Zigzag Idiot

I had a great father. He was hard driven but possessed a great amount of patience. He took us Snow Sking in Colorado 4 times when I was growing up. Sitting up or curled up in the fetal position in the backseat of the car riding across the high plains was memorable in itself. My mothers AbbA 8 track periodically playing through the speakers filled my head with them. That's how that got started. Music affects me deeply. In the ski rental shop, I heard Billy Joel's song You May Be Right playing for the first time on our 1980 trip. Our first ski trip out west was when I was in second grade. From then on, Colorado represented heaven for me. Kinda still does,,,,

@Destiny Enduring more than one season of being suicidal grew me more in terms of empathy towards others than lsd trips and book reading put together x 10. With most of my episodes, because of the sense of deficienct emptiness, a certain selfishness was naturally built into it. Or rather I had to deal with aspects in myself where the line was blurred between what is selfish and what is not. I was dealing with severe depression and anxiety. This compounded the stickiness of it, in so far as getting free of it because guilt was constantly returning. I know everyone's situation is different. Hope you discover an inroad and strategy that brings you some peace,,,,,,

3-27-2019 I Ching reading hexagram 8 lines 2,4,5,6 hexagram 64 I seem more inclined to make comments regarding I CHING reading towards the end of the day. This is just a site page I just chose at random that gives hexagram meanings. https://cafeausoul.com/iching/hexagram-detail-pages

A contemporary paraphrasing of the Shobogenzo. I found it to be the most difficult of all of Warners books. Dogen actually expounded quite a bit on how Monks should wipe their butt. Why is this relevant? Warner has a lot of insights into Dogen and the extremely difficult text of the Shobogenzo. He also knows the value of humor.

From page 65 in the commentary on hexagram 1; Using words that have no basis in Cosmic Harmony creates demonic consciousness. Among such words are the following: guilt, culprit (evildoer), power, and unconditional love. ,,,,guilt is a permanent stain imagined by human beings Elsewhere it states the the Universe itself is made of love. It goes on to state that holding unconditional love as a standard to live by is a sure way to have our life force used up on whims of others egos. My wording. There is no evil, only ignorance.

It's verifyable that on the level of personality, there is a definite tendency to project ones shadow onto others and so not claim it in oneself. There seems to be layers of depth to this. Its common to be annoyed or to even hate others who closely share our own chief feature (blindspot) to an extent. Shadow material which is repressed, needs to have the light of Consciousness reveal and heal. I catch a glimpse of being a know-it-all and then I overcompensate into false humility. Like a Zigzag Idiot who has five Friday's in a week. I think quite a few people who are exposed to the idea of everyone having a psychological blindspot immediately has personal experiences which come to mind on the surface of this subject. I've had a realization about bringing up issues like projection, imagination, lying, self deception, self importance, spiritual egotism, false personality, It provokes some people but not others. I still catch my ego projecting in different ways. I think everyone psychologically projects onto there's. It's everywhere. Even so called awakened or enlightened people seem to do it to some extent. If nothing else, we project labels onto people. Or find a way to categorize them in semiconscious ways.

It's effective for many to just turn on the news and watch just about anything related to politics. ?

3/26 reading 1'st hexagram 14 line 1 2nd hexagram 1

Heaven and hell sounds like it would go good with a little ketchup ??‍?

I've been intrigued by the idea of the helpers moreso than the Sage. An uplifting idea from the Oracle that one can free an army of helpers to assist us when we are balanced and in harmony with the Cosmos. This is from a previous post in my Journal; ,,,,,,,,,when the heart is awakened and purified. Looking at the Cosmos through the I-CHING. This same inner process allows assistance from the "helpers" who are defined as individualized aspects of the Cosmic Consciousness and of nature that are neither humans nor Angels. Carol Anthony claimed that divination revealed to her that the identity of the "helpers" are what's known today as the phenomenon of "Orbs". Activation of the helpers can only happen when we are in harmony with the Cosmos. In that sense, subservience is just as detrimental as arrogance. The helpers are activated by one's contact with the harmony of the inner truth of one's True Self. Returning to the vocabulary of Esoteric Christianity, I correlate this harmony as one being in contact with awakened Conscience. This short article may be helpful if anyone is following along; Article 1. The Sage as our Cosmic Teacher by Carol and Hanna © by Carol Anthony and Hanna Moog Carol’s experience of the Sage in the 1970’s was of an alive consciousness that wants to communicate with us. This took away for her the understanding that what we read in the written text of the book, is all we have for an oracle. It becomes apparent through its use that the I Ching is a Cosmic gift to humans. Its purpose is show people (1) the nature of the Cosmos as a system of Principles of Harmony, (2) our true human nature, and (3) the way we individually can return to harmony with these Cosmic Principles when we have lost our way. The Sage, as part of this interaction, is a presence within us that uses the oracle to draw up from the depths of our nature, our innate knowledge of Cosmic truth. (This truth is contained in the DNA of every body cell.) The I Ching Hexagram 61, titled “Inner Truth,” refers to this source that is stored in our bodies, not in words, but in the form of feelings of what is harmonious and what is not. Thus, the Sage uses the I Ching to speak through its text, but the text itself is not the oracle. The Sage makes it clear, through the method we call the retrospective-three-coin-method, or “rtcm” (which will be described in our next article), that it does not teach us the handed down platitudes that have often been taken as ‘ancient wisdom.’ It rather discourages this kind of memorized mental approach by reaching into our own deepest inner truth to bring forth the answers that are already there. We find, in so doing, that our inner truth has been suppressed in favor of these platitudes and commandments. That is why, on finding the answer we need, we recognize that we “knew that” all along, but did not dare to trust it. Thus, we find that the Sage is all the time connecting us with a part of ourselves that has been repressed through conditioning. This process of reaching into the depths is described in Hexagram 48, “The Well,” which calls our inner truth “a clear, cold spring from which one can drink.” Often, we cannot access our inner truth because “there is mud in the well” in the form of fixed, preconceived ideas, fears, old grievances, and memories of wrongs done to us. When we drink from this mud, we are kept stalling. With the help of the I Ching text, the Sage not only wants to make us aware of this fact, it also offers us help to cleanse our inner well. Then we find that our inner truth is a gold mine containing everything we need to know. The more we work with the Sage and give it the necessary space in our mind, the more we realize that it wants to speak to us as a friend, not as a godlike figure that expects obeisance and punishes us when we make mistakes. On the contrary, the Sage wants to free us from ideas that are either grandiose, making us see ourselves as the center of the universe, or that inspire us with fear and awe, and make us see ourselves as small and insignificant. The ancient Greeks had an idea of the Sage when they spoke of “a tutelary spirit that accompanies each person lifelong.” They named it “genii,” root of the word “genius.” Writers have long called it “the muse.” For many artists, athletes, and inventors, it is an “elusive thing” that takes over in us when we give up relying on the “brilliance and ability of the thinking mind,” or the pure brawn of our bodies, to provide the success we seek.

