Emotionalmosquito

What do actualizers think of the movie Soul? https://youtu.be/1gjrVACqo2w How accurate is that scene? Does the ego remain intact enough to fear the godhead or cling to certain aspects of the previous life such that one avoids the return to source? Another possibility is reincarnation being an archonic trap. I’ve seen several sources warn to avoid the light at the end of the tunnel because we’re tricked into thinking it’s the great beyond but actually it’s just the outside of vagina number 8,248,957,661. That this is done to trick us into coming back over and over so malevolent forces can feed on our soul. It makes sense from a logical stance because why the hell would anyone wish to keep returning to a planet packed full of unfathomable levels of misery and suffering? If the goal was to come back to assist in the salvation of others, wouldn’t it be better to join a benevolent alien race like the Pleadians or Arcturians so you can help from a vantage point?

After a short break I’ll practice this technique with “I Am Fearless” affirmations everyday until no nut november. Could be potential in this. Will post results.

@PurpleTree probably mom and dad, unless you’re into that

He speaks with Terence McKenna level vocabulary and articulation and makes video on topics like reality deconstruction, detachment, solipsism, philosophy, freeing the mind, psychedelics and more.

I’m not gonna go full incel and say it’s ? percent his looks but I mean come on The ratio of looks vs skill is very debatable @Kshantivadin I’m not in any way ashamed of what I did but nor am I proud of it. I just find it thrilling to talk about weird stuff randomly and I thought the edge would rub off on them in a better way than it did. But good video and I will apply it’s lesson. Pardon my being so dense but I’m still not clear on all this. On the first post you said I should have released my attachment to any particular outcome. Then you say I actually SHOULD have focused on what I wanted. Sounds contradictory. What am I missing?

This may be a tad lengthy but try to bare with me. So last night I went out to chat up some Stacies and practice socializing. As usual, I find a group to sit near so I can people watch and eavesdrop until the inspiration to swoop in and join the fun occurs. Most of them leave so I go into the main area bar and karaoke room. As I’m standing there, I get tapped on the shoulder and led outside. The female bar owner basically tells me “we don’t like your kind around here” although in a subtle more polite way. When I asked she said the reason was because apparently I said something “extremely inappropriate” to a group of ladies last time I was there. Let me elaborate. It was slightly more crowded there that night and I was standing alone watching a game of corn hole. A nearby table of the aforementioned group invites me over to hang out with them. A few more minutes pass and I do. Since I despise small talk I immediately jump into the good stuff which surprisingly seems to not put them off at all. I may have achieved some level of small talk leading up to it but ultimately I ask and get them all to agree that they are indeed open minded and curious of what I have to say. I then proceed to start talking about my fascination with period blood and possible benefits it may have beyond a mere waste product. To put things into perspective for them, I used the example of fecal transplants. “People used to think obviously since shit is pure waste it couldn’t possibly have any health benefit, but now they squirt healthy bacteria rich poop up peoples’ asses to save them from potentially lethal bad bacterias like C. diff as a standard medical procedure. So just imagine all the things we’re still missing out on because the normies deem it too icky to think about.” I go on to speculate of the possible uses of period blood as topical balms or oral supplementation. I also talked about seminal fluid in the same light. Half jokingly, I also said something like, “Perhaps if you were to wire whisk sperm and period together in a goblet, maybe throw in some spirulina/chlorella and light some candles you could make it all ritualistic and call it the Speriod Sundae.” (One of them even acknowledged spirulina being a good ingredient to add.) “Because you would be taking the vital essences of both genders and blending it into a super serum to achieve god tier levels of health and vibrancy.” Now here is the most important part. The whole group was completely intrigued and invested in the conversation. It wasn’t one sided because they gave me plenty of feedback. I got genuine smiles and giggles throughout. One of them complimented my skin and said “idk maybe there is something to it because your skin looks amazing.” “Question is how much do I really want to know, L0L” Keep in mind I didn’t suggest I’ve actually tried this, at least not to this extent. The approach ends up being a fun and light hearted interaction and I leave feeling more confident. So unless they were Hollywood level actresses deceiving me, why the actual fuck did they feel the need to report me to management?!! The other thing that gets me is while I was being chewed out by the owner, she told me the last few times I’ve been there I’ve made everyone uncomfortable yet she never once warned me of misbehavior, so how the fuck was I supposed to know? I now have a permanent ban even though tons of others are 10x rowdier than I ever am and all they have to do is go home for the night. Also, people sing terribly vulgar songs at karaoke and they all jam out to it. It makes zero sense. Another hypocrisy is what I call the “South Park Bias”. A different much more laidback bartender that I talked to afterwards at the neighboring bar confirmed this. If I would have told them I was completely kidding and I saw it on South Park, odds are it wouldn’t have been nearly as big a deal. In general people love and admire that show for its cutting edge and boundary defying humor. But when random ass me comes along playfully using the exact same humor, suddenly it’s war because I’m not a rich famous content creator yet. Part of the reason I selected this topic to present with is because I’ve been seeing people around this forum and other sources say women love it when a man is able to be bold and talk about whatever is on his mind because it means he’s confident, and it makes them feel more comfortable opening up about the weird thoughts they have. Furthermore, I figured this specific topic would show them I am capable of accepting women for everything that they are, complete with all their functions including the ones 99% of other guys find repulsive. I couldn’t have been more wrong. How is unconditional love not a turn on? The other time I got kicked out of a bar was at a different place and it was for very similar reasons. Only that time the manager was nice enough to say I just had to throw in the towel for the night. When I arrived home last night, I used the rage to fuel a very juicy workout. Problem is, as usual, I couldn’t turn it off all night. I was burning alive with anger, blood pressure through the roof and heart palpitations all night. I had a kratom, cbd and turmeric stack and it had about as much effect as a queef to a category 5 hurricane. I’m on the verge of fully joining the incel brotherhood but I want to be better than that. The fact that I’m not able or allowed to express myself in the social matrix is currently my biggest challenge. I even told the bar owner that chads and girls get much more leeway than me and she couldn’t give a straight answer. Apologies for my poor writing skills and any input on the situation is appropriated. TL;DR: kicked out of half the places I try to have fun unless I go full robot.

