flowboy

I prefer ejaculation control over birth control. I use condoms + not cumming during the fertile weeks, it doesn't require messing with hormones and also it has the added benefit of retaining more energy. I'm going to delete this post if I become a dad soon Maybe just put those male contraceptive hormones in the drinking water? Until the population size is more favorable. How about that?

I see you've found the Shift key The Enter key is right above it, try it sometime. I liked that description of acting out of need. I might add that acting out of need often comes from subconsciously fulfilling childhood needs in adult life, which doesn't work.

@koyadr3 I understand. It's very common to have resistance against feeling. But feeling your real feelings fully is the only way to get to know yourself, and getting to know yourself is the only way to properly express yourself, and expressing yourself is the only way to get laid and enjoy friendships. This is why I recommend shadow work. And a good therapist, if you can afford it or your insurance will cover it. I spend a lot of time guiding people on how to feel, it's very common to not know one's own emotions, and I see over and over again how it keeps them from knowing what they want in life and getting it. You're going to have to go through it, get to know your own emotions, and work with those. It leads to a fuller and more complete-feeling life. It leads to not feeling inferior, having a calm mind and enjoying talking to women and friends without much worry. I'm assuming that that's what you want. When you've made the decision to face your feelings, let me know and I can point you to some helpful resources.

Well, you already have schizophrenia, how much worse could it get? It definitely tends to reactivate psychotic breaks in people with schizophrenia. The tricky part is that you'll probably have to be off your meds for the psychedelic to even work. So then you'd need somebody to tripsit you and remind you to take your meds again afterwards. And what if you go nuts and refuse? I don't know. It's a risky endeavor but some people do it. Hallucinations and mania are a last defense against devastating traumatic memories resurfacing. You might want to look at working with a trauma therapist to dig some of those out, it has been anecdotally documented to be curative.

It's very much old feelings trying to come up. Daily substance use is almost always self-medicating trauma. I've got an old feeling coming up right now. I can tell because I not only feel gloomy and negative, but I also have mental "pop-ins" from years ago, like suddenly remembering the password for my computer that I had when I was 20, or suddenly feeling transported back there, as an overlay over current daily experience. The subconscious is good at hinting what needs to be processed, if you're in the habit of listening. I'm not doing nearly enough to answer its call in these busy weeks, I should be making time for self-regression multiple times a week. @mrPixel Coffee sucks but I know what it's like to have a substance hold your mental state together. I had that with nicotine. If you can't do therapy or self-therapy, and just want a quick fix, look for supplements that contain citicholine. I use mind lab pro. You can also temporarily take St. John's Wort supplements, they are a natural antidepressant herb. Works very well for me.

Those are emotions. Or rather, negative thoughts stemming from emotions that you’re not fully feeling. you’re not a “chill dude”, you’re repressed. You don’t feel safe or good enough to express yourself. In the company of friends, or strangers, outside you act as a chill dude but inside your mind it’s a horror show. That’s because of emotions. This is why people are recommending emotional mastery to you. This is why I recommend shadow work. You’re very emotional, you just haven’t gained the awareness yet.

I dealt with a lot of that, to the point where I can have a "bad trip" in my mind, sober, with an unsuspecting girl on the couch, lol. Self-amusement is really helpful. I think practicing and commanding oneself to "relax" is difficult and often has the opposite effect. It's much easier to find something funny.

Well, he's not taking up the position of "best friend" anymore. And it can be painful to face that. So he's signalling to you that you need to find a replacement for that, someone who can be there for you when heavy things happen. In my opinion, if he doesn't make any time to see you if you get the news that your dad has cancer, he's no longer a friend. Whether you call him an acquaintance, a former friend or a distant friend is up to you and your standards. What you need to do is hang out with someone else and stop trying with this guy. Let him come to you, but only for real meetings, not zoom calls. Maybe he'll see the error of his ways someday. Don't wait for it though.

Did someone ever tell you there's an Enter and a Shift key?

Thread is a year old, was revived by a spammer.

@koyadr3 When I was your age and had soul-crushing social anxiety, made so many social errors that everyone hated me and I had no friends, and I couldn't talk to girls without freaking out, I got angry enough about my situation to bear the pain of changing it. This defeated attitude is what's going to repel women, much more than your height. Social anxiety and low self esteem have their roots in childhood trauma, they can be improved through practice + therapy. So on the one end, push yourself, and then on the other end, process your past. That's the formula for personal transformation. I know it's hard. But you can get laid, a lot, if you want to. You just can't do it with a victim attitude.

You're already getting paranoid just by being there. I've had a job once (door to door sales) where most people including the owner were scammers or criminals or lowlifes. And they scam each other constantly when they can, too. After I quit, they kept trying to suck me into their toxic world with promises of making more money if I sold for them, some shady enterprise with a shady product, joined this or that MLM scheme, maybe grow a little weed in my house or sell it for them, it was an absolute shitfest and I regret going along with their schemes even a little bit. Those people are like bloodsuckers. Give them the benefit of the doubt and they see it as a weakness, they'll assume you're a sucker they can profit from. Ask critical questions and demand to read the contract you're signing, and they get hostile. Meanwhile, they are constantly broke, in debt, in trouble with the law, and blowing all of their money on cocaine. I've hung out with psychopaths, rapists and lowlifes quite a bit in my early twenties, due to my naivete and the fact that they were work colleagues. Can't say it did my mindset a lot of good. I did get sucked into a scam, what's worse, I let these people interact with my parents on one occasion and they tried to suck them in too, which I facilitated. I'm still ashamed about that, haha. It didn't cost me any money in the end, but I got sucked into their violent, criminal mindset for a bit, which definitely had some negative consequences. I would say get out, it's a poisonous environment. Are you writing a book on lowlifes, and that is your life purpose? Then take the risk and stay. That would be the only exception. People who have 75 million don't show up in kiosks.

