ivankiss

A thought chasing enlightenment. Enlightenment says: You can't catch me. Thought becomes spiritual.

Two polarities hanging out. One says: We're in a bar. The other one says: There is no bar. Nothing happens.

How does the giggle occur? This might be fun.

Yesterday I was reminded that I am home and that I was home all along. Love is omnipresent. I am Love, Love I am. Today, I am new. And this brings up new questions and wonder. Can anyone satisfy my curiosity? I've been contemplating like mad for the past couple of days. This forum is so helpful, I love it. So. Questions. Is the "ego" the direct "Opposite" to The One? Does it only appear to it this way, because it believed it was excluded, rather than included this whole "time"? Is the "ego's" biggest fear being excluded and facing the fact, that it only deluded itself into believing it was ever excluded? Does the "ego" resist inclusion while simultaneously desires to be included? Is this what creates the paradox? Is this the loop? When and where did I separate myself? Am I doing it now? Does this paradox directly give birth to the 3 dimensional reality, that appears to be? Is the "time" that passes before my finger touches the wall merely a "lag effect"? Is there nothing between me and the wall, in actuality? Where exactly does the touch occur? Is everything right in my face?! Is everything somehow glued directly onto me? Onto Nothing? Why does the Whole appear to be somewhat hollow? Does this seize to appear so after the One is correctly actualized? How can I fully recognize the ongoing coding/decoding and catch up with it? How does One make the cat move while remaining still, doing nothing? How does One keep moving the cat around the apartment? Is the cat moving the One or is it appearing within IT? Is reality as it is known some sort of a glitch? How can I be and not be at the same time? Is reality the field between two magnets, that are somehow One in actuality? Is this the definition of The ultimate Miracle and should it be left as it is and simply be admired? How can the "ego" feel included and stay home? I'd love to clarify these. There is a desire to close the open endings. Is that a "no-no"? Should they be left as they are? Is any assistance possible? Thank you.

The Truth is the Lie. There certainly is no One, and there definitely is. The Truth is insignificant and all-important. Everything IS even if the One isn't. One is here now. Luv you @Nahm

@Nahm Is there a source of the light that shines over nothing? Is this how One is? Contemplation is fun. And somewhat scary. Which makes it even more fun. The mind is still distorted though. Will zoom out, thank you.

@Nahm That...Was...Intense...And...Extremely...Precise. Please be more gentle with me, haha. I needed to take a short walk to catch my breath. I noticed the subject starting to become an object. Everything got super synchronized. There is more fear. I guess I am not ready just yet, I want to take one step at a time. My cellular memory was not happy about this (if there is such a thing). I desperately needed to distract myself immediately... I'll keep on reading through your answers day after day until I slowly merge with them. Thank you so much. @ground Reading this, after the walk, grounded me a lot. Thank you. @Strikr Thank you for your wisdom. I proved a lot to myself here, with your help. The question of free will is precisely that. A question. Love you all so much. No further questions.

How do you play the game after realizing and fully integrating the fact that you are playing a game? Do you dedicate yourself to waking "others" up and triggering them into their version of the same realization? Or is this attempt paradoxical and/or even impossible to achieve? Is it a "waste of time"? Do you keep on expressing the Self and planting seeds for everyone? Or do you simply allow the unfolding? Do you play the game while intentionally not breaking character or do you try exposing the fact that everyone is a character within the game? Is there a point after the point? Should you become even more self-oriented after this realization or open up yourself for service to "others" and serve only? Should you just simply be? Or should you be a conscious co-creator? How do you play the game? I am honestly curious.

What if playing the game is my highest desire? What if I choose to be involved in the "storm"? What if I choose to keep my one eye closed? Can I harm myself or postpone my evolution in any way by choosing to do so? Am I allowed to do so? Is there even anyone who can allow or disallow me to do so? Am I asking anything that makes sense? Should I stop asking? Should I be playing? Is wanting to experiment, have fun and express against anything? Is wanting to feel and be involved a bad thing? Thank you for your clarifications

How can I practice not forgetting that I am the calm appreciating the storm? How can I be the unconditional love allowing the expression to unfold?Will everything unfold on its own or do I need to participate? Why am I afraid of not having everything explained and put in right place before fully letting go? I know I seize to exist once I seize to think. But I am not powerful enough to "resist" the urge to eventually return to thinking and call my thoughts my own. Who will do "the work" if I let go? Nobody? Where do I create everything from? Only here and now? Do I create at all? Or is there meant to be observance and allowing only?

