reves

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  1. Trip-Report - Beingness Medicine: 25 mg of 4-HO-MET (metocin) dissolved in water. As always, I made all the preparations and had a banana for breakfast. I then drank the metocin. I did not find to taste so disgusting as 4-AcO-DMT (at least the batch I have). I started listening to some music, but I quickly changed to Tibetan signing bowls and found that more suitable and the trip started to feel like a meditation session. After 30 minutes I started to feel the effects. I found the come-up very soft and in general I found this psychedelic very gentle. This made me think that it could be a nice psychedelic for beginners. But then again, this maybe just my experience, so be very careful if you want to try it, this is the second time I take 4-HO-MET, the first one I did 12 mg, and it was a similar experience. Perhaps the only thing that I did not like was that I got a huge headache during the come-down phase, about eight to nine hours after I took the psychedelic. I drank multiple cups of ginger tea during the trip, but apparently it was not enough. Next time I will try to drink more water and see how it goes. I also found funny that with this psychedelic I found it easier to talk as to write, so I ended up recording notes instead of writing them. After the come-up I realized that I wanted to get distracted with my mobile phone, so I put it away and also wore some earplugs. This allowed me to contemplate better and do not get so distracted. I was in the living room where I have some plants and felt a deep connection with them. Later I felt so drawn to nature, so I went out for a hike in the forest and had a very delightful experience. There was a moment when I felt drawn to just sit and meditate, so I did this and I started to feel very joyful and peaceful, in a higher state of Beingness. It was as if the higher Self/God was showing me how to Be. I had a lot of realizations about Being, how primordial it is, how with every new generation we forget more and more just how to Be. I realized that I am always in this planning-mode, trying to define what am I going to do next, like in a short time-horizon that goes from minutes to a couple of years and because of this cannot Be. It is as if we are going from human beings to human doings. And something told me that it is not just because of our technological development, but that there are also deeper forces driving us in this direction. This was like the main theme of the trip, remember how to let go and just Be, pure Isness. Later, as I was laying on contemplating this higher order Beingess, I had this sort of Samadhi experience. This is something that I have been experiencing during some trips and also once while doing Kriya Yoga. It is like if the boundaries of my body would collapse and I feel I would merge with the Absolute, it also feels as if I would elevate out just a few centimeters out of the body. The first time I experienced this I was very shocked and perplexed by the experience, but this time it was by far the most lasting and clear I have ever felt. They also happen by surprise. Also, during these experiences it is as I get glimpses of the Truth, but it fades away very quickly. The moment I realized I was aware of something of higher order it just disappeared, very slippery. To my surprise, the next day @Leo Gura published the video "How To Discover What's True - A Deep Inquiry" and his metaphor of the long corridor and the tail, brought the memory of these experiences. This was a great trip, I will definitively try this psychedelics more times, so far I found it very interesting.
