Ampresus

Good day everyone. Life is getting real for me believe it or not. I wanted to search for studies and follow the intructions my school gave me today to prepare a bit, but realized very quickly that a lot of different studies seem interesting to me. For example, on one hand I want to do something in primatology, but on the other hand I want to study psychedelics too. As I was going down the entire list of studies which fit my favorite categories (33 pages total, 10 studies per page), I only got to page 10 before having to slow down. I have written down 21 studies already. Stuff is getting overwhelming. I think it would be best if I hear some personal stories. Where did you guys study? I was personally planning to go to university somewhere in Canada, but am open to any options really. What did you guys like/dislike about studying? How long did the study take? Did you have time to visit friends/family or just in general any free time? Did it take time to adjust to studying instead of normal school? Have you ever been to a university? Last but not least: How can I implement self-actualization into this? I want to connect my path here with my study, hence why studying psychedelics seems so interesting to me. Not trying to become the next Terence Mckenna or anything, but the scientific research behind all of it seems so fascinating. Cheers.

@Arcangelo No

I know I'm late here, very late as a matter of fact, but I felt like posting here something. Fasting and meditation go hand in hand yes. I have never heard of this: But am interested in trying out if this is actually true. Usually I meditate around 6 PM or the last half hour before the sun goes down (I meditate everyday for 30 mins atm) Though I have to say: it's very energy absorbing. It's difficult to concentrate on important tasks and if you have any deadlines or stuff like that you might feel even more stressed. Right now I have online classes and focussing/keeping up with the homework etc can be very frustrating. Then again, it's better then going out (it's summer where I live). Good luck.

I'll save you the trouble if you won't mind. I had this with TVD as well yes.

Hello everyone. Recently I finished what is in my opinion the best series on earth. However, besides that this is the second time I have finished it, I have this empty and sad feeling. I miss watching that show now. I miss the characters, the fun, the plot. I am sad because I’ve already seen it. This might sound irrational for some people, but this also effects me in other ways. I have no motivation to do anything at all. Be it making homework, talking with family or friends online or working on something. I don’t experience joy anymore. I feel depressed. Didn’t really know where to put this. I think the “Serious Emotional Problems” sub-forum isn’t meant for these types of posts. I am posting this because it also brings back older thoughts and emotions about ending my life. I keep having the idea of just ending it. I will no longer experience that kind of legendary bliss again, and currently with quarantine I’m stuck with tons of homework and school assignments. I hate my teachers. Everything seems so depressing and sad compared to the joy I had watching that series. Maybe I went a bit off-topic there, but I hope someone can help me. I am currently focussing on meditation to help my mind calm down.

Happy birthday Leo. I can’t thank you enough for changing my whole perspective on life. I hope you are safe and get loads of gifts (if that is what you are into)

Meditate, meditate, meditate...

@PlayTheGame I tried almond milk for a long time, saw Kurzgesagt's video about milk, switched to soy. Apparently soy does have more benefits for the environment. Video of reference:

Nice vid man

Just when I started replacing milk with soy milk you guys come with this...

So I went on vacation with my sister and mother to Istanbul, Turkey. I have been here before, but that was back when I traveled with my dad (and sister etc.) My parents are divorced and so I decided to travel with my mom for a change (sister made the same choice). I am a decently build male, people think I am at least 18 years old and if I don’t shave I reach 22 sometimes! However, I notice how wary I am of other boys (or just old men) staring at my mom and/or sister. I always feel this slight sensation of NEEDING to defend them (formally my dad used to carry this burden). Shit is driving me crazy sometimes. Whenever they catch my presence they start to look away, but I sometimes notice people still trying to catch a glimpse. I don’t blame them. Porn is banned in Turkey. Most people here are muslims and have only had one sexual partner. Personally I do it too and I bet I have made many fathers and brothers here go nuts. Hell, I have never had any sexual partner. At least these grown ass men have made some progress. When we went to take a Turkish bath, there was a fitness room. I saw a young dude with his chest out coming all the way to the front practice machine and starting to work out heavily. He kept looking at our direction. Not gonna lie: He looks decent. But I hope you can understand the amount of pity I felt for him. I don’t suppose he can walk up to any girl on the street here (could be a taboo idk). Anyways, what would you advice me to do? Should I just try to worry less? I am also constantly wary of pickpockets and other scammers.

