Matt8

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About Matt8

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  1. I have part time job I am looking for full time job it's not going well I've done 2 interviews 1 personal 1 online conference call and lot of phone calls. I would say it's harder to find job now during the corona virus. Also when I interviewed I didn't get all the answers right so I know I have to improve that but what bugs me is that I really want to tell employers that I'am willing to work hard and that I will invest lot of time in the work but they heard that stuff before and think I'm not taking it seriously I feel like I want lie to them and make up stuff just so that they hire me. The thing is that I've worked in an company before (part time job) and I saw what people do on their full time job and I have also seen various interviews based on the position participants were applying to and what I learned about those interviews was that: the questions sometimes don't relate that much to what you need to know to do the job they sometimes pick based on personal preference (which I think Is not good when they get judge by personal matters which are unrelated to work) you sign up for something and do something else or it's not as good as you thought it would be Every employer wants to hear something else so it's sometimes about luck I don't know anymore It's complicated I don't want to get into the details I will probably have to write on some other forum which specializes in IT since I'm looking for networking related job but there is more to it then just having knowledge you definitely need it but you also need attitude, look, fake smile(IDK why I put this here just carry on), mindset, experience .... etc.
  2. It is really complicated I did discuss this theme with people who do parkour but they didn't help me much. Me and my friend started doing parkour 6 years ago, he had more courage our skill was closely matched but I just wasn't brave enough, he got better than me then after 2 years I started going on parkour trainings alone (different city) after 2 years I had a 1 year pause I started going to the gym and tried doing calisthenics right now I go to gym do calisthenics and do parkour but less intensively than I used to do those things. I know that there will be always someone better than me but one thing buggs me, "the progression" I don't know shit after those years of training, I mean sure I learned something but I just maintain skills and when I learn new ones it's taking too long I tried everything and found out I am unlucky and I lack commitment. I did like to watch parkour videos but one thing happened It stopped to motivate me now when I watch something I just see all the pain, commitment and hard work behind it and I just wonder how the heck can someone do that. I almost CRY when watching those videos and I used to watch them and be motivated but after trying and doing those things it's different. I imagined myself trying to do those things and remembered how I tried and failed and that's what made me almost cry. The next thing is that I forgot or got out of shape how to do some things I used to do so I am going backwards There still are some other things I keep improving but I need to also re-learn.
  3. Without that word the sentence wouldn't make sense but you can replace it with "think" if you want. What did you mean by that explain please, also if you have any practical advice i would appreciate it ;-) thanks
  4. Thanks for your advice, what I meant by "I am critical of my self" was that when I do something I am not sattisfied because I could have done it better and when I do there is still another way to improve it. Also important to mention is that somethimes I want something what is too hard and when I try me best and dont suceed it demotivates me even when im trying multiple times somethimes when you do some things incorectly it doesnt matter how hard you try. Im also feeling lost in solutions every time when I think something will help me and I try it and it doesnt work its desorienting its like solving a math problem without knowing what are you doing.
  5. Hi there, When I want to do something what interests me like my hobby or work, and procrastinate I get depressed. About procrastination in my case it's based on previous failed attempts (feeling of regret, wasted time and energy) and telling my self the surrounding, circumstances are in my way (when in reality the only thing blocking me is myself). I really think too much about everything that stands in my way and get overwhelmed and discouraged by it. I also have limiting believes I am scared of investing even a tiny bit probably because I am cheap although I don't have financial problems yet. The problem (it happens 1-2 times a week in my case on average) is every time I feel depressed or sad I make it even worse by not exercising, not sleeping (getting 5-6 hours of sleep instead of 8) cause I watch something useless(youtube, anime etc.) or just having depressive thoughts. It's hard to make your self do something when you're depressed you have no energy nor motivation. Next important thing related to self-critical is doubting your goals, I do some things I enjoy and they make me happy but on the other hand I know some of them won't make me money (I would need to invest lot of time in them to earn something) at least i think so. I should do things I enjoy but I deny them to my self usually when I'm depressed or when they involve money, time or effort investment Thanks for your help, have a nice day!
  6. I think a lot about how to utilize my time to the fullest. More specifically I am writing about the time most of us don't use creatively(or to the fullest) like traveling by a bus, train, walking outside I always think I could use this time for my hobbies or work the problem is the place you are in and surroundings. For example when I travel I study and read self development but what I really should have done is bought a nootebook and use it to learn better or program, edit video persuae my hobbies. I have an interesting problem when I think about doing something for a long time few months years it can be a little stupid thing but I just need and have to do it otherwise I get depressed over it even when it seems unimportant to others I somehow make it my priority. But when I do it (it can be a little thing) I am happy so I guess trying more new stuff is my thing. And I hate wasting time even though I do it and is sometimes inevitable.
  7. I made some short videos about gymnastics and composed some short music loops it's always a good learning experience but what I'm doing now is reaching out to people on the internet and i want to try other platforms maybe broadcast a video still thinking about it I am not sure. I also don't want my family to see what I'm doing or trying to do I think they don't quite get it . Doing new things is always difficult but once you started its fine. I sometimes feel like trying a lot of new things it can get overwhelming.
  8. Thank you all for your advice, it gave me some ideas and helped me to understand. About what I know do and want to do. I finished IT highschool have ccna Cisco certification and real work experience but I like and do multiple things like video editing, music composing, gymnastics, little diy projects the problem is there's too much of it and specializing in one field is in my opinion the right thing to do. You have a good point in having patience, working consistently is important that's also a thing I've been struggling with lately, my problem is that I want to do things as best as I can and wear my self out quickly, that results overworking and then lacking motivation or not being able to keep up the pace. I appreciate your support, have a nice day!
  9. Hi there, How can I live off my hobbies and interests? I assume it is harder than working for someone. Also there already are many people doing things which I want to do. I don't know how to go about it. Next thing I was thinking about is making new connections. The way I would like to make friends is by finding someone with the same mindset. Ok thanks, have a nice day