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Well, interesting fetish Your body has some pain and your pain body is associated with sexual pleasure, so for your mind, having pain equals having pleasure in sexual activity. so start doing some consciousness practices and some shadow work to resolve the complex.

I don't even use music while meditating, because I consider that being calm is better than music, let alone while watching video hahaha

@7thLetter you're welcome! well, removing yourself from certain hood means literally expanding your limitations! thinking about how to get away from the certain neighborhood > town > city > country subsequently is also expanding your restrictions and for abstract term I'm using EXPANDING YOUR BOX. if something stops you to move away from hood, like being dependent to your family members psychologically, not having enough budget to rent another home in a better city or having inner fears to be in uncertainty are also restrictions per se and they could be the root of the surface restriction ( why don't you just walk away from that environment!! ). simply you should trace back by asking questions.

YUP!

I totally understand you... with lower emotions you're doing the self-sabotage and self-sabotage is also a kind of an action which is in opposition with the direction of self-actualization! try to do things more passive-aggressively or be manipulative towards your family members in a very softer manner. try to push them little by little everytime softly not being angry toward them or... and then ultimately, think about moving away from there and try to learn things to make you independent financially or psychologically. ( I know it's way hard to start to think about it but start the process anyway ) self-actualize yourself in this tight situation, you know psychological growth happens right in the harsh moments.

I don't know what definition gives another guy talking about the box. Maybe different definition. but anyways, simply, my meaning from box is something that puts restrictions and limitations for you and it has imposed directly from your EGO. for example, imagine an old-timer unpretentious guy from a small town who hasn't seen anywhere other than his own small town, he has always commuted to work and has run errands only in his town. his box is so limited to his own town. but imagine a tourist lady who has just traveled across Europe and hasn't gone so far to ASIA or MIDDLE EAST, although her box is more expanded compared to the previous example, again, she has her certain expanded "BOX". the box I'm talking about could include anything: from the behaviors that you're demonstrating in certain places or with certain people and could be also places. The "BOX" is my personal abstract term for any limitations and restrictions you see anywhere! Hope you understand!

well, everything has double use, majority of people use it for their negative reason ( 4 example :escaping from the reality of their status quo and etc) and they act out like dumbs, that's why it's illegal... speaking about sugar beverages and cigarettes, do you think any government in the world including first and third world shut down these companies and factories which are lucrative businesses and they get advantages and their own cut from these businesses? BTW, psychedelics and beverages are categorized differently and the policy of countries exhibit different behaviors for every topic...

But not impossible. practice makes prefect!

Sometimes you should break out of limited box, in order to change your life, the box could also be a repetitive place!

You're welcome pouya wish you the best

Hahaha, Sounds so familiar to me :)) I was in the same path when I was in your phase that you are right now. do you know what makes me regret every time when I look back at the earlier times of my life? listening to my unconscious parents and relatives! I don't wanna say, you should go and wage a war against them or..., No. later on, I thought that I could be manipulative and do my own passions passive aggressively without listening to them. I completely understand you that you're in the phase of prior to entrance exam and everybody can get on your case easily when they think they have no other things to do and getting on your case would be something like the reaction of parents towards mediation: what the heck are you doin' in this important phase of your life? I completely understand your situation because I've been through the same phase as you are. and one key thing that you should consider: be aware on a second by second basis what decisions you make or what makes you limited and rubs your freedom of your choice so on and so forth don't contemplate on enlightenment, for now, contemplate on how you're going to roll out your life in the near and far future, focus on your needs, passions, what excites you, what you type of life you want, what standards you want and the list could go on forever...

@Pouya even increasing your awareness won't be a bad thing to go about your life and make some good changes in your life, sometimes being extra conscious means that you get so selfish and you get so immersed in the following your own goals that it hurts the feeling of your parents and their culture, but you don't give a damn because the passions you want is your own passion ( even the passions that your surroundings would consider it an absolute insanity), the important point is that being spiritual doesn't mean, you always should be selfless, so from now on, bust your self limiting beliefs (with the tool of consciousness)

P.S: if you think that doing spiritual practices are somehow hindrance to your survival needs, even reducing the amount of practices isn't that bad for making initial progresses in the material life.

