Roy

Member
  • Content count

    3,575
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Roy

  1. Was just about to say. If people post low consciousness cancer from people like Sv3rige repeatedly they will be temporarily banned.
  2. @Vzdoh was just trying to get to the center of how you feel about it, didn't mean to assume anything. Apologies. Yes I'd carefully think about and craft what kind of conversation you are going to have with him. Is he high in self-awareness and receptive? It might be that he knows he needs to balance his life more but it's just a habit he's "grooved" into. Do you think with some gentle support he could redirect that river of his life, so to speak? And most importantly do you intuit he wants to?
  3. @Vzdoh I guess the golden question is - do you value him and the relationship enough to wait for that day to come? How much is it worth to you, and what sort of future can you anticipate? Don't think only about the worst cases scenarios though. Also imagine the best ones I just noticed the way you worded the title,..... as if he's being somewhat deliberate about working to get away from you? Is that not how he was when you first met him, and did he make any of it clear at the start like, "Hey just so you know I work a lot and have a lot of responsibility with my career." ?
  4. How much time per week do you need to spend with him to be fulfilled in the relationship? If everything else about your bond is healthy, and you feel you love each other...... perhaps this is the test of patience until you move in together? If you were cohabiting you would probably feel much more content and secure in this even if he maintained his high work load.
  5. Either it's going to come to a boiling point where she will dump him to maintain the Christian identity and consider this chapter a sinful failure where she will wait for marriage. Or she will open her mind up enough to realize the dogmatic game she has been forced to play her whole life.
  6. How are your boundaries with your job life and your personal life? Do they blend in any particular way? Are you friends with any of your co-workers, and talking to them after work about work?
  7. That kind of suggestion is unquestionably sexual harassment and not acceptable. You are right to feel disturbed. Leaving was the right choice. Maybe you can't get at him legally, but he was short an employee because of his own unprofessionalism and selfish stupidity. Fuck him, hope he has fun running his business shorthanded! I wouldn't stir on it too much, as in blaming yourself at all. Sometimes there are just people out in the world that do such things, and you're in the wrong place at the wrong time. You are a victim, with no fault. As in how to handle it? Well the first thing (which is easier said than done) is try to get in positions where certain people might have so much power over you. Where you're more independent and autonomous during the day. Look for larger workplaces with more employees so there is less opportunity for intimate approaches like this, and it is less likely for people to try stuff like that because words spread quickly. It's nearly impossible to comprehend that kind of thing as a man - the shit women have to go through on a daily basis in the workplace and out in the world in general. It's awful. Maybe take up a self-defense course or carry some pepper spray in your handbag.
  8. My uncle was a criminal growing up and while age tempered the severity of his crimes, his narcissist manipulative behavior has never left even at age 63. My sister lived at his house for 7 years without paying a single cent. I moved in temporarily to get a foot in a new province and he started overcharging me $900 for a room, then offers me a chance to "pay it down" (instead of giving me cash) by helping work on building his new house on weekends. Essentially extracting free labor from me. Mind you I was already working 40 hours a week for him doing extremely physical labor hardscaping. I picked up on what was going on (albeit without acting soon enough) and gave him a month notice that I was leaving and looking for another job and place to live. Already knowing this was going to happen as discussed when I moved in, he still promptly explodes the next day and threatens me physically, realizing his manipulative scheme has been picked up on and is falling apart. I quit work that day, and left without paying rent for that month. He refuses to apologize. Now there is a rift in the family. My parents are moving to the province, and my dad wants to clock him in the face. He was lucky I didn't put him in the hospital or sue him that day for threatening me or denting my car. I was just too perplexed and dumbstruck at the time it happened.
  9. I would stay home and work. You'll have to make sacrifices but life will be easier for a while with family. You'll have more spare time to learn and educate yourself with your parents doing housework, and you'll be able to save a lot more money than being with roommates. Don't explain to them any of the actualized stuff, they won't get it. Just explain to them what you're interested in doing and your tangible plans for it. They don't need to understand anything else. Or don't share anything! Just live frugally and save money so you can get your independence faster and invest in your self education. Also, you need to drop the "wage slavery" bullshit ASAP. It's extremely toxic to your mind and your self-esteem. You won't be able to excel and get the most out of any lower end job if you resent it. View it more as a building block and first step moving towards where you want to be, not as a trap.
