Zigzag Idiot

Me too. Great post! True seeing and wisdom on many issues. IME Theres a saying I've heard that's associated with Inquiry and work on oneself -- "For a long time the ability to see, will be far ahead of ones capacity to do." Being more awake can be painful. Like with not going into self criticism at some point in Inquiry. I watched myself fail 100% with that one for a long time. My experience with Inquiry and work on self has been one of layers..I find peace with myself when I forgive others for some tendency of my own which I see in them and has been for the most part, in my blindspot. Owning up to my own negativity can help me to overlook it in others which helps it to heal in myself. Less shadow.

Oops,, Yesterday 5-7-2019 57 The Penetrating Lines 1 and 6 5. Waiting 5-8-2019 5. Waiting line 3 60 Limitation/Self-Limitation Today the changing line gives council in regard to the effects of making certain types of projections which result in putting a spell on others which then has further consequences. A lot of my actions seem to be the equivalent of picking out the cleanest shirt in the dirty clothes pile.

Regarding - Feeling depressed after Awakening “A man may be born, but in order to be born he must first die, and in order to die he must first awake.” – George Gurdjieff A memory came up yesterday of a few years ago during a time of existential suffering and dread. I had heard Terrence McKenna use the phrase "Rome falls nine times an hour". To me this perfectly describes the angst, confusion and unsettledness that always seems to return just before a deeper realization occurs. It seems to me that there are many times that one goes through the process of awakening, dying to yet something else and then rebirth.

This that we have now

I miss my old Camero I sold for $600 at a low period in the late 80's.

@Thittato It's uplifting to read your Journal. With your success and enrichment with the intense chess hobby and your yoga practice blossoming, you seem to be entering states of flow. ??‍♂️?

@Alex bAlex The above diagram is just referencing 4 different states of consciousness. Human #1, #2, and #3 who are all operating out of a dominance of one of the three centers -- instinctual/moving, feeling, or Intellectual are all asleep. When the centers start coming into balance, they become human #4 (balanced human) and start experiencing true compassion, brief periods of Self Remembering and Witness Consciousness, and tastes of higher states. Human #5 is in a steady existence of 3 Centered Awareness and is starting to become paranormal with heightened intuition moving into a capacity for clairvoyance with opening of third eye.

Inquiry as I understand it includes both self Observation and Self Remembering 2nd state; aka -- Autopilot Itoklanoz Awareness 3rd state ; aka --3 Centered Awareness, 3 Centered knowing, Self Remembering Fulasnitamnian Awareness What is Self Remembering Rupert Spira https://non-duality.rupertspira.com/read/what_is_selfremembering_200

Two completely different categories of Prayer-- Petitionary Prayer Contemplative Prayer

Thanks, I'll check it out. Martin Butler repeats what he describes as a kind of horrible quote- -- "Those who matter, don't complain. Those who complain, don't matter. To me this says, feel everything, but don't become a Lunar-tic.

5-6-2019 27 Nourishing. Lines 2, 3, and 4 14. Possession in Great Measure My I pad became sick and disconnected for a couple days coinciding with the site having troubles. I've got a lot of catch up reading to do. Pressed on time this morning. Pondering my changing lines connected with Nourishing,,,,,

Immaterial Quintessence sounds like Essence with with its different qualities. What Almaas refers to as essential aspects Absorption of all Essential Aspects into the Personal Essence However, the pearl beyond price feels personal without being the personality. It has the capacity to make a personal contact with another human being and still be free, totally unconditioned, free from the past and its influences. It is the most personally intimate aspect of oneself. Everyone recognizes what it is when he first sees it. Sometimes even the vaguest perception of it brings out the exclamation “but this feels like me, intimately me.” And yet it is not selfish like the personality. The personality is based on deficiency, and this is the source of its selfishness. But the pearl is based on true value and true fullness. In fact, it is itself fullness. All of essential development is ultimately the development of the pearl. All of the essential aspects are for the pearl, for the life, use, enjoyment, and fulfillment of the pearl. That is why in the stories it is represented as a princess of unsurpassable beauty. The joy of the essence is its joy. The love is its love. The pleasure of the essence is for it, the majesty of the essence is its grandeur, the beauty of the essence is it, itself. The whole quest—its meaning, purpose, and completion—can be understood as the realization of the pearl beyond price. Many stories have been written about it. Essence with the Elixir of Enlightenment, pg. 162 So the capacity to be without this ego sense of self eliminates selectivity in one’s personal experience of essential qualities, opening the consciousness to an unlimited range of qualities. The absence of inner selectivity due to cessation of the feeling of self, coupled with the openness to expansion due to disidentincation from ego inadequacy, allows a new possibility of realization. It makes it possible to complete the process of personalization of Essence, which is the absorption of all essential aspects into the Personal Essence, or the synthesis of all aspects into a personal presence. The essential aspects now constitute the very substance of the Personal Essence. One not only feels one is a full personal presence, but that this very same presence includes the presence of Love, Joy, Strength, Compassion, Merging, Peace, Intelligence, Will, Consciousness, etc. Aspects are simultaneously personalized, with their capacities and functions integrated. This is a condition of completeness, of an amazing degree of integration. One is full and firm, strong and soft, sweet and warm, and so on. One is a complete person. This does not mean that one’s personal presence from now on is always this complete state. It indicates that one is able to be present in this expanded state of Being. The Personal Essence is an organic and fluid presence; there is no rigidity in it at all. All its states, through the whole process of its realization and development, are available to it now, manifesting according to the situation. Practically, this realization allows the capacity to be personal in any of the essential aspects, or any combination of them, depending on the demands of the situation. The complete state of the Personal Essence brings a perception of one’s presence as preciousness, beauty and regality. It is no wonder that the Personal Essence is called in some stories, the Princess Precious Pearl. Pearl Beyond Price, pg. 391

Bumper sticker in the 1990's was right on --- Shit happens One hurdle at this point in my experience is not becoming identified and falling back into sleep.

