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Everything posted by Espaim

  1. Seriously, go to a doctor.
  2. Not using tools can make you waste a lot of time.
  3. Answer the 100 million dollars question and start working towards making it become true Read Leo's 5-star rated books from the book list Create a dream board Do meditation retreats Take low doses of psychedelics
  4. You said you took acid. I have taken both and mushrooms were for me the better tool for dealing with those negative emotions. I think I never "hated" life again like I used to after a 3g trip.
  5. Seeing through your own and others bullshit (to the deepest levels you dare to go) They can help you solve : Repressed emotions Traumas (or fears) Distorted metaphysics Bad habits And much more I think
  6. Are you including Datura and Krokodil in your "legal drugs" list?
  7. If you are a rapist, you thing it's right and should be legalized If you are a male Dolphin, the fuck it's totally right!! If you are an average human (IDK about other cultures like middle eastern or Amazon natives) you probably think it's wrong If you're the planet Jupiter, what the fuck is rape? So, why don't we take Jupiter's opinion on this matter? I'll assume you're a human and not a rapist. Well, well, what a coincidence that you don't think rape is right! I think it's wrong to put a gun to my head and to ask me to draw all my money from the bank (let's suppose I have something there...). The guy pointing a gun to me thinks it's totally right as he needs to buy drugs. I think I need this money to pay my dad's insurance. A monkey opinion on this matter is the fuck is money? I just need bananas Well, you could say "inanimate" objects or animals cannot have an opinion, or that you cannot have an opinion if you're not participating in the situation. All of those are also relative, because you're drawing a relative line between what is object and what is alive and who is participating and who is not. I think I already went too far on this deconstruction for a simple question so I'll stop here.
  8. @lostmedstudent To be honest I had only 3 mushroom trips so I just toughed it out. The hangover is like a mild anhedonia, so I imagine stimulants like Caffeine+L-Theanine 1:2 could give you a boost. I also found at a drug store Caffeine 100mg + 500mg Taurine. It's even better for me but this combo isn't as well spread around the supplements community.
  9. Wait it out. You already had your fun and insights. It's better to not take substances to overtake other substances' effect. Or just take some vitamins or nootropics. Smoked DMT has no hangover for me. The trip lasts 5 minutes and then I get around 50 minutes of a afterglow. Mushrooms give me a sort of hangover. It's not really nice. The day after LSD is pretty cool though. I feel very calm and content. Never tried any other psychedelic.
  10. I listen everything in one go even if the video is huge. Sometimes I pause just to think about what he suggested. Every video has a main ideia, that's what I want to get out of it. Sometimes I take notes, but that's rare. I rarely look back on my notes so there's no point in writing everything down. For a video to be a valuable tool for me I don't need to get every single bit of information drilled into my head. I just try to understand the main points. Sometimes I rewatch old videos and my understanding goes up.
  11. If you're going to have a first time alone outside and you're not confident in your ability to stay chill, then start very low. I mean 1/4 or even a microdose of the substance you want to take. Then go up. There's no rush here. You go slow, you get the results. You rush, you may get the results, but the chances of shit happening are exponetial. Be cocky and think you can handle anything, get your face hyperslapped.
  12. OP, if you wanna have a content life, you're not going to escape this. You have many beliefs are causing you to be unhappy. The good news is that you can drop them. The bad news is that you're going to need to do some questioning. And by questioning I mean you'll need to do some deep shit. Maybe work with a therapist or take low-dosage psychedelics. If you have access to any of those I would recommend you to make use of it. If you don't it would be good to work towards getting them. This isn't something we can solve for you in a forum post. I feel like that even if you got a girlfriend and got success in the relationships department but didn't work into those issues they're going to haunt you later. Of course, only do all of this work if you really do have a desire for change and happiness.
