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Seeing life as the teacher. Every getting triggered stems from issues to look at and reflect on. Looking out for ways I make things about myself.

People can have peaks of experience lasting for some hours, days, or months. Adyashanti speaks of what he calls the honeymoon period of awakening (or was it Rupert, can't remember). I do not consider myself enlightened, it makes more sense to me to reserve that term for the burning of all karma, the end of all craving. I am in an abiding non-dual state with plenty of issues to resolve. I'm not even at a point of having the mind quiet from surface level thoughts, let alone subconscious churning on deeper levels.

There seems to be possibility of deliberate or naturally occurring transmission of energy from some people. Whether that helps someone awaken really depends on the person's receptivity, which can't be predicted. One could say it's just some people's dharma to get "hooked up" by someone's or some place's energy.

@ActualizedDavid ❤️

I wouldn't phrase it like that. I just mean I suppose people could find some benefit in questioning the existence of self or other etc in contemplation. I'm not into that type of approach myself.

@Tony 845 From what I saw people's kundalini generally died down by the time they reached 1k. I had some kundalini stuff going on but it died down before I dealt with Ramaji's stuff. Ramaji's book has a list of where he places different teachers on the map, and a pretty decent description of what the states on his map look like. He puts Rupert at 1k, Shinzen and Adya in 700s (iirc), Eckhart in 600s. I have no opinion on how accurate that assessment is. In my opinion his map for 600-1000 is quite accurate, however the phenomena of alternating between void and god keeps repeating several times past what he calls the end. Ananda might be in a non-dual state, I wouldn't know, however it's apparent she has a lot of growing to do as a person.

@ActualizedDavid Self love has been a tough one for me. I have a deep unconscious dislike of myself that is yet to be resolved to any meaningful degree. Probably one of my deepest blockages, or if not that, most bothersome. Thus take what I say with a grain of salt. But here's an experiment: Imagine someone you adore, someone you love unconditionally. Maybe imagine if you had a child, or a pet, as towards them it's probably easiest to get close to unconditional love. Because you can clearly see their innocence. How even if they mess up, it's because they don't know any better. It's just a child being a child. Or a dog being a dog. Picture it. How understanding you'd be of them. How forgiving you'd be. Now, as a child grows up, life traumatizes them. In one way or another. Defences are created. Walls are built up. To protect that innocent being. One could say that innocence has been tainted. But isn't it completely understandable why this was a necessity. The child did what they could, and became an adult. One with scars, with cynicism. Afraid to open up again. Does that make them any less deserving of love? Everybody is like that. You are like that. Does that make you any less deserving of love? Why would you respond to that with anything other than love? The love you can feel for someone dear to you. Someone innocent but scarred. Like a wounded child. Allow yourself to expand that love to include yourself. All the things you dislike about yourself. Love the person in you who feels unworthy of love. Love all the scars you have acquired. To allow them to heal. To allow yourself to heal.

@Toby So fear does exist for them on some level.

Working on contemplating why you feel incomplete alone could be helpful. Why do you feel your life has to fit a certain narrative where it must go your way? That's what clinging is - adamantly insisting reality remain a certain way and work out a certain way. It won't. Reducing your neediness probably will not happen overnight. As it seems like you're significantly more invested in her than vice versa, there's a good chance things won't work out. Imbalances in neediness between two people are draining for both parties. The less needy party feels overwhelmed, and the needier party will never receive enough attention. Acting less needy is of course a good idea, but as long as the reason you tend to be needy is not worked out, you may well fail to do so.