  10. This sounds extremely brash. Is it all said and done? Can you not get a refund for your plane ticket? Or get your college tuition back to invest in another form of education? I would strongly suggest you sit down and revise all this. It's going to suck but you need to have a talk with your parents. Explain to them what you're feeling and why your heart isn't in your current schooling, and that you need time and support to figure out your next steps. If they are good parents they should understand why you want to be happy. I know you probably have this strong inner urge to get up and go but $2000 is honestly fuck all let alone for a city like Miami. It's important to be strategic about life and not just follow your impulses at first feel. This could end up being a really stupid decision. Sorry to put it that way but it must be said.
  11. You can still have a successful relationship even if you've got some wounds! Just have to be extremely mindful about your behavior and what you're putting "on" the other person. If it's a healthy relationship they should offer some support and guidance, but it's 90% up to YOU to be doing the work and making the changes within yourself. Personal development is exactly what it is. It's PERSONAL and intimate to you, not anybody else. You never want to be relying on another person to keep you afloat or as a distraction to what you need to work on. However a great relationship can boost your life in so many ways that it will become easier to address those issues. You can have it all if you want, just know it's a lot of work.
  12. @Ketrumi Hundreds of millions of people have taken various Covid vaccines and are completely fine. The question you have to ask yourself is do you want Covid, and do you want to be responsible for spreading it to someone who might get way more sick than you? Because that's likely what will happen.
  13. What even is a "normal" human being at this point ? It seems the more you find out about the world, things and people just get weirder and weirder.
  14. Here is a good song that can be interpreted as talking about solipsism, to tie you over
  15. Most successful people, or those at the top of hierarchies all have some really bad skeletons in the closest in order to have gotten where they are. It's unfortunate but it is what it is. Just focus on what you can learn from them and discard the rest. Try not to idolize people, you'll eventually become disappointed. Never "meet your hero's" so to speak. Become your OWN hero.
  16. Well that should take the sting out. She ain't even gonna be there anymore. You know what's funny I remember this EXACT same thing happened to me when I went to college in 2011. I was getting to know this girl for about 3 weeks and was getting into her, then when I expressed myself about where I wanted to take things she told me she was looking to drop out. She packed up and was gone that weekend. Can you describe a bit more what you mean here?
  17. Cool. Good luck! Just be mindful about how you come across. You don't want to be doing this from a place of fear of losing her or missing out, or she'll sense it. Be genuine and casual about it, tell her what you (actually) appreciate about her and how you feel. It's counter-intuitive but those vulnerable moments where you open up, are actually where you show a lot of strength and security. Regardless of what happens (what she says) it will still be true.
  18. If you really really like her, then make that known ASAP and pursue her. Regardless of the outcome though, if she rejects you and/or gets with that other guy, you need to be detached though and realize where you are; You are at a college campus! There are plenty of other girls you will like. Don't worry if one doesn't work out. It's not like it's a small town or island where it will taunt you forever
  19. I will strongly consider buying it when it comes out. I was a gamer for a long time but I have not been interested in any games that have been hyped up or have come out in the past 5~ years. I mostly just stick to Eu4 when I want to play something, or a different shooter now and then. AOE2 (The Conquerors Expansion) was one of the first games I ever had, it's aged quite well and is still great to this day. I have it on Steam.
  20. How much do you need? PM me the exact details and I could E-transfer you. Sometimes it's just better to bite the financial bullet in order to get out of a situation.
  21. Confront him directly about it. Put him on the spot and tell him what you didn't like about it. He'll either apologize and gain some respect for you, or won't take ownership for it and the relationship in whatever capacity it exists will end. Either way you will both know where you stand. You don't want it to be in limbo.
  22. A lot of places. There is a ton money in real estate. Houses are expensive for a reason > because of what is being put into it.
  23. Adeptus is a good guy and has actually brought up some fair criticism of Leo. Y'all need to relax. It's not like he's accusing him of being a child rapist or some crap about the old Actualized logo.
  24. We live in a physical world where physical force is quite tangible and useful.