I'm going to ponder if bunnyfishsquid may be related to manbearpig.

Kundabuffer is a word created by Gurdjieff in Beelzebub's Tales To His Grandson associated with imagination fueled by Kundalini energy. Its what Rumi would describe as what causes a person to get all 'big eyed' while talking spiritual matters with others. ?? ??‍♂️?

It would probably be better if I didn't post to the forum until after Morning Centering Prayer. My capacity for skillful means can suck when I'm not fully awake from a nights sleep.

Chi = Kundalini = Prana = Kundabuffer = imagination Chi = Kundalini + 3 Centered Awareness = Holy Prana

Yes Good way to put it.

Belief is imagination propped up by mechanical associations in the mind/brain. Example: I believe the fate of the world rests on the outcome of a game of checkers between Butters and Lindsay Buckingham. Anything goes when it comes to belief.

Theres a lot of complexity to the third eye and a lot I'm not in full understanding of all of it. What I'm more certain of is that Kundalini has to be grounded through sensation in the body and balanced with thinking and feeling. If not it can become motor fuel for imagination.

I don't understand two third eyes. ?

Ajgna is third eye. Home of the intuition. Connected with the pituitary gland. Kundalini activates it but only if one stays grounded in the body. If Kundalini is not grounded, it is just motor fuel for imagination. Activation of the third eye is subtle. A slight but distinct pressure or throb is usually felt in the forehead. Just waking up, my communication style is Forest Gump Gnosticism.

@tsuki I didn't realize English wasn't your primary language. You do damn good. I can't imagine taking on a second language. I like her use of the the term collective ego. I had forgotten Eckart Tolle using it in his book The New Earth. I was hooked into Leo's teaching in a fresh way when I saw he had made a video on the Collective ego. Im glad to read about your wife making a connection with the Oracle. It's definitely transrational and I would say also transpersonal, in a sense, when considering it from the perspective of the Review on the back cover. It says so much in just one sentence, I've gotten a lot out of rereading it on occasion and pondering it. Removing the Ego as the defining agent of reality releases awareness to reinhabit the natural world. --Jose Cedillos, Ph.D. Prof. of Consciousness and Creativity Studies, The Union Institute.

Being guilty is actually a false, hollow concept with no basis in Objective reality. But in connection with our human experience my two cents are: Truly experience remorse of Conscience. Practice not judging others. Practice forgiveness.

My aim wasn't simply flattery. Your comments naturally brought the comparisons to mind. As someone who tends to think abstractly and has grown to appreciate a Chaotic approach, I feel like a walking contradiction being a Virgo, who are supposed to have a high tendency for perfectionism.

About to head out the door and realized I didn't record my Morning I Ching reading. Hexagram 51 Shock; line 5 and then hexagram 17 Self Remembering is key today.

My mother made me take piano lessons when I was little for about 4 years. There was a time when I was 10 - 12 years old that I was obsessed with the rock group ABBA. Although I really liked Bjorn's name, I couldn't decide weather I wanted to be Bjorn or Benny. I constantly daydreamed about Jetsetting around the world as a part of this European rock group landing in a helicopter often among screaming fans jumping up and down. I was just lovesick about it. For this to never become a reality was just too horrible to think about. I wanted it so bad I thought I would fucking die.

With regards to the Fourth Way usage of the term Inner or Internal considering, this video of Leo's is the most relevant one I've seen so far. I found it last night and am only half way through it but it is really, really good! "I am completely independent of the good or bad opinions of others".