aurum

I think there’s depths of nonresistance you can get into. What you’re describing here sounds like a basic level of tolerance, although I could be wrong. I’m talking about a dramatic shift in your levels of resistance, usually which happens all at once when you can’t take it anymore.

Because a relationship is a cooperative endevour. If someone is cheating, i.e the relationship is essentially failing, then both parties probably have some fault. Let’s say a man steps out and cheats on his wife. The initial response from most people would be “boo, he lied and cheated. What a scumbag”. But no one is seeing all the hours his wife is nagging him, eroding his self esteem and making him feel less of a man. So he cheats. Now you might say “boo, his wife is such a bitch, it’s all her fault”. But no one is seeing all the times where maybe he didn’t appreciate his wife, which caused her to nag him. On and on this goes. Now factor in that both people are just responding to the societal programming they’ve been given since growing up, and you realize that blame is really just a joke. It’s impossible to actually blame one person for anything. So if there’s any problem in a relationship, both people need to take responsibility and at least be willing to examine their behavior.

@archi It’s a fair question, but I’m curious why you’re so concerned about your friend’s problem.

Usually it’s either because she’s sexually frustrated or she feels no sense of stability. Just depends on the situation. The way I see it happen the most is she’s out partying with her friends and gets swept up in the emotion of the moment. Some guy is pressing all the right buttons and she just goes with it. But I’ve also seen it where she will be far more deliberate about it. Cheating is whatever you say it is. There are no hard rules in relationships that exist. Only the ones you as a couple decide upon. For some couples, having sex with someone else wouldn’t be considered cheating. It just depends. Honestly, I think “cheating” is a bad term. It implies that the “cheater” is wrong or bad and that the other person is the victim. In reality, almost any situation where cheating takes place is a two way street.

Ground yourself in your spiritual practice. Get a daily meditation habit going if you don’t already to keep yourself emotionally centered. The rewards will come when you are ready, not a moment too soon or a moment too late. This is more than about just pickup. It’s about you learning to consistently tap into who you really are.

No it’s not. It’s hard to understand with words if you haven’t experienced it. I like to feel good, so under normal circumstances I would not choose to sit there. But if you’ve made the deliberate choice to sit there, that’s what you’re doing. That’s reality at this moment. Might as well accept it.

@el_duderino Awesome man!

Pain isn't as bad as we think. You can experience this if you practice Strong Determination Sitting. You're sitting there in the most awful pain, and you think that's the reason why you're suffering. Until you have that breakthrough moment where resistance drops completely. Once that happens, the pain is still there. But it's surprisingly enjoyable. All that suffering was you not trying to be where you are. Pretty ironic.

It is FOMO. Societal pressure saying "you have to be at X by age Y". It's all bullshit. The way you beat FOMO is by being crystal clear on what exactly it is that you want. The more certain you are internally about the direction you're going, the less anybody else's opinion is going to matter. So I would ask myself: if I took away the opinions of others, is that what I really want? If the answer is yes, just go and never look back.

@Aquarius If your family provides for you financially, that's something I would take advantage of. I would sink a lot of time into making your art and just go as hard as possible on your business for now. You are probably going to spend a lot of time alone because of this. I don't know anyway around that. But the good news is that the sooner you're financially independent, the more freedom you'll have to be social as you choose fit.

@EmptinessDncing Marketing isn't awkward, your definition of marketing is just limited. Marketing doesn't have to be you being this sleezy salesman. Leo's free videos are marketing. This forum is marketing. I'm marketing right now. In a sense, everything you do is marketing. The only question is whether your marketing is effective and adds value to everyone in the process. It's not about pretending, it's about understanding who you are talking to. If you have a five year old kid, are you going to teach them the same way you'd talk to a grown man? No, because they have different perspectives and different levels of understanding. People get so tripped on this because they think it's "fake". It's not fake, it's caring and being empathetic enough to relate to your audience. Of course you always want to speak your truth. And some people will just never resonate with it no matter what you do. But the point is you can explain that truth in many different equally valid forms. To be something like a spiritual teacher, it's not about you and expressing your opinions and having to be right. That's selfish. It's all about what does this person need to hear to get to the next level? Everything else is more or less irrelevant.

@Rilles Many reasons. Some may be honestly open minded and searching for truth, but they just haven’t yet had any sort of spiritual experience. Others are too invested in their current belief system because it practically supports them. If you’re a famous scientist with a successful career, you’re probably not looking to burn that to the ground. Which is possible for political reasons. It’s easier for us to say that scientists should just be open minded, but we were blessed to grow up in the age of the internet. I’d argue the internet, and social media in particular, has been the biggest catalyst for the mass awakening going on right now.