  13. Tattoo the thumbnail of this video
  14. Past experience 4 60ug trips 2 125ug trips 3 mushroom trips Several DMT trips. Dosage: 250ug LSD 95%+ purity ROA: Oral Everything I write right to the time stamp is the main part and the next paragraph is some tangent. "Insights" start at T+2:00. This is a rough estimate as I didn't write anything during the trip but I had a clock near me. 22/08/2020 8:20am T+0:00 So cocky me just decided to take LSD saturday morning without any purpose beforehand. I was going to take 60ug but I thought why not take 250ug? Then I can tell people what was my experience so that they should or not try it. poor me lol So I swallowed it and did some work for my dad. He has no problem with me taking LSD. I explained to him the addiction potential and he knows about my past of slight depression and low energy so he just lets me do it. He has taken mushrooms himself. T+0:30 It starts kicking in. Now I know I'm fucked lol. I was just chilling in my sofa and then the TV in my living room starts morphing. Holy shit. This usually happens 2 hours into the trip. Thoughts start to get warped and when I think something it seems like I evoke a web of interconnected concepts everytime I think of something. I saw that I have some negative connotations associated with the words "black" and "gay". Everytime I feel the sensation of my anus and it's pleasant it seems like I'm gay lol. I seemed to have accepted my sexuality several trips ago but now I'm not that sure. To be honest now I do think I have. I am pansexual. I thought I was pure heterossexual but after my first 125ug trip this melted away. I really love my gay friends company. It seems they are way more accepting than normal people. Regarding the word "black" it's not that I'm repulsed by it. It seems like when I think of this word it seems like to invoke the past experiences I saw of racism and I regard the bad feelings I feel when this happens. When I heard a black guy telling me about his experiences of racism I cried for some time. Never saw this subject the same. T+1:30 Things start morphing even harder. Ego starts to get crushed right here. Then bam, oneness. I start crying when I see the absolute beauty of reality. I don't remember much from now on regarding timeframes. T+2:00?-5:00 I got really a huge memory wipe from T+1:30 to T+5:00 into the trip and I don't remember everything. I did get all the biggest insights here in this part though. I am God. God incarnated as this human being to experience reality, to explore itself and to know itself through me. Without an observer it wouldn't be possible to see reality. I still don't know why this is necessary. I create reality as I live. This is a dream I have woken up during the trip. The same way I wake up from a dream at night, I woke up from the already waken dream. Everything = Nothing. Everything is made out of nothing. It's not possible everything to be made out of something like a atom or quark or a final particle because that would cause an infinite regression. So the rock bottom is that the building blocks of reality are nothing. Corollary 1: All sensations I feel are interpreted by the filter we call brain to be a sight, sound, touch or smell. We could totally possibly aswell see sounds or hear colors and this be a totally normal way of living. It just seems that for the purposes of survival this current mechanism works. Corollary 2: I don't remember but if I do will add it here haha Oneness. There's no difference between anything compared to anything. I am creating distinctions for the purpose of survival all the time. There's no difference between my mom and my dad, me and a rapist, me and my computer screen, me and a musical note, a monkey and a highway. They're all consciousness. I AM. That's it. Absolute subjectivity. There's nothing behind what I'm seeing. There's no higher truth in the sense that I can't have access to what's true. In the sense of subjective vs objective. Love. All I ever wanted is love all the time. It seems that all my actions were pointed into getting love. When I got to this moment in my trip it seems like there's nothing more to do, it's finished. Welcome, my little human child to the hands of God. It's impossible to die as there was never someone born to begin with. Being born and dying is an illusion. Reality is a Fractal. It's possible to zoom in and out infinitely. It's just that our human eyes cannot do this but we can see this through microscopes and telescopes. Still, it's possible to go even further into all directions. Everything is Perfect the way it is. I did get many more insights but I just cannot remember even if I strain myself to the max. There were some moments were I was in my living room and another moment I was seated outside my house. There was several moments where I ceased existing and then came back. Several thought loops happened and in some part of the trip I thought of killing myself. Luckily I got myself out of that. T+5:00 After all this mindfuck my blood pressure was at 160/60 maybe even more and I actually felt like I was dying. I needed to take several pills of propranolol and my BP still didn't go down for the whole day almost. T+6:00 I went and just sat next to my garden looking at the sky and meditated for a little bit. So the comedown was just me trying to not lose my shit and run into the streets naked. The day after: It seems like I have changed in some way. Thinking of some things wasn't appealing to me. Some of the addictions I had don't even cross my mind like scrolling infinitely through Reddit or eating junk food. I don't even know if I want to keep going into Enlightenment or Self-development anymore to be honest. ------------------------------------- I don't recommend people going from 125ug to 250ug right away like I did. It increased in strength exponencially. It seemed like 3x the strength of 125ug. All of my LSD trips were from the same batch. To be honest I'm pretty sensitive already to psychedelics and this was a dumb move.
  15. Sorry, I don't get it. Did he just equated post-modernism with Nazism? Jaw drop
  16. High quality advice being ignored right here Put fans behind fans from the window till it reaches you Put the fans on the ground facing up so the cold air goes to the top and falls on you - this is legit If you can't afford an AC then you gotta get some fans bro
  17. I am usually too slow to notice when I've been hurt but when I do I tell the person right away. "I was trying to do x to help you and you told me y now I feel z" "I told you x to show x but you understand z now I feel t" If they aren't willing to understand I start to ignore the person until they get the message. Not like I want them to apologize, I send love and forgive them no matter what happens but I stop talking to them as I don't like to do the same thing (talking to the person) and expect different results. And people here are totally in with the projection thing. If a person tried to hurt you it's not actually that they're trying to do. They only have access to their own world so they are reacting to an image and trying to defend it. How people act towards you talks much more about the way they are than the way you are.
  18. It seems like you have a bunch of limiting beliefs and you're clinging to them despite people telling you otherwise. How many approaches have you made in total? Online doesn't count! Do you think every good looking guy has it easier than you? Do you think it's necessary to have a partner to feel happy? Can you count how many men you know who are "ugly" and have partners?
  19. Psychedelics can solve so so much misunderstanding it's incredible
  20. I always feel like I'm a monkey hahaha A nice start Good luck!
  21. @Artsu
  22. To be honest I only feel high on DMT. It's an instant ego death and there's some closed eye visuals but for me it's hard to inquire or do anything else. When I think about the trip afterwards it's hard to remember anything. I have seen some entities that healed me and some cool things though. When I combined it with weed I could do some inquiring and that was the strongest trip ever. I had some great insights into the nature of thoughts but I cannot remember anything
  23. Only if I found a source I can get the weirdest shit types of drugs but no 5-MeO @Nahm @StripedGiraffe
  24. Studying logic in high school and then trying to apply it to religion No doubt I went full atheistic after that Mind you I was the type of guy that read the Bible and prayed everyday.