I honestly do not know where else to put this. I thought I should at least give this forum a try before consulting a professional. Lately I've been getting ''nightmares'' about a girl. I don't know the girl personally, but I know OF her. My friend is good friends with her. Last night I dreamed of her again. We were normally socializing and playing a game. In the dream she expressed how she was surprised how good I was, and soon enough I was getting all kinds of notifications. Somehow people on the internet knew how she thought of me and wanted to play against me to see if I really were as good as she claimed. How is this a nightmare? I have had dreams of her before, but then she... ''stole'' my friends. I caught good friends of mine hanging out with her, calling her chill and stuff. Having a past with loneliness, you can understand how I felt during these dreams when all of the sudden my friends were one by one leaving me for a girl I didn't know. A girl with apparently huge influence. In real life, this same girl actually became friends with one of my closest friends. And yes, that friend eventually left me. I know from a rational point that I am being too irrational about this. The fear of someone stealing my friends is just a projection. But the dreams don't seem to stop. I wake up everytime because of these dreams, being extremely scared (breathing heavily etc.). At some points when I woke up because of it I was 100% convinced all my friends would leave me for her. Any advice will do. Have a nice day.

@bejapuskas Talking, laughing, hanging out more with the girl than with me. Even though before I used to be incredibly close with these people. It’s a dream after all...

A week ago I talked to an ex-bodybuilder. He said that his goal was to become one again, while at the same time helping a friend out with losing weight. He asked me what my goal was, with which I responded that I don’t have one. I just want to be healthy, decently athletic. My first goal was losing weight and I achieved that a long time ago. Now I just wanna stay in shape. He responded with that one cannot really NOT have a goal in fitness. He explained that he himself started around my age, and slowly built up to become the bodybuilder he wanted to be (although he made some mistakes like lifting weights just to brag). If an ex-bodybuilder says you need a goal, it really can leave one confused. What do you guys think? Maybe I should try to lower my fat percentage a bit more, 20% is still something I suppose.

I find it easier to talk to older women. Keep in mind: I'm under 18 years old. Anyone from roughly 22 to 46 falls in the same category here for me. Today, for example, I was at the gym (lockers to be exact) when I spoke to an older woman. She didn't look THAT old, but still. Not my age. Because at school I always call my female teachers ''Miss'' and have to treat them differently, I did kind of the same with this woman. Of course I didn't call her ''Miss'', but in my language there is a certain replacement for the word ''she'' and ''he'' which one uses when talking to someone they have to show respect for, and I did the same to this woman. When we were done talking, I walked in the dressing room a bit embarrassed. I kind of ruined that didn't I? Not that older women are necessarily my type, I still find it easier to talk to them. How could I potentially improve this? In general, how does one hit on older women?

I feel like creativity + authenticity gets really rewarded on YouTube. Especially creativity. I don’t know why people have this obsession with thumbnails and titles. I have seen videos with terrible thumbnails get so many views, even if those YouTubers didn’t have a huge following in the first. Praying that someday the algorithm will favor you is also something. Getting into other people’s recommendations is probably a lot more effective than promoting yourself on social media.

Good show indeed ??