  2. Hi there! In this journal I share some my experiences as I go through the self-actualization process, like psychedelic experiences, nootropics, meditation, kriya yoga and in general, experiences that I may want to share as I go in my journey through the Self. Please feel free to comment. Here are the trip-reports I have written until now:
  3. This one ++++1 This, the more I do the work, the more I ask myself if I should drop everything and become some sort of monk. Maybe the same in different words: How to deal with survival when pursuing the Truth? How to achieve a balance between basic survival stuff (making money, sustaining a career) and spiritual / enlightenment work? And some more: How to integrate deep mystical experiences into daily life? How to share the profound knowledge we get as we are doing the work (meditation, psychedelic tripping, contemplation etc..) with family and friends? How do we deal with family and friends as we get deeper in the self-actualization path? One way may be to cut al relationships, but are there other possibilities to integrate them? I invested a lot in my current career and it has help me to achieve great things in life, but I seem to feel more and more stuck and lose interest on it the more I self-actualize. Shall I change my career? Or shall I drop it and start something new? (I see that this can be related to the life purpose course, but who knows, I found it worth asking)
  4. Hi there! When I do LSD (usually 100 to 200 ug) I prepare some food and my house and take some magnesium to reduce the body load I get with LSD. I try to start as early as I can, I take the psychedelic on an empty stomach and then do Kriya Yoga usually for 45 minutes or so, until I start to feel the effects of the medicine. I then drink a meal supplement drink and lay down on the ground or bed, depending on the weather. I will stay like that, until I have to pee or the body load is to strong that I have to move around, maybe I will do some Hatha Yoga to reduce the soreness. I also like to drink ginger tea during the trip. If I get some deep realization, I try to write it down or record myself, sometimes just a sentence or a just word will do the trick, so I can remember later and try to describe in more detail. I will do this during the first six hours or so, which are the most intense for me during the trip. After that my ego-self will start to reassemble, and I will get hungry, so I try to eat some of the food I prepared. I also love to listen to music later during the trip, specially when I do LSD, so I have a playlist that I have been curating with time specially for this occasions. Sometimes I get the need to share the experience with others and find it great to talk with my girlfriend, or maybe I will call family or friends. I also feel specially drawn to nature when I do psychedelics, and as I live very close to the forest, I usually finish my trip with a long walk. Later I try to write the realizations in more detail, do Kriya Yoga again and sit down to meditate before I go to bed.
  5. Hi there! Thanks for sharing your experience. Sounds like you are try to go to fast. Going from 100 to 225 ug in my experience is a lot! I haven't tried 5-MeO-DMT yet, but from what I have read, it will also increase the potency of all the psychedelics you use after. I had some similar very hard trips on 4-AcO-DMT, and I learnt that the dose was to high for me. I also had this feeling that I was really going to physically die. But after working on integrating these trips I have managed to trip again and go deeper in the process. So, yes it would be wise to work on integrating this hard experience before you plan to trip again!
  6. @kira Nothing special, just sitting and following the breath, concentration training, and sometimes listening to tibetan singing bowls.
  7. I haven’t had such an experience yet, however I have read some reports that Stanislav Grof share from some of his patients and students in LSD: Doorway to the Numinous: The Groundbreaking Psychedelic Research into Realms of the Human Unconscious So, it may be possible.
  8. For me Instagram is the new Facebook. I was an early user and it was fun to make photos and share them online, to do creative stuff. But nowadays it is full of ads, the timeline is broken and in general low consciousness stuff. I also find it very addictive.
  9. In my experience, weed made me only paranoid and I became addicted to it, I wanted to do everything high on weed. However, I recently tried a full spectrum cannabis oil and it has all the good qualities I always wanted to have from weed, without the high, paranoia effects and no risk to overload the lungs by smoking it to often. Maybe this is what you are looking for.
  10. @kira yes it can be overwhelming at the beginning. Maybe try to find a balance trying not to rush and just to keep a good progress, if it stops being fun and interesting, it is a sing a sing that maybe you have to change something. I started doing Kriya at the beginning of the year and I have reached a point where I can do it two times a day around 36-48 KPs. So I am not that experienced as others maybe but I can now do it much more but combining it with meditation and psychedelics has brought me some profound mystical experiences. So have fun and good luck!
  11. @kira Hi there, I think there is not just one way to do it, nor that you should care to much on the details. It was also harder for me on the beginning but with time and practice you will master it. The first book that Leo recommended clarifies and makes you follow a slower and maybe easier learning path. Just listen to your hearth, some days I don't chant Om on every Chakra and some days I do it. Most of the time I do it like the first explanation you give, stop on each Chakra for two to three seconds, feel it and chant Om and then continue to the next one. I try to do this as mindfully as I can. Hope it helps!
  12. @John876 Thanks! @Girzo Interesting, I may give it a try sooner!
