ivory

@Elysian Well said.

I just ordered it! Although, the title isn't what I expected. "Mastering leadership" For some reason that just makes me think of capitalism.

@Elysian I get what you are saying but to be really precise, life is not about suffering. It's an undeniable, ever-present aspect of life. In all of life, there is suffering. Examples include old age, sickness, pain, etc. I'm not saying that suffering should be avoided, but there are ways we can lessen suffering. As egos, we create needless suffering for ourselves. For example, there's a lot of suffering in striving for greatness. Part of growing up is getting clear on how we create suffering for ourselves and how we can let go of that. I do agree with you in that embracing suffering is part of the practice.

I get what you're saying but I disagree with this. Each stage comes with its own level of suffering and dissatisfaction. When suffering increases to the point that you can no longer ignore it, its time to reassess your values. But, because you've been stuck in the same way of thinking for so long it's difficult to know what the next step is. That's where the map REALLY starts to have value. It can save you a lot of time in figuring out how to step out of suffering and move into a more sustainable way of being. These things aren't accessible at all stages on the spiral. And I would not say life is about embracing suffering, it's about realizing how you can minimize suffering and stepping out of it. To draw from Buddhism, that's what the eight-fold path is all about.

Doesn't LSD just come on a paper tab, gel, or drop of liquid? How do you measure the level of potency?

I did pickup for years and was a bootcamp instructor. Pickup taught me a lot about women and pushed my comfort zone. I still have skills from back in the day. But now I emphasize connecting with women and meeting them more organically. I don't drink anymore, but when I do hit the bars, I simply open up girls who are sitting next to me and chat them up. I have less of a gung-ho mentality. That said, there are stages in the pickup artist's career. Spiral dynamics is a wonderful tool to breaking down those stages. I used to try to get every hot girl and force attraction. Now I look for kind and interesting women while maintaining an understanding of attraction. I feel that I've integrated the feminine but still have masculine traits. This drives quality women absolutely crazy.

I decided that I wanted to have a healthy relationship with smoking weed. It makes me introspective, but it can also make me feel lazy. So, I only smoke it in the evening after everything I need to do is complete. I don't smoke it to make me feel better or if I'm bored. I like to take a puff, then sit down with a pen and get my thoughts on paper. Does smoking weed make you introspective? Or does it make you feel dull and lazy? Do you smoke it to get a pleasant feeling out of it or perhaps for entertainment? Are you still doing the things you need to do? These are questions you need to ask yourself. Get clear on what a healthy relationship with smoking looks like.

@peqkno Interesting article. Thanks.

It's helpful to have routines or practices but a rigid schedule can really wear you down.

What are good resources for learning about spiral dynamics? Also, how comprehensive are Leo's videos?

Good stuff guys.

You have to look at spiral dynamics more systematically. I believe you can be mostly orange, or mostly green, or whatever, but to say someone is orange isn't quite right. There are a lot of variables to consider in each so called "stage". This coincides more with my understanding of spiral dynamics. You get that if you start to see everything in systems. Break life down into 6 categories: relationships, career, health, spirituality, learning, and recreation. Now ask the question what color am I in those categories? That's what I think happened with me. There are some very underdeveloped aspects of my personality. However, I am very self-aware and think philosophically. I may try that.

LOL, no it's not. Find someone with similar values who's at the same stage of development as you. Not a fixer upper so you can prop up your ego.

First thing, life is hard by design. Take up any new hobby and you will find that it's hard. Second, all aspects of life become easier the more skilled you become. The key is to commit to something until you learn the skills and develop the strength to become engaged in whatever you're doing.

@LoveandPurpose It certainly is. It takes self-awareness to know when to take a step back.

Similar story here. I lived in Portland OR for three years. A very green city, lots of yellows too. Now I'm back in Southern California. I decided to seek out the greens at meetups, yoga studios, zen centers, and couch surfing events. So far, I've met a lot of great people. I don't care what the rest of the world is doing as long as I have interesting friends to hang out with.

I have a Zen teacher and a therapist. Both are incredibly helpful.

Nietzches had a solution for this called the eternal recurrence. https://www.thoughtco.com/nietzsches-idea-of-the-eternal-recurrence-2670659

It's an ongoing clarification of values. Continually ask yourself, "which area of life do I feel least content?" Relationships, career, health, spirituality, education, recreation, spirituality. Get really clear on the reasons for dissatisfaction and the path becomes clear.

Ever heard the saying, "Two steps forward, one step back." That summarizes the process.

First of all, I'm highly introverted and not a very social guy. Second of all, I find very few people interesting and don't enjoy social interactions that much. Lastly, I'm also a bit awkward and would consider my social skills to be pretty low. One of the things I've been curious about lately is whether or not it's worth learning social skills. Experience tells me the more skilled I am at something the more enjoyable that thing. So I thought that by learning social skills I may enjoy my social interactions more. However, I'm not sure that's true in the realm of relationships. Maybe, I'm just not really that into people. This has been an ongoing inquiry for some time and all I can really say at this point is I'm not really sure. I welcome any advice but I'm really curious to hear about your experiences. What do you guys think?

I think my shift into meaninglessness was due to similar realizations. But I also struggled with the notion that nothing lasts and that pleasure wasn't as abundant as I had once hoped. Relationships come and go, health declines, we have to spend so much time doing things not of our choosing, we have very little control over external factors, etc. I had to really reassess what I valued in relationships, work, hobbies, health, personal growth, education, and spirituality. Now I pursue more simple pleasures rather than highs and peak experiences. I'm much more at peace but sometimes I struggle with the fact that most people have really shitty or non-existent value systems which makes me feel a bit isolated.

On one end of the spectrum is acceptance, on the other is commitment. It takes practice to learn to balance the two. The main thing to look for is struggle. Struggle lets you know you are trying too hard and need to shift into acceptance mode. Progress happens very slowly and you can't push the river, so to speak. It's important to really see that in your own experience. Shift into commitment mode when you find yourself slipping into distractions and laziness.

I know from personal experience that meditation can be used to avoid life. Spiritual bypassing. Too much meditation can be used as an escape from one's problems and responsibilities.

I've gone through this, and quite frankly, I'm not sure there is a way out. I've been stuck here for 5 years. The good news is that the feeling of meaninglessness has lessened. The question I have for you is why does life feel meaningless? I have a few resources for you to check out and see if the shoe fits, but I'm curious to hear more about your experience.