I had three mini-glimpses early in the summer before last, all after waking up from a nightmare. The first time it happened I sat up in disbelief as my experience of self didn't feel centered inside my head, behind my eyes, but was sort of spread out. I was shocked because I firmly had the belief nothing good would ever happen to me. Later that same summer, I had an awakening that seemed to endure for a few weeks and never completely closed down. I had a friend over. He mentioned that he happened to have mushrooms in his car, so I was like why the hell not. We took them and I laid down on my bed while he was in the other room. Soon enough I was lying there in frustration. I didn't notice any sort of psychedelic effect and was frustrated because of course I now couldn't sleep either, due to the stimulating effects of the substance. Then, all of a sudden, I was nothing. Undeniably. I came out of my bedroom. My friend said something along the lines of "this one seems to be quite a body high". In my mind I was just thinking "if only you knew". Around December and January I shifted into non-dual states of increasing depth and seeming clarity. Another deeper one in February. Some alternating emptiness-centered and god-centered states. A glowing phase in April, which felt quite nice. Since then things got more stable and subtle. Being in a non-dual state has become the norm and I can't really remember what duality is like. Non-duality is significant as it happens, but anything that sticks around becomes normal. Suffering is still a thing, and will be as long as there's any karma, any ego. My path has involved a lot of purging and been rough, as it continues to be. Being in non-duality isn't much of a consolation in face of that. Shedding the ego is a long process, and the more rapid it is the more intense and difficult to bear it is. Or so it would seem.

Visualizing what you're reading as you do it can be useful. The more senses you use to take something in, the deeper of an impact it has on your mind. Good for remembering things. It's a technique used in speed reading as well - you visualize the ideas you glide your eyes over, allowing for better retention of information. I'd imagine it's especially important in that case because you're going at a fast pace, which would normally have a negative impact on retention.

If you've burned all your karma, which the Buddha supposedly did, then no. It's a long-long way from having some insights/experiences of emptiness and God to that.

@Tony 845 Short version: yes. Nuance is important though, so here for the long version: I and some friends/acquaintances got transmissions from Ramaji around a year ago, a little more. Few of us went on to make forum posts about how we were enlightened, in a rather juvenile, what one might call zen-devily way. Here's what I gathered from my experience: 1) Yes, Ramaji's transmissions do have an effect and can in a number of times facilitate entry into a state of abiding non-dual awareness. What I mean by that is becoming consciousness of nothingness behind self and world, a falling a way of the normal contracted sense of being an observer sitting behind the eyes, as well as the doer of the body's actions. It personally took me 6 times iirc to experience what Ramaji refers to as 1k. Some people were told they reached 1k but didn't really experience anything. So it was varied. I've also heard that some people have had countless sessions over time without much progress, and it would seem as if the transmissions may be weaker nowadays. 2) 1k isn't by any means the highest state of enlightenment. I wouldn't call it enlightenment at all, although by this forum's general definition it is an enlightened/awakened state. There's many depths of enlightenment. Ramana Maharshi, who Ramaji considers 1k, was definitely nearer to enlightenment than Ramaji. It's not even a comparison. Likewise, the depth of enlightenment between Ramaji and people he awakened through transmissions, including other RASA givers and his wife Ananda Devi, is nowhere near the same. Ramaji has a four-decade plus journey behind him, people can't just get RASA and be as enlightened as him. 3) Ramaji has plenty of ego issues, as do other RASA givers. 4) Ramaji could help you reach non-duality, perhaps, but it's important to point out the path doesn't end at that. You'll still have layers upon layers of karma, which could cause anything from a deep-down dissatisfaction with life to hard-to-bear suffering. If the suffering is more mild, being in non-duality will make it easier to be escapist and pretend like there's no I, life is perfect, etc. Someone who takes years or decades of contemplation to enter a non-dual state will have more perspective and maturity. Hope some of that helps.

@Bodhidharma The mind is a tool. The usefulness of it depends on where it's coming from. There's a difference between insight, contemplation, practical thinking, and egoic, fear-driven thoughts. Being mindful, it should become progressively clear which is which. "Don't listen to the mind", like anything, must be taken in context. When the mind is triggered - involved in petty judgments, rationalizations and other selfish things, it's a good idea not to listen to that crap. To the extent that it's possible. Leo's videos on intuition and higher self vs lower self might be helpful to your question, from my memory of them.