@Peace and Love Lol some of the things he is saying might be accurate. But let's be real, what he really wants is to fuck other girls. The reason @SFRL and I can say this with such confidence is because literally every guy is like this. I'll put it to you this way: there is no guy who looks at Dan Bilzerian's Instagram and doesn't have some part of them that thinks it's awesome. The only difference is whether they admit it or lie and repress it. Does that mean men aren't capable of monogamy? No, I wouldn't go that far. There are definite cons of always seeing new girls, so monogamy can definitely be appealing at times as well. Particularly if a guy has already had a period of being very sexually active and is just kind of "over it".

Because he can feel / see the chakras and knows how they manifest in human behavior. For instance, he saw that my heart chakra was very closed. You don't need to be an enlightened master 9000 to know this person will probably have difficultly feeling and expressing love / compassion. I would get a session yourself and see what happens. Just make sure they're the real deal and not some guy who bought a reiki course online last week.

First thing you need to do is just sit and feel. Don't even meditate, that's already doing too much. Just go somewhere you can be alone, sit down, and just feel whatever is going on inside your body. Good, bad, happy, sad, ugly, scary, doesn't matter. Don't try to feel, just feel. Do this for however long you want, but I would suggest at least 30 minutes. You're probably be shocked how much you're unconsciously stuffing down by running around and not taking the time to do this. Emotions come and they go. The way you don't bottle things up is simply by doing what I'm talking about. You just feel. And if something wants to express itself physically like crying or punching something, you can do that too. That alone will do a lot of the healing. But also reflect using that set of questions I gave you and logically breakdown what happened. Is the story your mind is telling you absolutely true? Anyway, this is a good thing that's happening. These are often the kind of moments when you grow.

Yes it definitely was helpful for me. The first time I got reiki, the healer was able to read me in terms of what was going in my life with crazy accuracy. So that made me a believer. I'm also a certified healer myself.

@ThomasT Be careful thinking that the money from a half a million dollar rental property is going to set you up for life. What if the real estate market tanks or the economy goes into recession, just like it always does? You're placing a lot of faith in that one decision. That being said, half a mil definitely is a really good start if you use it correctly. Considering you're 19, I think you should really take this time to explore. Just try and whole bunch of shit, whatever interests you at the moment. You're young, so you often don't have enough data to really say what you want out of life at this point. Just get a bunch of experiences, but also stick around good content like what Leo talks about.

@TripleNipple Yes I would get a girlfriend. You need to have experiences.

There's tons of different ways. Meditation, yoga, breathwork, bioenergetics, ho'oponopono, psychedelics, and reiki just to name a few.

Yes and no. Yes because of all the spiritual stuff you've already heard. It's all one, you can't love someone until you love yourself, you are in charge of your emotions, etc. But I'd also argue that human contact is about as essential for the human experience as oxygen. Even animals interact with other animals and form various types of relationships. Is there a stage where maybe you're so enlightened that even that becomes irrelevant? I have no idea. Theoretically I guess there could be, but I don't think any of us are there yet.

You'll probably never really know. From my biased perspective, it seems like an unnecessarily extreme move. It's not like you move to a monestary and that void feeling goes away. No, it just comes with you to the monestary. The only real benefit I see from doing something like that is you'll have more time to specifically devote to formal spiritual practices. That is a potential real gain. But I'd argue you could get more or less the same results without having to do that.

Just stay sober and keep putting yourself out there. When you have those painful lessons, don't just ignore them. Reflect and become aware. Why did this happen? What could i have done better? Why did this hurt? Why did I need this to go well? Can I let this go? Your successes can also be healing because you realize that the world isn't as against you as you thought. They reinforce that good things can happen to you and that you deserve them. There's no magic pill that I've found. Even to this day, I still have experiences like what you're talking about. That's the conditioned mind. Just keep going out and being social as much as possible thoughout your day. Build a social circle. And stay present to those experiences that make you feel like you're going to die. When you're not doing that, work on your inner game via all the stuff Leo talks about.

@Widdle Puppy Congrats for being willing to take action on this. Your problem isn't what you think it is. "Not celebrating the small victories" is a symptom of a deeper level issue. The reason pickup is so emotionally volatile is because, when done properly, you're being healed. Healing involves bringing up old emotional wounds, fears and destructive patterns that we've been conditioned into. So the answer to this: is that you don't. Fear and shame can't occupy the same space as joy and celebration. At the root cause, what really needs to happen is a purging of that low vibration type of energy. That doesn't mean to stop doing game until you've all these emotional problems. Keep going out and keep approaching. Find the ways that snap you into "state" so to speak and keep doing them. But also, consider doing inner game work. That would be things like meditation, yoga, etc. And answering questions like why do you need a girl's validation? Why do you need it to go well?

What is the mistrust protecting you from?

@Roch People treat you the way you treat yourself and others. If you don't feel like people are treating you like an equal, ask yourself this: 1) How am I not treating others as an equal? 2) How do I not see myself as equal? Really contemplate on this.