I forgot to record yesterday's reading 5-3-2019 59 Dissolution/Disolving. Lines 5 and 6 7 The Army 5-4-2019 32. Duration Lines 2,3,5 and 6 12. Being Halted Lots of material in the changing lines in this reading. Cautions about a number of things including --- being overwhelmed by wallowing in doubt faith based on hope self blame by going along with the parallel world of the collective ego restlessness and acting impulsive

@jbram2002 I started the Teal Swan video and,,,, yeah, me too! So I'm watching it now.

? Short Answer -- To develop the capacity for "objectless awareness." Use of a sacred word with the Centering Prayer technique,,,, every thought gets let go of,,, practicing kenosis,,,, Long answer -- Brilliant explainer Cynthia Bourgeault giving a talk at a SAND conference. She's a long time student of the Gurdjieff Work, has a Phd, and is one of the first women ordained as an Episcopal Priest. So in a way I see her as a current day Alan Watts. 26 minutes

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My twice a day meditation is Centering Prayer. It helps me touch base with being an empty vessel and inner quiet. Sensing practice- Intermittently sensing the feet dusting the day helps reinforce this by staying grounded in the body. Mindfulness practice of collecting scattered attention is another one which I describe as cleaning and sealing the atmosphere of my luminous egg. The visualization helps in this. Helps with Impartiality and not getting distracted or reactive. Taken all together allows for insight to arrive when it's needed but I don't allow it during Centering Prayer. For me In Centering Prayer, even if a vision of Jesus appeared holding a out a golden key,,,, it would be, not now man, wait till I'm done.

I'm integrating my Colonel Kurtz with my Mr. Rogers.

@tsuki fascinating,,,very rich,,, I need to sit with it Wanted to bring it all forward. AOD Alphabet of Desire is a new one to me

@tsuki fascinating,,,very rich,,, I need to sit with it

I watched this video from the second link you shared. Good stuff and so true. It's really interesting how many forms of this exist among different spiritual traditions or approaches. It's a very important message and to me the actual process and reality of it is always more difficult than the description but I think with each new way of expressing how to sit with, open up and allowing, can initiate healing the shadow and possibly adds to opening up this morphogenetic field around the process. I may be stretching it to say there is a morphogenetic field around the process,,, but maybe not,,, it's movement towards the light anyhow. I almost immediately recognized a parallel with Almaas' Theory of holes in the Diamond Approach and the process of sitting with deficient emptiness in order to process and allow an essential state or quality to emerge. It can often be a very uncomfortable process but very much worth the effort.

Yes, it has begun speak to me some,,,? I may may be mixing two different phenomena with The Akashic Records and Gurdjieff's Korkaptilnian thought tapes. Years ago I read a good deal of what Edgar Cayce had to say about the Akashic Records. I've forgotten nearly everything.

I'm pasting Gurdjieff's version down below if you want to compare for any similarities. They are direct quotes from Beelzebub's Tales To His Grandson. As a side note: In the Tales the Earth is described as a Being with its own Astral body. This is more exactly where the Korkaptilnian thought tapes Akashic Records are, in the Kesdjan (Astral) body of the Earth. “A Teleoghinoora is a materialized idea or thought which after its arising exists almost eternally in the atmosphere of that planet on which it arises. 23.293 “Teleoghinooras can be formed from such a quality of being-contemplation as only those three-brained beings have and can actualize, who have coated their higher being bodies in their presences and who have brought the perfecting of the Reason of their higher being part up to the degree of the sacred ‘Martfotai.’ “And the sequential series of being-ideas, materialized in this way, concerning any given event, are called ‘Korkaptilnian thought tapes.’ 23.293 “It seems that the said Korkaptilnian thought tapes concerning the history of the arising of the learned society Akhaldan were, as I found out much later, deliberately fixed by a certain ‘Eternal Individual,’ Asoochilon, now a saint, who became coated in the common presence of a three-brained being named Tetetos who arose on your planet on the continent of Atlantis and who had existed there four centuries before the second great ‘Transapalnianperturbation.’ 23.293-4 “These Korkaptilnian thought tapes are never destroyed as long as the given planet exists, which is in what is called the ‘tempo of movement of the prime arising’; and they are subject to none of those transformations from any cosmic causes whatsoever to which all other cosmic substances and cosmic crystallizations are periodically subject. “And however long a time may have already passed, every three-brained being in whose presence there has been acquired the ability to enter into the being-state called ‘Soorptakalknian contemplation’ can perceive and cognize the texts of these Korkaptilnian thought tapes. From https://gurdjieff.org.gr/ae/terms/en50/0392.htm

@now is forever More pondering. I'll probably get it in a few hours. Actually , thought I almost had it. Then it slipped away.