Where did I say that? Just because I’m coming off as defensive doesn’t mean all my replies are in vain. Everything I’m being told here I will keep in mind next time I’m on the battlefield. So for that I thank you all. I understand conceptually how I probably looked pretty alarming, but the putting myself in their shoes and feeling it part is difficult. In another day or two I should be completely recovered emotionally so hopefully that will make it easier. It would be nice if they had their rules written down for low EQ people like me. @SgtPepper Very nice step by step advice. Thanks. Problem is I have next to nothing in common with the majority, especially in my area. Working on it (Shit) I take it you didn’t see this video Just watch the first part. This is interesting because it leads me straight to another thing I wanted to say. First off I have a question about that statement. Are you saying if I would have surrendered all expectations of outcome I would have been received better? You’re correct about me not being unconditionally loving because if I were, I wouldn’t have been the least bit triggered by any of this. But you say I desired a certain outcome and that’s why I got cast out of the garden? I would say it’s more like I desired only one main outcome to NOT transpire, exactly the one that did. I consider myself—and about everyone I know would agree—to be extremely nonjudgmental with the exception of one thing, and that is when I am the one unfairly judged and condemned first. I have a very hard time forgiving people for this reason and my ego automatically demonizes them when it happens. I’ve seen most of Leo’s vids on things like paradigms, biases etc. and it all makes perfect sense in theory but in practice it’s nearly impossible. Nope. Only drinks.

@PurpleTree How is the thought of attending court not a massive boner kill?

