thibault

Hey man there's two separate issues in your question : First I'm sorry to hear that watching Leo's video has triggered some intense feelings in you and I advise you to take care of yourself and maybe try to avoid these kinds of topics for a while. If I told you that you were only real when skydiving but you had a massive fear of heights and would actually hate skydiving, you probably shouldn't go at least for a while until you've gotten over your fear and are comfortable with the idea. To be honest who cares what is real or not, if it is not bettering your life. Now to answer your question. YOU have not gone through all this suffering and you will not. That is because you are not identified with God. If you were, you would find all this suffering beautiful. Why do you think suffering exists? Only so we can know what love is.

True open-mindedness requires closing your mind to the paths that don't lead to an open-mind. It's paradoxical just like everything in life.

Do you see the subjectivity in "something that happens", real vs unreal, and mind vs body? If I suddenly remember the name of an old friend from school, is that not a real event? Yet it's happening entirely in my mind. When you ask "Can something create itself?", are you looking to answer this question on a foundational level or for a specific case you have in mind? If you want to start somewhere, ask yourself "Do my thoughts create themselves?".

Look inwards. You can't ask potentially fake people about whether they are real or fake. The only answer you can find is in you, not in us.

"When can we schedule your haircut?"

What is an event? What is a real event?

To your brother who went to the high gravity planet, there is 140 hours of experience in between these two moments. The fact that you insist on this or that being "true"/"undeniable" reveals your fear of observing reality as it is and your need to conceptualize it to reassure yourself. Accept that the past and future are concepts, you have never been in the past or future, only ever the present, so how can you be so sure that they exist? Take DMT and contemplate the past, I'm sure you will come back with a much different understanding of what it is.

What about the possibility that reality is more subtle? Take only the word "before" from your post. Let's say your bother left on a journey to a super-massive planet with very high gravity. Being in a high gravitational field increases the passage of time. In this case let's say 10 times faster. Do you think you and your brother would have a different understanding of the word "before" in those circumstances?

It is not right, it is not wrong. It is an illusion. You are pretending things happened before now because you like it. In reality, there are ways in which there is a past and ways in which there isn't. The definition of past is limited. But it is good enough to give you a survival advantage. Which parts of your life would crumble without a conception of "things happened before now" ? What I'm pointing at is not whether or not there is a past, that is entirely irrelevant. However notice that when you ask the question, you ignore the most serious implications of truth seeking. You assert there is a past when in fact you are closed to the possibility that there is none, what is the point of asking the question if you are only ready to hear one of the two possible answers? EDIT: If you need some edge cases to challenge your definition of "past", try defining the "past" in a black hole.

My view is not that there is no past. Your view is that there is a past.

This is only how you choose to see it. This has nothing to do with the Truth. Why do you need there to be a past ?

As you are reading this reply that I'm writing, notice that you are carrying in an infinite number of assumptions about what is currently happening. You imagine there is a man writing a message on a keyboard located somewhere on Earth and that this message is transported through fiber cables or satellites to your computer. Then you read that message on your screen which is composed of pixels shining light onto your retina. Some parts of your brain are then used to interpret that message. These are a small sample of the assumptions that you layer on top of life to benefit your survival agenda. If I were to ask you why you assume any of these things, you would generate an infinite number of justifications for them about electricity, science, the brain, etc... The reality is that these assumptions which you take as fact are only illusions. When you cease to assume these things, reality ceases to exist in the way you currently experience it. There is only a past because you need a past to survive. If you could survive using only instincts then you would have no need for a conception of time with past, present, and future so why do you assume your predicament in which coincidentally you NEED a conception of time to survive/exist is the truth ? Could it be just a gentle lie you tell yourself so you can keep existing ?

According to quantum physics your post has always both existed and not existed. It is your observation of the post that collapsed the wave function to a finite "exists" state. If you're asking if there is a fundamental answer to the question you're asking, the answer would be probably no. This is because you have a bias as to what is "fundamental". Reality is fundamental, nothing else. Beyond what is here, there is nothing, otherwise it would be here and not beyond.

So this is the part I don't understand. If everything has been 100% friendly up until now, why would he be pissed ? It sounds like he was expecting more. It also sounds like you knew about that on some level because you know his reaction will be to get angry. You can't get around that, either you misled him and you should apologize to him or he imagined something that didn't exist and you should not tolerate his anger. From what you've said so far it sounds more like the first one to me. I would think about it yourself and try to answer these questions to get some clarity. Ultimately, make sure to remember this will be a miniscule incident in your life, don't overblow it.

What kind of reaction are you expecting from him ?

Why is it that there is such an imbalance in the friendship where if the guy loses romantic interest in her, the friendship ends ? That is not a friendship, that is a one sided romantic relationship, and you can't just "not notice" these dynamics, they are thousands of years old we feel them instinctively. You can however lie to yourself which is what I think the OP is doing to cope. The more of the truth you tell him, the better the outcome for both of you.

In 30+ years you have time to face plenty of rejections, you get accustomed to it. You aren't afraid for his feelings, you are afraid of losing his attention.

Why do you fear rejecting him frankly ? Because you know (at least subconsciously) that since the beginning, all he was interested was being with you in a romantic way, and you know that if he loses hope he will disappear from your life. Otherwise what do you have to fear in just being honest with him ?

You have a very naïve outlook on dating, get ready for lots of heartbreak. You played a game of keeping an older man interested in you because it gratified your ego. When he finally propositioned you, you turned him down. It happens.

@Jodistrict Every post you make in this thread reveals that you are just inventing what you think Spiral Dynamics is as you go. Your fundamental mistake is confusing distinction for hierarchy.

Maybe read the book I don't know ? Watch Leo's videos on it at the very least ? I have no clue how to cure your cruel lack of education on this topic. You are walking Dunning–Kruger right now.

Trying very hard to miss the point. Yes ! Of course ! People in urban neighborhoods live the same as people in the jungle ! All bow down to @Jodistrict, master of consciousness !

Can you study the Spiral Dynamics model thoroughly before posting nonsense in a thread about Spiral Dynamics ? The original poster is asking a Spiral Dynamics question, if you don't agree with Spiral Dynamics, that is fine don't post here. It's like going into a thread that says "What is God's plan?" just to post "I don't believe in God". What is the point exactly ?

He also missed a lot of other things. At this point I think he's doing it on purpose.