Mirror is the perfect word, yes. I know nothing has changed in reality. That is why I am confused about how to continue creating it. I know I want to be Love and be Light, and I know the importance of diversity. But I want to know am I truly sharing any of this with anyone? Or does it simply reflect back onto "me" from the mirror? Thank you for your suggestion on the book, will check it out

Thank you @Nahm. (for the laughs as well ) How can I be certain that there is such a thing as "them"? Is there a way for me to have some sort of a confirmation from my limited point of view? And why does this question bring a sense of panic on a level beyond the character? Am I overlooking something? Am I asking these questions from a "wrong" place? Why does this leave me with a sense of solitude on a level beyond the character? Why do I feel like I am confusing this with my ego's fears while I simultaneously and honestly feel like it is not coming from that place. Is God lonely?

@Strikr Can my way of playing the game affect anyone? Or is this illusory and deliberately "made" to seem so? Is this the ultimate definition of freedom or is it a trap?

@FoxFoxFox Is the game complete once the Self is correctly realized?

In my opinion, ego death is the doorway to enlightenment and it should not be forced or chased, rather allowed. Become comfortable with contradictions and paradoxes.

Do not force anything. One could say that life itself is a mystical experience. It is on us to recognize this.

Hi Giulio. In my experience, it's all about your passion. Whatever it is that you do. And if nothing really excites or fulfills you at the moment, that's quite all right. This means you have all the options and possibilities laid in front of you. You are free to experiment, try out new things, engage in new activities and ventures. Spend some time wondering what it is that attracts you and enables you best to express yourself and provide some sort of value to everybody else. You are not "getting old". You are transforming. Embrace the unknown and get excited about finding your "thing". I wish you luck on your journey!

@luckieluuke You got it right. I indeed do have some music online, glad you're interested in hearing it. Sending it your way via p.m.

@Identity Evidence is limiting. It is partial rather that all-inclusive. The external world = the internal world. And wise-versa. Quite literally so. Nothing is true and everything is true simultaneously. Trying to grasp this causes confusion and extreme contradictions. Ultimately, there is no such thing as "objectivity". There is only direct experience, which is completely subjective in it's nature. Always and forever. You only ever interact with yourself

@Seed This may or may not be true from his point of view. Whatever the "case" might be, it is of course completely understandable and acceptable. Leo is a well-appreciated teacher. And that comes with great "responsibility". I love him and his ways of teach/learning - learn/teaching. I do not mean to disrespect him or this forum in any way. I was simply sharing my experience with the intention of spreading awareness from a slightly different angle. I want to repeat, that I was not influenced by him or his work in any shape or form. What I did, I'd do regardless. Besides which I barely saw a handful of his videos prior to "the incident". Which were not directly pointing to psychedelics or enlightenment.

@Leo Gura I can agree on that. But again, I think I emphasized the fact, that this is a perfect display of how not to use psychedelics.

God is ignorant. And judgment also always finds a way to express itself, as ignorance does. You cannot "fuck up". Why all the division? How does this not contradict directly the law of oneness?

Hello Amirali. I want to try and answer your questions, as I myself tend to get confused about this "from time to time". You do not literally kill yourself in order to "reach enlightenment". Although it sure feels that way while you are "dissolving the ego". The Truth is not pleasant to the persona. When you "kill yourself" you simply stop identifying with your "human" form only. With the main character you thought you were your whole life. "You" do not feel joy anymore. You ARE joy. You are bliss. And you are also everything else you can and cannot imagine. Welcome to the forum.

@Baotrader Correct me if I'm wrong. You assume that somehow Leo contributed to the "destruction of my life"? Why? How does a teacher contribute to the destruction of other people's lives? I'd say that is impossible. The teacher can only destruct his own life. A student can only destruct his own life. I did not choose to do so. My life is just fine. Better than ever, to be frank. And that is my choice. Leo had little to nothing to do with this. My actions were not influenced by him or his teachings in any way. A teacher is a channel. A messenger. Just as we all are. There is no teaching without learning and no learning without teaching. The two are not separate from each other. You cannot contribute to destruction. You can only self-destruct.

Hi there. I read your story twice, thank you for sharing. I want to applaud your level of courage, steadiness and also your depth of compassion, connection and understanding. Doing what you did for your friend(?) was nice and very supportive. Also thank you for all the "hints" and suggestions on how to be responsible with psychedelics. I sense you are well-experienced and know your "craft". The peace and bliss during your trip(s) are obvious confirmations. Enjoy the journey. Much respect.