Roy

I don't know what you need surgery for but if possible try and work to get as much money as possible. Work every day and take every shift available. You'll be able to move out much faster and it'll be more and more hours you're away from that toxic environment. I've been in the same sort of situation with my dad, who was quite disruptive and argumentative. Always putting me down. You just don't feed back into it. A lot of the times they're looking for an argument and love the yelling, it keeps them from addressing their own problems by projecting. Don't give it to them, just say what you have to say to manipulate them into calming down and not caring as much. Spend as much free time as you can outside away from the house. It'll unlikely you'll change them at their age especially with the power dynamic of you depending on them for now. That's ok, you're worried about developing yourself, not them. What you need is to minimize your time with them if it's that draining. You'll be able to cope better and absorb the negativity if it's in small doses. Hang in there @TheUniverseIsLove. Make a plan and be strategic about what I said and things will be more manageable now and better in the future! Good luck with your recovery

Waaaahhh. Life isn't fair, awful things happen and justice isn't served equally in all cases. Too bad, get over it. Stop trying to selfishly make this a comparison about which race suffers more. Black people have every right to be upset currently and historically. Either support them or stay out of the way. Making it a comparative game just slows down progress and makes you look like a twat.

@LfcCharlie4 Not to take away from his swagger & obvious skill, but I think if end up being the stereotype of the slightly-foreigner-pseudo-spiritual kind of guy it's relatively easy to get with a lot of women. They swoon over that shit because it seems so new and exotic compared to the typical bragging strong male westerner type that they're exhausted of.

There are an endless combination of contraceptives you can use to keep the chances of getting pregnant extremely low, and then if by some divine stroke of God you somehow get pregnant and really don't want a child, you can get an abortion. Which of course may or may not be an option depending on your willingness to do it, or if it's even legal where you live. I wouldn't abandon sex for so many years because of some ridiculously small statistical chance. Live a little.

@lostmedstudent If your body physically doesn't have the ability, it just might not have it. Every body is different. However you still must do the work deeply exploring yourself sexually (alone with solo masturbation as well) if you haven't. Western society for the most part keeps women repressed sexually and conditions/shames them into being timid and passive, and that enjoying sex as a women is "dirty". You need to identify if that conditioning has been holding you back and affecting your attitudes about sex subconsciously. Have you really explored and seen ALL the different kinks out there? What gets you going, specifically? These are the questions you need to ask yourself. You need to genuinely be willing to explore all the possible triggers to find and unlock the thing that could help you have multiple orgasms. Having regular vanilla sex over and over just isn't going to cut it. Remember this is your private domain, don't let the shame and projections of others people and society dictate this part of your life to you, it's none of their business and they'll never know what's going on in your bedroom anyways. Don't hold yourself back by being scared to express yourself in this domain, and don't be afraid to get dirty as hell Edit: Don't forget toys! Buy lots of toys, my partner and I have a nightstand filled with about 20 separate toys totaling a few hundred dollars. You have to invest if you really care about this part of your life!

Violence in the name of Green values doesn't make it Red or Blue, it's still green. A Red or Blue wouldn't be using violence for environmentalism or social justice lol. Violence is a deeper primordial force that can be co-opted and used from any stage and their justifications. WW2 > The allies fighting back against against Blue for the ideals of liberty, individualism, and freedom of Orange.

@lostmedstudent Yes, for my girlfriend and I it happens on average about once or twice out of every ten times having sex. I can make her cum anywhere between 3-15 times during a session so it's pretty much inevitable that we'll cross orgasms at the same time haha. I guess the trick is I make an effort to really pay attention and learn her body language so I can gauge when she's close and adjust myself accordingly. I know every inch of her body. Taking my mind off myself and focusing on her helps me last and control my own orgasm a bit longer, which is important to save for the big finale because I only get one then I'll start to hurt after, except on rare occasions. Also make sure to have very clear communication while in the act, literally let your partner verbally know where you're at and ask them where they are at so you can sinc up together. Don't make it unnatural and obsess about having a simultaneous orgasm though. It's important for good sex to surrender and go with the flow of it instead of trying to control everything. Remember you're doing it to relax and relieve stress it's not a box to check! Enjoy - Roy

Some people have natural internal clocks like my mom who can magically wake up whenever she wants/has to with no alarm. Meanwhile someone like me would literally miss work or appointments every day without alarm technology. My natural body cycle (if left unregulated) is to be awake 18-20 hours and sleep 8-10 hours. Which of course pushes my waking time ahead a few hours each day, so can't wake up "naturally" at a certain time. So the point is...... do some rigorous experimenting! Find out what your body does on it's own and make a plan around that.