I was never given any warnings, I didn’t even do anything at all to kicked out this most recent time, they just assumed I would based on previous actions, other people do objectively worse and only get sent home for the night. I could have rapped Eminem’s Fack on the karaoke, the song that closes with, “shove a gerbil in your ass through a tube” and had everyone jamming out to it. Hypocrites much? I mean you can’t even do a handstand in a wide open area at this place for fuck sake. Let’s take it from this angle. If I’m sitting there with some bros and I invite a girl over to come chill with us and she opens by asking if we’re open enough to hear something a little wacky and we say yes, then she says something that weirds us out, What’s the kinder thing to do: A. wait for her to leave then say “wow that was one crazy chick” and move on or B. Report her to management trying to screw her over as much as possible? (Assuming the complaint would be at all effective) It’s a typical case of the classic, “Your personality gives me the heebie jeebies therefore there is something wrong with you” People get so shaken up over the dumbest shit you can’t even go apologize because they’re so locked in self defense mode at the near sight of you it’s hopeless to even try. I’m not trying to be mister perfect here, perhaps I didn’t take enough cold showers or meditate enough that day so my energy wasn’t quite right. But I know for a fact I was treated unfairly, the fact that they gave me no warnings says it all. Take this forum for example. Mods will issue you warning points for misbehavior, you get to 20 and you’re banned. That is infinitely more reasonable.

“open-minded” hmm... I can relate to that struggle. If so many more girls are into this stuff than guys, where ya’ll hiding at? I very rarely get a positive response when I open up about such things. If you really are the more spiritual half of humanity that’s great for me but it sure doesn’t look that way. Maybe it’s the area. As for you, I guess just do what Leo says and go to hippie gatherings and take your pick. Shouldn’t be that hard for you to find cargo ship loads of options at places like that. Plus do shadow work and so forth.

Because the court of public opinion has never been wrong in the past. It most definitely appears that way. Give me an example of how I could self express authenticity in an acceptable way. I thought the essence of confidence was being free to act and speak your mind regardless of what people think. If that’s true, isn’t it a contradiction to then say, oh well it has to be in a way the normies find appropriate? I was invited to it. I warned them I was about to go into uncharted territories before proceeding and they said it was fine and they were intrigued. Let me make sure I understand the advice I’ve been given so far: Don’t talk about anything until you have thoroughly probed the person’s mind to understand what they find acceptable or not Do boring small talk at first and see if the person is willing to communicate or not Accurately read body language (which I now know is ineffective because people will put on very convincing acts out of fear I might get mad) Feel good emotions in your body before you talk to someone because they can sense your vibe and they’ll be more open to interact Understand all the social taboos so I’ll know to never speak of them. In what way shape or form could it be any amount of fun to have to restrict yourself to such a tyrannical set of CULTural standards?

I’ve tried tons of other ways for several years and nothing works. Out of those millions of other topics most people are only willing or capable of talking about less than 0.001% of them if you’re lucky. Leo said if you’re good enough at game you can get away with telling a girl you just met you’re going to rape her. If that’s true it really must not be about the words. I’m not stupid enough to try something that extreme so don’t worry. At this rate that’s about as likely as an overweight 60 year old chain smoker with a bad case of covid climbing Mt Everest The way things are going, I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s made taboo to talk about mushroom spores or bees pollenating flowers because the process is too similar to something else. It’s far beyond erroneous.

@hamedsf you can say that again

@Arcangelo What? It’s not as nasty as we’ve been made to believe.

This is an underrated post. I like the idea of unblocking energy channels to become a magnet. I reckon I need to get back into a consistent yoga routine