@Pouya There are no shoulds and shouldn'ts in this universe, right now I could go and jump off the cliff and terminate my life, but hey, Reality doesn't give two shits about me either being alive or dead! so keep this one in mind that all roads wind up in the same place from the infinite intelligence POV! ( and also this doesn't mean you can't get help from that source in tight life and death situations!! ) sometimes we get in the way of survival needs to take control of them because if the controller slips down from our hands, soon after, it will backfire on us and again our survival will be against our survival, see the irony? but that doesn't mean being involved in the game of survival is a good or bad thing per se, it's our own preference that how we're goin' to play the game.

iT'S ALL THOUGHT AND DON'T TRY TO STOP AND PUT UP RESISTANCE, JUST OBSERVE IT AN LET IT GO by the way, if you're feeling truly overwhelmed, seeking medical advice would be rather beneficial!

Simply every kind of lie!

without energy you can't do anything, energy is in the first priority.

Stress hormones should be decreased to zero with rigorous meditation practice, Coffee makes you more stressful, Conversely Green Tea makes you more relaxed and calm ( Adrenaline and Cortisol ) Secretion of Dopamine, which plays an important role in the sense of motivation and has direct relation with rewarding center of the brain, should be taken control of through the practices of delayed gratification Melatonin hormone plays a key role in Sleep Cycles, Regulating the secretion of this hormone helps the person to wake up refreshed in the morning so Caffeinated beverages suppress the Melatonin release just prior to going to bed. Serotonin aka Happy hormone is released during exercise or eating dark chocolate Endrophine also is released in physical activities and is more similar to Serotonin Those are all hormones you should consider for your own personal development, the others are more for medical studies and of course for that reason, I'm not going to mention Erythropoietin here :))

It's been asked so many times in Forum, anyway, I should say that it's everywhere, there's no inside and outside! it's ubiquitous!

Well, in order to make a remarkable development in your life as an individual, a significant part of yourself should die to in order to gather yourself up to make a new part of yourself one which is more potent and productive. in case of Spiral Dynamic, If I speak about my personal life, I was very low in spiral dynamic, then I played with so many perspectives and beliefs, ultimately I understood that none of them were true then inched my way all up to the yellow level due to the sense of curiosity and having above-normal intelligence. so The life is the playground of Trail & Error, Try to play with it and get a personal taste and experience of the life, and then as a result, your inner gift and potential will blossom!

You can't kill your ego until you die physically! but what happens that by doin' more consciousness works, it'll be decreased in size and you'll be able to take control of that! but sense of self is already there, so rest assured! and doing all of these and actualizing your true self, doesn't mean you can't go on with your life chatting up girls and other appealing things you could do in your life. Remember : YOUR LIFE IS A PLAYGROUND FOR YOUR CREATION, AND DOING ALL OF THESE PRACTICES ARE JUST FOR BEING AWARE OF THE POWER OF YOUR CREATION! PERIOD.

As far as I'm concerned, yes they are but one thing you should consider: you should have the ability to distinguish 2016 Leo from the Leo who lives in this moment June 2019, for me, I'd say that I have that ability to watch an old video and spot the error of him which he'd himself would say the same thing, but that doesn't mean they have been completely outdated and that doesn't mean he should remove the old videos from the channel! remember everybody including consciousness teachers go through different phases in terms of evolution, watching old videos of Leo and comparing those to the new ones will give you precious lessons ipso facto!

The answer is it all happens in your brain. by watching porn you're conditioning your brain to the video ( the conditioning of the mind happens during the orgasm ), every time you watch the porn the neural network related with that gets stronger and stronger and the dopamine release after watching porn is somehow responsible for the deterioration and that paves the way for psychological addiction ( not physical addiction ) the benefits of ceasing to watch porn is that you never use it for instant gratification but you make an endeavor for delayed gratification like trying to take your personal development further, learning how to attract women and etc... if you have any further question about this subject, don't hesitate to ask!

well, almost every body has gone in the path of consciousness practices for the sake of their needs in life! I have my personal reasons for being here and perusing higher consciousness. to be free of suffering, anguish, pain, and bring more joy, and be brave and courageous. and doing the work for preserving Ego isn't bad at all, again it's the game of your ego that brings up all of those negative narratives against itself. do the damn work and don't pay attention why and for whom you're doing it! at the end of the day, serving the ego with the by product of enlightenment isn't that negative!

consciousness work won't make you feminine, if you won't want to bringing more awareness to your body opens up the valve of the energy channels one of them which is male energy! open your third eye and try to be chickenhearted, it's impossible!