Let her project and demand all day long, doesn't mean you have to do what she says . Just ignore it and let it bounce off! "Yes mom." "You're right mom." "Ok mom." Meanwhile you're doing your own thing haha.

I think this should be pinned in some explanation thread for people trying to understand this. I've never seen such a fantastic summation, nice post @Leo Gura

I'd recommend getting a part-time job somewhere immediately @Aquarius, doesn't matter where really. It will be a nice balance that will force some structure on your life which you need right now (waking up on time for something). It will give you a sense of purpose and momentum, and also give you the chance to learn to value your free-time while you earn some money to hopefully save for more important things in the future. Right now not having any obligations is just making you feel aimless and depressed, and therefore useless. Take the challenge of instilling some discipline, you'll thank yourself later. Don't give any energy towards the thoughts of comparing yourself to other people your age, our minds tend to sabotage our own self-worth that way. You'll always be able to find someone "better" at life than you to compare yourself too and make yourself feel shitty. It's not what you need right now so cut it. You are on your own journey and are simply at where you're at, and that's OK !

Of course your journey is different, but from all the wisdom and experience I'd gathered from myself and others over the years; I really recommend stay with your family another 1-2 years. There are a lot of benefits to this and I wish I did it. - Work somewhere full-time to get a sense of what kind of job you won't mind doing in the future. It builds a foundation for your work ethic which you can apply to college and to future jobs. - Save up a financial nest egg so your time is enjoyable now and isn't strained and stretched totally thin while in school. You can then focus on studying and have more free time. - It allows you to keep building a deeper relationship with your parents sticking around, as more of an adult than a child. A new kind of respect is found this way. - You'll have more time to discover yourself and dive into your passions, which might change what kind of school (if you go at all) and allows you to shape and plan your future to be more realistic. Most of the feelings of having to leave are subconscious social pressure. You're considered "slow" and "missing out" by most for not leaving ASAP. That's just a bunch of peer bullshit though. Personally I wish I didn't cave to it, I would have been 10x better off for it. Hindsight is obviously 20/20 though as they say!

@Preety_India Thank you I'll keep that in mind.

Self-deprecation is a good way to relate to people, so they don't think you're talking down to them. It also breeds humility. I try to be continually self-honest for my own improvement first and foremost, in order to kill the old me and the ego that ran it I need to expose the deficiencies. Of course it's still kicking around, it's always a work in progress.

I was single for a long time so I can relate @Lyubov. You have to realize though that most people are getting into the relationships for not completely genuine reasons, they are looking for "another half" or because of the social pressures you mentioned. A partner isn't going to fulfill or complete you though, you are ultimately on your own journey in life and a relationship is really just a support system with the nice benefit of deep connection and ability to create a family, but not absolutely necessary to find fulfillment. You're feeling insecurity because there is still a feeling of something having been unexplored (assuming you haven't been in a LTR), and you're afraid to fully commit to the fact you're an independent person. As well as caring too much about what friends and family think of you. Drop those worries. They are just projecting the same pressures they felt onto you now that they are "secure" and it's there turn to do that to other people like they had done to them. Have the confidence to go it alone against the social standards of your environment and commit to what's true to you and the independence you want Don't be afraid to double down. Hope this helps cheers - Roy

It's one thing to have knowledge that things like sugar or smoking are generally bad for you. It's another to be truly aware of how deep the suffering can go. Most people will verbally acknowledge it's not good for them. The ego won't realize or fully admit the true consequences until it is completely engrossed in them, and by then it's mostly too late. Your friend isn't suffering enough for that to click yet, which is sad but it is what it is. You're angry and frustrated because you personally are aware, and are trying to make her aware as well. But you have to let go and accept things as they are. It's likely no matter how much preaching or educating you attempt it will be pointless, you can't lead a mule to water. There will just be endless resistance. Let her come to her realizations on her own, and gently support her along the way. That is the path which will lead to peace for you @Kay100 Hope this helps - Roy

Maybe awakening is just a distraction from everything.

