makes it more significant.

It’s all you. It’s all the same thing. If you’re experiencing your emotions, they are there. You can experience someone else’s emotions too, but they only exist if you are experiencing them. If it isn’t sensed right now, it’s less than nothing.

There is no possibility for the best life until one has become death.