Yes, that could work. I love watching relatable journeys of transformation, many people do. But then you actually have to be willing to look stupid and film yourself not having answers to most of your questions yet. Figuring out what your "thing" will be should already be part of the journey. In other words: start now. If you make a video a week, then you also have a nice motivation to make progress at it.

@Someone here It's all permutations of: create something that you enjoy providing, that certain people are very eager to pay money for, and then get lots of people to buy it from you without the time it costs you increasing with it. You have a creative brain, you can figure something like that out right? I choose to disregard the voices that say you need to have a job first, because it takes very different qualities to be a successful business person, qualities that are not developed or stimulated at all when having a kushy job. For example: original thinking, being a dissident being innovative and disruptive being self-motivated tenacity & persistence All these are lulled to sleep when being managed in a 9-5, not saying you have to choose either-or and jobs are bad, not at all, I've just ran into too many people who think that if they work or study long enough, they "someday" will be more ready to start a business because of that. It's BS for the most part. Yes you can get experience and knowledge about a certain field while working in it, but you would also get that if you would start a business in it, and much more quickly. Yes 90% of business fail blah blah blah, a tenacious business owner starts something new after one thing doesn't work/stops working and they continue making a killing, I've seen it up close. 100% of tenacious people succeed. Having said that, I have always been tenacious at certain things. I know 100% certain, in my heart, that I would never give up, no matter how many ideas don't work or how stupid I look. And that's good because I've already had many failures and adversities. If you're not that tenacious, and most are not, better get a job because you'll never be financially independent. If you are, then stop wasting time and go make some money.

Okay, discussion over then.

@Gesundheit2 Good example of the harsh, unfeeling, unempathetic attitude that I'm saying mental health professionals shouldn't have. What you write seems to be from a place of evaluating who's wrong, who to judge, whose fault it is. You can do that, it doesn't interest me very much but you can run that mental experiment if you want. My thesis is that mental health professionals / authorities should not have that attitude. Look for who's wrong all you want, I'm just not speaking from that perspective because I don't see the point. The situation is what it is, people are what they are because of what happened when they were developing. From that perspective, indeed, personal responsibility falls away but healing opportunities open. I agree that people have their personal responsibility to "do the work", seek out therapy and do it, yes. Can I put responsibility on them to not be a certain way? To not react emotionally to this or that? I'd love to, but it just makes no sense. These impulses come from a place that is prior to will.

@Someone here Order MJ DeMarco's books. Thank me later.

@Gesundheit2 lol, this is not about me I don't have BPD. Yes, someone else's words can hurt someone with BPD more easily, that does mean they have work to do. Classifying them as inherently selfish is unhelpful. The reason they are more sensitive is because their system is overloaded with emotional pain. Not from your thoughts and words, but from their childhood. With that amount of overload of chronic emotional pain, they are going to be sensitive and selfish, like anyone else would who is always in a large amount of pain, be it physical or emotional. Hence the thumb screws example.

If you worry whether you're a narcissist, you ain't a narcissist. @Wisebaxter I'm balls deep in the shadow work & therapy topic so beware of my bias. I don't think enlightenment work is the appropriate tool for the job. Insights don't cure neurotic behavior patterns. This is also why talk therapy is so ineffective. You can make someone understand why they behave the way they behave, but it doesn't change because of that. There is value in understanding how your psyche works. It's not just "the mind". There's levels to it. Beliefs, thoughts, attitudes and interpretations are only the outer layer. Deeper layers contain childhood feelings and baby feelings. Including repressed, unprocessed ones. These push on to the outer layer and twist the beliefs, thoughts, attitudes and interpretations. A superiority complex could be one of a myriad of effects of that. I don't agree that unhealthy aspects of the ego should be left "as is", or just "accepted". Of course, you can, but they won't go anywhere. Much better to actually work through it and transform it to create a healthier ego. If you've got the time and the inclination. Regression therapy, primal therapy, some forms of shadow work, those will get you a resolution. See also my video on why therapy works and what makes it work.

Everyone who is in pain is self-centered. It's not an aspect of a "diseased" psyche that other people get to pretend they are clean from. What people don't understand is that this type of disorder is basically like having chronic pain. There is a chronic emotional pain at the root of it. It's always there but it is repressed, not conscious. If I put screws in your thumbs and clamps on your nipples, you're going to be selfish too.

@StarStruck https://www.prionline.nl/therapeuten/ I believe this is what you're looking for. PRI is a therapy form grounded in past re-experiencing, which, as I've explained in videos and posts is the only thing that can truly be curative. The methodology is somewhat watered-down, with a spiritual touch which I find somewhat unnecessary, but it's in all probability way better than the talk therapy BS you'd normally be fed.

Thanks!! @acidgoofyWhich book does he describe my case in? Would love to read that!

What I'd love for @Leo Gura to understand, is this: lately he's been losing his patience with people and been rude and abusive. That can happen to anyone, BUT if you're the leader of a community, and you are structurally rude and abusive to people, then what will happen over time is that ONLY the people willing to tolerate abuse, will stay. Now you've got a group full of admirers willing to take the abuse every day, hearing how stupid and worthless they are, in exchange for being in the in-group. And the ones who have some status, will copy that behavior, as well. I've already seen mods (I won't name names) be very rude, dismissive and ridiculing people, more than ever before. That's cult dynamics that Leo certainly has said multiple times he wants to absolutely prevent. So he's shooting himself in the foot here. Assuming he actually has feet. We've never seen proof of that.