The first one happened almost a year ago today. It was Halloween night and I was wearing a scary costume. When I hear someone say fuck head I think total belligerent, boundary disrespecting, non self aware, obnoxious asshole. But if instead you mean simply lacking social skills, the term loses all meaning due to the overwhelming and rapidly increasing amount of people who fit that description. That’s a shit load of fuck heads. So you were booted for lacking social skills? Who’s in the wrong if that’s the case? If you say it’s you, I fundamentally disagree. Completely agree First sentence yes. Second sentence not really. Im describing what happened exactly as it happened. I do feel victimized but I’m not trying to paint a special picture of it. I was being myself as much as I possibly could have been given the circumstances. Besides, how is it even possible to be anyone other than myself? I mean who else could I have been, Belle Delphine? Apparently all it takes is one person to dislike the self you present and boom, you’re gone. And yet you’ve only been booted from one joint? Please teach me your Jedi mind tricks. Correct. In their mind they’ve justified demonizing me so they don’t have to challenge their tiny paradigm locked reality bubbles. At least that’s how I see it. Why the hell would they be giving me flat out compliments if they were disgusted? Wouldn’t that just add fuel to the fire they’re trying to extinguish? “Dude, you are so weird. Get tf away from us! You do have a cute face though.” WTF Who does that? They clearly were not drunk. It’s not hard to tell. Imagine a world where it is forbidden to speak of the literal building blocks of all human life. That is hilariously absurd. It isn’t just that. I open with a wide variety of topics and more often than not it fails. Do I explicitly ask her what topics are and aren’t acceptable to talk about and bend the direction of the dialogue around that or should I have telepathic abilities so I can just automatically tell? I have nothing in common with most people. LOL! Maybe when we all get neuralinked that will be possible. It pisses me off that I have to learn to flawlessly execute my sets at the risk of being permanently labeled creepy if even the slightest error is made. Where is the open mindedness? Where is the goodness of the human spirit in this case? Incel culture is packed with delusion no doubt but they are right on some things. Most of the guys I see with girlfriends are tall and handsome, with a few exceptions of course. Connor Murphy the six foot four male model body builder gets tons of girls effortlessly even when he acts like a total nut case.

I don’t think it’s a guilt problem I have. More like the opposite, grudge problems. honored to be your 2000th post btw.

Fellas. I literally didn’t do a goddamn thing last night when a got removed. Nothing whatsoever. I was just standing there watching the crowd and trying to psych myself up for action. They suspected I was going to act weird based on my previous visits so that’s why. Even then my only crime was talking about subjects that fall outside the Overton Window. @aurum If by complete fuck head you mean guy trying to push his comfort zones, sure. I was still holding back 90% of what I would have liked to do/say but I guess even that wasn’t enough. Who’s the shady one if I wasn’t issued a single warning even though the staff was fully aware they could and should have? The least they could have done is extending me the courtesy of a three strike policy, but no, i was judged so harshly that ill intent was assumed of me until it was too late. Very much this. Especially the last part. She always seems to be in a bitchy mood so I imagine seeing a guy acting outside the norm was the perfect target to take it out on. I forgot to mention that when I moved to the next door bar, the owner from the first one came in and I started pushing her for answers as respectfully as I knew how. Naturally, this lit her fuse so her and some tweaker crackpot started double teaming me with raised voices and I got accused of being disrespectful for trying to stand up for myself. Mind you I stayed calm and collected throughout. Damn! This reeeealy makes me look like I’m trying to use the victim card and blame everyone else. But I’m just telling the story like it is. How else can I say it?

The only vibes I know are “Get the fuck away from me now” and “I’m enjoying this, keep talking.” Anything in between is like trying to solve advanced college calculus as a 3rd grader @Roy Thx. I think it’s more than just bad luck though because I’ve faced this same demon most of my life. If that’s true then how is it acceptable to have fear when approaching? RSD and even Leo says approach anxiety almost never goes away yet girls can still overlook it because they know the courage it takes. Not my experience at all

@PurpleTree Oh my god that’s hilarious!

One word. FEAR I would give absolutely anything to have my amygdala removed or permanently deactivated. I am far beyond sick and tired of being crippled by False Evidence Appearing Real.

In that case it looks like it’s time for him to give psychedelics a chance. It’s gonna be a hard sell because he’s always prided himself on not needing them because his mindset is already “trippy enough as it is” (paraphrasing) I predict he’ll end up taking the plunge at some point.

Sounds like you’re overdue for a dopamine detox

True. But I bet they fantasize about doing it just as much. They just don’t have the balls to actualize, literally. Girls are devilish to each other in HS.

He blames it on the fact that he only sleeps 3-4 hours a night