Hello everyone. (If you couldn't care less about the context, main question is down below in Bold.) I am very young. Usually this shouldn't be much of an issue, but I hope it helps you understand the situation I am in. I want to start working, but not at McDonalds. Or be a pizza delivery guy. I realized that I didn't need the money. I really don't. My parents buy everything I need and I don't want to go through the boredom/stress/stupid boss experiences because of a minimum wage job. All my friends already have jobs, I am the only one left behind. I want to work for the United Nations someday. Help people in third-world countries. I think it would be good for me to get out of this corporate western society for a while. I also want to help nature, help species in Africa which are close to extinction. Thing is though: I am not 18. And no non-profit seems to be willing to hire someone of my age. Trust me, the UN made it clear that I should be at least 18. My parents, friends and even my uncle suggested I should get a normal job so I can get my own money. That it would be smart for future me to stand a chance in the competition that is the adult-world. I, personally, just don't feel like doing a dead-end job. I want to help people in need. I think this would also benefit my Green side more. Extra stuff which might be important for the topic: - In a few years, if stuff goes right, I'll be going to Uni - I have 0 work experience - I am well aware that Leo and other people on this forum stressed ''fixing your skillset'' and that I should really be focussing on that more than work experience, I am just curious about what you guys think about this So my main question is: Should I focus on getting a 'normal' job (9-5 type of thing), or just ignore it and try finding volunteer work?

For further reference, see https://www.actualized.org/start (scroll down to find the biggest traps) It's about this one: Conflating knowledge acquisition with growth/development It might be me. English isn't my best language and so I don't really understand half of the sentence. I tried to translate it, saw the translation, and then wondered how THAT could be a trap. What I think it means: Thinking that acquiring knowledge on its own is equal to growth/development. I am not sure though. If this is the case, could someone explain me how that is not equal to growth? I thought educating oneself is done, so that the person may learn and improve. Thanks in advance.

Hello everyone. I have this dilemma during every type of break. Be it summer break or christmas holiday. Like any other, I have some free time on my hands because of christmas. I don't even celebrate christmas. Now during vacations it is somehow harder for me to go to the gym, because I feel like I am giving up my free time. My time to calm down from the stress from school. I go three times a week and am a teen. My break only lasts 2 weeks. Don't know if that matters, but thought I'd put that out there. Do you have any advice for me? (Just because I want to quit gym temporarily, doesn't mean I'll go back to eating unhealthy stuff like candy. I will still eat fruit almost everyday and avoid sweets, sodas etc.)

@Knock and @DrewNows ty for responding

I mean the following video: These are rather specific questions for Leo, but if anyone else cares to help me out please do 1. Does watching YouTube videos on a daily basis count as the same junk as television? I mean to be fair, there is a lot of junk out there on the internet. I am struggling a lot with cutting this part out in particular, because I grew up watching YouTube. I usually watch gaming streamers and, sorry for the old fellas here, but so called ''meme'' videos. They make me laugh a lot, which makes it harder to quit. 2. How about Netflix shows? Recently they put up Spongebob Squarepants on Netflix, and I have such a hard time cutting that out. It's my youth man! It still makes me laugh. I have this deep rationalization in my mind that I should watch it because it always has been a part of me, but I also have this thought in my mind that says ''yeah but Leo pretty much said I shouldn't binge-watch anything, Spongebob can't be an exception''. I also watch ''Our Planet'', does this count as junk? (Bonus 3. I am stuck with your contemplation alternative. I am currently struggling with ''what is reality?''. I can't really put the right words for it (how to define reality I mean). Any tips perhaps? I also, occasionally, lose my concentration 5 seconds after trying to contemplate. Should I ALSO do concentration practices?) Thanks in advance.

Meditation. Seriously man, it helps the craziest mind take a break.

@LfcCharlie4 & @Michael569 thank you for the responses. It is really helpful

I don’t know about team sports. I only really do fitness. I used to suck at team sports and so I quit them. Here is a piece of advice that always worked for me (during fitness): try to channel all your emotions into energy. Could be anxiety, resistance and even loneliness. The last one worked for me, which came as a shock for sure. Your own individual skillset and your mindset are different things. You could be the best in the world, and yet have resistance because your head isn’t in the game. You need to be in the present moment in the game. Think of all the resistance and slap it with confidence. Whenever I plank, it’s always the last seconds that can get me down. All the mental pressure and stress from thinking too much in that last minute, I channel to my last bit of energy. Your highest power is yourself mate. Only you can set the limits. Best of luck man.