I've experienced something similar though not on this forum. Have you considered that the image you're projecting of that poster represents a part of you you don't want to confront? Perhaps what they said upset and resonated with you so hard because it's an emotional weak point that you need to shore up, and it's painful.

@Raptorsin7 You are worrying and thinking too much friend, just be. Those thoughts will go away if you focus on the important stuff and the things that make you happy in the relationship. They are likely just manifesting from anxiety of expecting things to go perfect. How do you find out if you're mature enough for them to dissolve? Challenge yourself to pursue the relationship and make it a goal for them to go away. It can be an actuality for you, if you let it.

The height difference really isn't that bad when it's Male>Female. It's pretty natural for most couples, and women like to feel small and be held anyways. No matter how dominant or assertive they come off initially this will typically be the case. Which this will lend itself too and play into the "cute" factor you seem to like If you find her attractive and not off putting sexually, but her personality and values are amazing. What more do you want? You have to realize @Raptorsin7, you'll always see 9's and 10's out in the world. No matter how attractive the person you end up with is, there are so many people in the world you'll always end up spotting someone who's hotter and more attractive. But that's just purely visceral, which is an instant 3 second process that happens. What you'll find after you get deeper into your relationship with her is that the love and connection you build will create an attraction that's much stronger than any surface appearances you find lacking. If you're mature enough those insecurities and hang ups will dissolve. If they don't well then you have stuff you need to work out yourself, that won't be solved by simply hopping to the next person.

What's fascinating is people can go through their entire lives believing some sort of depictions or metaphors of heaven and hell as if they are some post-death far away places, all the while missing the truth that's right under their noses. Heaven and hell exist literally, right now in our current world. A wise thing Jordan Peterson said is that the decisions you make, even the smallest ones. And the kind of life you live in the big picture contribute to either one of those becoming more prevalent. So you better be watching out for what you're doing!

How intimately do you know you? Everything else becomes more clear as you deepen your understanding of yourself.

Stop debating. You are better than that, and you know it which is why you brought up "letting it go". Debating is a Stage Orange (and even Green) close-minded dick measuring contest. There is very little fruit to be drawn from it, if any. What you spend time on is having discussions with those who are willing to learn because they aren't satisfied with their current knowledge. People wonder why progress is so slow for humanity - well it's because of people smashing heads and spinning mud in the tires through debate and confrontation. Trying to convince other people of things and preaching to them just breeds resistance and keeps them stuck. Help those who are ready and leave the rest to become ready on their own.

I was in the same place for a long time @Elshaddai with the loathing and being cynical of the world. It may feel like a "righteous" place to be mentally, and that you have an accurate view of the world. But it's just a selfish and warped perception. The worst part is it's not even the kind of selfishness that serves you, it's just an illusion that is put on to appear smart to other people. You'll come to realize over time (or already) that it's a limiting, toxic, and self-destructive perspective. You can't just stay in that place forever, because it's tiring and will eat at you and your average happiness levels. You need to work on orienting yourself towards the things that make you happy. Life purpose is a great center for this. See Leo's course for more. You have to spend as much free time as you have aimed at the things you want do, don't waste it on other people and their BS. As for loving and accepting yourself, realize that everything happened exactly as it needed to happen for you to be where you are now. Where you want to change and are trying to move yourself in a better direction. Don't resent the past, because it will keep you stuck and stewing in those negative feelings, which doesn't help you move forward. What happened is just what happened, and it's OK! Once you really get that down you're able to be more present and can focus on the future you want more. Hope this helps - Roy

I said this a while ago, the American experiment is played out. Just let it die, resisting will just make it worse. The US was good for some lessons for humanity, but now it's limits are on full display perpetuating it's decline. There is nothing more to learn from America. If developing people around the world want to see what to emulate now they should look at Canada, and other European/Asian countries like Norway & Japan. America as a global superpower and leader is on it's way out with a foot already out the door...............