Non-duality is something worth holding as a mindfuck or pointer to aid in contemplation, not turned into a philosophical subject of thinking. And especially not a subject of conversation with family, friends, or a significant other . Talking to regular people about non-duality is out of touch. They can't relate it with their lives. You're not meeting them where they're at. Trying to live based on non-duality as a philosophy is an awkward trap. What's actually valuable and fruitful is living by the feeling-truths you gain on the path. As soon as you make it logical, it becomes something it's not meant to be.

@Truth Addict ❤️

Every person lives in their own world, many of those worlds are different from yours in ways you can't really fathom. There's reasons for emotional reactions people have. In the example you give you seem to be looking at this from a rather left-brained perspective. Of course people care about their emotions a lot. So do people who consider themselves more logic-oriented, it's just not as overtly expressed to others as among right-brained "stage green" types, but rather masked behind ideas of reason, logic, focusing on facts and so forth. So - start to look out for that in yourself. You can work on listening, trying to understand where the other person is coming from better, by trying to assume their perspective of looking at things. One's perspective expands with time and life events, as long as you make an earnest effort to see what the world is showing you. You'll always fall short of truly seeing others, but falling a little closer makes a difference.

Escaping from life never works in the long run, whatever you try. Suffering's still there, so once you clearly see that, might as well choose a healthier strategy.

@AlwaysBeNice the first point is semantics, I could as well say it causes physical damage. The other stuff is demonstrably false, though I hope you won't have to find out via personal experience. I get why you'd not believe it since these things are quite rare.

I have a theory about that, based on the experience of two acquaintances as well as energy readings of them + Martin Ball. One is a case of obvious abuse where 5meo was mixed with another psychedelic, the other one just did it a dozen times in about a year (if I remember correctly + don't know dosages). Both had a kundalini activation, the former went through months of a horrible dark night and the latter had an insane amount of kriyas (energy movements) pretty much constantly. What I think is going on is the substances (most likely in excess) releasing a lot of energy in the system, more than the body can deal with, and that damaging the subtle body and leaving it vulnerable to energetic influences, which then allows astral energies, that literally feel foreign and out of one's control, influence the body and mind. And I'm quite sure that's where the idea of negative energies, entities or demons "possessing" a person comes from - it's a projection onto how it feels like. Martin Ball mentioning doing weird things like the God voice and barking like a dog sounds exactly like that. And the two people I know struggled with experiences of possession and even attacks at various points. I know people who can sense people's energies and have noticed a similar presence of foreign "entities" in Martin, the people I mentioned, and a few teachers. In most cases it seems simply weird rather than flat-out bad for the person afflicted but in worse cases it's quite hellish.

Pretty sure he's not. Not in the way we use the term anyhow.

@The White Belt What's the result of all this though? You feel better when you're high, you feel fascinating things - duh! But are you actually growing? And is there actual chance of this leading to abiding non-dual awareness?

It's true that next to nobody is fully realized, obviously not David Deida or even Ralston. I don't deny psychedelics can produce becoming conscious of stuff, however, I know of nobody who has achieved a high level of abiding non-dual awareness with them. And if it's not abiding I don't see why they'd be an effective tool for enlightenment. With a cautious approach it is an array of amazing experiences and glimpses, of which hardly anything sticks. With a hardcore approach one messes up their subtle body and chakras and ends up in a weird state with weird energy like Martin Ball. I think psychedelics have certain dangers that don't become apparent until people develop a subtle enough sensitivity to energy. Until then it seems all good.

@Malelekakis Who says all of that will be destroyed? After enlightenment you can do anything you could do before, the question is just whether you want to. You don't have to renounce life, leave your girlfriend or your family, if you don't want to. And if you did want to, it wouldn't be a problem, would it?

@Jed Vassallo You misunderstand what it's like. Enlightenment is the end of suffering, and abiding states of non-dual awareness are pleasant as well. The world, you, and others will continue to exist, it's just that the way you see all of that will be radically different.