  13. Medicine: 150 ug 1P-LSD Intention: Contemplate How am I God, Infinite, Love? And retain more insights after the trip. Background Before this trip I had a very difficult experience with 4-AcO-DMT, so I decided to take some time to understand what I was going through and integrate better integrate the previous trips. I dedicated myself as well to read some books from Stanislav Grof and James Fadiman to understand more about LSD and other well known psychedelics as well as some other books from Leo's book list about God and spirituality. I also worked on improving my Kriya Yoga techniques and have been observing my micro fears and contemplating how these fears are related to myself. Finally, I contacted a psychotherapist which helped me during some earlier hard phases of my life, because I started to get anxious with the psychedelic trips and some personal stuff started to come during the trips, which I was not being able to integrate alone. The Trip Made all the preparations and took the LSD around 8:00 am, after that I made Kriya Yoga, I managed to get to 30 minutes but I started to feel the effects of the medicine and started to feel a little dizzy. I find interesting that the peaceful and after glow of Kriya some how merged with the effect of the LSD. I also made some Hatha Yoga because the LSD gets me some muscle soreness, and I have realized that Hatha Yoga helps me relax the body and allows the energy to flow better. I then laid down as the effects of the medicine were getting stronger, and started to ask me how am I God? I also started to become aware of the rapid movements of my ego mind and I managed to calm it down. And the I had this very deep insight about Nothingness, it was a very profound insight but I will try my best to describe it. I realized all the limitations that make me believe that I am a person, and realized that I had to overcome them in order to become God. As I realized this I had this vision of my body being fully surrounded by white energy and how all the limitations simply disappeared. And then I became Nothingness, I don't really know how long I stayed in this state as time had no meaning there. It was like if I was in the Void, there was no difference, it was Absolute Nothingness. Later I went to see how many time had passed since I first laid down and I spent at least two hours there. And suddenly I see how I decide to go back to the form and create myself as a tough and as this happens I have this vision that the Nothingness merges again with the white energy of Love like a multidimensional living Yin Yang and it creates a strange loop and I become this strange loop. As I realize the insight I sit there completely shocked and I see how my mind tries to wrap around and make an idea of it which is impossible. I tried to write about the experience and it came to my mind that is impossible to describe Infinity with something finite as words. Nevertheless there are some moments of great inspiration I feel during the trips, here is something I wrote down and I wanted to share: "It is as if God could talk me through music, thoughts, light, in all the many dimensions of the Self and It manages to do it so overwhelmingly good that It leaves me breathless". I became a little agitated because of the magnitude of this insight, so I started to walk around in the apartment and later made some more Hatha Yoga. It felt as if I was a puppet being shown how to make the Yoga positions. I wanted to lay down again and I realized that my ego-self didn't wanted me to do it and became agitated. I realized that I was also contracting my body and opened-up and started to make bilateral symmetrical movements and I managed to calm down. I am really amazed how easy is this technique and yet how helpful it is in such cases. I managed to calm down and relax, I wore some earplugs and tried to be as still as I could. I had one of this Samadhi experiences I have been having with the psychedelic trips. As I relaxed the mind, the limits of my body cease to exist and I literally feel I have no limits, during that moment also experience a lot of Love and it feels as I would elevate and leave my body. I guess that this is the sort of experiences that yogis get after many years of practice. There was also a moment when I felt I could remember who I truly am, not as my ego-self but as the higher Self. I could feel I was Infinite, Infinite Love, Eternal. It was just Awesome! I also realized that there is no such thing as a reference point and that everything is relative, except for the Absolute. As I got this realization I started to feel disoriented and fearful, my body wanted to close again but I managed to remain open, make some bilateral movements, so I could accept the insight and continue tripping. There was also a moment when I was at the kitchen and started looking at a mango, I became fascinated with its different colors and textures and at some point I realized that by concentrating myself on the mango I became the mango haha, I just don't know how to put this in words but it felt like that. At the end of the trip I started listening some music, something I have learned to enjoy specially when I do LSD, and there were some moments that I feel I become the musician playing the instrument and the music. I then went for a walk in to the forest, I felt drawn into the nature, part of me wanted to see the and be part of nature, so I spent a couple of hours walking and flowing with the constant changes of the wind, captivated by the fractal forms of some plants and the beauty of nature, looking the awesome colors of the leaves now that the fall begins here in Europe. Conclusions I felt I had a much more organic trip, as in my previous trips I could not remain so conscious of all the insights I got. I see that working on my fears have helped me go deeper during the trips. There where some moments where I felt I was drawing towards madness, but I saw that the only way I could get over my fears is to face them and that it is a long and slow process. I was reluctant and skeptic to contact the psychotherapist but working on some more personal stuff that has came up during the some previous experiences also allowed me to go deeper during this trip. But then again, it is a therapist that I have known for years, which could accept the idea of me working with psychedelics (even though she may not recommend it or like them) and someone I can also trust. Bilateral symmetry and remaining open is a great technique to avoid getting into anxious during the trip, at least it works for me and I cannot recommend it enough. Something I don't like about 1P-LSD is the muscle soreness and body load it generates, but I could counteract some of it by doing Hatha Yoga, something that may be manageable at least in lower to moderate doses where it is still possible to move around. When I started working with psychedelics at the beginning of the year I was afraid I would not be able to this with my girlfriend around and that it may even cause is trouble, but to my surprise it has been the complete opposite. I have learned to understand her better and to get closer in our relationship. Thanks a lot for reading this and for your comments! Thanks to the great community of Actualized.org and to Leo for his great teachings!
  14. @Leo Gura So far I have tried 1P-LSD, and some mushroom analogues 4-AcO-DMT and 4-HO-MET and I still like 1P-LSD the most. I don't consider myself yet ready for something more powerful like 5-MeO-DMT or DPT, which I plan to try next year. Would you recommend me anything else? Thanks a lot!
  15. Drink lots of water! I like to meditate after I take the psychedelic, and maybe listen to some music until I start to feel the effects and maybe later when the effects are almost gone. I also like to go out for a walk in the forest after 6-9 I took the medicine and the peak is long gone. I wouldn’t watch any videos, but that’s just me. Have fun and let us know how it goes
  16. I did something similar with a good old friend of mine back in June. He has already had some experiences with mushrooms and he wanted to try LSD. So he took 150 and I did 100 ug. His place is rather small so we sat on the living room, it was a nice, funny sort of “introductory” trip, but I neither of both could concentrate and go deep into the trip. I only did it because he is an old friend, but it is not something I will repeat. If I could repeat it, i would take a lesser dose, 50-25 ug if any. On another occasion another my girlfriend wanted to try mushrooms, and she tried lower dose (~15 mg). I was there with here at the beginning, just to go with her through the initial come-up phase. After 20 min or so that she took the medicine, she decided to lay down. As she went into another room, I told her that I was there for her if she needed anything. Later the told me that she had a very nice experience and that the mushrooms had showed her many things. As she was tripping I made some Kriya Yoga and had a very powerful experience, during the final concentration phase I felt that the limits of my body where gone and I went to a place where time does not exists. Even though it only lasted mere seconds, it also happened very suddenly and took me by surprise. I hope it helps! Be safe and have fun!
  17. @lmfao lesson 24 - basic walking techniques. I like the “So Hum” technique, very easy to follow and yet very powerful.
  18. @Shakazulu There is no easy way to do it, just do it as long as you can. Concentrate on each Chakra like laser. It helps me to chant mentally Om while I concentrate on each Chakra.
  19. Awesome, thanks for sharing!
  20. You can also read trip-reports as preparation and this video from Leo: https://actualized.org/articles/how-to-use-psychedelics-for-personal-development. Drink lots of water, this is very important. Start with a low dose, you can always try higher doses later when you get more experience with psychedelics. With LSD I get body soreness, so I take magnesium before taking the medicine, this helps me a lot. I also drink ginger tea and helps me reduce nausea effects. Have fun and let us know how it went!
  21. Hi there!, I hold the breath at bindu for 3-4 seconds. The inhalation is about 10-15 seconds. Well it became harder to concentrate on each Chakra. Also, prior to the KP2 I do 18 KP1 cycles. I guess I have work more on my breathing technique.